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Pod To Pluto

Pod To Pluto

Author: Cornucopia Radio

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Space. The final job before I quit. These are the voyages of 'UK Space Agency Engineering Pod Number 46'. My five-year mission: to explore the ten square metres I'm trapped inside, seek out Pluto and boldly go switch off a lightbulb. If it's still on...

Welcome to our new scifi comedy audiodrama 'Pod To Pluto' and say hello to 'Jemima Belafonte' and her 'Pod' computer. As they try and keep each other company during a very long 4.6 billion mile trip to Pluto to go turn off a lightbulb.

Written by Peter Richard Adams. Starring Laura England and Wayne Russell.
21 Episodes
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I’m currently floating around untethered in space near Pluto. Pod meanwhile seems to be a giant fireball with a massive hole torn in its side. So in summary, things could be a little bit better. But the show will return and series four is going to wrap up this entire crazy story and will be arriving on your devices later in summer 2021. So stay subscribed to this feed, don’t go anywhere and stay safe, because we love each and everyone of you.
Join Jemima & Pod as they spend a long day waiting for ‘Pod Zero’ to arrive, in a production clearly not ghost-written by Samuel Beckett. So can our existential search for meaning in this world be summed up by a five billion mile journey to Pluto to go turn off a lightbulb? Or is this just another case of us all ‘passing the time’ together? Whatever happens, one thing alone is clear. We are waiting for Pod Zero to come. Also... it better not kill us horribly when it arrives! Welcome back to our scifi comedy podcast audiodrama; as we get ready to enter the endgame. Just as we’re about to reach our final destination. Stay subscribed; as the situation on Pluto is about to take a number of shocking twists....
In the far future, #SocialMedia eventually became illegal once it was discovered that the constant stream of useless trivia literally scrambled your head! With studies showing that your brain after one month on #SocialMedia became more damaged than a bare foot on 3am Lego. But who is really going to stop our brave UK space engineer, Jemmima Belafonte from occasionally logging into her SpaceBook account this far out in deep space? Even if she still has to deal with the occasional internet troll; what could the harm be?
Somehow it’s the first day of spring in deep space and Pod is full of joy! Jemima however isn’t feeling the happiness and once she discovers the true reality of her engineering qualifications and the threat of a fresh cake from Janet appearing in the supply relay; she feels even worse. However she won’t have to worry about any of that soon, as she is about to face forcible eviction from the Pod! Along with her cardboard toolkit...
In the darkest depths of deep space (just past Uranus) Jemima and Pod find themselves coming across an ad-field. Which it turns out is similar to a minefield, but where as a minefield simply wants to kill you, an ad-field wants to instead beam adverts directly into your brain-hole to blow you away with irresistible bargains! It seems this strange occurrence is somehow linked to the gigantic star cruiser which they’ve also discovered and is now broadcasting a distress signal from someone called ‘Captain Harriet Belafonte’ Families! For people who fail at choosing friends!
Welcome back to Pod To Pluto, our comedy scifi audiodrama about a lonely space engineer on her way to Pluto to turn off a lightbulb. In the first episode of the new series, we find Jemima dreaming of saving the entire galaxy from the evil Lightbulbians. Meanwhile, Pod has come up with a number of interesting ways to celebrate their third glorious year travelling across the solar system together. So they’ve decided to reboot things by redesigning the Pod, buying a little nanobot and in five seconds they’re going to install a new DLC voice pack! This isn’t going to end well, is it?
‘Pod to Pluto’ our very own comedy audiodrama, audiofiction, scifi sitcom returns later this summer for six new episodes in which we’ll finally arrive at Pluto!! The new series (which is written by Peter Richard Adams and stars Laura England and Wayne Russell) will feature dangerous quantum cats, evil sisters, too much cardboard, spacebook social networks and an epic chase across the solar system. Sounds fun doesn’t it? So stay subscribed to this feed and come join us to go turn off a lightbulb!!
Out in deep space on Christmas Eve; devious moon gangsters have seized control of the engineering vessel and taken Jemima hostage! All they want to do is drink a glass of festive Glühwein; steal back an object taken from the garbage belt and then blow-up the ship into a million pieces! But Pod has managed to escape detection and slipped away. Armed only with his Christmas-chicken and mastery of a game called ‘Donkey Balls’, Pod launches his own one-computer war against the moon gangsters to save the day! So join us for this Audiodrama, Audiofiction, Comedy Podcast, Christmas Special of ‘Pod To Pluto’, in which any similarity to the classic yuletide tale of ‘The Die Hard’ is purely intentional!
In deep space, it’s cold, empty and vast. Which means you’re also very unlikely to find any other spacecraft in the outer reaches of the solar system. After all, nobody ever travels this far out from Earth unless they’ve been forced to because of some unfortunate employment offer which they now regret. So the chances of finding another identical space-pod, this far in deep space and then being attacked by it? Well, they’re astronomical! I guess Jemima and Pod should feel lucky then. The current season of ‘Pod To Pluto’ our audio fiction scifi sitcom comes to an end with this explosive new episode. New episodes start again in late 2019
