The Sorting Chat — A Harry Potter Podcast

Hello, and welcome back to this Harry Potter Podcast that can't get its life together! We're back after another long absence, and this time we're bringing you something different. Lauren, Dayle and Cherie all sat down at Lauren's house and recorded in the same room for the first time ever. That being the case, we decided to try something new: a HP-themed tabletop RPG! Listen as we stumble through what is essentially fanfic being created in real time! Listen also as both the Game Master and the Players refuse to do character voices! Listen as we bend canon to suit our own needs! We had a great time — this doesn't necessarily generate a good podcast, but we hope you'll come along with us and enjoy our adventure. It's really the least you can do. Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello friends, and welcome back to this podcast that really tries to be about Harry Potter — I promise, folks, we really try. Listen as we start with what we consider to be a very solid premise — JK Rowling and authorial intent — and devolve very swiftly into talking about jeans, pajama jeans, other types of pants and vaping. After our absence, we were getting used to the whole "oh yeah, this is a podcast" thing, and so the episode is much shorter than usual. We'll get the hang of it again soon, I'm sure. Or we won't, I'm not a fortune teller. [CW: discussion of childbirth injury, 2:40–3:05] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello, and welcome to the very late 21st episode of this supposedly Harry Potter podcast! Forces of nature have kept one of us down — but not out — and our dear Dayle returns to us after the destruction wrought by Hurricane Michael in October. Now that she is safe and sound, we return to our regularly scheduled pattern of talking like no one is listening. Which is to say: come with us as we discuss the recently released “Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald” and get lost deep in the weeds trying to reconstruct when and who and where and why everything ever was in the Harry Potter universe. Also, Cherie thinks one of the characters’ names is Travis, and we riff on that for way too long. Reunited, and it feels so good! [CW: Natural disasters, genocide] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zich Steadman, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello, and welcome to the "best" Harry Potter podcast with the worst audio! We've got a little bit of everything for you in this one — except for Dayle, who was out sick. (#wandsoutfordayle) It's just Cherie and Lauren this time, talking about The Hogwarts Express and general boarding school transportation, lamenting "The Cursed Child" (again) and eventually devolving into punch-crunk conversation about Season 3 of "The Surreal Life" and our love for Brigitte Nielsen. It's what all the hep cats are talkin' about in 2018!  Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello, friends and lovers! Welcome to this very, very late episode. Join us as we try to answer listener questions, and get sidetracked by snakes and soccer! Also, Lauren's daughter Lucy interrupts several times until we decide to invite her to talk to us, at which point she clams up faster than that frog from the Bugs Bunny cartoons. Kids! They love to troll! Thanks to listener Katie for bearing with us and for being kind about our ignorant assumptions about the British. It's the American Way! [CW: Heavy discussion of mental illness] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hey everybody, it's us! We're back, and ready to talk about Harry Potter! In between talking about makeup and lovingly criticizing our friends and family for their shortcomings! Listen as we discuss the dynamics of couples with both magical and non-magical partners, ghosts and wizard sex! Listen also as we are plagued by technical difficulties, turning this episode into a narrative disaster! It's our very own Cursed Episode! If you listen to it, you'll be dead in 7 days! It's good fun! [CW: murder, mental illness, sex] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello, and welcome back to the OTP — the One True Podcast about Harry Potter! Or so we have said. This time, we were missing our dear Dayle, but stepping into her shoes is the indomitable Dr. Saulter, who is both a mental health professional and a mother of Cherie! We spend a while talking about the Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery game, before moving onto using Dr. Saulter's expertise to try and diagnose the mental health of all our favorite characters. Meanwhile, Lauren and Cherie both remember that a mom is present and neither one of us do a cuss. It sure is a hoot! Come on and give it a listen. [CW: incarceration, mental illness, abuse] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Welcome back to this Harry Potter podcast that has no regard for structure or even really being entertaining! On this month's episode, we chat with guest John — and his alter-ego Charlaine — ostensibly about wizard drugs, but eventually leading to Lauren just reading the titles of Chuck Tingle novels aloud and saying sex stuff. It's great material, everybody, you should really get in on this. [CW: Discussion of substance abuse, sex work, erotica, mention of nonconsent] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello and welcome again to this podcast, where we do Harry Potter stuff most of the time. Join us as we welcome our first repeat guest, our best friend for as long as we feel like it, Leah! We asked her, a confirmed Hufflepuff, to join the rest of us three — each a Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Slytherin — in talking about our respective houses and their characteristics. We start off with a little talk about some recent Twitter drama concerning the March for Our Lives, continue on with the house convo and eventually end up just talking about ourselves and how much we like each other. It's really riveting internet stuff! Get out of our dreams, listeners, and get into our podcast. Get in the backseat, babies! [CW: Discussion of gun violence] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hey cool dudes, and welcome to the One Harry Potter Podcast that can't decide if it wants to be funny or contemplative — and ends up being neither! Come with us as we intend to talk about HP, immediately veer into talking about cute animals we saw online, try to rein it back in and end up reading the Harry Potter Wikia to you. Then, we go light on laughs — and long on ... lambasting? — as we discuss a couple of times Our Lady of Fantasy Fiction, JK Rowling, got herself into hot water, and how she responded to it. Sound like your cup of tea? Then click that li'l play button and get you some. Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello again, and welcome to another episode of the Harry Potter show that just won't quit — except when it does, eventually. In this episode, Dayle was out sick (#rememberDayle #RIPDayle) but will return resplendent for our next foray. In her place is The Sorting Chat superfan, Lauren's brother-in-law Ian! And also Lauren's sister Hayley, who tolerates us all. We're discussing The Sorting at Hogwarts, The Houses, and The Lighting of Juvenile Fires In Yards. This episode also includes the finest fan fiction work our Cherie has ever produced; she is truly the brightest fan fiction composer of her age. Come on in and do the dang thing with us.  [CW: light mention of physical abuse] Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.  

