Two years ago on March 2023 I shared a conversation that I had with my good friend Marc Ngotonie. In it, we talked about what mental health means for him, and what he was doing to create spaces for it. Marc shared a deeply insightful take on society's expectations on men and how this affects their mental health. About a month ago - about two years later - Marc and I reconnect. He shares how responsibilities in life changed his priorities and what looking after his mental health looks like now. We catch up on the loss of spaces to talk about mental health and what that means to him.Excitedly, we also talk about his new marriage and what being married is teaching him. This is a conversation about being open to learning what life throws at you. Marc demonstrates this with humility, intellect and a deep desire to foster a beautiful and meaningful life with his wife. You can listen to this episode from wherever you get your podcasts! Connect with me and stay updated:Twitter:Follow Mariam Simbeye: @SimbeyeMariamFollow the podcast: @_yourmindthepodInstagram:Follow Mariam Simbeye: @_sheismari_Follow the podcast: @_yourmindthepodcastFacebook:Like and follow my Facebook page: "Your Mind Matters Too"Remember, Your Mind Matters Too!
I used to think detachment was this cold thing people did to avoid feeling. I saw it as aloof, impenetrable… even unkind. A way to escape accountability or vulnerability. But here’s the truth: I was doing it too. Not to hurt anyone, but to survive.In this episode of Your Mind Matters Too, I open up about how detachment became my survival mechanism. It was the armor I didn’t know I’d built; the way I protected myself when I didn’t have better tools. But I’m learning now that there’s a difference between shutting down and setting boundaries. Especially as an empath, detachment doesn’t mean disconnection. It means learning to discern: what’s mine to carry, and what’s not. I’m still figuring it out. And I don’t always get it right. But like most things in healing, I don’t do it to be perfect— I do it because it’s the perfectly right thing for me.Tune in wherever you get your podcasts. This one’s for anyone learning how to feel deeply without losing themselves in the process.Let’s connect and continue the conversation:📸 Instagram:@_sheismari_@_yourmindthepodcast🐦 Twitter/X:@_yourmindthepod🌐 Website:www.mariamsimbeye.com
Healing is a personal journey, but are you truly holding yourself accountable? In this episode, I delve into the concept of practising radical accountability—exploring what that may look like, what it doesn’t, and why it’s so transformative. In this episode I’ll unpack: The role of self-accountability in healing. Why external support matters, but the real work begins within. Real-life examples of how avoiding accountability blocks growth. How compassion and unlearning societal myths play a role. Expert-backed steps to help you start practicing accountability today. Healing starts with you—but you don’t have to do it alone. Listen now to begin your journey.
Episode Summary: In this episode, I take a compassionate and unfiltered look at addiction—not just as a habit but as a deeply rooted response to unhealed emotional pain. This isn’t about defining addiction or exploring its surface-level symptoms. Instead, I am asking a much harder, often ignored question: Why does addiction happen?By diving into the complex human experience behind addiction, I hope to offer listeners a fresh perspective on how we view addiction in our society. I talk about the different forms addiction can take—beyond drugs and alcohol—and why, despite increasing awareness, Tanzania and many societies around the world still struggle to find truly holistic ways to address it. I also share a little of my journey, exploring the lessons I’ve learned about the need for compassion, the courage to acknowledge our wounds and the deep desire we all have to self-soothe in the face of pain.What You’ll Hear in This Episode:A reflection on addiction as a reaction to pain, rather than simply a habitInsights into why our society often fails to treat addiction holistically.The importance of asking “why” addiction happens, rather than focusing solely on what an addiction looks like. Why it’s critical to recognize behavioral addictions—those often hidden or socially accepted, yet equally as impactful.A heartfelt message to anyone struggling with addiction, or loving someone who is, with a reminder that healing isn’t something anyone can or should try to do aloneA Personal Note: This episode is for everyone who has felt the weight of addiction in any form—whether in themselves or in someone they care about. I approach this conversation with humility, recognizing that there’s so much we all still need to learn. As we go through this journey together, my hope is to open up the conversation about addiction in a way that encourages understanding, healing, and, above all, compassion.Thank you for tuning in, being open to the tough questions, and walking with me through this deeply personal exploration.
