Claim Ownership

Author:

Subscribed: 0Played: 0
Share

Description

 Episodes
Reverse
After experiencing multiple instances of sexual assault, Julia often feels sexually disconnected from her own body. She wants to be aware of her boundaries and find pleasure in new relationships going forward. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Jamila Dawson, licensed marriage and family therapist, and August McLaughlin, health and sexuality journalist and host of Girl Boner Radio. Together they wrote With Pleasure: Managing Trauma Triggers for More Vibrant Sex and Relationships. They share candid, tangible advice about navigating consent and how to turn awkward conversations into something empowering — even sexy.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Talk to Your Son About Sex”. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
How To Be a Lazy Genius

How To Be a Lazy Genius

2022-05-1034:381

When Samantha and her husband moved from a condo to a fairly large house, they knew they’d have a lot of updating and upkeep to do. But they had no idea how much time their new chores would gobble up. Or even what chores to do. (If only there was a guide to adulting!) Even when they weren’t holding themselves to picture-perfect standards, it still felt like they were barely keeping their heads above water. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Kendra Adachi, she’s a best-selling author, podcaster, and professional permission giver. She has tangible, easy steps that you can do right now to help you prioritize and organize your mess—and ultimately, your life.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Stop “Having It All” (Before You End Up With Nothing)”  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
When Betsy joined her last workplace, she thought it was a perfect fit. It was on a list of Best Places to Work and she got to be creative while helping people. But as the startup rapidly grew, the company culture changed and Betsy started to lose herself amid the stress. Then she got laid off. Honestly, Betsy was relieved, but now she’s gotta figure out what’s next. On this episode of How To!, we bring on James Altucher, author, podcaster, and all-around interesting person. He’s both created successful companies and failed a number of times. He has some funny, frank advice for taking the sting out of rejection, reviving your passions, and making sure your next move is right for you.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Advance Your Career by Quitting Your Job.”  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Thanks Avast.com! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
When the Taliban took over Afghanistan in August, the Female Tactical Platoon, a unit of elite Afghan soldiers, knew they had to evacuate. “If they were captured, they would be killed,” according to a Green Beret who worked alongside them because they were “an affront to everything the Taliban stood for.” Ellie, a U.S. Army Captain, moved earth and heaven to get them to America. But navigating the U.S. refugee resettlement system proved much more difficult than they expected. On this episode of How To!, we introduce Ellie to Luma Mufleh, founder and CEO of Fugee Families, to discuss how the system can and should be improved. They share practical tips for how all of us can help in the most useful way possible.   To read more about the Female Tactical Platoon check out The Untold Story of the Afghan Women Who Hunted the Taliban.  Here is Ellie’s organization: Sisters of Service.  Here is Luma’s organization: Fugee Families. Check out Luma’s new book, Learning America.   If you liked this episode, check out “How To Beat Your Hidden Biases” Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The town of Dartmouth, Massachusetts is in the middle of a mascot debate that’s escalated quickly. Our listener Keith grew up there and his kids attend the high school in question. He’s been vocal about his support for changing the school’s Indian warrior logo but is wondering if there’s a better way to solve this issue than trading barbs with the opposition. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Maulian Dana, Penobscot Nation tribal ambassador, one of the four federally recognized indigenous tribes in Maine. Maulian helped lead a decades-long effort that resulted in Maine banning all state schools and colleges from using Native American mascots in 2019. She has some practical tips to help Keith, and all of us, fight for what we believe in — without tearing our community apart.   If you liked this episode, check out “How To Stop a Fight Before It Starts.” Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
When Mike was wracked with a series of unexplained headaches in 2017, he initially chalked it up to being a stressed out grad student. But the pain became debilitating and his symptoms only multiplied from there. His doctors are stumped and Mike doesn't know where to turn next. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Meghan O’Rourke, author of The Invisible Kingdom: Reimagining Chronic Illness. Meghan has been on her own medical journey for years and has some extremely helpful advice for finding the right doctors, regaining a sense of normalcy, and supporting those who are currently searching for answers.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Fight Outrageous Medical Bills.”  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
You’ve probably heard about the importance of journaling, putting thoughts on paper to help process the daily vicissitudes of life. But it’s easy to stall once you see a blank page or get self conscious about what exactly you’re writing. On this episode of How To!, we bring together Anna Quindlen, bestselling novelist and author of the new book Write For Your Life, and John Dickerson, co-host of Slate’s Political Gabfest, CBS News reporter, author and veteran journaler. They share their wit and wisdom on how to start writing about your personal life — and how to keep it going amid all the distractions. (And stay tuned after the credits for an exclusive sneak peek of Anna Quindlen’s next novel). If you liked this episode, check out “How To Write a Bestseller” and “How To Get Your Book Published.” Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Thanks Avast.com! Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
