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Toasted Fiction Theatre

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Podcast by Christopher Patrick | Toasted Fiction Theatre is a brand new audio series of short plays and stories created by Christopher Patrick. Each month, Toasted Fiction Theatre will release a new episode that features new writing from writers throughout Scotland.
26 Episodes
Toasted Fiction Theatre is a brand new audio series of short plays and stories created by writer/director Christopher Patrick.Each month, Toasted Fiction Theatre will release a new episode that features new writing from writers throughout Scotland and the rest of the UK.The episodes are recorded in front of a live audience and read by professional actors.This first episode is a little introductory episode. A mini-sode if you will.
Full Stop by Christopher PatrickPerformed by Colin Little, Hazel Ann Crawford, Kirsty Strain & Charlie Graham.When Jake loses his wife he does what all grieving husbands would do. Buys cheap whiskey and hides in his attic from the in-laws. Will his sister and best friend be able to convince him to come down? And will they have to put up with his wife's family for much longer?The only thing worse than death is dealing with the family in the aftermath. Thankfully, attics were built for hiding.
Pulse by Julie Tsang

Pulse by Julie Tsang


An interrogation inside.A missing female outside.A stranger is being interrogated by the police. There is evidence he did it. But what happens when the so called bad guy turns out to be further from the truth.Pulse is a moving tale of loss, friendship and a heartbeat.Performed by Colin Little & Cameron McGarva.
Responsible by Eve Nicole

Responsible by Eve Nicole


Sam is excited but nervous to leave school and become A Proper Grown Up. She thinks her fun, youthful English teacher, Emma, has got life sorted. But Sam knows little about her private life.Emma hasn’t never really grown up. Comforting herself with Monster Munch and kids’ cartoons, Emma resists embracing her new obligations as a teacher.Sam flatters Emma’s fragile self-esteem, but Emma’s returned attention pulls them into a risky relationship that will challenge their ideas of what it means to be an adult.Growing up can put years on you.Performed by Hazel Ann Crawford, Megan Hair & Kirsty Strain
Patrick ponders the meaning of his life and what might lie ahead after his time in the womb while his brother Stewart takes each day as it comes with no expectations of what the future holds.Their opposing personalities and constant bickering seeing the twins gasping for air as they try to untangle the mess they’ve created……before it leads to fatal consequences. Will there be life after birth for the boys?“You’ve always been on that side, and I’ve always been on this side. Let’s change it up, live a little!”Performed By: Colin Little, Charlie Graham & Cameron McGarva
Why I Want To Drink With Boris Johnson or The Entirely Predictable Trials of Being by C.McMillanA broken hearted writer sits down with a pen to rid his pain and right the world. However, he quickly realises he may not know how to do either. In fact, he barely even knows if he can write; it could all be a bunch of tat with some cool one liners.Who knows?"I'm struggling to remember the last time I had a good idea. Other than the whisky in the morning that is. That was truly inspired."Performed by: Cameron McGarvaProduced & Directed by: Christopher PatrickRecorded by: Keiran LowrieTech: Ian Swinscoe
'Expecting' explores a woman's struggle to come to terms with her pregnancy against the busybody backdrop of a woman's discussion forum. Despite the advice of other smug expectant mothers, Beth feels isolated and unusual. She remains haunted by a memory that distorts the way she sees her own pregnant body.An expectant mother struggles with a haunting memory.Performed by Kirsty StrainWritten by Alice Cairns & Mary Trend
A blink and you'll miss it short sketch about God with a hangover recorded by Neil John Gibson & Kirsty Strain.
The Mackenzie’s are living the high life as Scotland’s most famous reality TV family with their show, Keepin’ Up Wae The Mackenzie’s taking the top spot every year. However, when the show takes a big dip in ratings the producers put into a place a desperate plan to get them back on top……All it’ll take is a little bit of convincing, and a designer vagina or two.Ye cannae choose you’re family…..but ye can choose what channel yer oan.If The Broons met The Kardashians, it would be a little something like this.Written By: Christopher PatrickProduced & Directed By: Christopher PatrickPerformed By: Charlie Graham, Cameron McGarva, Kirsty Strain, Hazel Ann Crawford, Colin Little & Megan HairSound Recorded By: Keiran LowrieTech: Ian SwinscoeRecorded live on the 29th September 2016 at the Beacon Arts Centre, Greenock.Series 1 of Toasted Fiction Theatre is supported by Inverclyde Placed Partnership, Beacon Arts Centre & Emerge.Twitter: @toastedfiction
Guffy by Glenna Scaachi

Guffy by Glenna Scaachi


Guffy is a guttural allegorical tale of the state of our nation.Guffy is a Scottish lass born and bred in Alloa. Present.Alba is the elderly Scottish woman that bred her. Past.The bairn is but a few months old bred by them both. Future.They co-exist at the bottom end of Alloa.“If yer frae the Bottom End ye dinnae get oot”Writer: Glenna ScaachiPerformed By: Karen Bartke, Kirsty Strain & Cameron McGarvaProduced By: Toasted Fiction TheatreDirected By: Christopher Patrick
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