Hi there mental health lovers! I am back again for a new season and I could not be more thrilled! Inspired by the critically acclaimed movie adaptation of Colleen Hoover's "It Ends With Us," I find myself asking this question: Should love hurt? I mean seriously, I am a little torn about it... In this episode, I cover what it means to be fully human; to feel and to love, even when it hurts. But I ask still, should love hurt? No one is impervious to pain and pain demands to be felt, but what DOES that mean for our romantic relationships if love is pain? Tune in today without missing a beat and if you like what you just heard, do share an episode with a friend or loved one 😉 Follow me on IG and X for more updates: IG: @_yourmindthepodcast X/Twitter: @_yourmindthepod
Hi there, and welcome to my podcast! I'm Mariam Simbeye, and if you're looking for a safe space to explore conversations around mental health, you're in the right place. Join me as I openly share my own personal journey through some of my toughest struggles, with the hope that my story resonates with you and encourages you to talk about your own challenges and seek the help you deserve. Catch up on updates on socials via; IG: @_yourmindthepodcast X: @_yourmindthepod
What does it mean to be happy? This week I'm exploring the complexities of being a happy human being that's also completely falling apart. I learned that being happy doesn't last long, and that falling apart directly correlates with feelings of joy and happiness. This means that joy, happiness, pain and sadness exist together. So this episode is about embracing being both happy and falling apart.
As children we are never taught how to love ourselves. We spend most of our adult life living in a state of perpetual longing to be accepted. Seeking this external validation has proven to have detrimental effects on our mental health. Since May is Mental Health Awareness Month, I'd love to raise awareness on 𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐀𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐀𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞
In this episode of Your Mind Matters Too, we're diving headfirst into the world of fear and how it's more familiar to us than we might think. Episode Highlights: - Getting Real: Join me as I open up about my journey through life's quirks and challenges. From seeking validation through screens to dealing with my own mouthy mental chatter, we're in for a candid chat. - Embracing the Quirks: Discover my unique habit of greeting and responding to myself, and the little eccentricities that make us who we are. - Fear, My Constant Companion: We're delving deep into the realm of fear, exploring how it can be more constant than peace and love. Get ready for some honest reflection on how fear shaped my thoughts and actions. - Learning from Fiction: The characters in books and movies? They've been my crash course in dealing with fear. From horror screams to rom-com confessions, let's talk about preparing for the unknown. - Navigating Fear's Maze: Uncover how I've learned to navigate fear's twists and turns. It's not about conquering it, but about living in it, and finding hope even amidst the discomfort. - Daring to Dream: I share my struggles with hope, big dreams, and why living fully sometimes means leaning into the discomfort of uncertainty. Tune in to this episode and discover how, even in the face of fear, we can choose to be hopeful, daring, and unstoppable dreamers. Join the conversation and let's conquer fear together! Remember to subscribe and leave a review if you enjoy the episode! _________________________________________ Get Luvvie Ajayi Jones's book via https://luvvie.org/books/professional-troublemaker/ Follow the podcast on Instagram: @_yourmindthepod, @_sheismari_ Twitter: @yourmindthepod, @SimbeyeMariam Facebook Page: Your Mind Matters Too
On this episode of Zoom with Mari, I had the pleasure of speaking with Marc Ngotonie, talented self-taught events and portrait photographer based in Tanzania. With a career spanning back to 2015, Marc initially focused on capturing the magic of weddings and corporate events. However, his artistic journey took an exciting turn as he delved into photographing live music performances, including the renowned Sauti za Busara, a pan-African music festival held annually in Zanzibar.His unwavering passion for using photography as a powerful storytelling medium sets Marc apart. Through his lens, he skillfully allows his subjects to take centre stage, enabling their stories to come alive in vivid detail. With a keen eye for capturing raw emotions and authentic moments, Marc's photographs serve as windows into captivating narratives.In this episode, we dive deep into a thought-provoking discussion on masculinity and mental health, exploring the significance of