U Up?

Another Bachelor breakup broke the internet this week. After four years of dating and no engagement in sight, Matt James called quits on his relationship with Rachael Kirkconnell. With all the confusion and discourse over this breakup, Jared and Jordana enter the chat with their own takeaways. On “Icky or Picky,” a listener ends up dating a meme king which is all fun and games until he sends her about 30 memes over the course of two days. When things don’t work out between them, he sends her a Venmo request for the cost a previous date. In a dramatic reading of these text exchanges, Jared channels his inner spaghetti Western villain. Later, we hear from a listener who’s experimenting in her love life by dating a “nice guy” for once, who just so happens to do everything with his ex girlfriend. And by everything, we mean couples massages, hanging out multiple times a week and going on romantic vacations. Have a dating question for Jordana and Jared? Send an email or voice memo to uup@betches.com or leave us a voicemail at our dating hotline 212-589-8903.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re one month into 2025 and J&J are here to keep you motivated, even if you already quit your New Year’s Resolutions. Jordana is fresh off of hosting a housewarming party and Jared is struggling to find time to write a book about dating while actively still dating. Later, we hop into emails, including a listener who wonders if her friends actually need to know the guy she’s dating and we answer the mother of all dating questions: How do I approach the gym hottie without being creepy? Today’s “Awkward Encounter” takes us to church with a wild listener story about hooking up with their former worship leader. On “Red Flag or Deal Breaker,” J&J debate if terrible reviews on RateMyProfessor are a good reason to not date someone, consider what proper texting etiquette looks like during a national emergency, and question whether it’s bad form to refuse to go to a certain dating spot because it isn’t romantic enough. Have a dating question for Jordana and Jared? Send an email or voice memo to uup@betches.com or leave us a voicemail at our dating hotline 212-589-8903.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

More than 25 years later, "Sex and the City" is still on our minds when it comes to how we would handle dating and relationships. However, since Gen Z has entered the chat and millennials hit double-digit rounds of rewatching, the discussions have shifted from identifying as the Carrie of your group to Carrie Bradshaw arguably being one of the worst characters we know. Still, Jared and Jordana aren't ready to hop on the hate train yet. They break down why we're so repulsed by some of Carrie's most memorable moments and how it translates into our evolving love lives. Plus, they play a round of "Icky or Picky?" about a flirty text that fell flat. The episode ends with an advice email about overcoming post-breakup pettiness. Is it natural to want to wish pain upon your ex when you're still reeling from a breakup, or do specific actions need to be taken to move on? Have a dating question for Jordana and Jared? Send an email or voice memo to uup@betches.com or leave us a voicemail at our dating hotline 212-589-8903.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s the dead of winter and we’re all in “hamper girl mode.” Jordana and Jared shake off the cold by jumping into some heated dating questions. Can a person have too many ongoing chats on a dating app? How do I know if breaking up was the right decision? And TikTok has spoken: Ghosting is out and “avoidant discarding” is in. J&J discuss this new dating term and how it’s even worse than just leaving someone on read. Later, a listener meets his Reese Witherspoon-esque dream girl. The catch? She lives in a completely different city. J&J give him pointers on how to set up a second date without scaring her off. The “Awkward Encounter”, a typically smooth bartender dreads a looming speed dating event he signed up for. J&J coach him on how to make a great first impression. Then we play “Red Flag, Deal Breaker?,” about a post-sex breakup comment, missing ice cube trays and a date who is only looking for one thing. Have a dating question for Jordana and Jared? Send an email or voice memo to uup@betches.com or leave us a voicemail at our dating hotline 212-589-8903. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s a second-guessing time of year on the podcast and in the dating world! Should you go out even though you're not feeling it in the thick of winter? Should you go for it with the cute person you met in your hometown? All the kinds of questions that J&J are tackling this Friday! They play a round of “Petty or Prudent?” about texting an ex’s family that his cheating is the reason your relationship is ending. Plus, a listener writes in about wanting to pursue the guy in her hometown thousands of miles away, but she’s not sure she’s in it for the right reasons. After her last breakup and a similar situation, is going for a Hallmark-level romance just a way to evade vulnerability or a better way to ease into a new relationship? J&J discuss her circumstance and whether she’s processed emotions enough to make a decision. Have a dating question for Jared & Jordana? Send an email or voice memo to uup@betches.com or leave us a voicemail at our hotline 212-589-8903 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the midst of reflecting and changing, this episode is on theme for the new year shifts you’re trying to make happen! After J&J catch each other up on their holiday breaks, a listener committed to keeping casual wonders how she can keep her anxious dating habits at bay. The Awkward Encounter would be a nightmare for any parent and teen. Then, after dedicating his 20s to his career, a 30m listener asks how to make his focus more dating-centric. Can a demanding job complement his dating life or is it time for a career change? The episode ends with a “Red Flag or