How does addiction or any type of strong hold tries to come back to our life and what do we need to do to stand against that.
We’ve been talking about how to “father” and “mother” grown children— especially when they’ve chosen a different spiritual path than you. (Sometimes, we refer to them as prodigals.) Remember, you can’t control the kid, but you CAN— and should— control your castle. 🏰 Here are the 3 principles we discussed in the previous episode: ✅ Live guilt free. Don’t blame yourself for what they’re choosing. ✅ Be willing to ask for forgiveness. At the same time as you live without guilt over the past, ALSO be willing to admit that you haven’t been perfect. ✅ Learn to love unconditionally. In this episode of Tribe Talk, we outline 3 more: ✅ Allow sin to run its natural consequence in their lives. Life has a great way of teaching the best lessons. Whereas we often want to CONTROL what our grown kids do, it’s best to allow life— and God— to show them the truth of His word. This often requires letting "life" do the teaching. Note: if you choose to micro-manage the situation, you’re actually interposing yourself into a space where God can’t fully work. So, give Him room to move. Continue loving your “child” unconditionally, but let God’s grace— even in its redemptive forms— do its work. As you do this… ✅ Guard your words. It’s easy to talk about “what they’re doing” and discuss “how they’re wrong.” But, we don’t want to do that. We don’t want to complain and give the enemy of foothold. Moreover, we certainly want to guard words spoken TO the child as well as those words ABOUT the child. Rather than murmuring… ✅ Pray specially for them. Rock says, “The Bible says to bless your enemies.” Then— “How much more, then, should we bless our children? Even when they’ve chosen a different path?!” He clarifies— “To bless someone means to release the force of Heaven to change their character… and, thereby, to alter their destiny.” 💥💥💥 Is that not what we want? Note: we also discuss how to navigate this with step-parents… (Hint: the marital relationship that’s intact, in the house, is still foremost. So walk as a unified front.) +++++++++++++ Listen to the previous episodes in this series at: 🎧 intro to the series: https://www.trministries.org/podcasts/tribe-talk/episodes/2147822468 🎧 previous talk, principles 1-3: https://www.trministries.org/podcasts/tribe-talk/episodes/2147822469 Rock mentioned Phil Waldrep’s book, Parenting Prodigals: https://amzn.to/3EIWMvv Watch the 2022 year-end review at https://www.trministries.org/2022
In the previous episode of Tribe Talk we discussed the (sometimes awkward) transition from parenting “children” to mothering and fathering “adults” who still live in your home— and come back. Particularly when they diverge from you in terms of spiritual beliefs and practices. Rock said it well— “Sometimes, you must allow them to pursue their own path.” But, he also reminded us that “even though you can’t control them, you do control the castle. And that means you CAN set the guidelines as to what’s allowed— and not allowed— in your home.” 🏰🏰🏰 He left us with an interesting observation— Pain often plants the flag of reality into the heart of rebellion. Or, to say it another way— sometimes you MUST allow them to experience the ramifications of their decisions. Even if it hurts. Easier said than done, for sure. 💔 In this episode we outline the first 3 of 6 principles you can use to help you navigate the terrain. They are— ✅ Live guilt free. Don’t blame yourself for what they’re choosing. ✅ Be willing to ask for forgiveness. At the same time as you live without guilt over the past, ALSO be willing to admit that you haven’t been perfect. ✅ Learn to love unconditionally— as God does, without strings attached. Note: this doesn’t infer that “anything goes” or that you must embrace their decisions. However, you must accept them… Listen in… Especially if you— or someone you know— is wrestling with what to do with adult “children” who’ve chosen a different path. +++++++++++++ Listen to the previous episode at: Rock mentioned Phil Waldrep’s book, Parenting Prodigals: https://amzn.to/3EIWMvv Watch the 2022 year-end review at https://www.trministries.org/2022
