The Non-Anxious Leader Podcast

The Non-Anxious Leader Podcast uses a family systems theory approach to increase your spiritual, emotional and physical well-being so you can be the best leader possible. Each episode explores research and practical tips to help you be a personal and professional non-anxious presence.

Episode 348: Non-Anxious Leaders Manage Their Own Anxiety without Involving Others (Rebroadcast)

Self-differentiation means that you are able to manage your own anxiety without involving others. This episode unpacks what this does (and doesn't) look like.Show Notes:Being the Captain of Your Own Ship by Kathleen SmithBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ emails.

09-15
12:37

Episode 347: 6 Ways Self-Differentiation Builds Leadership Courage - Part 2 of 2

Courage is the strength to act in the face of fear, uncertainty, or adversity. This episode covers the final four types of everyday courage and how they relate to self-differentiation.Show Notes:6 Ways to Practice Everyday Courage by Alex BudakBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

09-08
15:03

Episode 346: 6 Ways Self-Differentiation Builds Leadership Courage - Part 1 of 2

Courage is the strength to act in the face of fear, uncertainty, or adversity. This episode covers the first two types of everyday courage and how they relate to self-differentiation.Show Notes:6 Ways to Practice Everyday Courage by Alex BudakBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

09-01
10:47

Episode 345: How to Reduce Resistance to Change

Understanding force field analysis, design thinking and leadership through self-differentiation will help you reduce resistance to change. This episode shows how.Show Notes:Kurt Lewin - WikipediaBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

08-25
13:21

Episode 344: 5 Ways to Assess the Health of Any Relationship System - Part 2 of 2 (Rebroadcast)

The functioning of any relationship system is dependent on the level of self-differentiation among its members. In this two-part episode, I unpack a schema developed by Daniel V. Papero of the Bowen Center for the Study of the Family.Show Notes:Developing a systems model for family assessment. Family Systems: A Journal of Natural Systems Thinking in Psychiatry and the Sciences. 13, 2, 2018 by Daniel V. Papero.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ emails.Become a Patron for as little as $5/month.

08-18
13:26

Episode 343: 5 Ways to Assess the Health of Any Relationship System - Part 1 of 2 (Rebroadcast)

The functioning of any relationship system is dependent on the level of self-differentiation among its members. In this two-part episode, I unpack a schema developed by Daniel V. Papero of the Bowen Center for the Study of the Family.Show Notes:Developing a systems model for family assessment. Family Systems: A Journal of Natural Systems Thinking in Psychiatry and the Sciences. 13, 2, 2018 by Daniel V. Papero.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ emails.Become a Patron for as little as $5/month.

08-11
12:09

Episode 342: Non-Anxious Leaders Embrace Discomfort (Rebroadcast)

According to Edwin Friedman, one of the characteristics of a chronically anxious society is the desire to seek safety instead of adventure. Non-anxious leaders seek adventure and learn to love it. Here’s how.Show Notes:The Light We Carry: Overcoming in Uncertain Times by Michelle ObamaA Failure of Nerve, Revised Edition: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix by Edwin FriedmanBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

08-04
12:33

Episode 341: How to Focus on Emotional Process (and Not Content) (Rebroadcast)

Understanding emotional process helps you to see how people deal with uncertainty and anxiety. This enables you to be less anxious and judgmental, as well as more compassionate. This episode shows you how.Show Notes:The Circle of Why by Kathleen SmithBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

07-28
13:31

Episode 340: Stop Taking Responsibility for Other People's Problems (And Start Delegating Anxiety Instead)

This example from Edwin Friedman's video on leadership through self-differentiation will help you manage anxiety in any relationship system.Show Notes:Leadership Through Self Differentiation A lecture by Edwin Friedman on YouTubeBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

07-21
13:57

Episode 339: Unpacking the Responsibility Triangle (Rebroadcast)

You can’t make another person responsible. If you’re trying, you’re likely doing it wrong. Here’s why and how you can do better.Show Notes:Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue by Edwin FriedmanBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ emails.