If you were to pop by Mary Ann’s PhD discussion group, you’d most likely find her quietly, but intently, listening to the debate going on around her. But when it comes time to actually throw in her two cents, she comes up short. She feels nervous. Her mind goes blank. And she leaves the session feeling frustrated that she didn’t voice her thoughts. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Amy Cuddy, author of Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenge. Amy has done a great deal of research on how to carve out your own space — physically and mentally — and has some practical tips to help Mary Ann, and all of us, speak with more confidence.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Give a Killer Speech.” Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
When a fellow employee started bullying Christy at her workplace she took the situation to her supervisor, Human Resources, and even filed grievances with her union. But the situation never improved. In fact, it got worse to the point where Christy had no choice but to walk away from her job of over 30 years. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Megan Hunter – co-founder and CEO of High Conflict Institute and author of BIFF at Work: Your Guide to Difficult Workplace Communication. She offers insight into the bullying Christy experienced and shares advice for anyone who might be in a similar situation. “We just have to know the rules and then we can manage that relationship instead of having that person and their fear-driven operating system manage us,” Megan says. With input from Christy, Megan sheds light on how to handle a toxic work environment. If you liked this episode, check out: How To Fire a Bad Employee Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
After Zach heard our “How To Make Friends as an Adult” episode, which coincidentally featured all women, he and a few other male listeners wrote in questioning how useful it was for men. He wondered if we could address the unique challenges men face when it comes to making new friends. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Slate staff writers Dan Kois, author of How to Be a Family, and Aymann Ismail, former host of the podcast Man Up, to coach Zach through a few easy tips. “You just gotta be shameless about it,” says Dan. Whether it’s balancing parenthood or playing the numbers game, Dan and Aymann share practical ways to put yourself out there, even if it means being a little bit vulnerable.  If you liked this episode, check out How To Put Your Wife's Career First.  Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. Podcast production by Derek John, Rosemary Belson, and Katie Shepherd. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Courtenay has more than a few regrets, starting with her career. Despite her accomplishments as an opera singer, she wishes she’d prioritized her professional goals, become more proficient on the piano and with foreign languages. Then there are the personal regrets, like the elderly friend Courteney lost touch with — who then passed away. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Daniel H. Pink, author of The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward, to coach Courtenay through reclaiming her regrets. “We haven't taught people how to properly deal with negative emotions,” Pink reminds us. We’ll learn about the four core regrets that most of us share and how to turn them into wisdom.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Uproot Your Life.” Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen. Podcast production by Derek John, Rosemary Belson and Katie Shepherd. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Janey is the very definition of a woman trying to “have it all.” She’s an occupational therapist by day, a ghost writer for influencers by night and in between co-hosts a podcast. On top of that, she has two sons who play travel sports and a husband who works long hours. It’s left Janey wondering if she’ll ever catch her breath. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Amy Westervelt, who’s no slouch herself. She’s a journalist, host of the award-winning podcast Drilled, a busy mom and author of the book Forget “Having It All”: How America Messed Up Motherhood, and How to Fix It. She shares with Janey how trying to “have it all” almost left her with nothing. It’s advice that all of us can use to rebalance our lives and reprioritize what’s important.  Check out Amy’s invisible labor calculator.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Advance Your Career By Quitting Your Job.”  Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Winning the Olympics is everything Steve Mesler ever wanted. So when he and his U.S. bobsled teammates stood atop the podium at the 2010 Vancouver Games, his life seemed golden in every way. But soon after his triumph, Steve began to experience a period of extended mourning. Even though he won a gold medal, he lost his identity and sense of purpose. And he wasn't the only one. On this episode of How To!, the former Olympian, co-founder of Classroom Champions, and current United States Olympic and Paralympic Committee board member talks about the complicated aftermath of achieving an all-consuming pursuit. He discusses his struggles with depression, losing teammates to suicide and what the USOPC is doing to destigmatize mental health treatment. (This episode originally aired July 20, 2021) If you liked this episode, check out: “How To Be a Badass On and Off the Court.” Do you have an Olympic-sized problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
