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Stop Drinking and Start Living
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Stop Drinking and Start Living

Author: Mary Wagstaff

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Fed up with not being able to trust yourself around alcohol? Sick of the hangxiety killing your confidence to commit to that next level goal? Changing your relationship to alcohol isn’t just about NOT drinking, it’s a journey of rediscovering WHO YOU ARE on the other side of alcohol. No matter what kind of relationship you want with alcohol, there is always room for more awareness, this is where we start. From the daily mental friction of deciding to drink or not to drink, only to break your own heart again, to the days lost from the effects of alcohol...If you have been hearing a call from your higher self, that it’s time for a change, but you are confused on the what and how, Expert Holistic Alcohol Coach, Mary Wagstaff, is here to walk you through the threshold of the next phase of your life where alcohol becomes irrelevant. She ended a 20 year relationship with alcohol without labels, counting days or ever making excuses and is helping her clients do the same. In this podcast we will explore her revolutionary approach to getting alcohol out of your way that breaks all the rules, life enhancing tools you can implement now, so YOU can stop drinking and start LIVING the life you were made for! This show is not a substitute for rehabilitation, medical treatment or advice. Please talk to a health professional if your alcohol consumption is a risk to your mental/physical health or others. Schedule a call with Mary to find out more about her 1:1 coaching mentorship. Taking your last sip isn't' the first step, saying YES to YOU is. www.marywagstaffcoach.com
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How can the thing that causes you so much pain, also be the same thing you can't imagine living without?Breaking promises to yourself on the daily? Your not happy with the relationship you have with alcohol, but you are always giving in to your desires and can't imagine life without it? End the drama by making a choice to UNDERSTAND WHY this is happening. This is a 100% normal, you or your brain are not broken. It is simply that you haven't practiced how to process emotions. Every time you have had a specific emotion in the past, subconsciously, you have responded with a drink.You may not consciously KNOW, this is how you are solving for an emotion, and it doesn't even have to be a negative one.The act of drinking isn't the problem. It is getting comfortable with first being with an emotion and proving to yourself that a drink doesn't change your circumstances, it just masks the emotion. As a reflection for self inquiry this week:What would your life look like without alcohol?What benefits to you gain from alcohol that you aren't capable of creating your own?When you have the urge to drink, or it's time to decide: Ask yourself: What emotion am I experiencing right now? What are the sensations in my body that it is producing?To change anything in your life: You have to start making decisions you feel good about, that is the only thing that makes it "the right time".Schedule your complimentary alignment session HERE
When it comes to changing your relationship with alcohol, your Emotions and Thoughts directly impact the rate (the ETA) at which you achieve success. The very specific Emotion and Thought is what’s going to drive the Action to eventually achieve the goal or result you want in life. In today’s episode you will learn:*The exact process I teach my clients to maintain emotional and mental hygiene.*How our emotions and thoughts become habitual, just like drinking, how to identify and interrupt them.*Learn HOW to manage your mind, honor your emotions and create the formula to inspire *Action, to achieve any goal, including, changing the habit of drinking.*Understand the thoughts getting you stuck are creating low vibrating emotions.* How inaction is also an action and a choice.*How to self coach yourself in any situation to get one step closer to no longer desiring alcohol.*How to spot and interrupt habitual thought patterning that is keeping you stuck and drinking.*Learn how to create your dreams on purpose instead of reacting to the circumstances of life.I use the term ETA as a double meaning. It really represents your Emotions, Thoughts and Actions.  That combination will also determine your Estimated time of arrival to your destination. Habitual ETA’s that have become your routine are often negative and fear based. Intentional ETA’s are what you MUST generate in order to achieve NEW goals and get to NEW places in your life. Example: After work (habitual thought pattern that you are unaware of)Emotion: overwhelmedThought: Work is so stressfulAction: DrinkResult: Numb the emotion (leave the work stress until tomorrow)Example: After work (new ETA generated on purpose)Emotion: calmThought: I'm so glad I am home to relaxAction: go to bed earlyResult: Feel refreshed ready to respond with grace to lifeThe other option is: Why is work so stressful? Why is that a problem? Is that true? Does drinking solve the REAL issues at work? AND... there is also simply FEELING the emotion without changing it at all. Putting your legs up the wall and breathing the day away.Reach out with any questions for the show! Mary@marywagstaffcoach.comAs a big THANK YOU for being part of my journey, I made you a special gift to love yourself more: Click HERE for instant access to the Compassion guided audio track.If you don't know it: You are amazing and I LOVE YOU! If you are ready to stop waiting for change and ready to make it happen:  Schedule a complimentary alignment session HERE.  Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
