The Second Circle

She’s spent the last six months talking to people about the low points in their sex lives. Now, heavily pregnant, Franki’s struggling to find the spark herself. Could listening to audio porn be the solution? She grabs her headphones to find out.The Second Circle is produced, written, and hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka TateTheme music: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Incidental music: _91Nova - Moiety, Maybe - The Universe is a Bitch, _91Nova - Shell GamesAll music courtesy of epidemicsound.comAudio porn clips:“Don’t Be Late” written and read by Euphemise This “Free Use Secretary” written and read by Girl On The Net “E-stim” written and read by Jenby Doll“Sat On His Face” written by David of The Big Gay Review and read by LukeAll audioporn courtesy of girlonthenet.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexbonusSupport the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Whether it’s with our friends or, more crucially, with our partners, sex IS something we need to be able to communicate about if we want it to be good. But it’s so hard! Why? Because for all the other messages we get around sex, all the things we’re taught or that we glean from our culture or the media… no one tells us how to talk about it.The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka Tate Title track: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Background music: _91Nova - Moiety / From Now On - Small Circuits / Lasae Lyx - Suffering In Paradise / Blaeker - Stay Up All NightAll music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexE06Support the show (https://ko-fi.com/frankicookney) Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Somewhere along the way we’ve been taught that desire should just exist without any conscious effort, like hunger or thirst. And if it doesn’t – uh oh – that means something is wrong. But this idea of sex as a “drive” is actually a myth. And like so many myths, it’s standing in the way of us having good, fulfilling sex lives. The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka Tate Title track: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Background music: From Now On - Small Circuits / Beautiful Minds - Brighter Than Tomorrow / Maybe - The Universe is a Bitch All music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexE05Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Faulty penises, unruly pubes, and unexplained pain: When our bodies don’t look or work the way they’re “supposed” to, it can feel like a real barrier to good sex. So what can we do about it? Do we push on through anyway? Seek treatment? Or adjust our expectations? The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka Tate Title track: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Background music: _91Nova - Moiety / Tilden Parc - Wanna KnowAll music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexE04Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

One in eight women and one in twenty men say they lack enjoyment during sex.For all the conflicting messages we get around sex, most of us know that on some level we’re supposed to enjoy it. But there are a lot of things that can stand in our way. The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka Tate Title track: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Background music: Tilden Parc -  Wanna Know /  Moon Craters - A Spinning Earth / Maybe - The Universe is a BitchAll music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexE03Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Where do we learn about sex?  Who do we learn it from? What do those people and establishments actually tell us… about what sex IS and what it’s supposed to mean? And is it possible… is it possible…  that some of what we’re being told might be directly contributing to our experiences of bad sex?The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka TateTitle track: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Background music:  Lasae Lyx -  Suffering In Paradise /  From Now On - Small CircuitsAll music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexE02Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

