The EXTRAORDINARY Family Life Podcast

In this episode, it seems as though we start talking about one subject and end with another. Yet, they are connected. We begin discussing how to deal with children who are ‘high spirited’ with minds of their own (which can sometimes be aggravating or embarrassing) and who grow up feeling ‘not good enough’ or as though there’s something wrong with them because of the constant correction they receive. We also mention the ‘quiet’, ‘good’ kids that ‘go along to get along’ but who internally might be (unconsciously) building resentment to the arbitrary rules and restrictions of their parents (which often leads to some sort of rebellion or rejection of values when they become adults). Both types of kids struggle because of the (often arbitrary) rules their parents and/or society have for them. Out of the best intentions, parents create rules for their family life so that children can be safe, they can have high standards and values, and some sort of order and control can be maintained. The rules are often communicated in a black-and-white way — we never eat in the living room, we never stand on the table, we never listen to pop music, we never swear, we never stay out past midnight, we never watch rated R movies, we never lie, etc.  But the reality is, this black-and-white approach has long-term detrimental consequences for your relationship with your child, their critical thinking skills, and their ability to make decisions. That’s because life is rarely black and white. There are variables, nuances, and levels to all parts of our reality. We end the episode by expounding on how allowing your children to ‘talk back’ and to argue/debate with you in an effort to persuade you to their point of view is a GOOD thing. Your rules are NOT black and white and kids (as well as parents) often intuitively feel this, they just can’t articulate it. This is where ‘parenting relativism’ is required. And while that sounds bad or dangerous to some, it is actually an effective approach that helps us help our children to navigate the complexities of the world around us and life in general. At the outset, the approach we outline in this episode seems like more work and thought, and effort on your part. But in the long run — done well — it creates WAY better results because this parenting process develops the ability to think critically, to strategically analyze, to effectively make decisions, and to confront moral dilemmas. As a bonus, it increases the trust and respect your children have for you as their parents and creates stronger life-long relationships. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

In our work with couples and clients, we often come across marriages that are struggling. One of the MANY reasons this happens (or at least continues as an issue) is because of the husband’s inability or lack of skill in listening to his wife effectively in a way that she needs him to. Just as women need to understand a man’s need and desire for sexual intimacy, he needs to understand her need for emotional intimacy. This is challenging because it is often communicated in a way that can be undesirable to men and can sometimes come off as complaining, whining, illogical, irrational, or incorrect. This is something we’ve had to figure out in our own marriage — the best way for Greg to ‘listen’ in a way that produces the results we both want — deeper connection, more intimacy, vulnerability, and security in our relationship and with each other, with the freedom to express feelings that don’t always have to be taken as absolute facts. (Of course, there are other things that Rachel’s had to figure out too in order to better meet her husband’s needs, but we’ve discussed those in previous episodes.) Listening in this way can be challenging and complicated — it seems passive but is actually a very active process. When understood and done well it will transform your marriage relationship (and improve your sex life). Of course, better communication will help in ALL relationships — including the workplace and your community. But listening to your wife in the way we outline in this episode is a whole other level that is very unique to this special relationship. We’ll expound on emotional stacking, on the yin and yang of male/female relationships, why a woman will sometimes say the opposite of what she means, what she really wants you to do instead of ‘fixing’ her problems, how to get through the ugly crying without strangling her, and why all of this is okay and not something either side needs to be ashamed of or shy away from — because what lies on the other side is truly beautiful. Learning to embrace the complexities of female emotion — and to understand that it’s an ocean that sometimes results in a storm — will help you to remain the lighthouse in that storm and will bring greater strength to each partner and to the relationship as a whole. What results is a beautiful circle of intimacy that draws partners together mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically in an eternal loop of intellect, sentiment, passion, and desire — but only if both partners' unique needs are understood, addressed, and accepted. This is a crucial part of the path to true INTIMACY — Into Me You See Get more help with your marriage with the Extraordinary Family Life Formula. Learn more at https://courses.extraordinaryfamilylife.