Handling your grown kids is difficult anyway. That is, making the transition from “parenting” them when they're young to “mothering” and “fathering” them when they’re officially adults— and living in home— brings unique challenges. The normal challenges amplify when those kids make different lifestyle choices, pursuing a path that doesn’t align with your faith— often the faith with which they were raised. So what do you do? First, you realize that you whereas you CANNOT control the kids, you CAN control your castle. Or, to say it another way, your home is your domain. As we set up the first of a 3-part series, Rock encourages you to remember— ⭐️ It’s not your fault when they make decisions that deny the faith. ⭐️ You don’t have to kick them out in order to bring peace (he’ll tell you how to navigate this in such a way that you don’t have to permit them to stay, either). ⭐️ You do need to prioritize the marriage covenant you have— and not the child-relationship. In other words, keep things in order, then implement the principles we discuss in the next episode. +++++++++++ To receive help in this area, reach out to us. Our contact info— including email, phone, and a web form— is available at https://www.trministries.org/contact To learn more about our 2022, go to https://www.trministries.org/2022
In this special bonus episode of the Tribe Talk podcast, we discuss Giving Tuesday. What is it? Well… 🦃 Thanksgiving Thursday is the day we gather with friends & family to celebrate. 🤑 Black Friday is the day we go shopping, loading up for Christmas. 🛍 Small Business Saturday is the day we support local business— “ma and pa” shoppes, as well as the enterprises of our friends and co-workers ⛪️ Sunday we go to church. 🤖 Cyber Monday is the day everyone buys stuff online… And… 🎁 Giving Tuesday is when we remember non-profit ministries and charitable organizations, supporting causes we believe in. That’s a lot of 💰💰💰 going out in just a few days… But, since it’s what we do, we decided to get in on the action 😂. When we sat to record a few episodes of the podcast, we decided to create a short intro, and then roll into the footage from Rock’s video year-end review. Listen in. Or watch at https://www.trministries.org/2022 And, yes, we’re grateful for any 💸 you want to send our way.
We asked Michelle to tell us her story— about how she came from wherever she was to Transformation Ministries (first of all) and then how she became the School Adminstrator (second of all). That question took, well… a few exciting twists and turns. 💙 Michelle’s story is proof, as Paul said, that “all things work together for the good.” If all things work together for the good (again, that’s what Paul writes in Romans 8:28f— not that all things ARE good, but that they all work together for good)… … then that also means the facts (i.e., a bad situation) doesn’t necessarily tell the entire story, that is, it doesn’t contain complete truth. 💙 In Brennan Manning's book Abba’s Child, he quotes Saint Augustine’s reflection on this verse as stating that in the economy of God, all things work together for our good. All things. Even our past sins. God can take EVEN that…. He takes every crooked path and makes the way straight. He takes every piece of grit and forms it into gold. He takes the broken pieces of our lives and morphs them into His best. Such is the nature of grace. 💙 It reminds us of a Japanese word: Kintsukuroi. Google it. It’s an art form in which broken pottery is repaired. Rather than restoring the piece to look as if it’s never been damaged (which is, really, impossible), the artisan injects gold into all of the cracks as the pottery is being put back together. The flaws are accentuated, celebrated. In other words, not only are they not hidden, they’re actually highlighted. 💙 No. The scars don’t determine the shape or design of the vessel… they don’t control it’s purpose, but they’re there. And they’re there to see. The “new” version of the pottery looks like the old, but better. It’s simultaneously more raw and more beautiful than the original, “untainted” version. 💙 Can’t miss Paul’s analogy that we’re earthen vessels, pottery with some sort of majesty inside, waiting to come forth (see 2 Corinthians 4:7f.). And the way it comes forth? By facing- and working through- the hard things (2 Corinthians 4:8f.). Maybe that’s why Paul delights in weaknesses- because that’s where strength shines (2 Corinthians 12:10). That’s where grace shines brightest. 💙 Grace + healing + wholeness… is the gold. It means our imperfections now serve a greater purpose than the pain and shame originally created. But… the hitch… In pottery, the gold can only be placed where there are cracks to be filled. ❌ No crack, no space. ❌ No space, no gold to fill the void. ✅ Brokenness is THE thing to which grace almost exclusively bonds. And, when you find the place of brokenness, you realize that your Heavenly Father always trades-up. ++++++++ Register for class at www.TRMinistries.org/locations Learn more about the Transformation School of Ministry at www.TRMinistries.org/school To learn more about the Inner Healing framework at the four courses mentioned, go to https://www.trministries.org/core The first course in the School of Ministry, Inner Healing, is available as an on-demand class. Watch as many times as you’d like, from all your devices. More info at https://www.trministries.org/IH
