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The Rising Beyond Podcast

Author: Sybil Cummin, MA, LPC, ACS

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Are you ready to thrive as you are coming out of a toxic or abusive relationship? Join Sybil Cummin, a licensed professional counselor who has specialized in working with victims and survivors of domestic violence and narcissistic abuse for over a decade and runs a membership community for women on their healing journey. On this podcast you will finally feel understood and your experience will be validated as you learn tangible strategies to handle family court, coparent with your abuser, improve your connection with your children, and heal from the trauma of narcissistic abuse and domestic violence.

176 Episodes
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What constitutes moral injury? It is quite possible that you have experienced enough trauma to have symptoms of PTSD after experiencing domestic violence or narcissistic abuse. And it is also possible that this is compounded by something even deeper; the destruction of your moral code. As promised in episode 50, I am doing a deep dive into all things moral injury so that I can help you become unstuck on your healing journey and find self-forgiveness which is required for healing. ...
Don’t sign off on your parenting plan until you have listened to this episode! There may be loopholes that a narcissistic ex-partner will exploit for years to come. Divorcing an abusive ex-partner leads to further abuse, called post-separation abuse, especially if you share children with them. The way our family court system is set up allows abuse to continue and at times actually seems to support the abuse. So, it is imperative that you know what loopholes to look out for ...
Did you grow up learning that you were never good enough? Did it feel normal when your abusive partner started their emotional and psychological abuse in your relationship? Growing up with a narcissistic parent can set you up for unhealthy relationships as an adult. Dr. Praveena specializes in working with adult children of narcissistic parents after her own experiences growing up. In this episode, we discuss how to change the thought patterns that were conditioned in your mind as...
Everyone talks about the escape from domestic violence or a narcissistic relationship. The resources and support are for those trying to escape the abuse. But what if you were not trying to escape? What if the reason you are now separated from your abuser is that you were discarded? In this episode, we look at the differences in support, perception, and reactions after separation from an abusive partner when the victim is discarded vs someone who left on their own volition and tim...
You dream of the day when you can find freedom and safety for yourself and your children. You escape your abusive partner and are ready to start healing. But years later, you are still dealing with the onslaught of abuse; not only from your abuser but from their family as well. This is what my guest, Aimee has been dealing with for the last 13 years. Aimee shares her story of her abusive relationship and the post-separation abuse she has experienced and the near lethal incid...
If you are like many of The Rising Beyond Community members, then your WHY is around keeping your children safe, physically and emotionally. Getting your children the support they need after leaving an abusive relationship with their other parent can feel extremely overwhelming, especially if they have to continue to see that parent without having you as a buffer. Based on my training as a play therapist, I want to share some tips on building your child’s resilience after this transitio...
What questions do you have about post separation abuse? I received many many questions before, during, and after a webinar I did for domesticshelters.org and know that many of you have the same questions. In this episode I will be answering five of the questions received. If you have not left your abuser yet, how can you prepare for post separation abuse? What should we make sure we do? What should we avoid?Do you have some suggestions for safely maintaining boundaries whi...
Did you ever feel the nagging voice of your intuition telling you to get out or to stop a wedding and then ignore it? You had dreams of a happy marriage and children and you were trying to will that into existence even when there were red flags waving in your face? My guest, Amanda Lee knows this all too well. In this week’s episode of The Rising Beyond Podcast, Amanda shares her experience of falling in love with her abuser and getting married even when her gut was telling her to...
If you have just separated from your abusive ex and are facing family court for the first time or if you have been doing this for a while, it is important to have realistic expectations and tangible skills to use as you go through this process. In this episode, you will learn what to expect and how to mitigate the challenges of family court with a high-conflict personality ex-partner before you go to court, during a court hearing and testimony, and then in the aftermath. Some of the top...