creating safe spaces for men to connect with each other. Marc brings his unique perspective as a photographer, shedding light on the challenges men face in navigating societal expectations and the impact it can have on their mental well-being. We explore the transformative power of vulnerability and the importance of fostering supportive environments that encourage men to open up and seek help when needed.Join us for this inspiring conversation as we uncover the complexities of masculinity, the journey of personal growth, and the role that mental health plays in shaping the lives of men. Through Marc's insightful experiences and thoughtful reflections, you'll gain a fresh perspective and a deeper understanding of the intersection between masculinity, mental health, and the quest for authentic connection.Tune in to this enlightening episode of Zoom with Mari and be prepared to embark on a transformative journey of self-discovery and empowerment.___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Please note that this episode was originally recorded on Union Day. Since then, many things have evolved, including the exciting news that Marc's podcast, previously known as #30MinsWithMarc, has undergone a rebranding and is now called #Morethan30.Connect with me and stay updated:Twitter:Follow Mariam Simbeye: @SimbeyeMariamFollow the podcast: @_yourmindthepodInstagram:Follow Mariam Simbeye: @_sheismari_Follow the podcast: @_yourmindthepodcastFacebook:Like and follow my Facebook page: "Your Mind Matters Too"Remember, Your Mind Matters Too!
Trigger Warning: This episode discusses heavy and sensitive topics related to mental health and ongoing violence and hatred in the world that may be triggering or difficult for some listeners. If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, I encourage you to seek support or skip this episode if you feel it may be harmful to your mental health. In this episode, I spoke candidly about my mental health and the ongoing violence and hatred in the world that has left me feeling hopeless. I opened up about my struggles and shared my thoughts and emotions on this heavy and personal topic. During the episode, I discussed the following: 1. Feeling tired, anxious, scared, and numb about the state of the world we are in right now. 2. The ways in which I lie to myself about how I'm feeling, and how it is easy to know what to do when your mental health is in the dumps but how it's harder to put it into practice. 3. The ways in which I choose to distract myself from the pain I feel over the state of the world right now. 4. How all of these things have made me depressed and feeling desolate. I have a hard time getting out of bed, and I'm increasingly exhausted by the weight of all the emotions I feel and I pick up from my environment. If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, please know that there is help available. While the topics discussed in this episode are heavy and emotional, it's important to remember that hope and support are available. If you or anyone you know needs help, please reach out and know that you are not alone. You can find me here: Instagram: @_yourmindthepodcast, @_sheismari_ Twitter: @_yourmindthepod, @SimbeyeMariam Facebook Page: Your Mind Matters Too!
The word "comfort" is fascinating to me because it is an English word that can mean many things, such as a feeling, an act of giving, a state of being, or adding something where something was missing. I used to believe it was one of the most positive words in the English language because it balances the negativity in the world. However, after listening to TED Talks and podcasts about people doing incredible things, I realized that at the heart of all these incredible things was the act of getting out of your comfort zone as an essential part of personal growth. Now, while the stories of people doing hard and dangerous things were inspiring, I couldn't help but wonder why I am afraid to leave MY comfort zone. In this episode, I talk about how everyone loves feeling comfortable, especially in a familiar environment where they can predict the outcome of their actions. However, I share a personal experience of climbing a mountain that challenged my comfort zone and left a profound impact on my life. I realized that seeking comfort may not always be the best way to grow and that discomfort can lead to valuable self-discovery. While I'm still learning to embrace discomfort, I hope this episode inspires listeners to step out of their comfort zones and explore new experiences. If you liked what you heard, please Subscribe to the podcast from wherever you're listening, and please consider leaving me a review. You can reach out to me via my pages: Instagram: _yourmindthepodcast / _sheismari_ Twitter: @_yourmindthepod / @SimbeyeMariam Facebook Page: Your Mind Matters Too!