WE DID IT!!! One Year Of  Stop Drinking and Start Living Podcast! Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. I couldn't have done it without your support. On today's episode I speak to all of the beliefs I had to learn, unlearn and my willingness to be wrong to create a successful business and consistent podcast with my heart at the center.How my authenticity is really what has driven not only the success of the show, but what has made if fun, enjoyable and an act of true service to the world. And how NONE of it would have been possible had I not been living an Alcohol Free Life.I speak to the necessity of trusting your intuition. Staying true to who you are uniquely, and how everything you truly desire is available to you now and on the other side of the habit of alcohol. It is a moment to reflect on my personal achievements and my humbled honor of being called to do this work. I hope today's show is an example of what's possible when you Stop Drinking and Start Living! As a big THANK YOU for being part of my journey, I made you a special gift to love yourself more: Click HERE for instant access to the Compassion guided audio track.If you don't know it: You are amazing and I LOVE YOU! If you are ready to stop waiting for change and ready to make it happen:  Schedule a complimentary alignment session HERE.  Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”― RumiThe Hidden Costs Of Alcohol Are Deeper When You Frame The Question With Possibility Rather Than The Status Quo. There is the Screw it I need to relax, but at what cost? One innocent night, then 20 years later and you have never asked yourself, do I really want this? What exactly do I deserve? Have I ever tried to relax on my own?When I meet with my clients for the first time, I find out every area of their life alcohol is effecting. It’s been running the underground show for so long, that the status quo of low level vibrations has become the new norm. But what’s possible if alcohol wasn’t in your way?The answer for how is alcohol impacts, work, love, sex, get’s a different answer than:What’s possible if alcohol is no longer in your way? From this place, a world opens that alcohol can't touch. To get to the bottom of problems, you have to ask different questions. Alcohol is a problem because you keep trying to solve it with the same method: Fear, worry, regret and evidence from the past. On today's Podcast Episode (Ep. #74)  you will take away:-How to use these hidden costs as tools for change, rather then sources of regret.-Understanding why you default to fear rather than possibility.-Why we choose self sabotage over risking failure.- The BIGGEST hidden of all and is what you need most to heal, evolve and awaken from alcohol, forever. If you are ready to live into possibly,  Schedule a complimentary alignment session HERE.  Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
Boredom and Loneliness: How to process emotional cravings. Nothing has gone wrong! These are the two biggest emotions people try to solve with alcohol. Why? We think they are wrong and bad. You make them mean something is wrong with you. Emotions are not problems to be solved, they are experiences to have. What are you making it mean about you and how is that compounding your judgement? What if is was day dreaming and alone time? Same thing, different perspective.What you will take away from today's showHow to stop disappointing yourselfThe underlying implications of loneliness and boredomwhy Your thoughts about boar dome and loneliness are what create the emotions that trigger the desire to drinkHow to combat boredom and loneliness (shift your desire for alcohol into something that creates lasting change.)Seeing beyond the veil of alcohol as a companion3 step process to shift from resistance and avoiding of what is to allowing and compassion.If you are ready to stop waiting for change and ready to make it happen:  Schedule a complimentary alignment session HERE.  Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
Why does alcohol seem so important to you, even when it doesn’t add any real value or meaning to your life?The experiences you are having are happening with or without alcohol, so what’s the deal?From the day we are born, we experience trauma. We are set to become "socialized", told we need to be different than how we would naturally act. Some of this to protect our lives, some of it to preserve the power over model.  Alcohol is a way to numb what already feels so disconnected. Who you ARE and who you think you are "suppose" to be.  Alcohol will never be what you want it to be. It is a temporary illusion. The real solution lives inside of becoming more of you, without apology. What you will take away from this episode:-How to see alcohol as neutral and choose on purpose from the place of nonjudgmental awareness.-Ways to add more meaning and value to your life.-how to override the narrative of the habit,  that alcohol is important.-how to shift from the persecutive that life is happening to you, rather life is HAPPENING AS YOU.-rise above the noise that alcohol is a problem that needs to be solved.-how to process grieving the part of you that is attached to creating meaning out of alcohol.If you are ready to stop waiting for change and ready to make it happen:  Schedule a complimentary alignment session HERE.  Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