In this episode of Tribe Talk, Michelle talks about the School of Ministry, and outlines the four course framework of the Inner Healing track. She walks us through: 🏛 Inner Healing (course 1) 🏛 Liberty (course 2) 🏛 Spiritual Warfare (course 3) 🏛 Breaking Strongholds (course 4). We learn from this talk that God certainly does want to do something THROUGH us (which is we most people initially attend the school). In the process, however, we most often discover that the greatest work He’s doing isn’t just so we can achieve something “out there,” it’s so that He can do something mighty “in here.” Or, to say it another way… 👉 God first does something TO us so that He can then do greater things THROUGH us. 👈 That is, sometimes it does have to be about you. At least at first… ++++++++ Register for class at www.TRMinistries.org/locations Learn more about the Transformation School of Ministry at www.TRMinistries.org/school To learn more about the Inner Healing framework at the four courses mentioned, go to https://www.trministries.org/core The first course in the School of Ministry, Inner Healing, is available as an on-demand class. Watch as many times as you’d like, from all your devices. More info at https://www.trministries.org/IH
Jeff and I began talking about emotional health— and how it’s not a “yes” or “no” / healthy or unhealthy thing… … but, rather, how we can be on a “sliding scale,” that is, we don’t want to just walk out of “bad health” and get back to neutral. Rather, we want to walk into the abundance Jesus provides— even in the area of soul wholeness. 🔥 As Jeff explained that God truly want to work in EVERY area of our lives— and that whereas the thief came to steal and kill and destroy BUT Jesus came to bring life (John 10:10), I asked him to trace parts of His story where He saw God moving… moving him from a place of “neutral” and into abundance. That led to a discussion about Hope Filled Rooms, a ministry Jeff tag-teamed with others from a prayer ministry to create in the heart of Woodlawn. 🔥 In his story, we see Jesus weaving together…. ⭐️ a man who once suffered from an orphan heart now taking the heart of the father to others ⭐️ a man who has the highest degree of training possible in his field of expertise being used by God to serve the people who need those skills the most but can never financially afford it ⭐️ a man who one lived with a performance mentality, thinking he had to achieve it all on his own, watch Jesus bring the resources required to serve others at just the right time, precisely when they’re needed. 🔥 Furthermore, this story can be my story— and your story. Jesus doesn’t run out of resources— and His “bank account” isn’t diminished in the least when good things flow in another direction. His storehouses, though He continues pouring from them, remain full. 🔥 ++++++++ Learn more about counseling at Transformation Ministries: https://www.trministries.org/counseling Learn about issue-focused prayer ministry: https://www.trministries.org/prayer To get involved with Hope Filled Rooms, the ministry Jeff discussed: 205-462-7946
Dr. Jeff Dolce reminds me of King David— who led with skill and the empowerment of the Holy Spirit (Psalm 78:72), such that both were important. Full disclosure: I met Jeff several years ago, when I was walking through a tough season of life. I went to him for a psych eval, to see if there was anything I needed to address on a deeper / soul level… I was astounded by the depth of man I met. A PhD by trade, and a worshipper / prayer-warrior by choice (and calling), Jeff is a unique blend and shows how God truly synthesizes every facet of our lives to transform us into who He’s fore-ordained us to be (see Ephesians 2:8-10). 🔥 In this episode of Tribe Talk, Jeff shares his story— personally and professionally. He talks about living “both sides” of the prodigal son(s) story— first as the rebellious son and THEN as the older brother who tried to prove his worth by hustling in the field. Both needed grace. Both needed to step into the Father’s house. 🔥 Jesus told that story to religious elitists who assumed they were IN and others were OUT, and that Jesus had missed it by seeking those who had been deemed “out.” Look at it. Jesus called both rebels and rule-keepers to abandon their lesser identities and embrace their roles as sons & daughters of the king. When they experience the lavish love of their Father, the natural response is to overflow that connection to others. 🔥 It’s easy to believe that God won’t accept us because of our past (even recent past mistakes). Or that He owes us because we’re been “so good.” But our connection with the Father isn’t based on performance, bad or good. It’s based on the truth that we are— and always have been— His. 🔥 ++++++++ Learn more about counseling at Transformation Ministries: https://www.trministries.org/counseling Learn about issue-focused prayer ministry: https://www.trministries.org/prayer See the blog post: www.TRMinistries.org/blog/both