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Every year on our birthdays and anniversaries we love to reminisce and ask ourselves, "Where were we celebrating last year? I wonder where we'll be next year?" Last year we celebrated in Portugal while we were scouting out the country to see if it could be a place we wanted to make a permanent home base. (We did a podcast episode about it because it was so serendipitous.) We could have never guessed then that this year we would be celebrating 22 years together in Turkey on the Aegean Sea! In this episode, we reminisce about the 15 different countries we've celebrated our anniversaries, as well as discuss the principles and strategies we've used to celebrate our marriage -- because your marriage SHOULD be celebrated as often as possible. It's worth doing something 'big', momentous, or festive on special days to make them memorable.  If you haven't done this as part of your marriage then it's time to make a change. Yes, we get it. It's not just about the one special day of the year. Every week you should be dating and every day you should be connecting. But you should also make your anniversary something extra special. Listen to this episode to be inspired on WHY and how to level up your yearly 'honeymoon' trips with your spouse to celebrate your marriage and to reconnect as a man and woman in love. If you feel like you can't do this because you can't afford it or can't leave your kids or ________, then you MUST listen to this episode now. To fully level up your marriage in every aspect and to make it extraordinary, make sure to join our Extraordinary Marriage Masterclass. In the next 30 days, you can have a more Connected, Closer, Peaceful, and Passionate Marriage. It REALLY is possible to create an extraordinary marriage with our 30-Day Step-by-Step Action Plan to an Extraordinary Marriage (with 22 training videos). Take your marriage from 'good' to 'extraordinary' by focusing on 5 simple strategies that anyone can do -- EVEN IF your spouse won't change! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

After episode #211 about What to Eat we received a lot of follow-up questions (thank you!) and were asked to do a follow up episode to clarify some things, such as: What if I'm lactose intolerant? What do you recommend to replace grass-fed milk? What about food storage? I store a lot of grains and legumes. What's the best way to eat them. Where do I find grass-fed meat, cheeses, butters, milk, etc.? How do I know I can trust package labels at the store and that they're actually what they say they are? How do you eat healthily while traveling? What do you recommend for nutrient-dense snacks? Do you guys eat much bread? How do I get my family on board with eating healthier? Do you have any recipes? What can I cook daily at home that's easy and can be done quickly? What do you regularly buy and WHERE do you buy it? If you had similar questions after listening to episode #211, then get them answered by listening to this episode now! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Thanks for all of the questions! They help us to have relevant conversations in these podcast episodes. If you have a question about anything in life or family, send them to support@extraordinaryfamilylife.com This week’s question is related to full-time family travel vs. home base travel but the answer is relevant for all of us — it’s principle-based and applicable to every area of life. So if you’re not a full-time family traveler, you still need to listen to this episode because you’re likely experiencing something similar in one or more areas of your life. Many of us think that balance means equal. But really, contrast — the yin and yang — is more accurate to how we develop. It’s why we have two hemispheres in our brain and it’s why we need ‘opposition’ in all things. It is how we find meaning and purpose in our life. But the challenge is we sabotage ourselves. We don't want to let go of what we know to puruse something different, especially when we feel like what we have is 'right'. We want to stay with the familiar, we don’t want to ‘betray’ ourselves by ‘flip-flopping’ between ideas, beliefs, or lifestyles. We identify with this thing and it’s become a part of who we are, so if we change them or open our minds to something opposite, what will that do to our life, family, marriage, etc? The truth is, we NEED to do that in order to become complete, whole, and fully developed. We NEED to explore the ‘other side’. That’s how we reach our full potential and become our full, complete selves. This is what we call ‘walking the labyrinth' — exploring every area of yourself, life, etc. in order to become fully whole and complete. But it seems scary, risky, or even wrong and ‘inappropriate’ — yet it is psychologically, biologically, mentally, and physically accurate and demonstrably true. Try it out and see for yourself. You’ll find more benefits, power, development and reach more of your personal and family potential. Listen now to learn HOW. Book mentioned: The Master and His Emissary See a photo of the labyrinth here. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

