The Luke and Pete Show

What does male self care mean to you? Remember, there are no right or wrong answers to this question; to Luke it means going to a football match alone. To Peter it's a dog walk and a wank. Do whatever works for you. Today on The Luke and Pete Show, Peter is dropping extortionate amounts of money in the NCP, Luke is drinking shandies and doesn't care who judges him (he definitely does), and we explore further why a man has bought the Commodore brand. Oh, and we may have to prise open the Battery Daddy again...Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pete tries to do a nice thing for his niece and ends up tearing around central London on a doomed quest to find a Labubu. The labubu he eventually landed turned out to be fake and probably filled with soiled bandages. Oh well.The lads also take the time to discuss fake merchandise, mundane celebrity encounters and why a bakery that doesn't serve any food is quite probably destined to fail. Never trust a trendy baker, that's their advice. Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After copping a tremendous amount of deserved flak from general practitioners everywhere for his ill-advised comments, Luke is considering shaving off his moustache and keeping a low profile by becoming a butcher's boy. Pete thinks it's a bad idea - too many euphemisms with middle aged women to deal with.On today's produce-themed episode we also hear about the godfather of British cheese as well as find out why you shouldn't entertain the idea of getting milkmen back. Got milk?Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Luke's been on a Disney cruise! He tells Pete all about it - the characters appearing out of nowhere and terrifying his son, the amazing places he visited, the idle fantasies about jumping into the briny sea and how long he'd survive. The usual.On today's episode there's also time to crown an Official General Practitioner of The Luke and Pete Show, and Luke gets in big trouble for saying it's probably quite easy to be a GP. Turns out it isn't. Also, before they sign off for another Monday, the lads ruminate on which finger would be best to cut off. You know, if you absolutely had to.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Greetings, all! Where to start this week? Well, Pete celebrated Stak moving offices to central London by heading straight to Harley Street and having a fatty lump cut out of his back. It had to be done - it was stopping him sleeping properly. After that he tells Luke all about two ferrets he met on a walk this week, and although their owners didn't let him put them down his trousers, he was allowed to hold one of them briefly. What a victory in Pete's continuing quest for improved smalltalk! Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today's episode starts with an impassioned debate about whether you can drive both ways over the Queen Elizabeth Bridge in east London. If that doesn't get you excited to tune in, then frankly you're in the wrong place.The lads then wax lyrical about the ridiculous nature of drug policy in the UK, which then naturally segues into a chat about a bloke that kept medicating himself with colloidal silver to treat his dermatitis and turned his skin completely blue (he's now dead. Obviously). Finally, Pete is trying to give up pickles, but will a new dill pickle themed beverage tempt him back to the Devil's trough?Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pete's been thinking about opening his own nursery, but stumbles badly over what he'd call it. But never mind all that, because as ever on The Luke and Pete Show there are gherkins to eat, sandwich shops to assess and paper fortune tellers to learn about.Oh, and have the lads finally found an Official GP of The Luke and Pete Show? And does he know what he's doing? And is being a GP the easiest job in the entire medical profession?Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The lads have moved into a new office and are starting to roll out their best small talk efforts with their new colleagues. But something more pressing is on the agenda today, because Pete fears he may have been propositioned by a man in the local corner shop? And, more importantly, that might mean he can never go back there again.Elsewhere, there's a weird fantasy bloke on instagram that Pete hates (is jealous of), and we also learn about people drawing their own cartoon strips as kids, with no thought for the IP ramifications.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Are we living in an entirely new societal system? There's plenty of evidence to suggest we are. And it's called The Peteriarchy. But how many Petes are in charge, and who are they?Also on your all-new LAPS episode, Luke meets the only person in Britain that doesn't know where the Gallagher brothers are from, we lament the lack of Rocket From the Crypt in everyone's lives, and Pete delivers his treatise on how to perform a tracheotomy. Warning: it's not for the faint hearted.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pete and Luke are back to ask a question that is surely on the lips of everyone - who is the UK's National Trevor? There's also time to discuss how many cats Ozzy Osbourne killed in his life (clue: it's a lot), and then we talk about our favourite Brixton-based buskers.Elsewhere, there's the astonishing average age of the Greenland shark, why Pete doesn't like jellied eels, and a listener gets in touch to passionately defend Dutch cuisine. Does he win the lads over? Tune in to find out.