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This F***ing Guy!

Author: Ren Martinez and Ginger Golub

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A podcast about self-care, because sometimes self-care is screaming into the void. Here is where we use expletives and alcohol to emotionally process the weird and ridiculous things that compose the terrible elevator music of our lives.

This podcast is for the purpose of commentary, critique, parody, reviews, and satire. See more at thisfnguypod.com.
91 Episodes
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A reckoning, a renaming, and a revival! Coming to your ears very soon! More at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ginger talks about Dan Quayle, the most boring man that is still alive, even if he was vice president at one point. Between blaming the L.A. riots on a television show and his many uses of prepositions, we will explore how Dan Quayle is sometimes technically correct, George H. gave him a puppy to teach him about responsibility, and him becoming the hero we didn't know we needed. Featuring the Hard Rock of states, the university of Peepaw, and the reveal of the TFNG motto. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ren unveils another right-wing provocateur who decries censorship while being able to publish a book. Laura Loomer is many things and she is not good at any of them. From political punkings, to fake documentaries, to being banned from multiple internet platforms, including Teespring somehow, Laura has made quite the name for herself as a #ProudIslamophobe and "The Most Banned Woman on the Internet." Featuring embarrassing stories about Ginger's mom, what kind of dogs are LoTR characters, and how Ren's husband personally ruined Halloween. In memory of Karen, a good pupper who would like to speak to your manager. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ginger dips into true crime, where racism and murder fantasy meet! Bernie Goetz, an average white dude who looks like a bad Jeffrey Dahmer spin-off, was dubbed the Subway Vigilante for gunning down four teenage black boys and running away to New Hampshire for awhile. You know, like innocent people do. The fact that we got the Joker movie out of this is somehow not the worst part. Featuring the great soup and sandwich debate, New York City's knife economy, and Ren struggling with Billy Joel lyrics. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, we dive into the breaking news and discuss Syesha Mercado and her continuing battle to regain custody of her children. In a story that involves a struggling child welfare system, rampant abuse, and an overzealous doctor destroying families, we'll discover that the true villain was Florida all along. Featuring juggling chainsaws, Master Chef Junior Junior, and how Mariska Hargitay can change the world. Citations at thisfnguypod.com. CW: child abuse, suicide
On a special bonus-type episode, Ren and Ginger introduce what will be a Patreon exclusive: exploring the wonderful Reddit space that is "Am I The Asshole." This is where the people come to ask the anonymous masses about whether they have offended their fellow man. But beware, it is the internet, so it's gonna get weird. Featuring radioactive cockroaches, cheating on your spouse via bento box, and Eustace the pig. See more at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ren takes us all on what may be the wildest ride yet. We're talking Steven Seagal, action hero, cringy weeb, and utter monster. It's like one of those bad jokes: a former action star wearing a bulletproof kimono walks into the bar, fakes a Jamaican accent, and tries to give all the women unwanted massages while negging them about their weak kidneys. The punchline? Well, it somehow involves a tank, a puppy, and Sheriff Joe Arpaio. Featuring Ginger's recent doctor's visit, couch guns, and a call from Ren's mom. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ginger talks about the Hostess with the Most-ess who never learned how to tie her shoes. Dolley Madison was considered the First of the First Ladies, but that's because our grade school history classes glossed over all of the slave-owning and disregard for human dignity. Hello, Dolley! You're the worst, Dolley! Featuring morbid old-timey shit, dick pics in space, and Ginger's confession that she is not a My Chemical Romance fan. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, we discuss the worst (and ugliest) U.S. president: James Buchanan. A man who saw the Civil War on the horizon and responded, "Meh, that is someone else's problem." A masterclass in pettiness, pissing off your own political party, and other lessons that America has clearly learned. Featuring Alanis Morrissette, a Queer as Folk remake starring 1860s political figures, and more Calls from Craigslist. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ren shares America's newest record for 2021: the most anti-trans bills ever introduced to state legislatures! From attempts to keep trans kids from playing kickball to keeping them from getting healthcare to forcing teachers to out them to their parents, it's like an all-you-can-eat buffet but entirely made of transphobia. They're just trying to protect the children, y'all! Featuring calls from Craigslist, the worst sandwich ever conceived, and the timeless question: are horses racist? Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, we celebrate Pride Month by remembering why cops aren't allowed at Pride. Ginger takes us back to the 1960's, a time of peace, love, and rampant discrimination against LGBT+ folks. All it took was one sh**ty dive bar, a police raid, and a couple of trans women of color who decided that they had had enough. Featuring pizzazz, bad segways, and how Tom Hanks got cancelled. Citations at thisfnguypod.com. 