When you are examining your relationship to alcohol, it's important to stay open to what works for you, what resonates with you deeply. As my guest today, Tricia Lewis, of Recovery Happy Hour explains, as you grow from alcohol, the way you show up to your life and recovery will too. Don't get stuck in a box.  Tricia shares with us her story of perfectionism and having to detox from alcohol when she could no longer get away with functioning at the rate she was going. She discovered that you could be addicted to alcohol and look normal on the outside.  As she explored various modalities of recovery, the one thing she knew she needed and didn't want to loose, was community after being in the service industry for so many years. She created the amazing podcast, Recovery Happy Hour, to support those on the journey of recovery and share the diversity of stories and ways to seek support so all people can find a way to connect and know they are never alone on this road. Thank you Tricia! Recovery Happy Hour IGRecovery Happy Hour SpotifyIf you are ready for support NOW, with high level, 1:1 coaching. Schedule a complimentary alignment session HEREThank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
In today's episode you hear me interview by Lyn and Erika Hicks of The Magical Holistic Healing Arts Podcast. We explore the natural discovery process of Womanhood and how to embrace our feminine essence as pleasure, purpose and privilege.  The story of how I came to "answer the calling of the Goddess."  From that point, alcohol was no longer a desirable option.  The invitation of getting rid of alcohol isn't replacing it with another label, it's filling it with more of who you are that naturally wants to come through. It is a process of self discovery and deep, deep, commitment to the sprit of the self in your own unique and miraculous way. You are a gift and alcohol is dimming your light. If you are ready for support NOW, with high level, 1:1 coaching. Schedule a complimentary alignment session HEREThank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
Decisions, decisions. The better we get at making decisions, the better our lives become. We will always have a brain that wants to default to the negative until you practice observation. Ever thought in your brain, even if you BELIVE it with all your heart, creates a vibration, an emotion. When you tell yourself, I don't have the time, money, energy, even if you believe it, what EMOTION does it generate? One of fear and lack. If you try on a new thought to: I am in charge of my schedule so I can make whatever I want a priority, you can see how the vibe changes. What are your thoughts about WHY you haven't started the process of stopping> Chances are they are generating negative emotions, compounding the desire to drink and the story that to stop drinking is too hard. Ditch the story, let it stay where it is, and find some new better feeling or neutral thoughts.  And remember, there are no WRONG decisions, there are only your thoughts about them. Take this as truth and you take your power back. Happy Birthday MOM! Enjoy this New Moon Blessing. If you are ready for support NOW, with high level, 1:1 coaching. Schedule a complimentary alignment session HEREThank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
How many times have you googled, "Am I am alcoholic"? or some version of that?  As we start seeing the illusions of the old models of power over and limiting beliefs, fade into the back ground, the invitation in the aquarian age, is to stop asking permission. You decide how much is too much. Dismantling alcohol mean stepping into your power and standing in your truth. To stop needing the right thing to say to someone when they ask why you aren't drinking. To be able to love yourself, the other AND tell the truth. The aquarian age is about living 5D, where paradox is the way of life.  It's way more fun. You don't need to break the rules, there are none. The are all illusions.  It's not either or, it's both and.  The truth is, alcohol is stripping you of your life light, your prana, your grace, the holy spirit within. Whether it's one drink a week or 20, there is an unnatural alteration. We aren't saying NO to alcohol. The future of joyful living is evolving past the need to alter ones natural state of being. FAST TRACK TO FREEDOM FROM ALCOHOL IN 40 DAYS! Get on the list, find out the detail and start the process HEREIf you are ready for support NOW, with high level, 1:1 coaching. Schedule a complimentary alignment session HEREThank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. NYT Article Article: Vodka in your Coffee...