In many of our episodes, we often reference food and its connection to behavior and emotion. So it’s not surprising that we received this request: “I would LOVE to hear an episode on food! YES it is confusing and hard to navigate! We've already made some good changes, but I'd love to hear your specific thoughts about how you implement this both at home and on the road. I'd also love to hear some scientific evidence from books but mainly how you guys apply it… especially when your kids when they are surrounded by all the not-so-good-foods of their peers... And I got confused: Rachel said, in the same breath when talking about bad foods/chemicals, almond and soy milk, and then whole foods....meaning those milks are considered bad or good?! I think your intention was that those milks are bad...I didn't know that!” It’s true, I did mention in a previous episode that soy and almond milks are not good for you. In this episode, I expound how and why we came to those — as well as other ‘shocking’ — conclusions about our definition of what’s healthy and what is not. If you’ve ever wondered ‘what to eat’ and what is actually healthy, then you don’t want to miss this episode. At the very least it will provide some ‘food for thought’. 😁 --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

We truly love receiving emails and questions from followers, clients, and listeners because it gives us specific situations and challenges to address. We’ve learned that even though we (as humans) often feel that we’re the ‘only one’ dealing with a problem or circumstance, the truth is, we’ve discovered, if it’s happening to one person it’s likely happening to hundreds of others as well. That’s why we answer these questions in a podcast episode so that it doesn’t just help the person who asked, but the hundreds of others who did not ask who are facing similar circumstances. Today’s question is very relevant to young mothers and fathers especially. I remember feeling this way when I had four children under the age of four, and five children under the age of eight. But let me share her words: Where I am: I feel swamped with homeschooling 5 kids age 10 and under (one with severe special needs), have a scarcity mindset about my time like I’ll never have enough time to do everything, and I’m too stressed keeping the home running to connect with my awesome kids regularly.  I don’t always appreciate my spouse for his efforts, and I snap when he shows the least impatience or force with the children. I want to have even more kids but feel I don’t have the capacity.  So I’m taking a year off by using birth control which we didn’t really want to do, but I didn’t have the discipline to follow through with NFP last time we got pregnant so this is my way to try to get healthy.  Want to get my body and brain both healthy. I don’t get to play my music enough which usually inspires me. I want to mentor my kids, but I parent with commands and emotions. I want to honor and follow God, but I find myself demonstrating before my kids how I don’t trust he will take care of my feelings and their behaviors when I snap due to kids not obeying. Thinking about putting this program (Family Charts & Systems) in my budget soon and signing up: I have a parenting program from a religious source which isn’t really the influence I want in our home (we’re another sect), but I needed tools to help me be consistent so husband and I went for it anyway.  It’s maybe helping but not producing enough softness and grace in me and my husband  for my taste Where I want to go: joy, music, beautiful feelings in the home, smoothness even when a small child is in tantrum mode, trust spouse’s methods with the kids, kids do their school because they want to rather than because I made them. There is so much here for all of us to relate to. And the vision of where you want to go is NOT a pipe dream. It IS possible to achieve with the right tools and strategies.  So let’s dive into the principles and practices that work for turning this situation around. Listen to this episode now to learn how. ---- As a mompreneur and homeschooling, world-traveling mother of seven children, SYSTEMS have played a HUGE role in keeping me sane... and in helping me be more peacefully productive and present. If you would like some help bringing order to your family chaos with systems and charts, then make sure to pick up my Family Charts & Systems program which includes training videos and done-for-you editable and printable charts and systems. Your future self with thank you. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

We received another question from a mom who was interested in joining my Family Charts & Systems course and community. In an email I sent out, it said: As a mother of seven children, my life seriously changed forever once I learned how to FINALLY get organized. So when moms tell me they don't have a system for chores or study time, I'm like... "Say what?!" I get it. Some of you don't like systems. You'd rather live free-flowing and in the moment. I was that mom too, about ten years ago. But then I discovered the incomparable power of having family systems and it changed my life and family. Systems bring sanity. Systems teach responsibility. Systems provide accountability. Systems empty your plate so you can focus on the things YOU want to do as a PERSON. Systems help you be a better parent. Systems help your children learn adult skills. She responded saying, “This email sounds great about systems, BUT here's the question since I have made TONS of attempts at making systems that work... how does one get one's children on board? It works for a little while, but seemingly not long term or maybe it doesn't work. I feel pretty tired of trying out other people's systems just to have them NOT work for us. …does your system product include how to help with motivation/cooperation/etc? Also does it help people who have a hard time following other peoples' plans?!?! lol, because I think that may be why I have struggled.” If you’ve ever felt similarly to this mom, then you don’t want to miss this. In it, we explain why SYSTEMS are everything. You are ALREADY using systems, they just might be ineffective ones. Learning to use effective systems will TRANSFORM your family life. We’ll expound on why and HOW. How do you get your kids on board — and how do you do it without damaging relationships? How do you motivate them and get them to want to cooperate? What do you do if and WHEN the systems stop working (we also explain why this happens and that it is completely normal). And for those of you who believe you don’t want or need systems because you prefer to ‘live in the moment or go with the flow’ — I get it. I used to be that person too.  