It’s been two decades since Maggie’s mom has gone to the doctor and her health is incredibly….shaky. Maggie’s mom has severe asthma and allergies which has basically isolated her from the world. With isolation has come anger and bitterness. Maggie is at a loss. She’s tried everything she can think of yet her mother refuses to get help. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Elizabeth Berg, a nurse-turned-bestselling novelist who has penned some 30 books, many focusing on family drama. Her latest is a touching memoir called I’ll Be Seeing You, which follows her perfectly imperfect parents as they’ve gotten older. Elizabeth has some hard-earned wisdom for Maggie, and all of us, about navigating a contentious relationship with our aging parents.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Embrace Your Anti-Vax Family This Holiday Season” and “How To Get a Stubborn Parent to Listen.” Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Susan was concerned when she first learned that someone was impersonating her on Facebook, but that soon turned to anger when she realized the imposter had sent inappropriate photos to her real life friends. Susan tried and failed to get the account taken down. Then came the extortion letter...and now she’s freaking out a bit. On this episode of How To!, Jack Rhysider, host of Darknet Diaries and cybersecurity veteran, talks about the time he was stalked on the internet. Jack no longer shares much online — he won’t even show his face. You don't have to go that far, but there are things you can do to protect your online data and your emotions in real life. If you’re worried about being exposed, Jack has some great resources for battling stalkers and online harassment. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Steal Back Your Identity.”  Do you have a hacker horror story with a happy ending? Or some other problem we can help solve? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Last week we learned about using the four different styles of humor to your advantage, and who makes a good target for a joke. But what if you read the room wrong and absolutely bomb? On this episode of How To!, the second in a two-part series, we resume our conversation with Naomi Bagdonas, co-author of Humor, Seriously!, and Michael Terry, the most hilarious hedge fund guy we’ve ever met. They swap stories about office jokes that fell flat, how to navigate a suddenly tense situation and what to do if your humor accidentally offends someone (especially your boss).  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Be Funny” with comedian Gary Gulman.  If you want to discover your own humor style, take the test on Naomi and Jennifer’s website.  Do you have a joke that killed at the office, or totally bombed? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Did you know that we, as a society, have fallen off a comedy cliff? No joke. Studies have shown that we largely stop laughing when we enter our mid-twenties, which is a shame because delighting in humor has a ton of health benefits. Plus, being perceived as funny can actually make people think you’re more intelligent, more competent, and even better looking! So on this episode of How To!, the first in a two-part series, we bring on Naomi Bagdonas, co-author of Humor, Seriously!, and Michael Terry, an amateur comedian who is working in the funniest of places: high finance. Combined, they have decades of experience harnessing the power humor and applying it to the workplace.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Confront a Crazy Neighbor” with Tig Notaro.  If you want to discover your own humor style, take the test on Naomi and Jennifer’s website.  Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Have you ever had to make an impossible decision? One that doesn’t have an obvious “right” answer. One that someone will inevitably hate. John knows this feeling all too well. He’s the superintendent for a mid-size school district in California. To say the last school year was difficult is a major understatement… John tried to ensure the safety of his students, teachers, and faculty while balancing the reality of students struggling in their virtual classes. Throughout the school year, John’s relationship with his teachers and the teachers union deteriorated. Now, classes are back in session and he’s hoping to find common ground as soon as possible. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Gary Friedman, a world-renowned conflict mediator. He has some tips on how all of us can mend a fraught relationship before it’s too late.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Stand Up to Your Terrible Manager—Without Getting Fired.” Do you have a problem you can’t get out of your head? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. This episode originally ran on August 31, 2021. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Every year, around the same time, Peter’s apartment comes alive. The shadows begin to scuttle and the pipes creak with creepy crawlies. At least that’s how it feels. Peter is freaked out by Israel’s large flying cockroaches. Logically, he knows they don’t pose a threat. But he can’t control his visceral disgust at encountering one and his panicked vigilance in the days that follow. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Dr. Elizabeth McMahon, a clinical psychologist who has been treating phobias like these for the last 30 years. She has some very practical advice for Peter, and anyone else with an irrational fear they’d like to overcome. Elizabeth often uses virtual reality therapy with her clients, most recently to treat needle phobias. She’s made this needle phobia training available for licensed therapists or supervised trainees. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Not Be Scared.” Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Every January nearly 75 percent of Americans resolve to make their lives better by losing weight. But this year we’re breaking free from the cycle of restrictive eating and spiraling shame. Journalist Virginia Sole-Smith, host and author of Burnt Toast and The Eating Instinct, has some eye-opening tips for our listener Tori that will help her ditch the scale, become more comfortable with her body, and even learn to control sugar cravings—by eating as many sweets as she wants.  If you liked this episode, check out “How To Lose 155 Pounds Happily” Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Comments (24)