Deal Breaker?” about strange Instagram follows, working throughout a date, and a quirky reuse choice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If someone isn’t for you, let them. Easier said than done, but in today’s episode, we’re joined by Mel Robbins (@melrobbins), motivational speaker and author of “The Let Them Theory”, to tell us how. After Mel comes in hot with a reality check that we may be the cause of our biggest problems, Jared and Jordana question how listeners can apply the Let Them Theory to their lives whether they’re on the apps, ready to have kids or in a constant communication rut with their significant other.For more from our guest, pick up your copy of “The Let Them Theory” here: https://amzn.to/3DJDmsr Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, J & J are fresh off a dinner party together, but Jared’s own awkward encounter at a bar afterwards has him regretting that nightcap martini. After some daydreaming about winter getaways, we dig into the e-mails, starting with a listener who put their friend onto the pod, watched them succeed at finding love, but keeps striking out on their own. They tackle a couple of listener’s dating app woes, like should you stop replying if they make an edit to their profile you really dislike? Today’s "Awkward Encounter" pushes the boundaries between “awkward” and “heartbreaking,” with a write-in from a woman who thought she was getting a ring but got a break-up instead. Keeping the New Year unhinged, “Red Flag or Deal Breaker” covers disclosing food allergies, being pushy about “going to my place”, and talking about your parents sex lives on a first date… which we think might require a little more professional help. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dating Coach, Hinge Relationship Science expert, and friend of the pod Logan Ury (@loganury) is here to help J & J answer the question haunting single women everywhere: Where are all the guys?!? Her new Netflix show “The Later Daters,” where she coaches singles over 55 on how to get back in the dating scene, is now streaming – and proving that some dating struggles never change, even with age. They really dig into Logan’s 2025 passion projects: the gender imbalance in dating, the need for male support networks, and how we can improve the male end of the dating pool. We hear from one listener who wants to know if being single for years makes them undateable, but Logan’s here to assure us all that it’s never too late to find love. All of this tees up Monday’s special Benefits episode: Logan coaching Jared, on air, no holding back. You won’t want to miss it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Happy New Year, U Up? listeners! J&J are ringing in the New Year doing what they do best: going a little bit off the rails. Jared plans to celebrate the New Year by toasting his martini to the moon (and hopes you will toast him back, wherever she is). They reflect about their 2024, before diving into some of Jared’s 2025 dating resolutions which include new-and-improved dating lines, personal improvement, and why you should be an even worse first date. Then, we hear from one listener who wants to know if she should be vision boarding her relationship, and an older listener grappling with a middle-aged breakup. Finally, we end with a quick “Red Flag or Deal Breaker,” where every write-in has us asking, “what’s going on with men??” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The holidays are coming to a close, the New Year is looming – is it time to get your shit together? We’re ending 2024 by welcoming author, entrepreneur, and returning guest Ramit Sethi (@ramit) to the studio for a (seriously) fun conversation about money and relationships. His new book, "Money for Couples", is about how to create your most "Rich Life." It’s a touchy subject, but Ramit holds our hand through it all: how to broach the money convo early on, reframing financial conversations through a more romantic lens, what you might not be considering when thinking about engagement rings, and so much more. Plus, we hear from a male listener struggling with gender-based expectations when it comes to paying on dates – why is it so awkward to go Dutch? We wrap things up with a rapid fire game, “Fund It or Forget It.” See you in 2025! Buy Ramit Sethi's book here. Check out Ramit Sethi's 2022 U Up episode on Apple or Spotify. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

‘Twas the U Up? before Christmas so J&J dressed up for fun. Regardless of your holiday plans, you won’t want to miss this one! With unhinged holiday spirit taking over the entire studio, they play a round of “Naughty or Nice?”, offer up Jared’s first date of 2025, and end with a holiday competition of ‘Twas The Night Before Christmas rewrites by Jared and our producer, Candice. Plus, the Awkward Encounter involves a feline funk and J&J give a reality check when a cheating woman writes in with hopes for her next relationship before she’s ended her current one. Head to our Instagram @u.up.podcast to vote on our pod poetry and get details on how to win a date with Jared. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does 2025 hold for your love life? Kelley Knight (@kelley__knight), psychic and owner of Modern Mystic Shop, returns to the studio to help us see what’s in store for each of our futures! First, she surprises J&J with gifts and they catch up since she gave Jared a reading in an episode last December. Then, Jared and Jordana each ask a question about different aspects of their lives for a quick reading. The episode ends with a round of Tarotscopes as Kelley makes predictions for each zodiac sign, with our hosts and producers paying extra attention to our own signs.For more from our guest, follow @modernmystic_shop or visit modernmystic.