But we’ll explain how effective systems actually bring MORE freedom and that you’re actually restricted and limited by your ineffective systems and they’re keeping you from doing the things you REALLY want to do. If you’ve ever felt frustrated by the systems or seeming lack of them in your home and family — or have wondered why your systems and charts ‘never work’ — or how to get your kids (and spouse) motivated and on board — then listen to this episode now!  As a mompreneur, homeschooling, world-traveling mother of 7 children, systems have played a HUGE role in keeping me sane and peacefully productive. Great systems reduce stress. If you would like help creating charts and systems from someone who has done it (me) then snag my Family Charts & Systems. Done for you, editable and printable. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Welcome to today’s episode, we’re coming to you from Vienna, Austria this time. We just finished leading a WWII trip where we learned about the start of the war with the invasion of Warsaw, visited Auschwitz & Birkenau concentration camps, and explored Krakow and Vienna. We love to receive questions from listeners, coaching clients, and members of the Extraordinary Family Life Formula. One question we’ve received more than once in the last month is about misbehavior in young children. What do I do when my four-year-old acts out? They will purposely interrupt what their siblings are doing and disturb the peace. They’ll lash out, and it’s becoming violent lately. They’re even getting destructive and destroying things and are into everything.  They keep interrupting the home education and family routines, and they’re extremely jealous of the new baby. They won’t listen to either parent and they’re becoming a disturbing force in the family. What do we do about it? If you’ve ever had a child misbehave, especially if it happens consistently, then you want to listen to this episode. We discuss WHY misbehavior occurs — in children AND adults. Understanding the crucial framework of the cause of behavior vs. symptoms of behavior (aka the acting out) is crucial in creating a happy family life. It also can help you to understand why your teens or spouse do the things they do. We also address specific strategies for responding to, stopping, and preventing misbehavior. We explain why what you’ve tried so far isn’t working, and what will work instead. If you’ve ever felt frustrated by the misbehavior of one or more of your children and want to put an end to it, then listen to this episode now! It will transform your family life. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

You might not realize it, but as a parent, YOU have a moral obligation to make sure that your child (or children) are NOT annoying. Why? Because in order for your children to function normally in the world — and to have a healthy, happy life — they need to be able to interact effectively in society. They can’t do this if they haven’t gained the skills of social interaction. One of the major signs (at any age) that they’re lacking these skills is if they have annoying behavior. If your children are annoying to you, they’re also annoying to others. And that’s a problem. If a young child develops annoying behavior (we discuss WHY this happens in the episode) they don’t fully understand WHY others find them annoying. And so they grow up knowing that people don’t like them but not understanding why they’re not liked. This is psychologically unhealthy. If you want your child to be able to develop healthy, long-lasting relationships with others — which is essential for a life of happiness and fulfillment — then they must learn the skills of effective human interaction. And it’s your job as a parent to teach them. This is not about conforming to social norms and expectations or worrying about what other people think. It’s about developing solid principle-based social leadership skills. If you have children who have annoying behavior now or might have annoying behavior in the future, then you need to listen to this episode now. In it, we share specific strategies and principle-based techniques for helping children — and adults — develop healthy self-and-social leadership skills. If you’ve ever felt the desire to have more influence with your children and their behavior, then you don’t want to miss this! ----- If you would like to help your teen or young adult develop holistically — including developing social skills and reducing annoying behavior — then make sure to register them for our Habits for a Successful Life online class. Because we recognized that the healthiest and happiest people on the planet are well-rounded in their development — mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, social, and financial — we wanted to ensure that our teens would learn how to develop in each of these areas. We couldn’t find classes that taught them how to do these things — including developing leadership skills — so we created our own based on our decades of research into peak performance and human development. That is what the Habits for a Successful Life class is all about. And teens LOVE it. It becomes one of their favorite classes — ever! And it helps them to develop better habits and an understanding of themselves, human psychology, and the ingredients for creating a happy life. Click the link to learn more now and to read the reviews of students and parents. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Welcome to the podcast! We’re coming to you from Warsaw, Poland. Our kids are on the other side of town in an Airbnb and we’re spending the weekend at a luxury hotel to celebrate Greg’s 45th birthday. (Please excuse any sounds of the city such as sirens, etc.) There is a philosophy in parenting and education (perhaps started by TJED) that states ‘Inspire, Not Require’. The idea is that instead of requiring your children or students to do things — chores, reading, studies, being kind — you inspire them to do it through your actions and example. But does that mean that there is NEVER a time to require anything?  As one mom put it,  “While I love the idea of inspiring and think it is the best way in the end, does it mean that there is no room for requirements? Do we not need to set boundaries and expectations (is that similar to requirements) for our youth? If not, what do you do in the meantime when you aren't so great at inspiring? And if there is a need for both, how do you navigate that field (especially if you are really good at the requiring part)? This is what we expound on in this episode. We discuss inspiration as a force in your life and the lives of your children to move you to action. We explain how to feed the fire of inspiration in your family life so that you can take the action required to do the things you want and need to do to create the life you dream of and to become the people you want to become. Proper inspiration invites your children to decide for themselves to do the work they need to reach their dreams. It’s intrinsic instead extrinsic — and it will carry into their adult life. But we also explain when and how requiring is needed. We share specific strategies for setting boundaries, expectations, and how to go about ‘requiring’ things in the right way instead of through punishments, manipulation, discipline, or harshness. If you want your children to be guided by an inner knowing that motivates them to proper action, now and when they grow up, then listen to this episode now. `------ If you would like to help INSPIRING your teen or young adult to develop positive habits and better attitudes in a holistic way then make sure to register them for our Habits for a Successful Life online class. Because we recognized that the healthiest and happiest people on the planet are well-rounded in their development — mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, social, and financial — we wanted to ensure that our teens would learn how to develop in each of these areas. We couldn’t find classes that taught them how to do that so we created our own based off of our decades of research into peak performance and human development. That is what the Habits for a Successful Life class is all about.  And teens LOVE it. It becomes one of their favorite classes — ever! And it helps them to develop better habits and an understanding of themselves, human psychology, and the ingredients for creating a happy life. Click the link to learn more now and to read the reviews of students and parents. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

We’re coming to you today from the city of Vilnius, Lithuania. We have loved traveling through the Baltic States. Today we’re going to continue answering some questions (since we were accidentally cut short in the last episode). We were asked about certain types of activities and whether or not our children participate in them because of our unique lifestyle. For example, ballet, piano, gymnastics, sports, and other activities that require mastery. In this episode, we discuss the pros and cons — the exchange rate — of the choices we’ve made and how that plays into mastery or skills. We philosophize about the breadth of exposure versus the depth of mastery.  Is one approach better? Healthier? Lead to greater happiness? If you study the lives of great masters — in current times and throughout history — you often find a train wreck of broken relationships and mental and emotional disasters. That’s often because their development has been ‘lopsided’ — an emphasis on the ‘one thing’ they’re mastering, instead of a well-rounded development. Our focus has been on developing holistic mastery of well-being — mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, social, and financial.  We expound on how and why we do that in this episode. ---- If you would like to help your teen or young adult develop holistically then make sure to register them for our Habits for a Successful Life online class. Because we recognized that the healthiest and happiest people on the planet are well-rounded in their development — mental, emotional, physical, spiritual, social, and financial — we wanted to ensure that our teens would learn how to develop in each of these areas. We couldn’t find classes that taught them how to do that so we created our own based off of our decades of research into peak performance and human development. That is what the Habits for a Successful Life class is all about. And teens LOVE it. It becomes one of their favorite classes — ever! And it helps them to develop better habits and an understanding of themselves, human psychology, and the ingredients for creating a happy life. Click the link to learn more now and to read the reviews of students and parents.