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Please fill out Stak's listener survey! It'll help us learn more about the content you love so we can bring you even more - you'll also be entered into a competition to win one of five PlayStation 5's! Click here: https://bit.ly/staksurvey2025***Please take the time to rate us on your podcast app. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on your all-new LAPS portion: Luke meets the Bad Boy of Petanque in the flesh, there's some reminiscing about the abandoned 3D TV revolution and the lads learn about who *really* invented the telephone.Elsewhere, Luke remembers Good Shoes, Pete remembers Field Music and reveals the surprising thing they're up to now and there is a surprising plot twist in the battery chat. Could a lasagne really end up in the Battery Daddy? Tune in to find out...Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What foods would you say are acceptable to eat before midday? Unsurprisingly, Pete doesn't discriminate. Not that he can, mind you; his oven is inexplicably full of water so he can't cook anything anyway. Meanwhile, Luke is abusing and being abused when it comes to Lime bikes, and one of the lads has been belligerent to celebrated TV historian Dan Snow, and the other has made himself ill on gherkins. When will this nonsense ever end?Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What's Peter doing in the bathroom with a shard of porcelain stuck in his foot? And why are there bloody footprints everywhere? And more importantly, is it the same foot from which he accidentally squirted a blister over a nun's habit?Elsewhere, Luke has been to see Neil Young live, reopening last month's very lively debate about ol' Shakey, there's more Drumeo chat, and we marvel at the depths of cringe Drake is able to plumb. Oh, and we may have yet another new player flying into the Battery Daddy...Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pete's fluent in French! Who knew? Did Pete even know until this recording?The boys discover a definitive list of the world's hardest languages and a listener wonders if it's possible to receive a racist spatula. Plus, why pilots on YouTube are kinda soothing and Luke tells Pete once and for all: stop buying me lattes I don't drink.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What's your favourite internet fight? Luke and Pete list a few contenders, including a man getting told he's about to be thrown into a lake before being quite literally thrown into a lake.Elsewhere, the lads follow up Monday's music chat with a deep dive into a technical brutal death metal band that only write songs about Ancient Egypt, find out that Pete's dream festival involves quite a lot of potted meat, and still find the time to assess your latest battery submissions. Don't miss it, and make sure to hit subscribe or follow wherever you get your podcasts.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's something of a music-themed show today as Pete reveals he once interviewed Flea from Red Hot Chili Peppers and he had something resembling a torture rack in his dressing room. Aside from that we pour doubt on the credibility of Bruce Dickinson's polymath credentials and then get stuck into a bit of Black Sabbath.Also, have we come full circle in the "what to feed ducks" debate that's been raging around the UK for the last decade or so? Tune in to find out!Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pete saved a bird's life this week, but can he split the G on a pint of Guinness? And if he can, does that make him a 6 Music Dad? Elsewhere, the lads finally get around to discussing their highlights of Glastonbury, Luke goes to see the legendary Iron Maiden live and then there's a big old chat about instagram stalwart and professional adman Rory Sutherland, and his weird take on local buses.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Remember when Pete went to Newquay and put his foot through the ceiling of an AirBnB? Well he's once again returned to the scene of the crime, only this time there's another bigger boy there to help him with his parenting.Meanwhile, Luke somehow picks up two parking tickets in a single day, and a cafe in south London gets an astonishing delivery of beer. Oh, and then an orangutan entertains us all with his tales of derring-do. Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's a fine Thursday to discuss Pete's most inspirational piece of work yet - a lovely graphic of him kissing Noel Edmonds. Luke's not quite sure why he's done it, and being honest, nor is Pete. Still, it's nothing an entire box of Marc de Champagne truffles can't fix.The lads also find time to talk about Jeremy Clarkson, and run the rule over your latest battery submissions. How many new players are going to enter the game this week? Tune in to find out!Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Rejoice, for Luke and Pete are back! And this time around they're talking Jeff Bezos' wedding - what's the small talk going to be like?Meanwhile Pete is contemplating living off-grid as long as he can have a superfast broadband connection, which kind of defeats the point, and we hear from a genuinely inspirational vigilante Dad who, in a bastardisation of Liam Neeson in Taken, just wants his son's mountain bike back.Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.