Claim OwnershipChange Your Mind
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© Copyright Walter E. Jacobson, MD
Description
Walter E. Jacobson, M.D., a board-certified psychiatrist, discusses practical, common sense self-help techniques to Change Your Mind and end self-sabotaging behaviors getting in the way of your happiness, well-being and material success.
85 Episodes
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In these divisive times when we are filled with fear, confusion and rage, what is the answer? What is the solution? Ultimately it is quite simple: to treat others as we wish to be treated. To release our judgment and attack thoughts. To try to embrace as much as possible acceptance, tolerance, empathy, compassion and forgiveness. It's not easy but it's ultimately the only path to inner peace and world peace. It is the only way we will truly heal our nation and our world, our personal relationships, our business relationships, all relationships. We must remember that we are all connected, that we are all part of the oneness of the universe, whether you believe in God or not, whether you believe in religion or not, it doesn't matter, the golden rule is a universal principle of right action and ultimate salvation. Don't just think it, apply it, be it! And watch your inner world and your outer world get better!
When a patient asked me how to deal with panic attacks that were caused by a feud between her husband and her daughter that was pulling her part, she asked me if I could help. Essentially, my advice was to disengage from the process, to set a boundary with both of them that this is their problem and they need to resolve it without drawing you into it and forcing you to take sides or be a go-between. Listen for my entire response.
Use this time during the pandemic to self-reflect, to challenge the choices you have made up to now, to consider other options, to be grateful for what you have, to appreciate those around you, to express your love to those you claim to care about most, and to stop your default ways of responding to others with irritability, sarcasm, judgment, etc. Use your time well to reform your Self and to make a commitment to express forgiveness, acceptance, gratitude, tolerance, mindfulness and compassion to all those who cross your path, without conditions and without exceptions.
There is another contagion spreading exponentially throughout the fabric of our society, throughout our collective consciousness. A contagion of hypocrisy and lies. A loss of objectivity. And it's not just "them." It's US! ALL OF US! We're all liars. We're all part of the problem. We need to #StopTheLying.
I will be well. I will myself to be well. Nothing can attack me or harm me except my own thoughts, except my fear. Regardless of circumstances, I remember who I AM: I am NOT a body. I am Free. I am guiltless. I am sinless. I am eternal. I am invulnerable. I am as God created me. Only the mind can be sick. Only the mind is in need of healing.
To be "woke" is to engage in acceptance, tolerance, forgiveness, compassion and honest communication with everyone, without conditions and without exceptions. We treat everyone as we wish to be treated. We do not engage in judging, blaming, shaming, guilting, attacking or demonizing, regardless of how they are behaving. Becoming woke is a spiritual awakening. It is mindfulness. It is personal growth. It is a commitment to unconditional love.
We are not going to stop mass shootings if we blame the wrong things. We have to identify and address the root cause which largely has nothing to do with what is happening in our society now. It has to do with what happened to these mass shooters when they were children starting to go off the rails. #daytonohioshooting, #elpasoshooting #news
Let me just say that this is an invaluable exercise if you choose to engage in it. This will improve your relationships, your self-esteem, your ability to maximize the Law of Attraction, your health and your happiness. AND it will help move humanity up the evolutionary ladder.
The reason why there are so many people who are unhappy, angry, anxious, depressed, frustrated, and unfulfilled is because they have failed to apply THREE KEY PRINCIPLES in all aspects of their lives. Truth. Compassion. Calm.
The answer should be "No." We forgive others for our own peace of mind, regardless of whether people are sorry or not, apologize or not, etc. We forgive others to release our anger, our resentments, our judgments, our sense of victimhood. Our forgiveness is unconditional. It does not depend on the offender doing anything. We forgive because it is in OUR best interests to do so.
I saw a photo of a woman hunter with a big smile on her face standing in front of a giraffe she had just murdered. It made me literally cry to see the pride and joy on her face. It is a sickness of the soul that one would get pleasure out of snuffing out the life of another animal who is innocent and unable to protect itself from such heartless savagery. The giraffe is now on the endangered species list because of soulless idiots like that woman. We need to defend those who are weaker than us, rather than dominate and destroy them.
Do you wait till you're about to go to sleep to start worrying and scaring yourself over the difficult, anxiety-provoking issues in your life? If so, STOP IT! I don't mean you should stop worrying, that's okay, worrying can be helpful, but not before bedtime. Put aside a time earlier in the evening to worry about stuff and then when it's time to go to bed you won't have to keep yourself up worrying because you already did it! It works. Takes practice. It can be done. Personal growth is a matter of developing good habits. And so is mental health.
Social Anxiety Disorder is a condition of extreme anxiety related to meeting new people and being around people, the fear being that you will say or do something that will appear incredibly foolish and embarrassing. Rather than get proper treatment, you tend to avoid people and co-exist with your discomfort and happiness. But it doesn't have to be that way. There are techniques for decreasing the anxiety, de-sensitizing yourself, and increasing your self-esteem and confidence.
There are times when we need to take action, to be aggressive, to make our case, to stake our claim. And then there are times when it is best to not take action, to hold our tongue, to wait and see, to not expose our hand, to not act impulsively. There is great wisdom in knowing when to do which.
To hate anything Is a mistake. Hate reduces clarity, increases impulsivity, and blocks the flow of wisdom from your Higher Self
Set boundaries. Validate, then counterpoint. Choose your battles. Everything is love or a call for love. Do you want to be right or happy? Anger hurts, forgiveness heals. Treat others as you wish to be treated.
Many of us stay in relationships way too long, way past the point where there is any real hope that things will change for the better and provide us with the satisfying, sustainable relationship that we desire. It is often the fear of loneliness that keeps us in the relationship. Perhaps the dread of having to start the process over again of searching for and finding a loving partner. As the red flags in the relationship pile up, we sweep them under the rug. Perhaps we have outbursts of anger on a regular basis. Perhaps we have resentments simmering below the surface. Either way, we're not happy. And perhaps we could be if we chose to cut our losses and move on. Not an easy decision to make but perhaps a worthwhile one in the long run.
We can get depressed because it runs in our family. We can get depressed because our family was dysfunctional and we developed insecurity and low self-esteem. We can get depressed because of our job, our health, our relationships. Medications may help. Talk Therapy may help. Taking action may help. Despite the tremendous fatigue, lack of interest, lack of motivation and drive, and feelings of hopelessness and helplessness that can come with depression, if we take action, if we force ourselves to do one thing each day to move our lives to a better place, it can have a significant impact on our depression and speed up our recovery.
Our thoughts create our reality. Our fears generate our failures. Our love can move mountains.Best we choose our thoughts wisely.
Many of us don't set and maintain boundaries with abusive people in our lives because we fear that rather than cooperate with what we are asking of them, they will choose to end the relationship, which then brings up issues of abandonment within us which generates anxiety and perhaps depression as well which we fear we will not be able to deal with. Consequently, the abuse continues, our emotional needs continue to be unmet, and we experience ongoing anger, resentment, and dissatisfaction.
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