Even at your lowest, after experiencing trauma and domestic violence, it is possible to heal and find your purpose. This week’s guest, Misty Chaviers shares her story of abuse and how she was able years later to heal and find her purpose as an advocate and podcaster helping other victims. She is vulnerable and shares how she used drugs and alcohol and eating disorder behaviors as a way to cope with the pain. We discuss how important it is for professionals working in this ...
Does witnessing domestic violence in your family of origin have effects on your relationships in adulthood? My guest, Lovern Gordon shares her experiences of witnessing her father abuse her mother during her childhood and how this affected her self-worth and identity and led her into becoming a victim of domestic violence later in life. We discuss the misconception that we could pick out an abusive person by how they look and about the mask they wear for the outside world. ...
You get to that point in your relationship where you know you can no longer live with the control and abuse. You separate from your abuser and are left to pick up the pieces. Now what? How do I recover from this? Where do I even start the healing process? In this episode of The Rising Beyond Podcast, I have a conversation with Leanne Kanzler, a psychologist and coach on how she helps women and men who have separated from an abusive and controlling partner get back on their f...
In this week’s Friday Coaching Corner, I respond to a listener who’s six years post–custody loss and doing her best to stay connected with her teen daughter—while being accused of crossing boundaries and “embarrassing” her. This mom wonders: “Am I doing okay? Or am I being walked over by my child and my ex?” It’s a question many protective parents ask themselves when trying to balance compassion, boundaries, and the constant pressure to appear “perfect” under the court’s microscope. In this e...
Walking into family court is intimidating enough — and then your ex smirks, rolls their eyes, or drops a lie designed to rattle you. On top of that, opposing counsel may throw you questions that feel like traps or come out of nowhere. In this episode, Sybil breaks down how to keep your composure in court when your ex tries to provoke you, and how to handle curveball questions during cross-examination. You’ll learn: Why abusers use provocation in court and how judges often notice your reaction...
Family court is often the last place survivors expect to or actually find safety, yet for so many, it’s where their battle continues. What if we could do something to change that? I’m talking with Jill Montes and Dr. Ramona Probasco from the Healing While Living Free Foundation to talk about the systemic failures of family court, why survivors often lose their voice in the process, and what can actually be done to shift things, starting with training attorneys. Together, we dive into: Why fam...
In this week’s Friday Coaching Corner, I respond to a heartbreaking listener story that highlights just how overwhelming it can feel to keep fighting for your child when the family court system and even your own attorney seem to be standing in the way. This listener’s ex-partner is refusing to comply with the court order requiring their child to participate in family therapy, therapy that could be covered by Medicaid, while continuing to manipulate both the child and the process. The result i...
What happens when you bring a passionate male advocate for survivors of domestic violence into a space that’s usually led by women? That’s what we're doing in this episode! I talk with Michael, a rare but powerful male voice in this movement, to talk about the complexities of abuse, how children really experience it, and what it looks like for men to step into prevention and healing work. Together, we cover: An unexpected start: How a “mess around job” at a domestic violence shelter shifted M...
When it comes to domestic violence and coercive control, the systems we rely on to protect children are often looking at the wrong thing. Instead of assessing for patterns like, long-term, consistent dynamics of fear, control, and power imbalances, many custody decisions are still made based on isolated incidents. And that’s a huge problem. In this solo episode, I’m sharing why we need a major shift in how we assess safety, parenting, attachment, and the best interests of the child, and how a...
After years of surviving post-separation abuse and high-conflict co-parenting, you may find yourself disconnected from your older teen or adult child. Maybe they’re distant. Maybe they believe things about you that aren’t true. Or maybe they just don’t seem to want a relationship anymore. It can be heartbreaking. Listen for ideas on how to begin rebuilding a stronger, more grounded connection with teenager or adult child, even when the path feels uncertain. We cover: The emotional and develop...
One of the most horrific and insidious consequences of coercive control and dv is the systematic way in which an abuser strips away their victim’s sense of self and identity. One of the most impactful parts of the healing process is rebuilding that connection with the self and redefining your roles and identities. On this episode, I invited my friend and colleague, Erin Siegel to share how the framework of Human Design has been pivotal as she heals from her abuse and continued post sepa...
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