When you’re stuck in your office 24 hours a day for the next five years like space engineer Jemima Belafonte is. You at least know that no matter how dull the days might be, you’ll be earning a sizeable overtime wage. That is, unless you happen to be ‘ring fenced’ in a “challenging but exciting because change is nothing to fear” employment restructure. But what are the chances of that happening? Our scifi space audiodrama sitcom continues today with this new episode. But if Jemima's job is under threat, that must be a good thing for her right? That means she'll have to return home early? Err... Right...?
The story we’re about to tell, is set in the near future and is all about an intrepid, young, handsome, and heroic class 9 service Pod on a dangerous mission to the outer regions of the known galaxy and the only person with him is a dumb human called Jemma. Well, at least that’s how the story develops in the new award-winning novel that Pod has written (which may or may not be based on real life events) So if Pod is now keeping busy via his own literary pursuits, maybe Jemima can find a hobby all of her own? Knitting? Cooking? Boredom? These are all options…
It’s one of the seven wonders of the galaxy! One of the true great sights! A view that has been known to cause strong men, men who have spent their entire life dedicated to the cause of atheism, to fall to their knees and thank God for having been allowed life! So, is this a description of the majesty of Saturn’s rings, or just the glory of a KFC family bucket meal? Pod is getting so glitch these days, it’s hard to tell. Maybe some workplace training will help?
A birthday comes but once a deep space solar cycle for Pod, who was born 23 years ago today! Pod still thinks it looks just as glistening and new as that moment when the Astro Dock Mid-Wifery team handed it to his mummy, who flicked it’s engage button while his father cut the umbilical matrix (it really was horrible what happened to his father). However, Jemima thinks Pod can’t celebrate a birthday, given that it’s nothing but a hulking, almost decrepit mass of pig iron with no soul and no appreciation of the human condition. But if that’s the case, why is everyone so keen to congratulate it today?
Life continues under the blanket of boredom for Jemima, as she endures her long dull journey through deep space on her way to Pluto to go turn off a lightbulb. Yet strangely, she currently seems to be feeling even more exhausted than normal. Could it be that a diet of processed spam, tinned wine and full fat cheese has started to make her feel unwell? Or perhaps her constant shortness of breath might have something to do with all the oxygen around her having a rather strange blue tint. Air shouldn’t look blue; should it?
Things get pretty lonely when you’re two hundred thousand miles away from home. Especially when you’re spending the first of half a decade’s worth of ‘Christmas Eves’ alone with just your sarcastic shipboard AI for company (and a lot of desiccated coconut) So Jemima thinks that maybe explaining the Nativity to Pod will help it understand the holiday a little bit more. She was wrong. Very wrong…
It’s somehow always night-time in deep space, which means there is an awful lot of spare time for Jemima to think about odd random ‘stuff’ whilst trapped alone in the dark empty void. Especially her ‘very long’ distance relationship with her boyfriend Graham. So in this emotional season final of ‘Pod To Pluto’, she tries to contact him and get things nicely sorted out once and for all. Who knows, he might even pop the big question to her!
In deep space; every day feels like a Tuesday for Jemima. That’s because Tuesdays; in all their wretched banal glory, always feel like the most awful of days. So perhaps Jemima should just lie back and talk to somebody about these deep-seated feelings? Would that help? Maybe the lights can be dimmed and some relaxing soft music played? She can start to relax and breathe deeply. Yes, this is much better; she’s starting to enjoy this now… And that’s when Pod starts talking about sex with her mother...
Jemima thinks that Mars is just a barren, dull, lifeless hole. With the only people living there being lonely singing space miners. She says it’s just like a historical Welsh theme park; but with love spoons instead of rollercoasters. Pod is still going to dig a little deeper though, as he loves folk traditions and really wants to hear those funny little miners singing their songs! Yet, Jemima can’t shake the feeling that she’ll end up eating cheese on toast with a stick of leek in her hair... or worse!
It’s time for Jemima to exercise her democratic franchise! However like most elections it’s a two horse race and neither are very tempting. Yet there is one policy that’s rather appealing to her. Johnny December is playing a very home front campaign. Unlike his opponent Hairy Jenny; he’s standing on a ticket of cutting spending by curbing unnecessary space exploration. Jemima feels like she could get behind that (considering she’s currently involved in some unnecessary space exploration) Her shipboard computer ‘Pod’ however, has other ideas...
So, what do you do to pass the time when you’re spending the next five years stuck in a tiny engineering pod? You can only play “Screamy-Screamy-Guessy-Guess” for so long. After all, it won’t take long before you can no longer distinguish a scream of simple competition, to a scream of crushing frustration! So how about a trip to the garbage-belt then? After all, there’s loads of sweet stuff up there. Some people even say it’s the treasure trove of the entire universe. As long as you really like human skulls that is...
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Comments (10)

Alli G

Completely revolting episode. Unsubscribed.

Nov 30th
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Raj Blueheart

Can't wait for Series 3!!❤️ Also, I love this graphic!

Jun 11th
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Raj Blueheart

I really love this podcast! What fun! Never fails to brighten up my day😊

Apr 14th
Reply (1)

Jesse Mazzola

Is there going to be another season?

Apr 12th
Reply (1)

Sophie Reardon Smith

love it so far!

Feb 24th
Reply (1)
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