This is the second part of a two-part episode about The Power of Naming Your Emotions. In this episode, I talk about how I’d been conditioned as a child not to express my emotions or process them in a healthy manner. Coming from a big family, this survival mode worked to get me through tough times because I could always high-function my way out of difficult situations but in time, I’ve realized that my state of high function only worsens my mental health. I have had to learn how to gracefully take the time to process my emotions rather than repress or ignore them, and I’ve been able to do that by learning how to name my emotions and find ways to express them myself. If you are the type of person that processes things internally or can expertly compartmentalize your emotions and “schedule emotional breakdowns” this is an episode for you. It’s an episode about trusting your inner self to handle the difficult emotions that come up for you while navigating through life. Most importantly, this episode is about learning what each and every lesson your emotions try to impart. To paraphrase a quote from Dr. Brené Brown, we are deeply feeling human beings who occasionally think. Our emotions can be our greatest tools to survive and live a happily enriched life. So we don’t have to hide from them or ignore them to get through difficult situations. So feel, and be free to feel because you were made to feel. I hope this episode resonates with you to take braver steps into exploring inside your heart what you are truly about. If you like what you hear, please leave me a review and share the podcast with your friends and family. Tell me what are some of the emotions that you find difficult to name, start that conversation amongst yourselves and see how powerful and transformative it can be to name your emotions. ____________________________________________________________________________ Get new updates via: Instagram: @_yourmindthepodcast / @_sheismari_ Twitter: @_yourmindthepod / Facebook: Like, comment and share my page Your Mind Matters Too!
Masuma Somji is a kickass mental health activist, feminist, and teacher! Amongst other things, she vocally advocates for mental health awareness and uses her platform to speak against gender-based violence and patriarchy. Her story is one forged from violence and pain; having grown up in an oppressive and increasingly patriarchal community, having been married at 19 to a man who physically and verbally abused her, and making the painful decision to leave him - and her kids. She's a perfect example of learning in real-time, a woman brave enough to open her heart and show us all the scars inside. She's a friend and an absolute sweetheart; this conversation is one of many I'll have with her. Listen to the full episode now!
Masuma Somji is a kickass mental health activist, feminist, and teacher! Amongst other things, she vocally advocates for mental health awareness and uses her platform to speak against gender-based violence and patriarchy. Her story is one forged from violence and pain; having grown up in an oppressive and increasingly patriarchal community, having been married at 19 to a man who physically and verbally abused her, and making the painful decision to leave him - and her kids. She's a perfect example of learning in real-time, a woman brave enough to open her heart and show us all the scars inside. She's a friend and an absolute sweetheart; this conversation is one of many I'll have with her. You can follow Masuma via Instagram @masuma_somji Watch her incredible movie about mental health - based on real-life events - at https://youtu.be/8QiF2gcg_vU ___________________________________________________________________________________ Zoom with Mari is a new segment of the podcast Your Mind Matters Too where I talk with some of my favorite people via Zoom about various topics. Our conversations are deep, lighthearted, painful, and sometimes uncomfortable but I believe necessary. These are the people I could talk to for hours and never feel like a single minute has passed and I wanted a chance for you all to experience some of their incredible light as much as I do. You can now listen via www.mariamsimbeye.com/podcast Get podcast updates via: Podcast social media: Website: www.mariamsimbeye.com/podcast Twitter: @_yourmindthepod Instagram: @_yourmindthepodcast Facebook: Your Mind Matters Too
Emotions come in different ranges for us all. How we feel influences how we move through the world and feel about ourselves. We quickly learn to connect through language as children but when we get older, we feel disconnected from ourselves and from those around us because our universes are limited by the language of our emotions. I got a little nerdy in this episode because I referred to my favorite researcher Dr. Brenè Brown's newest bestseller Atlas of the Heart. In this book, she teaches us the power of the language of emotions. This episode is the first part of a two-part podcast on how to use language to name our emotions. In that sense, this is the journey to properly connect with our inner selves. I am guided by the question: WHY WE DO STRUGGLE WITH NAMING OUR EMOTIONS? ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Instagram: @_yourmindthepodcast / @_sheismari_ Facebook: Your Mind Matters Too! *** If you want to be featured in Part Two of this podcast, send me a voice note and I'll play it as one of my segments. __________________________________________________________________________ If you would like to learn more: Books: 1. Atlas of the Heart - https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/ 2. Healing Trauma - https://www.amazon.com/Healing-Trauma-Pioneering-Program-Restoring/dp/159179658X Other Podcasts: 1. Super Soul - https://podcasts.apple.com/tz/podcast/bren%C3%A9-brown-atlas-of-the-heart-part-1/id1264843400?i=1000543582754 - https://podcasts.apple.com/tz/podcast/bren%C3%A9-brown-atlas-of-the-heart-part-2/id1264843400?i=1000543582888 2. We Can Do Hard Things - https://podcasts.apple.com/tz/podcast/we-can-do-hard-things-with-glennon-doyle/id1564530722?i=1000555783926 3. The Codependent Perfectionist - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/parenting-spicy-children-with-heidi-rogers/id1457781449?i=1000568438817
“Fake It Till You Make It” is the lie we get told because someone thought it would be fun to tell other people that the only way they will get through life is if they faked everything that was going wrong and pretended it wasn’t. This is a mindset left over from generations taught to ignore adversity; thrive in it and wait for salvation. Might be controversial - but I don’t think it worked then. It certainly does not work today. Today, saying “fake it till you make it” is as good as signing someone’s death. While some people function relatively well while “faking” their problems, where mental health is concerned, the ONLY way to make it through a mental health crisis is by working through it. So don’t fake it, talk about it. So don’t fake it, cry about it. So don’t fake it, get help to get over it. So don’t fake it, you won’t make it!
What does it mean when we are asked to “SHOW UP?” It can mean physically showing your presence when someone needs you or it can mean some more covert things like giving your time listening to a friend whose heart is breaking. Showing up is our human way of saying we care for one another and it looks different for everyone. There is no “one right way” of showing up and perhaps that’s the beauty of it - it means YOU get to decide how YOU wish to show up for those you care about, taking into consideration your belief systems, your joys, your fears and your own opinions about what it means to show up. In this episode, I talk about how a friend that had died showed up for me and how I continue to honor him by trying to show up for myself and for those I love in the best ways I know how. I fail sometimes because I am constantly learning about what things work for me and what do not. But I still try to show up the best way I know how; by being completely, authentically me. That doesn’t come easy but when it does, boy, I show up selflessly. I also talk about what it means to show up for MYSELF. Something as easy as being brutally honest with myself about where I am in my journey allows me to honor my heart even when I am showing up for others. Especially then. Life is hard and messy. And we all need people to show up for us. How that will look like is entirely up to YOU. _________________________________________________________________________________ I hope you enjoy this episode and it resonates with you. Please consider leaving me a review to let me know what you think and please do share the link to the podcast with your loved ones. That's one way that YOU can SHOW UP for ME!!
I recognize that I’m good at many things and I also know I struggle with many other things. In this week’s episode, I talk about how I struggle with being vulnerable and how that has affected how I deal with my mental health. This episode is about working through the uncomfortable feelings and doing hard things - however that looks like for you. Perhaps your hard thing is quitting a bad habit, or it is finally living your life in the most authentic way you can imagine for yourself. But for some reason or another, it doesn’t come easy for you to do that. This episode is a reminder that whatever your hard thing is, find it, embrace it, and do it anyway. Instagram: @_yourmindthepodcast / @_sheismari_ _______________________________________________________________ PART ONE: Some hard things I struggle with. Surviving hardships and finding that my journey is valid. Empathy, Sympathy, and Compassion. PART TWO: Thinking I know it all. The struggle to ask for help. Asking the hard questions. Realized that I'm still learning ___________________________________________________________________
This episode is all about how shame is at the root of all our struggles with mental health. We have been so conditioned to avoid the shame that the very thing we end up feeling in the midst of struggle is shame. Learning from Dr. Brènè Brown's research and her famous TEDx Talk on Shame and Vulnerability, as well as her book The Gifts of Imperfections, I unpack some of the instances where I have felt shame during my mental health struggle. In the end, the lesson is pretty simple: Shame needs secrecy to survive so to survive that, you must tell your story.