“It’s a new phenomenon for me in my mid-30s, to worry that I’ll wake up one day and wonder where time has gone. Will I feel like I did what I wanted? Lived my life the way that I want? How can we actually make it feel like life is slowing down?”
When kids get their own activities, our culture doesn't paint a pretty picture for parents - we become at best cheerleaders, at worst chauffeurs. I'm actually afraid of this development.
In the second episode in our #chooseslow series, we tackle a particular moment of life that seems like it should be our opportunity, but so often rushes by in a blur: THE WEEKEND.
“Yes, this does require some thought, and design, and reflection… Aha! All things we don’t have time to do if we don’t slow down in the first place. It’s a bit of a chicken and egg sort of situation.” - Lindsay Sommerauer
We know routine is important for kids, but so is adaptability… how do we perform this dance as the people leading and designing the overall flow of life?
“Is it the result of too much consumer choice and information overload as the default mode of being that makes us feel every decision has so much weight now?”
“This can be really demoralizing, if you’re someone who likes research, because no matter how much you do, you’ll never know that you really made the right decision, because you’ll never see a parallel life.”
“Parenting is essentially life teaching… you’re just teaching another person how to do all of life.”
The goal is to move from competition/comparison of self-time to connection and collaboration on a life that you both want, together and individually.
Today on The Wayfinders Podcast, we’re tackling the obstacles we face and coming up with some creative solutions and helpful resources that might help us get to the point where time for ourselves is just a GIVEN.
“Me time ends up feeling like borrowed time, which is never refreshing.” - Lindsay Sommerauer
“There’s a lot of fear when you’re becoming a parent that it is an identity takeover, that you’re going to be overwhelmed and you’re not going to be up to the challenge… and the Hot Mess stereotype validates that and says, ‘yep, you’re not going to have your shit together, and you’re going to be kind of a bumbling idiot all the time.’”
Guilt doesn’t help anyone - so what’s it trying to tell us? And how can we move forward from it?
The big changes we want in our lives/relationships/parenting need a lot more time than we have in our everyday lives - so what CAN we do, right now?
It’s one thing to let go of judgments, and it’s another to gain confidence in our own way forward. So how do we do it?
It can feel like judgment is everywhere - so how can we shake that heavy feeling so we can move on to something lighter, better, more joyful?
Parenthood is an experience we can’t quite imagine before it happens, and there are a lot of expectations about how we ‘should’ experience it. What happens when the reality doesn’t align with those expectations?