07-14
16:00

Episode 338: Assuming You Know What Others Are Thinking Undermines Self-Differentiation

When you manage your anxiety by assuming you know what others are thinking, you often forgo the best possible outcomes.Show Notes:Are You Saying "No" For Others? - by Kathleen Smith Note: this is behind a paywall, but you can subscribe for $5/month (not an affiliate link).Become a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

07-07
11:44

Episode 337: Nobody Likes to Be Told What to Do (Do This Instead)

Understanding the concept of psychological reactance can help you avoid a conflict of wills and increase the chances that people will react positively to your leadership.Show Notes:Rebel with a Cause - Choiceology PodcastBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

06-30
12:45

Episode 336: Four Types of Triangles and How to Manage Them (Rebroadcast)

The triangle is the most stable form of human relationship. Learning to recognize a triangle and how to manage it is essential to being a non-anxious leader.Show Notes:Kathleen Smith, PhD, LPCBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

06-23
14:59

Episode 335: 5 Ways to Lead during a Societal Regression

In A Failure of Nerve, Edwin Friedman maintained that societal regression is counter evolutionary. In this episode, I unpack his five evolutionary principles of life as leadership principles.Show Notes:Become a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

06-16
12:07

Episode 334: Why a Quick Fix Is No Answer (Rebroadcast)

Anxious people want a quick fix. Non-anxious leaders know this is not the answer. Here's why, as well as how you can respond to challenge in a way that will make a difference.Show Notes:How to avoid the most seductive leadership mistake by Ed O'Malley and Julia Fabris McBrideBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

06-09
14:09

Episode 333: What in the World Is Going on Right Now? - Part 2 of 2

This episode explores Murray Bowen's prediction for when we will emerge from the current societal regression, as well as what that will look like.Bonus: a few examples of a self-differentiated leader right now.Show Notes:A Perspective on a World on Fire: Societal Regression by Michael KerrSocietal Emotional Process — The Bowen Center for the Study of the FamilySocietal Anxiety/Regression - The Murray Bowen Archives ProjectBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

06-02
12:54

Episode 332: What in the World Is Going on Right Now? - Part 1 of 2

Murray Bowen's concept of societal regression helps to understand the conflict and division we face in society today. This episode explains what that is and my takeaways on this.Show Notes:Reflections on Societal Regression by Stephanie FerreraA Perspective on a World on Fire: Societal Regression by Michael KerrBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

05-26
10:18

Episode 331: The Mel Robbins' "Let Them Theory" IS Self-Differentiation - Part 3 of 3

This episode covers how Mel Robbins' deals with overfunctioning and the similarities to family systems theory.Show Notes:⁠⁠The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can't Stop Talking About⁠⁠ by Mel Robbins⁠⁠“The Let Them Theory” Book Summary, Chapter-by-Chapter ⁠⁠by Vanessa Van Edwards⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠ for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠⁠⁠Two for Tuesday⁠⁠⁠ email newsletter.

05-19
11:57

Episode 330: The Mel Robbins' "Let Them Theory" IS Self-Differentiation - Part 2 of 3

This episode covers how Mel Robbins' "Let Them Theory" applies to leadership through self-differentiation. Show Notes:⁠The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can't Stop Talking About⁠ by Mel Robbins⁠“The Let Them Theory” Book Summary, Chapter-by-Chapter ⁠by Vanessa Van Edwards⁠Become a Patron⁠ for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠⁠Two for Tuesday⁠⁠ email newsletter.

05-12
12:01

Episode 329: The Mel Robbins "Let Them Theory" IS Self-Differentiation - Part 1 of 3

Mel Robbins doesn't say it, but her Let Them Theory resonates with family systems theory. Here's how.Show Notes:The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can't Stop Talking About by Mel Robbins“The Let Them Theory” Book Summary, Chapter-by-Chapter by Vanessa Van EdwardsBecome a Patron for as little as $5/month.Subscribe to my weekly ⁠Two for Tuesday⁠ email newsletter.

05-05
10:19

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