While plenty of us still grow up in families and communities where sex is taboo or there are strict rules around it, on a broader societal level here in Western Europe it’s fair to say sex is no longer seen as sinful. Sex is good, it’s healthy, it’s normal, it’s empowering!We’re living in this lovely, glossy, horny world where we’re told that good sex is not just our aim, goddammit, it’s our right… so what gives?The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka TateTitle track: Roof - Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)Background music:  _91Nova - Shell Games / Blaeker - Stay Up All Night /  _91Nova - MoietyAll music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comTranscript: https://bit.ly/badsexE01Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Awkward. Dissatisfying. Painful. Shameful. Disappointing. Miserable. Or just a bit… meh.The Second Circle is back with a NEW series looking at the type of sex we’ve definitely all experienced: bad sex.Combining in-depth reporting with real life stories, BAD SEX takes listeners on a journey through the less desirable side of sex: from dissatisfying hookups, to sexual dysfunction, body image issues, and shame. Forget hot tips and kinky tricks. In this six-part series, journalist Franki Cookney turns sex advice on its head and asks: what makes sex bad in the first place?The Second Circle is produced, written, hosted by Franki CookneyAudio production: Anouszka TateTitle track: Roof /  Big Spoon (Instrumental Version)All music courtesy of www.epidemicsound.comSupport the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.This week Franki talks to bisexual polyamorous woman L about opening up her marriage and managing multiple relationships. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex, Frankie Wells and Anouszka Tate of sex podcast Project Pleasure tell us how some of their best and worst sexual experiences shaped them.In the intro Rob and Franki also talked about the BBC drama Wanderlust as well as Louis Theroux’s documentary about polyamory, Love Without Limits. L and Franki referenced research which shoes that polyamorous people tend to practice safer sex and also mentioned the book Enjoy Sex: How, when, and if you want to by Meg-John Barker and Justin Hancock.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.This week Franki talks to filmmaker and porn performer Rooster about the difference between fucking on and off screen. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex Cosmpolitan journalist Paisley Gilmour realises that even when you write about sex and consent for a living, it doesn’t mean you always recognise when someone oversteps your own boundaries.In our intro to this episode we also discuss this recent story of how fewer films are being given an 18 certificate beacause of their sexual content.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.In episode seven, Franki talks to sex educator Ruby Stevenson about why wanking gets a bad rap and whether masturbation it could ever be considered as important as partnered sex. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex we hear how a disappointing sexual encounter turned out to have unexpected benefits for Rory.To enter the competition to win a Womanizer Premium please tweet us @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com and tell us what wanking advice you’d give your younger self.In discussing Rory’s pigeon story, we talk about the rates of erectile dysfunction among young men. We also point out that almost half of men in their 30s report having trouble getting hard at times (and that this is NOT the same as erectile dysfunction) and that this can be for a number of reasons, as outlined here.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.On this episode Franki talks to trans activist and all-round kinkster Alyssa Henley about her experiences with sex and gender identity. And in The Overthinkers Guide To Sex, we hear how alcohol shaped Africa Brooke‘s relationship with sex and how she went about relearning how to connect with her body now that she’s sober. Download on your favourite podcast app now.Alyssa is the CEO of LGBTQ charity Support U in Reading.In discussing Africa’s story, we mention a study by University College London which found that the proportion of 16 to 24-year-olds who do not drink alcohol has increased. But we also point this this recent Atlantic article that said that actually not that many people have quit altogether.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.On this episode Franki talks to sex and libido blogger Laura about her experiences with low sex drive. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex we hear from disabled sex writer Finn about how a period of singleness taught them more about what they want from sex and relationships than being coupled up.We also reference Franki’s article on whether the pressure to be “sex positive” can sometimes have negative effects. We shout out Esther Perel’s podcast episode on “sexlessness” as well as her writing on sexual desire in long term relationships. We also recommend The Apple Tree in London for all your queer and alternative lifestyle events.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.Franki talks to sex worker and co-curator of Objects of Desire Rory about having sex for money and what kinds of stories get left out of conversations about sex work. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex, we hear how a university hookup made Heather re-evaluate her approach to kink.We also discuss the ways sex work gets talked about in the mainstream media. We talk about Amnesty International’s policy on protecting sex worker rights and the backlash it faced as a result. We touch on the damage done by SESTA-FOSTA, mention the Decrim Now movement and recommend the book Revolting Prostitutes as a starting point for anyone interested in the subject of sex work and decriminalisation.Objects of Desire runs at the Schwules Museum in Berlin until 01 June 2019.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.On this episode Franki talks to writer Sangeeta Pillai about the stigma and stereotypes around sex when you’re a South Asian woman. Sangeeta is the founder of Soul Sutras and creator of The Masala Monologues as well as the forthcoming Masala Podcast. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex we hear from sex blogger Exhibit A about how an sexy encounter with a Canadian couple allowed him to tap into previously unrealised desires.We also discuss the ways in which South Asian sexuality gets represented in the mainstream media (spoiler: it doesn’t!) and how, while reporting on human rights issues in other parts of the world is important, it’s also really crucial we hear the individual stories as well.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.On episode two of series three Franki talks to filmmaker and visual artist Simon Eves about his experience living – and fucking – with HIV. In The Overthinkers Guide To Sex we hear from Genie, the host of kinky swingers club Future Parties, about how a long-term affair changed her whole outlook on sex and relationships.We also discuss the ways mainstream media HIV coverage has changed over the years, including the positives such as this story and the negatives such as the framing of PrEP as a “promiscuity pill” by the Mail.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to The Second Circle. A sex podcast for overthinkers.On the first episode of series three Franki talks to queer disabled writer and sex worker Ms Eve Adler about her experience of sex with disability. We also hear from sex blogger Girl On The Net in our brand new section The Overthinkers Guide To Sex.We also discuss the ways sex and disability get talked about in the mainstream media, drawing on personal essays such as this one by journalist Hollie Anne Brooks and YouTuber and sex educator Hannah Witton’s story of sex with a stoma.We reference the work of disabled photographer Robert Coombs and give a shout out to Andrew Gurza’s #disabledpeoplearehot Twitter campaign.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast produced and hosted by journalist Franki Cookney. It seeks to bring some (okay, a LOT) of the nuance back into discussions of sex, relationships, and gender and challenges the idea that sex doesn’t deserve the same thought and attention that we give to the rest of our lives.Series 3 of The Second Circle is supported by That’s The Spot.Get in touch on Twitter @The2ndCircle or email us secondcirclepodcast@gmail.com.If you’re enjoying the podcast, please visit the Patreon page to find out more about how you can support sex-positive content AND get rewarded for your loyalty! Or if you just want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