Bonjour dudes, and welcome back to this podcast where adults talk about Harry Potter and other things with a startling lack of clarity! We are back from our holiday hiatus, and — look, we've done our best here. We took suggestions from a few listeners and from our own brains for discussion topics, threw them into a hat and pulled some out at random. What follows is just shy of 45 minutes of listing things and trying to sing in sync over webchat. Two thirds of us were under the weather and the other one had just gotten off an airplane, so it's just as good as you might expect in those circumstances. So have a listen, and let us Slytherin (ugh) to your ears and your hearts. Web: thesortingchat.com Email: thesortingchat@gmail.com Facebook: facebook.com/thesortingchat Twitter: @thesortingchat Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Happy Holiday times and welcome to another episode of our occasional sub-podcast, The Third Floor Corridor, where we veer wildly off course to talk about something that is not Harry Potter. In this very merry 'sode, we talk about everybody's favorite film franchise about an aspiring young sociopath, "Home Alone." We will cover some of the bases, leave others entirely unexplored and maybe even slip in a little Potter talk with us. Merry Christmas, you filthy animals! Visit us at www.thesortingchat.com and send us all your steamiest Kevin/Malfoy fanfic at thesortingchat@gmail.com or facebook.com/thesortingchat. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed this holiday rendition of "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello everyone, and welcome back to the only Harry Potter Podcast produced by people who would definitely get on your nerves in a bar. This week — despite the misleading title — we'll be talking about everybody's (least?) favorite bad boy, Draco Carl Malfoy. And, of course, we'll also spend a prodigious amount of time talking about other things: horse girls, Amy Grant, HP/OW fan fiction. And So. Much. LESS. So strap in and do the dang thing with us! Visit us at www.thesortingchat.com and send us all your favorite fan art of shirtless Slytherins at thesortingchat@gmail.com or facebook.com/thesortingchat. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hey guys! A brand new episode has come down the pike for you — and what a doozy. This time, we spend a while trying to talk about privilege in the Wizarding World and Hogwarts pedagogy, before eventually spending the rest of our time making up Harry Potter fan fiction based on pop songs. It's a pre-Thanksgiving miracle! Visit us at www.thesortingchat.com and send us all your favorite Evanescence lyrics at thesortingchat@gmail.com or facebook.com/thesortingchat. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello, and welcome to the inaugural episode of The Sorting Chat's sub-podcast, The Third Floor Corridor, where we very occasionally will veer dangerously off-track and talk about things that are not Harry Potter. In this episode, we're talking about Stranger Things, mainly season 2, in the way that only we can: in long strings of uninterrupted stream-of-consciousness. Listen as we spend at least 20 minutes gushing and complaining, and then spend basically the rest of our time playing a protracted game of "Who'd You Rather?" (Spoiler alert: we're randy for just about everybody on this show.) So grab your Eggos and have a li'l listen.  Let us know if you liked this off-topic adventure, and let us know what other things you might like to hear about in the future at thesortingchat@gmail.com or www.facebook.com/thesortingchat. If you didn't like it, keep it to yourself, we don't need that drama. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who did a heck of a job translating our regular theme into something spookier and, dare we say it, stranger? He's at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music

Happy Harry-ween, everyfolk! Here's our sixth mini-sode, wherein we talk about wizard fine dining, wizard Halloween costumes and that age-old question: is Harry Potter a subject of The Queen? Inquiring minds want to know! And we give them very, very unsatisfactory answers. That's just what we're into here at The Sorting Chat! This episode's title came from listener Stephanie, who had the most votes in our "generate a HP title with your dang auto-fill" contest. Please share your thoughts and favorite laundromats with us at thesortingchat@gmail.com or at www.facebook.com/thesortingchat. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Welcome back to your only source for online Harry Potter tomfoolery commentary that I know of at this time! We're talking about the wizarding legal and criminal justice system, as only three people who are relatively uninformed on such a topic can! We also talk about a few other things here and there, just to pull the ol' switcheroo on ya. So come, enjoy yourselves on this especially heinous ride! Please share your thoughts and Harry Potter/Law and Order crossover fan fiction with us at thesortingchat@gmail.com or at www.facebook.com/thesortingchat. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.

Hello people friends — and other friends? — and welcome to a new minisode. We're talking about squibs, the Harry Potter Universe's most unfortunate souls, and what kind of jobs they might do. (Thanks, superfan Jordan Haggerty, for reminding us that squibs exist and getting this talk-ball rolling.) We then catch that slammin' tangent wave into discussing theme park rides and our ideal Wizarding World attractions. Ride this wave with us, friends. Ride it all the way home.

Welcome, friends, to another of these things we keep doing. In this episode, Cherie, Dayle and Lauren make the case that Mary Poppins is a witch, continue stalking another similarly-named Harry Potter podcast, and come to a startling revelation about Lauren's true feelings about Molly Weasley. How can we serve you? It's our pleasure! Please share your thoughts with us about turn of the century chimney sweeps at thesortingchat@gmail.com or at www.facebook.com/thesortingchat. Thanks as always to Zach Stidham, who composed "The Sorting Chat Theme." Find him at zachstidham.bandcamp.com or on Instagram @zach.stidham.music.