Patti Grace continues discussing how to heal the un-healed hurts of your past, so that you can find and fulfill the purpose God has for you. Here’s why this matters: 👉 in Christ, your salvation is secure. You’ll go to Heaven. 👉 your experience of life now— on the way to Heaven— can differ dramatically, depending on our capacity to lean into the Spirit rather than anchoring to the past hurts of the soul. Patti explains two more important facets of the Issue-Focused Prayer Ministry process here (in the previous episode she talked about the sins of the fathers, as well as ungodly beliefs): 💔 Soul-Spirit Hurts 💔 Oppression Here are a few things we know— First, when God reveals an “issue” to us, He highlights it because we’re ready (and He’s provided the tools we need) to heal it. He doesn’t show us the problem areas in order to squelch us; He reveals them to us so that we might access another level of freedom and wholeness. Second, God does most of His work through people. Sure, He can “make things happen on His own,” but from the beginning of time He’s primarily worked through people. So, He connects us to others in the body of Christ who can help us… Third, your story of healing often becomes the roadmap for others. You learn, as Paul did, to “comfort others with the same comfort you’ve received” (2 Corinthians 1:3-5). Many of the people who serve in the prayer ministry at Transformation have been THROUGH the prayer ministry themselves— as recipients. So, I asked Patti to provide us with instructions on two things: ⭐️ how to receive prayer ministry ⭐️ how to get trained to do prayer ministry +++++++++++++++++ Links = Part 2 of the Inner Healing core curriculum at Transformation School of Ministry = Liberty = https://www.trministries.org/liberty Issue-Focused Prayer Ministry = https://www.trministries.org/prayer How to Schedule a prayer session = https://www.trministries.org/rtf The Personal Questionnaire (PQ) Patti referenced = on the “how to schedule” page = https://www.trministries.org/rtf Blog post (video) re: Soul-spirit hurts = https://www.trministries.org/blog/total
Trials, difficult seasons, hard roads, rocky paths, whatever you want to call them… they can make you bitter OR they can make you better. You get to decide. On one hand, we become HARD and become unapproachable. Maybe even play the victim role. No one will learn anything from our story- including ourselves- except for “don’t cross me again.” We may even use pop psychology to defend our position or, even worse, put a spiritual halo atop the dysfunction. That’s one way to handle it. A lot of people do. And, in doing so, we often find that we continue “re-hurting” the same wound over and over. An unhealed hurt, it seems, never heals. Furthermore, it continues getting re-hurt and hurting other things. 🤷♂️ On the other hand, we can become SOFT, pliable, and OOZE a tangible grace, the kind exhibited by Job, the very one who prayed and restored those who (self-righteously, but well-intentioned) opposed him in the ashes (Job 42:10). 💙 In this episode of Tribe Talk, Patti Grace shares her story, outlines how Issue-Focused Prayer Ministry works, and highlights two of the four stepping stones towards healing… First, she discussed “the sins of the fathers,” a propensity to pick up the bad habits (and hurts) of people in our family line. Second, she talks about our belief systems— and the importance of aligning our mindset with the truths of Scripture. “Ungodly Beliefs,” as they’re called, can hinder our healing… ++++++++++++++++++ Links = Part 2 of the Inner Healing core curriculum at Transformation School of Ministry = Liberty = https://www.trministries.org/liberty Issue-Focused Prayer Ministry = https://www.trministries.org/prayer How to Schedule a prayer session = https://www.trministries.org/rtf The Personal Questionnaire (PQ) Patti referenced = on the “how to schedule” page = https://www.trministries.org/rtf Blog post (video) re: Sins of the Fathers = https://www.trministries.org/blog/blessing