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Welcome to a New Year! We’re keeping the Denning family dream alive with family adventures. In December, we traveled through NYC, Norway, Denmark, Sweden, Finland, & Estonia. We’ve had some questions about the logistics of traveling with a family which we’re going to discuss in this episode. How do we do it? What do we do with our stuff? How do we make it work? We also get philosophical and talk about how travel has been a tool for helping us (and our children) to become assets (instead of just having assets). We explain why we believe that travel is one of the ‘non-negotiables’ for becoming well-educated. Warren Buffet once said that the very BEST investment you can make is in yourself. This episode explains how travel is an investment in the development of yourself and your children. And along the way, we give tips, strategies, and answers to questions about how we have done it with seven children during the past 16 years. ----- If you’re interested in learning more about creating an Extraordinary Family Life then make sure to sign up for our Extraordinary Family Life Formula Membership. It includes 250 hours of video content and training from Greg & Rachel Denning on marriage, parenting, family culture, lifestyle design, mastering (and earning more) money, plus so much more! You'll also get meet with us LIVE once per month. Click the link for a special discount. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Greg and I are still in Norway. We are in the midst of our 2nd Norway trip. The first took place in Tromsø, 225 miles north of the Arctic Circle where we fed reindeer, went dog sledding, and saw the Northern Lights while cruising the harbor. Our 2nd trip spans from Oslo to Flåm to Bergen and back where we’re cruising fjords, taking spectacular train rides, and learning about Viking and Hanseatic history. This week’s podcast is audio is taken from an exclusive presentation we did for a paid summit. It discusses the strategies we have used to create a truly ‘happily ever after’ marriage. Many people don’t know that extraordinary marriages are possible because they have never been exposed to them. But living ‘happily ever after’ is possible. That doesn’t mean you’ll be free from challenges or obstacles. But you can learn how to use them to bring you closer and to strengthen your relationship. In this episode, Greg and I outline some of the ingredients to creating a happily ever after marriage. What does it actually take? We’ll outline it for you here. If you’re interested in learning more about creating an Extraordinary Marriage then make sure to sign up for our Extraordinary Marriage Masterclass. It includes a 30-Day action plan, a 9-day challenge, and over 20 hours of video content. Click this link for a special discount. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

Hey everybody! Greg and I are in Oslo, Norway with our family, recovering from jet lag. In a few hours, we fly to Tromsø, 220 miles north of the Arctic Circle. Tomorrow begins our first Norway trip where 18 other people will be joining us for reindeer sledding, dog sledding, and the Northern Lights. (Check out our 2023 travel schedule and join us here!) This week’s podcast is audio taken from our most recent coaching session for the Extraordinary Family Life Formula. We discussed why boys and men (young and old) turn to video games and virtual worlds — and what to do about it. We discuss why gaming addictions are a problem for all of society — and specifically for your family — and the long-term consequences they can have. We explain how technology has improved as well as the understanding and use of human psychology to make them increasingly more addictive. We share specific strategies for preventing and overcoming gaming addictions.  We also review the unique human needs boys and men have that are not being fulfilled at school or in the community, which results in driving boys and men even more to virtual worlds. If you have boys or men, young or old, in your life, or daughters who will date and marry men — then listen now to this episode regarding a crucial topic that is a growing epidemic. This episode also gives you a glimpse into what our monthly coaching sessions are like with the Extraordinary Family Life Formula. If you would like to join us live, then click the link for a special discount. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