Maggie Brown

Humans aren't the only organisms that have mental or behavioral disorders. It is so horribly sad.

Jan 13th
Reply (1)

Maggie Brown

sending this episode to everyone I know

Jan 13th
Reply

Cindy Pownall

Love this episode!

Dec 9th
Reply

ID18138661

How to is a great podcast. The newest episode shows me that using my intuition and perception of people is racist. It’s almost like we shouldn’t allow experience to dictate our approach to specific situations while also using our logic and reasoning to acertain the proper response. No we call common sense and preparedness “unconscious bias” instead of what it really is - a defense mechanism. And a good one too. If you have a prior experience with a specific person or group, you go in with an open heart and a contingency plan. That’s the point of the experience you’re “unconscious bias” is created by. Be sensible. Use BOTH experience and reasoning. The reasoning to know that this situation may not be like the others, and the experience to prepare if it is. Racism is inherently intentional. You cannot be accidentally racist. You have to intend for racism to happen before it does. Accidental racism isn’t racism. It’s someone being offended. By something not meant to offend. Try dealing with it the way I do - take responsibility for your words and actions and stop worrying about how they will be interpreted and start worrrying about how the will impact those around you for good.

Aug 24th
Reply

frya ghazinia

it's awesome and so useful thanks to Charles

Jul 19th
Reply

Khanoomzii

So since the man is fun to spend time with, woman is the one who should carry the burden of home chores, errands, children's stuff, household planning and so on, and to make things more interesting, she must seek help on how to keep a tension-free conversation about all that stuff with a man who does not even care to listen, or just to stay awake! I'm really mad how you guys handle that subject, regarding the pressure women are undertaking with the unfair burden of domestic responsibilities worldwide!

May 12th
Reply

Kyla McNamara

I took a break from listening for awhile, what happened to Charles?

Mar 2nd
Reply

Yaser Izadinia

hello, where can I find transcript of this episode?

Oct 3rd
Reply

Yaser Izadinia

hello, where can I find transcript of this episode?

Oct 3rd
Reply

Kristi Barnhart Kallgren

we may not be in a zombie apocalypse, but close enough.....wonder how this episode would be different if created now...

Sep 2nd
Reply

J B

I really like this podcast. Thank you for the great content!

Jun 25th
Reply

Thushanthi Ponweera

Just what I needed to hear today. Thank you!

May 29th
Reply

Chandra Sekhar

good

Apr 29th
Reply

Chandra Sekhar

PAIN IS PLEASURE

Apr 28th
Reply

Adam Guennoun

First comment for this video

Mar 5th
Reply

E J

Thanks. Very informative.

Feb 6th
Reply

Aj Hoffman

that's my dad he asked me to listen to this and I'm just so glad he is trying for me and grayson

Jan 22nd
Reply

Pogla

30 minute show with over 5 minutes of ads?

Nov 4th
Reply

Shari Miller

Loved this!!!! I so needed exactly this podcast! thank you

Oct 25th
Reply

Maharshi Bhavsar

can make one for how to sell things on Amazon??

Sep 20th
Reply
Download from Google Play
Download from App Store