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After a couple weeks away from the studio and just days after Jared’s special taping, Jordana starts this episode by giving Jared his flowers and catches him up on her girls’ trip as the hosts settle back in. The first email asks for advice for everyone traveling to stay with family over the holiday season. How do you balance dating and family time when you’re away from your city, but don’t want to take a break? The Awkward Encounter, sponsored by A24’s Babygirl, comes from a woman unsure when to bring up her kinks to find the right partner. Next, a listener with a calculated approach to her dating life is starting to second-guess herself after her friends’ judgment about her current situation. The episode ends with a round of “Red Flag or Deal Breaker?” about family baggage, an angry cat, and a vegan’s roach reservations. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feeling lucky? On par with Friday the 13th, Jared and Jordana ease into the episode with their thoughts on superstitions, energy, and beliefs. Plus, Jared shares where his head is at ahead of a recording break for the Thanksgiving holiday, Jordana’s trip, and his special taping. Then, they play a game called “Is That My Wife?” inspired by Jared’s DMs. The episode ends with an email from a 26M listener wondering if he should be feeling more for the woman he’s been seeing for a couple of months or if dating in the digital age has skewed his perspective. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why won’t Jared go to therapy? We get this question often and, this week, he shares his own thought on why as well as a helpful TikTok, "Men Who Wear Masks And Struggle With Conflict" by @elisemicheals. Plus, he and Jordana are slipping more into f*ck it mode for the holidays. The first email is advice ahead of office holiday party season when your coworkers knew your ex: how do you introduce your new boyfriend to your coworkers without any awkward moments? The Awkward Encounter has a strange condom request. Then, we hear from a listener who’s growing frustrated with a conversation ick with the guy she’s dating. Every time she shares a story, he somehow makes it about himself. Can they get over these conflicting communication styles? The episode ends with a “Red Flag or Deal Breaker?” about turning a submission into a Hinge prompt, an off-putting first date experience, and acting like a baby when you’re sick Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

J&J are feeling good for this Friday episode with big plans for both hosts, and with this kind of energy, you never know where the conversation will take them! As you’ve seen on IG Stories by now, Jordana should be on her way back from a group trip and Jared is gearing up for his special taping in Tarrytown. With live performances on their minds, and as with most conversations lately, Wicked finds its way into their chat–except it just has Jared missing when he was into Marvel movies. Plus, Jared gets a lesson in chlamydia (yes, chlamydia) from Jordana ahead of his Australia trip. The episode ends with a reveal: with soulmate drawings picking up on TikTok, Candice commissioned a reading for Jared. J&J react to the predictions from the Etsy psychic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re officially in “let’s circle back in the new year” territory, and to embrace it, J&J set out to make this the most unhinged U Up? episode this year. They talk about the pursuit of meaningful relationships and how the distraction of dating apps is clouding the way for the people making actual efforts. Plus, after the public reaction to Benny Blanco sharing that his relationship with Selena Gomez started by her asking him out*, they talk about the public’s perceptions of their relationship and the obstacles that even Selena has faced as a successful woman that wants to find love. The first email comes from a listener writing in from the post-date Uber: what are the signs a guy wants you to leave after sex? She shares what she took as signs to leave, and J&J weigh in on whether she overthought the situation. The Awkward Encounter comes from Genova as a listener has an unusually sexual sight in her new city. The next email is questioning whether to act on being called “The One That Got Away.” Our listener’s reconnection with her ex reignited feelings, but should she just leave it alone out of respect for his new relationship, or was his admittance to still loving her an invite to try again? The episode ends with a round of “Red Flag or Deal Breaker?” about homework before spending a holiday together, hiking on a first date and using a childhood nickname. *The Benny Blanco clip we react to is from Kai Cenat’s YouTube video, “Benny Blanco Comes On Kai Cenat's Stream!” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s the biggest shopping day of the year, but before you get the new iPhone 16, J&J want you to know how a new AI feature on the iOS 18 update could affect your dating life. With breakup texts submitted to our Instagram and a ChatGPT assist from our producer, Shannon, Jared and Jordana break down how the conversations went and generate what an AI version would look like. They also determine when a breakup text is appropriate and play out their own breakup scenarios. The episode ends with a round of “Icky or Picky?” about proposing a shopping spree for a first date. Is this a fun way to get spoiled for a few hours by a dating app rando, or is it just creepy? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s officially our favorite time of the year and J&J get a little unhinged today as they amp up for what’s to come! They come in hot with a fresh new rant about TikTok’s favorite couple, Pookie and Jett. Plus, because the holidays are a tricky time for love lives regardless of status, J&J are guiding you through Thanksgiving and the start of holiday season with a lightning round of advice. They listen to a slightly shady voicemail from a curious mom and answer a range of Instagram submissions covering various holiday hiccups, from early dating momentum to interfaith relationships and in-law issues. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices