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Practically Speaking Mom: Intentional Mom, Strong Family
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Practically Speaking Mom: Intentional Mom, Strong Family

Author: Val Harrison, The Practically Speaking MOM

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Do you long to be a more intentional mom but you feel overwhelmed or weary or just don't have a clear path to the next step toward a successful family life? The Practically Speaking MOM, Val Harrison, is here to bring some order to the chaos and some focus to the confusion. You don’t have to be the perfect mom to have a strong family, you need a plan! Join author, speaker, mother of seven, and grandma of two, as she shares wisdom and encouragement about the six areas of an intentional mom's life. You'll learn from her years of experience, successes, mistakes and redemption. Val and her husband Rich, married 28 years, have three married children, two more in college, and two in her homeschool. This podcast covers all stages of parenting, from babies to toddlers to teens and beyond. Val wants to encourage you to not become weary in your work as an intentional mom, "Even with all its unique personalities, imperfections and scars; your family is God's masterpiece. Your efforts matter in this worthy journey of motherhood." Galations 6:9 says, "Do not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time you'll reap a harvest if you do not give up." Let's walk this marathon journey of motherhood TOGETHER, right here, every Monday on the Practically Speaking MOM podcast, the place for an intentional mom to build a strong family.
64 Episodes
Part of our role as intentional moms is to identify God’s unique design in our children, to help them to see it clearly for themselves, and, to  help them to allow the Holy Spirit to HONE their gifts & strengths and work on their weaknesses that may be overshadowing those strengths,   HOW DO WE DO THIS? Let's talk about it on Episode 63.This process is the tremendous privilege we are given in motherhood of partnering with our kids and with God to develop their lives into their purpose.   Here's a link to the blog post for Episode 63."...snails are a lot like many kids (and even many of us adults) that only see the ordinary part of ourselves – maybe even see our ordinariness as unattractive and unwanted when all the while, we have wonderful, uniquely-designed-by-God qualities that we don’t see...."     Episode 63, Unlock Your Child's Strengths & Impact their Self-Perception,  focuses on two of our child's heart-questions,  “Am I worth Knowing?” and “Am I worth Believing In?” It gives insight into how to DISCOVER your child's strengths that may be hiding behind "weaknesses" and also gives practical ways to impact your child's self-perception.In this second week with my material, "Your Love Becomes Their Strength, Answering the Six Questions of Your Child's Heart," we join again with the Chosen Mamas Podcast, where I was asked to be a guest for an event followed by a Q&A session.💚RESOURCES Click here to listen to Last week's episode: 62 Mending Your Child's Heart at every age.". 💚Chosen Mamas Podcast is associated with CHOSEN, located in Derby, KS, a group for moms of all ages who want to intersect their faith in Jesus with the every day ups and downs of motherhood. 💚Another podcast episode that goes into more details about dealing with negative self-talk in our tweens & teens.💚Link to my  podcast series on Root Parenting💚Here's a link to a LIVE workshop audio download where I share about all six questions of your child's  heart. 💚 Wearing All Your Hats without Wearing Out: Finding Focus for Your Family to be the Masterpiece God Intended💚Cross-Wired Science  Discount Code  CWS80Off at checkoutCONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
Even intentional, loving parents are going to cause some heart-wounds in our children. How can we identify those wounds? How can we help them heal? That's our topic today on the Practically Speaking MOM Podcast, the place for an intentional mom to build a strong family.  Every child's heart is asking, "Do you love me enough to RESTORE our relationship, to REPAIR my heart?"  Today we're talking about the wounds we may cause in our children’s hearts (even unintentionally and sometimes completely unknowingly). We'll look at how to RESTORE with our children (even grown children), how to MAINTAIN OUR INFLUENCE in their lives, and how to remain vigilant in SEEKING OUR CHILD'S HEART-WHOLENESS.Today's conversation centers around one of the six main questions of every child’s heart, "Am I Worth Restoring?" These six questions are from my material, "Your Love Becomes Their Strength: Answering the Six Questions of Your Child's Heart."CLICK HERE to go to Val's BLOG POST for episode 62. (Link is LIVE BY NOON every Monday).Next week, in episode 63, we'll continue the conversation with Chosen Mamas, looking at two more questions of our child's heart - "Am I worth Knowing?" and "Am I worth Believing In?"💚RESOURCES:❤Chosen Mamas Podcast is associated with CHOSEN, located in Derby, KS, a group for moms of all ages who want to intersect their faith in Jesus with the every day ups and downs of motherhood. They are a welcoming, loving group of dedicated moms. If you’re located near Derby, KS and would like to join them, they’re at South Rock Christian Church or email me at and I’ll connect you with Liz or Amanda. They are two of the moms you’ll hear on this podcast over the next two weeks.   💚Here's a link to a LIVE workshop audio download where I share about all six questions of your heart.  CONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
Practical Parenting Hint - EXPECTATIONS and STANDARDS are not the same thing.  Use expectations as a tool to move your child toward the fixed standard. Let's talk about it in episode 61, Giving Our Kids SMALL Steps to BIG Results."Small steps takes you a long way over time. In fact, there are  some things we accomplish in life that we would never be able to achieve except through little steps."  " Every Child needs opportunities to 1. LEAD 2. FOLLOW. 3.  Be a TEAM PLAYER.  We don't have to choose leader OR follower for our children.  We don't have to choose leader OR follower for our child.  We want them to be great at both!  So, we should expect them to cooperate with good SOCIAL HABITS and humble obedience habits in addition to teaching them leadership skills, creativity, proactive problem-solving, and more."Click here for my blog post and detailed shownotes for episode 61, Giving Our Kids SMALL Steps to BIG Results & Littles Who Don't Listen.Mom, what is a struggle area  of frustration that you're having with your child?  Maybe  you feel like you've told them a million times but it's still a problem?   Perhaps you need to break it down into small steps. We'll use an example of a three year old who isn't listening or obeying, but the principles can be applied with any age and most issues.RESOURCES mentioned in episode 61:✅Val's favorite Language Arts Curriculum: Shurley English Method  I'm not an affiliate of this curriculum, I just love it!  I've tried many and this has been the most thorough for teaching grammar to my children.✅Episode 5 Getting Kids to Listen the First Time✅Episode 7 Work Ethic and the Habit of Happiness in Littles, Middles, and TeensThis episode also includes a Marriage Minute  with Rich &  Val - Asking your spouse, "What makes you feel valued by me?"CONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
A NEW look, a new sound, and a new format is waiting for you in episode 60 of the Practically Speaking MOM: Intentional Mom, Strong Family Podcast.  This is a SPECIAL SEASON TWO DEBUT episode!  "Family Table Talk Ideas & Season 2 DEBUT - Let God Write Your Victory Song" episode 60.Click here for the blog post, "Let God Write Your Victory Song"Link to Operation World  (Abby & Val talk about Operation World and their new app - a great GEOGRAPHY & PRAYER resource while we mention our top seven countries where we have listeners to the show:  US, Canada, Australia, South Africa,  Ireland, Hungary,  United Kingdom).  We are so grateful for our international listeners and we want you to know WE PRAY FOR YOU and YOUR FAMILIES).Be sure to listen until the end of this episode as Val introduces a new segment called "In the Family Room with Val."  On this week's Family Room segment she shares several ideas for Family Dinner Time Talk.  These ideas were from other intentional moms who shared their ideas  during a Q&A at one of Val's recent Intentional Moms events.CONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
BLOOPERS  Year One! "Behind the Mic" hosted by Abby & Emma, episode 59.This is Val Harrison, the Practically Speaking MOM and I approved this episode. What was I thinking?Link to blog post for Episode 59. It has a few behind the scenes pics related to this episode. You’re listening to the final episode of Year One of the Practically Speaking MOM: Intentional Mom, Strong Family Podcast!  Rich and I handed over a year’s worth of bloopers to our youngest two daughters and set them loose to bring you, Behind the Mic with Abby & Emma.  They  created all of the scripts and give a stellar performance.  If you're looking for some laughs, this episode will NOT disappoint."Gabby Abby" and "Emma Dilemma" bring you four categories of bloopers:*Mom Says It Nice*Surround Sound*Tongue Tied*Serious HilariousJoin us next week for our Debut of Year Two, Season Two!This is Val Harrison, the Practically Speaking MOM and I approved this episode. What was I thinking?Electronic sound effects obtained from CONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
Episode 58, BEST OF YEAR ONE - top episodes, top parenting principles, hosted by Rich and ValIt's time to CELEBRATE!  This is the first of three episodes of celebration for our One Year Milestone with the Practically Speaking MOM Podcast, the podcast for an intentional mom to build a strong family.  Coming Soon:10/26/2020 BLOOPERS - Behind the Mic with Abby & Emma - this one is hilarious!11/02/2020 DEBUT of SEASON TWO!!! - Can't wait to share some NEW aspects of the show with all of you! Click Here to read the Blog Post for this episode which contains the dialog and links to episodes that were showcased in this episode. (Sorry, usually the blog  is usually published before noon on Mondays.  It can't be published until the podcast goes live, thus I have to publish the blog post on Monday mornings.  However, this Monday morning I am speaking to a group of moms and I'll hit publish as soon as I'm finished meeting with them. I'm sharing with them the material from Your Love Becomes Their Strength: Answering the Six Essential Questions of Your Child's Heart.  Pray for them right now that they would receive the help they need to strengthen their relationships with their children. Thanks for your patience.  I sure appreciate all of you dear followers of the show.  It is such a joy to minister to you each week.  Hugs, Val)CONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
Here is an episode full of wisdom nuggets for moms to keep the right PERSPECTIVE with your to do list, to keep your PRIORITIES in order, to find STRENGTH in difficult times, AND it wraps up with guest Steph Fisher leading us through a Stress-Relieving Deep Breathing Exercise.  This is a conversation rich in wisdom, encouragement, and motivation for mamas between Val Harrison, The Practically Speaking MOM and her cousin and wellness expert, Steph Fisher.  All of this in episode 57, Motivation for Mamas to Reduce Stress, Keep Priority Focus, & Take Time to Breath with Guest Steph Fisher.This episode ends with Steph Fisher walking us through a Stress-Reducing Deep Breathing Exercise designed to increase focus and decrease stress.For this week's podcast notes, click here to go to my blog post for episode 57.  About our Guest, Steph Fisher @StephFisherWelness www.StephanieFisher.arbonne.comSteph Fisher has been Fitness Director and Head Personal Trainer with several fitness certifications.  She's taught Cycle, Kickbox HIIT, and Pilates for 20+ years, and recently added her 200hr RYT Yoga certification to her list of health leadership experience.  She is also an ERVP with Arbonne.  She's passionate about helping others discover their personal balance and strength.  She's a mama to four great kids and wife to Joey. And she's also Val's cousin!  But who she is most of all, is daughter of the King of Kings who brings her joy and sustaining grace every day!Podcast episodes mentioned in this episode:Episode 38: Mom Making Money: Strategies that Work So Your Focus Can Be on Your FamilyEpisode 14: Raising a Luke 2:52 KidEpisode 22: Mom's Marathon PathHere's more about the concept of Feasting with the Father Episode 24 Here's an episode where I talk more about my grandma and her time in the valley with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
 This week we look at lots of awesome strategies for FITTING HEALTH into our busy momlife!!  Oh, Mama, you want to listen to this two-week discussion between Val Harrison, the Practically Speaking MOM, and Steph Fisher of @StephFisherWellness.  "When you take care of YOU well, then you're able to take care of your family well." Steph Fisher of @StephFisherWellnessMoms have a tendency to shove their own needs to the bottom of the pile. We're constantly inundated with obligations, little people tugging on our pant leg, older kids needing our help,  and for many of us, we also have to add "making some income" to the list of responsibilities that volley for our time, our attention, and our energy. For many years, my life was a series of days of neglecting me, especially my physical needs.  Most afternoons I would find myself completely depleted and then realize that I had done nothing to take care of myself physically. In my warped perspective, I thought that was selflessly, lovingly caring for my family.  I knew my children needed a mom who was nourished spiritually if I wanted to help bring them to relationship with our Creator, but I didn't realize that same principle applied to physical health. Intentional Mom, I've told you before, IT IS NOT SELFISH TO TAKE CARE OF YOU.  The opposite is actually true: Taking care of YOU is one of the most important gifts you give your family. But how do we make it happen?!  How do we make time for self-care? How can we develop a healthy lifestyle when we have NO TIME and NO ENERGY and NO MONEY?! And then how do we help our family be more healthy in a sugar-filled world?!Steph Fisher to the rescue!  She has been one of my top mom-health mentors over the last four years in my journey back to health, (I still have a long way to go, which is why I still need Steph!), and I'm so glad that you'll all get to meet her this week (and next) on the podcast!  Steph is a fitness powerhouse with several certification and 20+ years experience in helping mamas become healthy physically. I'm also blessed to call Steph my cousin!Next week, in Part two *Staying encouraged even through tough times  *Juggling income when your priorities are God First, Family Second, and then everything else *Stress Relief including a Guided Breathing Exercise at the end of Part two that will leave you feeling mellow and energized.  I put it at the end of the episode so it would be easy for you to return to it anytime you want a Stress Relief Guided Breathing Exercise with Steph! Fisher has been Fitness Director and Head Personal Trainer, with several fitness certifications.  She's taught Cycle, Kickbox HIIT, and Pilates for 20+ years, and recently added her 200hr RYT Yoga certification to her list of health leadership experience.  She is also an ERVP with Arbonne.  She's passionate about helping others discover their personal balance and strength.  She's a mama to four great kids and wife to Joey. And she's also Val's cousin!  But who she is most of all, is daughter of the King of Kings who brings her joy and sustaining grace every day!CONNECT with VALWebsite        Facebook Group        Facebook Page      Instagram
A Sense of SECURITY is a Fundamental Building Block in the Pursuit of Wholeness - the wholeness of an individual and of a relationship.What if you had someone in your life who was fully committed to your wholeness as a person, someone who sacrificially pursued your sense of security every single day? How would that impact your ability to thrive? To stay encouraged? To pursue God's big and small purposes for your life? Today, we're looking at the important building block that is GIVING THE GIFT OF SECURITY to those you love. Our examples are regarding marriage, but you can take these principles and apply them to parenthood TO HELP YOUR CHILD THRIVE because of a sense of security. In this episode I'm joined by your favorite host, and my all-time favorite person, my husband Rich.  Episode 54 is one more building block in helping those you love THRIVE and grow closer to  WHOLENESS as an individual and WHOLENESS in your relationship.Relational Security- Security within your RELATIONSHIP TRANSPARENCY- My spouse has the confidence that I am being open, fully honest, disclosing everything. It is vulnerable accountability and a commitment to complete truth.  "Usually the things that I don't want to bring up... are the exact things that I need to bring up."  "If you are fully, vulnerably honest with me... that gives me a real sense of security that I can really trust you."Maintaining agreed upon BOUNDARIES to honor the relationship Avoiding the self-protection trap - a barrier to onenessDEFENDING the one you love- "My level of defense for you reflects my value of you."GENTLENESS- treat their emotions and vulnerability with tenderness; not using what they say against them, not manipulating. Respecting, treasuring,  "I'm a gentle cheerleader of the fact that you are willing to be transparent."Provisional Security- Security in material aspects of lifeINCOME STABILITY- Healthy work/home balance, maintaining stability in job, partnering in position changes or potential job changes. FINANCES- Common financial goals and strategies (spending limits, budgeting, use of debt, etc.)MAINTAINING OUR RESOURCES- Honoring each other by each fully participating in keeping our things in good repair and manageable.Family Security- Security regarding how we manage our familyPARENTING- each parent equally engaged in raising children, identifying concerns, developing character, imparting spiritual truths and developmentSYSTEMS- Driving kids places, scheduling, laundry, meals, the kids' chores, maintaining the home... There are many aspects that play a role in how smoothly life happens as a family.  It can be very demoralizing if only one parent is implementing the systems that help a family function with stability while the other parent is ignoring the systems or not contributing to the complex creating and maintaining of systems.LEGACY- "We're partnered together in our legacy, thinking long-term in impacting their view of God, themselves, relationships, family, work, citizenship, etc.Resources: Episode 8 Redeeming Your Marriage and Developing ONENESS - choosing God's BEST in our marriageEpisode 23 Negative Communication Habits & Communication Games that have Got to GoIf you would like to contribute to the cost of producing the podcast, here is one way: CashApp:  $valpsm. 
Sibling Squabbles & Family Standards for Fighting Fair, Birthday Bonding, Listener Q&A, Changing Negative Self-Perceptions, and the Hard Work of Mending Relationships are all a part of Episode 53 of the Practically Speaking MOM: Intentional Mom, Strong Family Podcast.How would you like to sit-in on a lighthearted chat with Val and her two youngest children? That's what you'll do in the first half of episode 53.  Then Val continues with Listener Q&A. Announcement: Sign up for Val's Monday Email (containing podcast & show notes) by the end of September as all subscribers will receive a FREE Family Communication Evaluation Form emailed to you. Sign up at www.PracticallySpeakingMOM.comClick Here for Link to corresponding blog post which contains adding info:  STEPS to MENDING RELATIONSHIP with YOUR GROWN CHILD.In Episode 53, learn...*How we handle Sibling Conflict and Standards in Fighting Fair*A Birthday Tradition that promotes sibling bonding while also improving self-perception and even improves communication skills and character*Listener Q&AEpisode 53 Listener Q&A includes...*What to do when our kids don't want to hear us say positive things about them. Often the root problem is Negative Self-Perception.  What can we as parents do to help?*How should we handle it when we are personally inconsistent in enforcing boundaries, or enforcing chores and other behavior in our kids?*Mending Relationship with our kids, especially older kids.... where do we begin?  (See corresponding blog post for additional REPAIR STEPS that aren't discussed in the episode.)Believe it or not, arguments DO happen at the Harrison household and thus we've developed some family standards for fighting fair - how we treat one another when we disagree. Abby and Emma help me tell listeners what sibling squabbles sound like in our home and we hope that this will give you some ideas and new perspectives for developing some sibling spatting standards at your home too!"By treasuring the relationship enough to REPAIR after a disagreement, we are showing how much we value that relationship.""Whether it is positive habits or negative habits, whatever habits of communication our oldest children are displaying, those behaviors will trickle down to the younger children as well."  Resources: Val's most popular podcast episode: Episode 6 "Parenting Middles & Teens, Overcoming Negative Self-Talk, & What Teens aren't Telling You." *Clash in Your Home: Getting A Game Plan for Cleaning Up the Conflict   or E-BookIf you would like to contribute to the cost of producing the podcast, here is one way: CashApp:  $valpsm.   hope you'll message me at val@practicallyspeakingmom so I can thank you or in the description spot in the cashapp transaction list your name or contact info, if you're willing, so I can thank you for supporting this message!
"In all honesty I was tired of running from God. It’s hard work to run away from God because you’re running away from love and joy and hope. You don’t realize, until you’re away from all of those, the deep cavern that is inside of you without God filling it. So I came to this place of surrender and it was really GRACE. I was finally willing to admit that I was lonely and that I was hopeless… to admit that I couldn’t do this anymore on my own and I didn’t want to..."    Victoria Dahilig, Episode 51This week and next, you get to journey to the heart of God through the testimony of Victoria Dahilig - church youth and ministry director.  This two part series includes two original songs by Victoria - words God gave her because they were the words her heart needed to hear, and perhaps you need these words for your own heart or for the heart of one that you love who is running."Psalm 113:7-8 says 'He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap to make them sit with princes and the princes of His people.' That was exactly where I felt that I was at – that I was poor in the dust and needy in the ash heap. I had felt that I was in a place of dust and ashes and God was willing to lift me out of the heap... I grabbed a hold of the truth about the sovereignty of God - the mystery of Him and the assurance of Him... One of my songs was born out of this realization, in the act of turning back to Christ and realizing how heavy the loneliness, and dust, and ashes were weighing on me and taking the chance to open up in an honest prayer to God – lifting a raw prayer before Him.“     Victoria Dahilig, Episode 51Parents, one thing I feel very strongly is that how we help our younger children discover God is a very different parenting plan from when our teens and adult children wrestle with their faith. "Who is God?" and "Who am I in relationship to Him?"  Are critical questions. As intentional parents, we can't have a "one size fits all ages" approach to this heart issue. We need to handle it differently at different stages of life. Next week, as we conclude this interview with Tori and introduce her next song, we’ll also talk about the Parent’s Action Plan - steps for helping your kids make their faith their own - different steps for different stages of childhood.“God doesn’t eliminate the difficulties and trials for our children, but He does walk with them through these times. He is right there with them at every moment of every step, going in front, going beside, going behind, carrying them. He is totally surrounding our kids and we can trust Him."val harrison, The Practically Speaking MOM, episode 51"Welcome Me" written and performed by Victoria Dahilig, Copyright 2009Next week, I will share ACTION STEPS for PARENTS  at each age and stage, to aid in the process of kids taking on their faith in God AS THEIR OWN, from the young to the grown, what we can do as intentional parents. (Episode 52, publishes 9/7/2020). The story continues with the second song for the second step in Tori’s journey to the heart of God. I am honored that you spend time with me each week, listening to the podcast while you multi-task your busy life.  Here's some other things you can do: Leave a review on Apple ITunes and on my public Facebook page, Connect with my Intentional Mom, Strong Family private community on Facebook.See my books, my blog, my resource recommendations, and subscribe at:  Practically Speaking  See you next week, I’m praying for you.  val.
Fifty episodes is something to CELEBRATE when you're a mom of seven, grandma to two, a homeschooler, and a Mompreneur!  Val (and Rich too) are amazed that God continues to direct this ministry - now with registered listeners in over 40 countries around the world and thousands of downloads. Moms in all types of circumstances are becoming more intentional, growing stronger families, and celebrating the fact that God has designed their imperfect family as God's perfect masterpiece in the making!  Celebrate this milestone with Val and Rich as you learn more of their heart for each one of you in this 50th episode special.I may be the Practically Speaking MOM, but I'm not a perfect mom. All of my episode themes are based on my biggest failures and mistakes. I’ve just failed a lot. But I am willing to learn from my mistakes, seek forgive, and do the hard work of letting God mold me. It’s not that I’m a great mom, it’s that I’m a mistaking mom who is determined to not stay the way I am.""In a marriage, God can take a great big mess and turn it into something amazing, if we let Him...  if we lay down our weapons against one another.""The ingredients for Healthy Family Relationships, or really any healthy relationship are HONESTY, HUMILITY, and HONOR. Those are the three ingredients we most strive for in our family.  We're not going to get it right all the time, or even most of the time, but we keep striving toward this standard, keep developing these habits of HONESTY, HUMILITY, and HONOR."Here's the QUESTIONS Rich asked Val on this BEHIND THE SCENES episode of the Practically Speaking MOM: Intentional Mom, Strong Family Podcast!❓So, what’s the deal with the long title for your podcast? "Practically Speaking MOM: Intentional Mom, Strong Family Podcast." That's a lot.❔What happened to the Six Rooms of the Intentional Mom's Home, is that still a key part of the ministry? ❓What do you want the listeners to know about Val Harrison?❔What's been the most challenging thing that's happened since beginning the podcast?❓Why do you keep doing this ministry on hard days?❔What's been the most rewarding part of being the Practically Speaking MOM?❓What's the listeners' favorite episodes and what's yours?❔Where are we going from here? What can the listeners expect?Top Two Listened to Episodes:🎧Episode 6 Parenting Middles & Teens - Overcoming Negative Self-Talk - What Your Teens Aren't Telling You- Resources for those who love a child in the Gen Z world.🎧Episode Trailer: Meet the Practically Speaking MOMCONNECT with Val:Subscribe to my Monday Email containing blog post and podcast:   Val's Facebook Private Community Intentional Mom, Strong Family   Val's Instagram: Val for a Coaching Session or for your next Mom's Event at
LAUNCH Time: Legacy Building for what comes next  & a Mother's Prayer at the Threshold, Episode 49.If you'd like the words of the Mother's Milestone Prayer from this episode, you will find them on my blog that publishes Mondays by noon, at  While there, be sure to take a few seconds to enter your email address to register to receive my weekly blog post and podcast right in your inbox.Some questions that will be answer on this week's episode:❓What's my family's identity - characteristics that represent our family?❓What LEGACY am I building - the values I want to pass on?❓What qualities do my kids need most to prepare them to launch into adulthood? ❓How can they develop confidence & humility at the same time? ❓When my child no longer lives with me, what is my role in their life and is it as important of a role as I had before?❓How do I pray for my child? ❓How do I pray for my mourning mama heart?Mom, don't wait to prepare your kids for adulthood! If you want them to have SOLID HABITS as adults, you want to help them develop those NOW.  In the first part of today's podcast, my youngest son, Andrew, and I discuss four key areas in a strong foundation, from Andrew's perspective - work ethic, finances, social life, and spiritual life. This first section would be great for your middle school or high school son to listen with you. Then I continue the podcast looking at building LEGACY & building FAMILY IDENTITY.  This all wraps up with a heartfelt prayer from a mama who is going through the mourning process of launching her child into adulthood.Every mom has a vital role to play in the next step of your child's life - whether your kiddos are little are fully launched.  No matter what stage of motherhood you are in, from new mom to grandma, this week's podcast will touch every heart and give you fresh perspective in your next step on this worthy journey of motherhood.  Resources:Chip Ingram - Living on the EdgeAlistair Begg - Truth For LifeVal's Book: Wearing All Your Hats without Wearing Out: Finding Focus to be the Masterpiece God Intended Podcast Episode 3: Ways to Love Your Child from Toddler to Teen, and Learning to Let Them Grow UpCONNECT with Val:Subscribe to my Monday Email containing blog post and podcast:   Val's Facebook Private Community Intentional Mom, Strong Family   Val's Instagram: Val for your next Mom's event in person or via zoom at
Growing Heroes & Helping Weaknesses - the positive habit of audio adventures w/ guest Jim Hodges, Episode 48.Read Val's Blog Post regarding this episode HERE (get Val's weekly podcast & blog emailed to you every Monday by going here and entering your email address)If you’ve known me for awhile, then you know that I’ve been living the mom life for almost 27 years. From those nearly three decades of raising seven children, I would rank what we’re talking about today in my top ten habits that shaped my children’s character, shaped their worldview, their wisdom – the application of knowledge, and  shaped their life pursuits – their perspective on venturing into the unknown, setting goals, being obstacle over-comers. Today, we’re talking about making quality, wholesome, character-building AUDIO ADVENTURES a routine part of your child’s life.  Our family has had many family adventures thanks to our podcast guest this week!  He is a professional voice performer and one of my family's favorite story tellers, Jim Hodges of Jim Hodges Audio Books.  Jim & I have a lively discussion about lots of things, including how weaknesses in our kids can lead to great adventures, a game-changing tip for slow readers, and the impact of quality content on the shaping of our child's character!About  this week's guest, Jim Hodges:  Jim Hodges is a committed Christian, husband to Monica for 40 years, father of 3 grown home-schooled children, and Navy retiree. Monica once asked what his dream job would be? He answered "I'd record books." And so began Jim Hodges Audio Books, producing (at last count!) 30 unabridged recordings of the G. A. Henty historical novels, plus 50 other family friendly recordings. Check out Jim Hodge's SPECIALS including a  FREE Download & a monthly subscription service that saves 66%! Get a FREE Download from Jim:'s SPECIAL for August 2020 Jim's Monthly Club for getting 60% off your choice of a monthly download: with Val:Subscribe to my Monday Email containing my blog post and podcast:   Val's Facebook Private Community Intentional Mom, Strong Family   Val's Instagram: Val for your next Mom's event in person or via zoom:
Intentional parents, it is never too late to pivot, apologize, and course correct.  The sooner you do, the sooner you'll get to enjoy the wonderful, undeserved harvest even for the mistaking parent.  When we parents learn the hard way, we aren't the only ones who suffer. Our children bare the brunt of our errors and for those of us who love our kids deeply, which is most of us, the guilt can be overwhelming!  We serve a redeeming God and He's good at giving us second chances to love well.I've come to find that God our Heavenly Father is the perfect example of boundless love that is full of both mercy and high standards all rolled into one. I call it Mercy Seat Parenting and you can read about it in my book  Wearing All Your Hats without Wearing Out: Finding Focus to be the Masterpiece Family God Intended.   or E-Book 💕If you want your kids to come to you when they're wrestling with life's sticky issues, 💕if you want them to hear your warnings and reproofs,💕 if you want to be a main voice in their decisions as they get older,  you have to have proven to them that you are a safe haven for their hearts and thoughts.We earn the right to maintain influence in our older children's lives.  Your reaction determines their future openness with you. Read more on my blog (publishes noon every Monday).Click here to go to Val's BLOG for Episode #47ResourcesVal's book, Clash in Your Home: Getting a Game Plan for Cleaning Up the Conflict         E-BookVal's Live WORKSHOP Download only $4 for a limited time. Clash In Your Home LIVE WorkshopYour Family, God's Masterpiece THREE BOOK SPECIAL on $32:    Click Here    (Includes Clash In Your Home, Wearing All Your Hats without Wearing Out, and When Littles are Loud)Click here to listen to Part 1: The Hope-Filled Life of the Mistaking ParentCONNECT with Val:Subscribe to my Monday Email containing blog post and podcast:   Val's Facebook Private Community Intentional Mom, Strong Family   Val's Instagram: Val for your next Mom's event in person or via
Pt 3 of Managing STRESS in Mom & Child: Counteracting the Harmful Impacts of Stress w/ guest Amanda Colliatie, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist(Be sure to checkout the coordinating blog post on Val's website)In this episode Amanda shares all of these Buffers to Stress:*How to have Good Sleep Habits *STATUE PARENTING for teens and tweens*The role of Exercise and a Healthy Diet in diminishing the affects of stress including reducing inflammation* PLANNING AHEAD - when we have a plan we feel like we have structure and this also REDUCES TIME URGENCY.  Find things you can do slowly ON PURPOSE.*Deep Breathing, Prayer, Meditation*Maximizing your best times of day to have an UP time and a DOWN time or rest time.  Both are important.*Quiet Family Time or Alone Quiet Time to de-stress*Journaling (see the coordinating blog post to see a list of questions to use for de-stressing journaling)*Mental Health - finding a buffering person, or a small group such as a church small group, where you feel safe sharing, or it could be that you need to reach out to a licensed therapist, such as Amanda. All of these layers of  human connection can help your mental health:One on one buffer personSmall Group (such as a church small group)Large Group worshipTherapistAnd then sometimes, you may need to "ditch a group" if that group isn't helping your life or your relationships."It's important to remember that regardless of the stress that is going on, you are unbelievably powerful for buffering your family's stress. Studies show that you really only need to get it right about 35% of the time.  You don't have to be perfect to have kids that are doing okay. So be encouraged!" Amanda Colliatie, LMFTVal talks about how to get kids' on board with monitoring their stress levels and reminds us that kids' minds need time to create, problem solve, hear God's voice, reflect - Don't keep noise such as the t.v. or radio- as a CONSTANT wallpaper in their life.  They need time for quiet, too!This episode ends with Val and Amanda praying for all the wonderful intentional mamas that listen to this ministry.Amanda Colliatie is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Wichita, Kansas. Her practice at Encounter Freedom Therapy Center website or Facebook page is dedicated to providing skilled therapy that is safe, affordable, and practical.ResourcesSources for some of Amanda's concepts:  A Mind Frozen in Time: A PTSD Recovery Guide by Dr. Jeremy P. Crosby, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris’ book The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity,   SAMHSA Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration's National Child Traumatic Stress Initiative (NCSTI),  Brandon Peters, MD,  Episode 13 Mom's mental Health w/ Amanda Colliatie.CONNECT with Val:   Val's Facebook Private Community Intentional Mom, Strong FamilyBe sure to connect with Val on Instagram to get more of the Behind the Scenes & Life w/ Val and Her Family!  Look for Practically Speaking MOM on Instagram!
BUFFERING Techniques for Stress in Our & Our Kids' Lives - from Guest Amanda Colliatie, LMFT  Click here to read Blog. 1. Build Up - Be a force against the negativity in our kid's life. Notice the things they're doing well.   Praise them for what they're doing right. Be quick to repair when the relationship has been compromised.  Choose your words carefully when you need to correct them.  2. Meaningful Touch - It's connecting and reassuring, especially in times of stress.  (If they, by nature, don't like to be touched, this would be an exception to keep in mind.)3. Finding a HEALTHY Escape -  such as reading, playing with a pet... Do something to step out of the stress for a short time.  But notice when the escape becomes unhealthy. 4. Be Responsive - We were made to connect with people. Eye contact, talking, interacting are all ways to be responsive and thus bring soothing to your stressed out child.Pt 3 will contain the rest of Amanda's list!Val on Transferring Self-Sufficiency to our Kids even regarding Stress:"As intentional Moms, we want to be constantly in the process of  Transferring Self-Sufficiency to our kids in all areas of their life.  This is a long process, but an important one."  Here's how to Transfer Self-Sufficiency to our kids in every area, including in equipping them 1. Set a good example of monitoring your own stress, mom.  Taking time for MARGIN & watching for SIGNS & SYMPTOMS of stress reaching an unhealthy level.2. Equip your kids with Good Stress Management Habits3. Teach them the philosophy behind the good habit - teach them why it matters.Amanda Colliatie is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Wichita, Kansas. Her practice at Encounter Freedom Therapy Center website or Facebook page is dedicated to providing skilled therapy that is safe, affordable, and practical.Don't ignore the SIGNS that your stress is too much for your body.  Don't make the mistake I made by waiting until the road back to health is a very long road.  At the end of today's episode I share  a way that I've found to reduce inflammation in my body.  Here's a  brand that I like (this is not affiliate link) Look for 95% curcuminoids as an ingredient and Black Pepper (BioPerine).Amanda's Sources:   Dr. Nadine Burke Harris’ book The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity,   The Gottman Institute,  CONNECT with Val:   Val's Facebook Private Community Intentional Mom, Strong Family
2020 has provided plenty of stress for ALL of us.  Today, on the Practically Speaking MOM podcast we're learning how to identify signs of stress and deal with the Grizzly Bears in the room!  We're facing stress head on with our guest stress expert, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Amanda Colliatie!  In week one of three, we look at the aspects below regarding stress.  Then the next two weeks we'll talk about ways to BUFFER stress.Everyone will experience stress and it's normal and healthy, as long as it stays in a healthy level.  We don't need to try to keep all stress away from our children.  Equip our kids to read stress signs and handle stress effectively.Two Types of Stress1. Physical Stress, positive or negative2. Psychological Stress, positive or negativeLevels of Stress1. Normal level of stress that is healthy to experience, mild hassles, minor issues.2. Moderate stress from major life changes - job promotions, move, new baby, death of a loved one, medical diagnosis.3. Toxic stress - stress overload, chronic, overwhelmed, circumstances seem unmanageable feeling hopeless or helpless, thinking about giving upWarning Signs to watch for in Toxic Stress*Small things trigger big feelings*Increased levels of worry, insecurity...*Changes in mood - anxiety, impatient, hopeless*Trouble Sleeping*Consuming more substances that is more than your usual*Life is feeling out of control and you decrease in your ability to functionWhen you see these symptoms, don't REACT but DIG DEEPER, and have an appropriate RESPONSE that can move toward healing or calm.How are you doing at watching for the symptoms in yourself and family members?  Are you overlooking the signs? Are you reacting quickly or having thoughtful response to your stressed-out family member.We also look at some of the physical affects of stress in your body.  Toxic stress affects your body, mind, and emotions.  Extreme stress impacts our bodies as if you're being attacked by a grizzly bear.  What feels like a grizzly bear in your child's life? Or in your own life?    It's time for us to face the bears in our life or the life of our kids - whether they are in us or in our environment.  When is it time to get professional help? We talk about EMDR, a brain-based therapy and finding healing with this method.Amanda Colliatie is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Wichita, Kansas. Her practice at Encounter Freedom Therapy Center website or Facebook page is dedicated to providing skilled therapy that is safe, affordable, and practical.ResourcesSources for some of Amanda's concepts:  A Mind Frozen in Time: A PTSD Recovery Guide by Dr. Jeremy P. Crosby, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris’ book The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity,   SAMHSA Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration's National Child Traumatic Stress Initiative (NCSTI),  Episode 13 Mom's mental Health w/ Amanda Colliatie.CONNECT with Val:   Facebook Private Community:
Every child longs for a loving father.  Every child has a perfect Heavenly Father, and either an imperfect or absent earthly father.  On today's podcast, we'll be talking about all of that - the harmful father, the absent father, the imperfect but loving father, and your child's Heavenly Daddy.   This is an episode of honor and hope as well as some inspiration for marriage and some role modeling of fatherhood, too.  Even the good dads aren't perfect,  but those imperfect loving dads are probably accomplishing more than you might think!No matter what kind of father is in your child's life, even if they have no father at all, your child has a faithful, perfect, loving Heavenly Daddy.   We'll take a brief look at three types of fathers: ⬜The Harming Father⬜The Absent Father⬜The Loving, Imperfect FatherAnd you'll be reminded that no matter what kind of father your child has experienced, they have a loving, Heavenly Daddy who is always with them!Special Thanks, this week, to four dear mamas who were kind enough to share some wisdom.  They each had an absent or harming father experience, and I asked them if they could give me words of wisdom  to pass along to all of you, our Intentional Mom community.  We have moms in all kinds of circumstances, including moms who are raising their children alone.  This is a message of hope for you as well as some practical steps to take if your children don't have a loving father in their life.But that's just a portion of today's special edition episode!  You'll hear from all seven of my children as they recorded some surprise messages.  Each shares from their heart about what mattered most  in their life  regarding their dad, my husband, Rich.  This entire episode was a surprise to my husband, Rich, as he is the editor and publisher of the podcast each week.  Sneaking in an episode without him was a lot of fun for me and the kids  Join in our little surprise, won't you!  It even ends with a short tribute song to their dad, sung by our three youngest children.Resources Mentioned in this episodeFocus on the Family Help line - 1-855-771-HELP (4357)Book: Different Children, Different Needs  by Charles BoydVal's workshop audio: Help! My Home is Full of Difficult Personalities, and One of Them is Mine!Episode 26: Root Parenting: Digging Deeper into the Four Root Areas Behind Your Child's BehaviorEpisode 25: Root Parenting vs. Surface ParentingAndrew Peterson's music and products: andrew-peterson.comCONNECT with Val:  Instagram Practically Speaking MOM Facebook Private Community:
 Chat with Val - Favs for a Healthy Body & Mind. Also, a Legacy Dream Come True! Episode 40❓Do you ever get tired of telling kids "no" they can't watch that movie or show or listen to that music or play that game? ❗Help is here!!! This week on the podcast, I share with you a plan  to reduce that stress, to help you say "no" less because your child has learned to discern and filter to protect their own heart and mind - the process of teaching them to be a gatekeeper to their heart. ❤It's a week about Guarding Our Hearts - Body & Mind             ✔I know you're an intentional parent.  Now help them become intentional to establish good habits and be comfortable with tough conversations - learn how to do this with me on the podcast this week!  Proverbs 4:23 says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it" Please take the time to learn how to do that with your kids in our culture today by listening to this week's podcast!The episode wraps up as I share about a DREAM COME TRUE for me and my  husband's legacy!  What legacy dreams do you have and are you praying for and working toward?   I go into great detail for how we utilize at each stage of childhood from the younger years, to the middle years,  to the upper years.  You need a plan for protecting their heart and mind  AND a plan for teaching them to protect their own heart and mind.  Hear what alternative to rules we have for TV & movies, how we have  conversations about culture topics, what our process is for gradually teaching our children how to be strong GATEKEEPERS OF THEIR OWN HEART & MIND.The culture plan that I share in this episode cuts down on so much stress about the loud cultural messages on TV, movies, music, and games - all of which are reviewed thoroughly on  and I teach you how to use it to it's greatest potential in this episode, so please listen to this important topic.If you want to see your child thrive, equip them for these life issues with a clear system that teaches them along the way how to BECOME their own gatekeeper.  This is one of the most important things we can do - protect their heart & mind, and transferring that responsibility to them. Let me show you how TODAY, on episode 40!Business teacher Michael Hyatt, in an article, "Your Most Important Leadership Tool - Three Reasons Why You Must Guard Your Heart," says "If your heart is unhealthy, it threatens everything else 1. becasue your heart is extremely valuable 2. because your heart is the source of everything you do 3. because your heart is under constant  attackI am seeking to raise leaders who don't cower to bullies, shrink back from obstacles, or linger in the cesspool in the depraved alleys of our world.My long term goal is that they'd be in the habit of thinking before they expose their minds to the things that are destructive to their hearts.. Learn how on today's podcast!Mentioned: Spice and Tea Exchange that's located at the Branson Landing.  When you go, also visit Nika's OliveCONNECT with Val:   Facebook Private Community:
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