Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective

Topics include: How do you use a vibrator? Is roleplaying marriage a sin? Will a dildo make me unsatisfied with my husband? Wife makes excuses about everything When to start talking to your kids about sex? Wife caught me watching porn Is masturbation without porn a sin?

The traditional wedding vows go something like "I take you to be my wife/husband, and I do promise and covenant, before God and these witnesses, to be your loving and faithful husband/wife in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live." Unfortunately, I don't remember my wedding vows. I remember picking some. I remember memorizing them. I remember reciting them, from memory, during the wedding, despite having the flu and a fever. But nearly 23 years later, I don't remember what they were. I'm sure they contained something like "in sickness and in health," though. This past month, we got to test those vows.

Well, it’s winter here, which means cold and flu season.  So, of course, the last couple of weeks, it’s been rolling through our family of 7.  Christina and I were the last to get it, and it seemed I got it worse than her.  She complained about being sick but still working out multiple times daily (playing Supernatural on the VR - in case any others are fans).  For me, I was barely making it through my desk job and not making it some days. But at night, we’d crawl into bed, and I was still interested in sex, I think more than usual even - her, not at all.  That made me wonder - what is it about being sick that makes me want sex more? Unfortunately, my head was too fuzzy to research or write an article; here we are, a week later, and I’m ready to tackle it.  So, let’s dig into being sick and sex and why some may want sex when they’re sick, and even more so when they’re sick.

Lately, I've noticed a trend on social media where famous creator couples make videos of the wife telling the husband that visitors are coming over and they need to prepare. In response, the husband goes and starts cleaning out the attic and crawlspace, going through keepsakes, and performing other tasks that do little to achieve the intended goal of getting ready for guests. Of course, they're doing it as a light-hearted joke, but it points to a common conflict in marriages - women often feel they have to ask for the same help repeatedly. Even in the non-hyperbole versions of these videos, the husband typically mows the lawn, cleans the driveway, and fixes issues in the front of the house, such as rewiring a light. In contrast, the wife worries about cleaning the house's interior and preparing food. Invariably, the wife gets upset that he's not helping with what she sees as important tasks. And in media, be it TV, movies, or social media, they all generally side with the wife. The joking videos mentioned above always point and laugh at the men. Why is this? Is it just that men are inept? Are they blind? Inconsiderate? So, here are my ideas of why this happens - which you are welcome to disagree with in the comments.

Topics include: Can I use a strap-on on my wife? My husband’s ex-girlfriend What’s a foreskin for?

I had a wife ask, "Sex should be a gift given freely, and if I don’t have veto power, am I really giving freely?" This is my response in light of 1 Corinthians 7:4-5 and the role model Jesus was for us dying on the cross.

Topics Include: A husband's changing orgasms Can widowers masturbate Husband won't stop masturbation habit Calling husband "daddy" Feeling guilty about initiating sex

Answering the question: Hi Jay, I've noticed a dichotomy when it comes to expectations for male and female sex drives and what's considered desirable sexual performance. As a man, I feel like there's a lot of pressure to perform sexually. This means being able to become sexually aroused when seeing a naked woman (my wife in this case), being able to maintain the erection and having the sexual stamina to keep from climaxing for a sustained interval (not sure what the average woman considers desirable stamina but let's say 10 minutes?) Not to mention the societal pressure that men face when it comes to the size of their penis. I myself feel insecure about not having a large enough penis. Who doesn't want to add a couple of inches to their penis? I've become somewhat perplexed/frustrated because I feel like there are very few expectations placed on females. We live in an age when "all women are supposed to be seen as beautiful." It seems that females are simply expected to be willing to participate in sex when the mood is right, and that's it. There's no expectation on the size or quality of female genitals, no expectation on their ability to get aroused or maintain arousal, and no expectations on the level of physical or mental effort they invest in sexual activity. It seems they are just supposed to be the recipient while the man does the thrusting. Even when it comes to the subject of natural lubrication, there's a stigma around a man who can't naturally achieve and maintain an erection, but for the woman, there doesn't appear to be a stigma around the inability to produce sufficient arousal fluid (vaginal wetness). As it pertains to the topic of pornography, I've read many articles about the dangers of pornography for men, how it leads to sexual desensitization, and when paired with masturbation, decreased sexual stamina and even erectile dysfunction. I can't say I've read many articles discussing how viewing pornography is detrimental for women. Is it just me, or is there a double standard when it comes to sexual expectations for men and women?

Topics include: Sex in heaven Oral sex positions How to recover from an affair I want to become a mom

Topics include: My wife feels disrespected because I notice other women Wife is hurt but not healing after years Wife disconnects during foreplay What can we do during fertile days Oral sex questions Husband doesn't know our anniversary date Should I be worried if I'm late? In-laws over-share about sex Fantasies for couples Low-drive husband Period sex

Topics Include: Crossdressing Reframing "duty" sex Wife gets sex when she wants, but he doesn't Afraid to have more children

One of the most confusing subjects in Christianity is the topic of hell. The popular view is that hell is a place of eternal torment where vengeful God sends you for all of eternity for not obeying Him. People use this belief to try and scare people into being Christians. Let's see what the Bible says about hell. Do people get tortured for eternity? Is it just an infinite existence of everlasting torment? Is God really that sadistic?

Topics include: Wife wants too much sex Couple needs counselling Keep having the same unproductive fight Make boundaries before you start dating Sexy underwear for men

Topics: Is it okay to take nude pictures and videos of each other? Limon by Minna discount Asexual wife? Wife loves me, but isn’t in love with me Wife isn’t interested in improving our sex life Wish I married a bigger butt Secretly feed her ejaculate Husband says my vagina stinks and tastes bad 50-year-old wife refuses to have sex Do we need a counselor?

Topics include: Threesome temptations Aversion to receiving manual and oral sex Penis size Falling asleep during sexy time

Topics: Women use sex to control men, so men should be allowed to masturbate Appreciating beauty vs lusting Playlist for sex Tenuto Squeamish about handjobs Another question about masturbation How do I get my wife to masturbate for me? Is oral sex okay? Are men polygamous by nature?

Topics include: Phone sex Oral sex to completion Forgiveness and trust after betrayal Are pictures and videos a problem? Increasing female libido naturally What is our duty? Toxic wife Abusive employer

Topics include: Does my wife know what I'm doing to her? I want to share orgasms with my husband What are your thoughts on BDSM? Is bondage a problem for me? Wife doesn't like direct clitoral stimulation How do I hold my wife accountable?

Answering this question: Jay, I enjoyed the book (Introduction to Talking Dirty) that my hubby put on my iPad. The thing is, no matter what I do in my comfort zone, it isn't enough. I do many, I mean many, of the examples you use, even the F WORD. How do I get him to be grateful for what I do instead of needing more? I always feel inadequate.

My daughter's speech that the judges decided they couldn't let win because of the topic, but went on to districts despite them.