We like to get our podcast topics from issues that really ‘fire us up’ (it makes for better discussions). This week, I was fired up by some comments left on an Instagram Reel I created about allowing ‘boys to be boys’ with audio taken from our recent Workshop on Boys Adrift — The Growing Epidemic of Undermotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men. Some of them said things like: This post really misses the mark. The toxicity that exists around masculinity has nothing to do with children having access to messy, risk-taking behavior. I agree that this is problematic for children — but it is not in anyway linked to masculinity. You clearly don’t know what you’re talking about. What about girls and non-binary people? You don’t think this issues effect them too? Why don’t you do a post about that? Why are you posting something on Instagram if you’re not interested in receiving advice or feedback? You’re attitude is toxic. Kids should be kids. Girls DO get messy and wild outdoors… the phrase ‘boys will be boys’ is extremely problematic having been used for so long to excuse poor behavior towards women. Your post conflates ‘masculinity’ with ‘toxic masculinity’ which are two totally different things. Society is rejecting sexism, rudeness, entitlement and lack of accountability — the types of toxic masculinity you mention are totally using the phrase in an inappropriate context. In this episode, Greg and I discuss these comments and address why this ‘movement’ regarding ‘toxic masculinity’ does have a direct downstream effect on some of the issues we’re seeing with boys and young men today being unmotivated and turning to video games as a way to find meaning and purpose in their lives. It’s all connected. And we also explain how masculinity and femininity are neither good nor bad, toxic nor harmless. Like a hammer or any other tool, they’re neutral. It’s the way they are used by the individual person that determines their toxicity or validity. If you have boys or men, young or old, in your life -- or girls who will have relationships with men one day -- then listen now to this episode regarding a topic that hasn’t yet ‘peaked’ in significance before it’s reversed or corrected. ---- If you enjoy this episode — or any of our episodes — would you please do us a favor and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or on our website at podcast.extraordinaryfamilylife.com When you leave us a rating and review it helps to make this world a better place by getting this podcast to get into the ears of more parents — the molders and shapers of future generations. We all need all the help we can get to be the best people and parents we can. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

"My husband and I have been struggling a great deal in our marriage, mostly over parenting issues. We have specifically been struggling with our 13 year old daughter who told us she is gay." Many emails and questions we receive from parents begins with something like this statement above. Spouses are struggling in their marriage, and it's often because of disagreements in parenting approaches or issues they're facing with their children that they're not sure how to handle. They will tell us things like: I feel he is too harsh in his parenting and he feels I am too lenient. I know my spouse cares about our children and is trying in his own way to do what's right, but he's driving her away from us and away from God. My wife is being too permissive but when I tell her the arguments begin. My spouse is overly harsh in the way he speaks to my children. I don’t believe in divorce but I’m not willing to give in and lose my daughter over this. But parenting differences aside, there's also a growing concern for children and parents during this seemingly complicated and confusing time where as a society we're trying to (re)define things as 'basic' as sex and gender. Are our children being caught up in societal shifts? Can things like suicide, depression, or being gay become ‘trendy’?  What are the statistical chances a child could be gay, and how do we respond to that if they are?  What are the best ways to approach issues like these with our children —and to effectively deal with them when they arise in a way that prevents unhealthy parent/child relationships? What's the most psychologically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally healthy approach for our kids? If you have children and have had or will have any concerns about these issues, then don’t miss this important episode! Listen now. ---- This episode is sponsored by The Extraordinary Family Life Formula. Discover specific strategies and tools for becoming the best parent you can be. Improve your parenting skills with learning and practice as a member of The Formula. PLUS get access to the hundreds of hours of past recorded Workshops on topics such as How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids and The Real Reason Your Kids Won’t Do What You Say. And as a member of The Formula you’ll also get to meet LIVE on Zoom with Greg and me every month. Click the link to learn more. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

I remember the first time I realized that humanity’s desire for luxury was actually a driving force for improving the world. Previous to that I often felt that wanting luxury and comfort was wrong or bad… perhaps from generations of Puritanism passed down through religion and culture? But as I lay in the comfort of a luxurious hotel room feeling perfectly at home, I finally understood that this desire was a positive thing. Without (a woman’s?) desire for indoor plumbing, a comfy bed, and the ease of flipping a switch to produce light or heat, we probably wouldn’t be enjoying all of these luxuries right now as a society. It is our innate drive for comfort (aka luxury) that drives human progress. Yet with every strength there is an inherit weakness. There is a downside to pursuing comfort and luxury at the expense of all else. And it results in becoming ‘soft & squishy’ and unable to face the challenges ahead of us. Does that mean we give up our lives of comfort? Perhaps for some. But for all of us, it means that we intentionally add ‘pressure’ to our lives in a way that strengthens our mental, emotional, and physical muscles allowing us to ‘keep our edge’ and to prepare for hard times (which are coming). Listen now! --- This episode is sponsored by The Extraordinary Family Life Formula. Discover specific strategies and tools for creating a family life that is better than great -- it's extraordinary. PLUS get access to the hundreds of hours of past recorded Workshops on topics such as How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids and The Real Reason Your Kids Won’t Do What You Say. And as a member of The Formula you’ll also get to meet LIVE on Zoom with Greg and Rachel every month. Click here to learn more. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

We’ve been asked several times over the years by coaching clients and others regarding masturbation. Specifically, they want to know how to approach masturbation in general — with their children or teens, and in their marriage. Is it normal for teens to masturbate? What are the side effects or outcomes? And what about in marriage? Is masturbation okay or normal, especially if your sex drive doesn't match up with your spouse? We’ve also been asked by young adults and college students IF or WHY some of these things are so “wrong” — masturbation, mutual masturbation, or other sexual acts — at least they’re not having sex. These are the type of questions we answer in this unique episode which is intended to help you navigate masturbation and the sex drive — before and during marriage — with the healthiest psychological approaches to these topics. A correct understanding of these forces and practices will help you to better build the life of meaning, fulfillment, and purpose that you’re striving to create for yourself and your families (future or present). Listen now! ---- This episode is sponsored by the Extraordinary Family Life Formula. Discover a place where you can have conversations about difficult subjects with people you trust who have experience and the results that you want. PLUS get access to the hundreds of hours of past recorded Workshops on topics such as How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids and The Real Reason Your Kids Won’t Do What You Say. And as a member of The Formula, you’ll also get to meet LIVE on Zoom with Greg and me every month. Click the link to learn more: https://courses.extraordinaryfamilylife.com/courses/extraordinary-family-life-formula?ref=ea1ded --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

We’ve all had the experience of being around someone who’s grumpy — even our spouse or children — and then soon we’re feeling grumpy as well. A mother of multiple children recently asked us, “When the people around me (aka my children) are grumpy, negative, or ‘down’, how do I not let that affect me?” Negative emotions and grumpiness are inevitable and a normal part of life. But when those around you are moody or grumpy, how do you keep that from bringing you ‘down’ as well? Is it possible to stay happy or positive in such cases? And if so, HOW? And is it possible to positively influence those around you so that they can better process their negative emotions and return more quickly to a positive state? With deliberate intention and focus it IS possible to become the ‘rising tide that lifts all boats’. YOU can become a great force for good in your family and develop the skill of maintaining positivity — — not fake, masked happiness, but true, appropriate positive emotion that becomes a stabilizing force in your most important relationships. This episode is very real and relevant to anyone who has to interact regularly with people who aren’t always happy. Which is especially needed if you’re married or have children (or plan to one day). Make sure to listen until the end where we discuss: “How do you want your children to remember you emotionally?” “What kind of person do your children see you as?” “What emotional memory will they have of you?” We discuss all this and more in this practical discussion between parents of 7 children with 20 years of experience. If you enjoy this episode — or any of our episodes — would you please do us a favor and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or on our website at podcast.extraordinaryfamilylife.com When you leave us a rating and review it helps to make this world a better place by getting this podcast to get into the ears of more people and parents — the molders and shapers of future generations. We all need all the help we can get to be the best people and parents we can be. Families with thriving parents raise thriving children who grow up to have a positive impact on their families and communities, which leads to better nations and a better world. You can make an impact by taking a minute to share the podcast with someone who will benefit from it, and by leaving a rating and review. And make sure to follow us on Instagram if you’re not already. You can find us @worldschoolfamily or @greg.denning Thank you so much for listening. We appreciate you. But let’s get into this useful and much-needed episode! ------ This episode is sponsored by The Extraordinary Family Life Formula and our Workshop on Teaching Children to Manage Their Emotions. Discover specific strategies and tools for managing emotions personally and modeling emotional management for your children. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message