October was a depressing month for sex news but we managed to dig out a few rays of hope in the form of a new type of condom. We discuss the consultation on the Gender Recognition Act, dodgy biscuits and the appointment of Brett Kavanagh to the US Supreme Court. Then Franki sits down with porn performer Lina Bembe to talk about the ethics of porn (both producers and viewers!) and also how the heck you have an orgasm “by accident”.LINKSThis RightsInfo feature has a good breakdown of the legal rights being discussed and fought for in the debate around the Gender Recognition Act.You can find out all about the self-lubricating condom here (although you’ll have to wait for Franki’s thrust report!)Lina recommended us some fantastic ethical porn sites. If you’re interested you can check them out here:Bright DesireErika LustBlue Artichoke FilmsPink LabelWe also talked about Four Chambers and not forgetting Ersties themselves! You can hear Lina and her colleagues on the Ersties Podcast here.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast hosted by Franki Cookney. Get in touch @The2ndCircle or via our contact page. If you enjoyed the show today and want to low-key share the love, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

With London Pride just around the corner, Franki wonders whether she will ever feel “queer enough” to join the parade. As a straight-passing bisexual person, it’s easy to feel as though you don’t really belong… after all, you may not have experienced the same marginalisation as the rest of the LGBTQ community. So where does your identity fit in? Welcome to The Second Circle’s Solo Sessions, shorter, more intimate, episodes in which Franki ponders a question or shares a dilemma that’s been on her mind.My friends made a film with Pink News about bisexuality, bi visibility and the ways in which bi people have their sexual identities “erased” by others. You can watch it here.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast hosted by Franki Cookney. Get in touch @The2ndCircle or via our contact page. If you’re enjoying the podcast, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There’s a lot of vagina news this week including a discussion about summer vaginas… so we ask what a summer penis might look like. Franki interviewed sex and relationships therapist Dr Lori Beth Bisbey about how sexuality develops and changes throughout our lives and Rob has a lot of thoughts about that. Plus, we have a look at a question about polyamory and have a go at unpicking it ourselves.LINKSThis Teen Vogue piece about “summer vaginas” has come in for a lot of flak, not least from a canadian gynaecologist who has debunked its claims.The Mail Online says this woman is calling for designer vaginas to be available on the NHS but she’s not actually talking about aesthetics at all, she’s talking about curing incontinence and boosting sexual pleasure for women which seems pretty worthwhile.This week Rob stole an Everyday Sex question from The Guardian’s sex column. It was about polyamory and monogamy.The Second Circle is a sex and gender politics podcast hosted by Franki Cookney. Get in touch @The2ndCircle or via our contact page. If you enjoyed the show today, why not buy me a coffee?Support the Show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.