On this episode, Ginger tells Ren a tale as old as time: about a 6-foot-tall religious lady in the early 1900s taking a hatchet to your local pub. Carry A. Nation was a prohibitionist but without any chill whatsoever, and we thank her wholeheartedly for that. Featuring Goosy Joss, braising politicians, and faking your own death to escape social blunders. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, we delve into the constitutional fanfiction that is sovereign citizens. Unfortunately, nonsense jargon, legal mad libs, and wacky hijinks are the ridiculous wrapping paper on a truly terrible gift: antisemitism, white supremacy, and domestic terrorism. Featuring bad star wars metaphors, a fire in Ginger's ovaries, and John Cena, the man, the meme, the legend. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ginger tries to squeeze a 12-part PBS docuseries into just one podcast episode. From slave patrols to strike breakers to corrupt political machines to outright violence, the history of American policing proves the old adage: what we learn from history is that no one learns from history. Featuring delivery pizza, more musical numbers, and a debate on what whiteness smells like. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ginger talks about magnets, magnetism, and Franz Mesmer, a man kicked out of Paris for being a pervert. Actually, it was the fact that his medical practice mostly consisted of getting stoned and feeling up ladies, but you get the gist. Add in Marie Antoinette, Amadeus Mozart, and Ben Franklin, and you got a recipe of what we like to call: history is weirder and hornier than you thought. Featuring racist gremlin, Ben Shapiro, wandering uteri, and DJ's Tinder profile. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ren decides to celebrate Autism Awareness month by talking about a group that hates autistic people, but, don't worry, that feeling is mutual. Autism Speaks is known for the blue puzzle piece, being obsessed with curing autism, and producing films that make autism out to be the bubonic plague and the Zodiac Killer combined. Ableism: the true conspiracy theorist. Featuring the penultimate verse of Mr. Brightside, the menacing aura of the Duolingo owl, and grown men being upset about Disney World. Citations at thisfnguypod.com
On this episode, Ginger recalls two wars humans declared on birds and subsequently lost. First, the Emu Wars of Australia, where the military sent two machine guns to wipe out 20,000 birds the size of Tom Cruise with the same energy. And, like a real life cartoon, it goes about the way you expect. Second, the time when Maoist China declared war on sparrows, took it way to seriously, and millions died from starvation. Basically, the moral of the story is don't f*** with birds. Featuring the benefits of buying secondhand birds, Ren's lifelong feud with a parrot, and the odds of Ginger winning in a fistfight with an infant. Bonus: DJ and DJ Sr. making way too much noise. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ren and Ginger wonder aloud if the best part of waking up is fascism in your cup. Black Rifle Coffee Company is supposed to sell coffee, but what they really sell is "owning the libs" to guys whose entire personality is "GUNS!" Unfortunately, when you package your product in American flags and assault weapons in order to cater to military LARPers and right-wingers, the other circle in this already terrible Venn Diagram includes mass shooters and Nazis. Triggered, yet? Featuring Matt Gaetz federal sex trafficking takes, whether doing cocaine is too gay, and yet another term Ginger has to explain to her dad. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
On this episode, Ginger returns to her roots: true crime, bad science, and sexual predators. We're talking about Richard Gardner, child psychiatrist and man who was definitely subscribed to TheRedPill on Reddit, whose name was recently dropped in HBO's "Allen V. Farrow" docuseries. Gardner was the brain behind "Parental Alienation Syndrome," a thing that is definitely not real but still managed to use in order to ruin lives for decades. This is definitely a Vodka Cranberry (hold the Cranberry) kind of episode. Featuring Ren's new favorite serotonin-boosting TV show, Destiel becoming canon, and the eternal reminder to stop comparing your hurt feelings to the Holocaust. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.  CW: child physical and sexual abuse, domestic violence, divorce, suicide, misogyny
On this episode, Ginger discusses another historic inventor who was weirder (and worse) than you thought. Alexander Graham Bell is well known as an American icon for his invention of the telephone, despite the fact that he was Scottish and lived mostly in Canada. What's less known is his party trick of fisting his dog's mouth, dating and marrying his teenage student, and--oh yeah--all the ableism and eugenics. Happy Deaf History Month! Featuring a Monty Python reference, the ethics of masturbating to Space Jam, and the revelation that Ren and Ginger don't know anything about President James A. Garfield. Citations at thisfnguypod.com.
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