For this final episode of the year, I talk about the process of commitment. The traditional New Years Resolution, comes with no parameters other than to "resolve" to change, usually the action. Something we think we should do to be better or healthier. We can not be successful in having a new , healthier relationship to alcohol by simply NOT DRINKING. To resolve to something is to learn a new way, to commit to a new process. This takes time. You have never become an expert at anything over night. You most certainly didn't develop a drinking habit over night. You must be compassionate with yourself and offer yourself time to learn a new way, seek new awarenesses, educate yourself with new tools and practice them until they become THE new way. There is no quick fix, but there is an easier way to UNLEAERN the habit of drinking. The first step, resolve to commit, not just quit.  It takes loving yourself more, and deep trust in the process of surrender. To get started on the process of getting alcohol out of your way, schedule a private call with Mary: CLICK HERE Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
Founder of My Sober Girl Friends, Naomi Veak, shares her beautiful journey of self discover and the joys of sobriety on the other side of a long term addiction with Pot and Alcohol. She speaks to finding the path that works for you and questioning, why do we have the need to alter the beauty of this life. It takes a simple shift of slowing down and being with what is. Approaching life from a new and different pace, to find the natural wonders and joys from this gift of life. Find more out about Naomi and My Sober Girl Friends Virtual Friendship Gatheringshttps://www.mysobergirlfriends.com/https://www.instagram.com/mysobergirlfriends/To get started on the process of getting alcohol out of your way, schedule a private call with Mary: CLICK HERE Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show! Your presence means so much to me. 
Your story around alcohol is just that, conditioned beliefs that create a judgment about what's possible. You don't need to replace them with Sober Living Is Better. You can simply allow the resistance to change and ask, can I simply let this go? Can I make space for what I KNOW deep down to be true? Then the process of shifting alcohol is allowing the resistance to feel, to change to be with how you naturally show up. One this auspicious day as time stands still, can you become quiet enough to hear the truth of your light shining through? It is enough. You don't need to replace alcohol with sobriety, you replace it with more of you.Start your journey on a private call with Mary. Schedule HERE.mary@marywagstaffcoach.comFor questions and podcast inquiries. xxoo
The way you got into your relationship with alcohol, isn't the same way you get out. If you want to live a more joyful deprivation free life that is.  When we live attached to our labels and stories of the past, we cling to the outer world to fill a void inside to create a sense of inner wholeness.  In endless pursuit of finding wholeness that can only be experienced here and NOW,  makes the desire for alcohol greater.  You use alcohol to fill the un-fillable hole, but to also numb the discomfort of the endless search for wholeness. The solution is a simple shift in perspective and the willingness to detach from all that you have identified as. This is the process I teach my 1:1 coaching clients.  How to shift into the NOW where you are whole and problems only exist if we think they do. To get started on the process of getting alcohol out of your way, schedule a private call with me and I will teach you my 3 steps process to interrupting a craving.  CLICK HERE Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show.As a member of the podcast community you are invited to: The next one will be 12/27/20Live Coaching/Q&A  Every Last Sunday of the Month at 11am PST.  This is an amazing opportunity to gain clarity around your relationship to alcohol and concepts on the show! For More Information & To Register To CLICK HERE(100% Confidential & Free)The Power Of Now, Eckhart Tolle
The first step to changing your relationship to alcohol and making it easier to say no to a drink, is to understand why you say yes in the first place. Your thoughts are what make or break any habit. You must know what your "belief story" around alcohol is, to know what you want it to become.  We don't walk around thinking all of our thoughts and beliefs are BS, but the truth is, they are our interpretation of the world and subjective.  The human brain will continue to find evidence for what it knows, to it's detriment. The most important things is not to threaten the selfie system, this is what makes the conflict grow. Rather offer compassion and curiosity to all of you. There will always be something that no longer serves us, alcohol is a double whammy with such a strong reward, but we must make friends with our habits, they are hard one and our inner critic also isn't going anywhere. Get to know her, and get to cultivate a much more intimate relationship with yourself, underneath the urge to drink just might be a woman who needs some long overdue TLC. Schedule complimentary a 1:1 mini session With Mary HERE Thank you for heading to Apple Podcast To Drop a 5 Star Review and What You LOVE about the show.Live Coaching/Q&A  Every Last Sunday of the Month at 11am PST. For More Information & To Register To CLICK HERE(100% Confidential & Anonymous)
If you started 2020 with a resolution to change alcohol, and didn't quite get there, I have an amazing opportunity for you to FIND FREEDOM FROM ALCOHOL BEFORE 2021!JOIN MY LIVE MASTER CLASS Dec 6, 2020 11:00 AM Pacific TimeREGISTER HERE!!If you have a love/hate relationship with alcohol you may feel like you have 2 options: 1) Resign to a life of drinking, anxiety and sluggishness.2) Quit drinking and live in shame, boredom and deprivation forever.I would like to invite you to consider the third option...3) Find freedom from alcohol by dropping the judgment, getting curious, and deciding ahead of time all of your results in life.Feel amazing and inspired about what's to come, because you know a new way to solve for alcohol getting in your way.You CAN feel confident that you have a perfect plan for your drinking that you decided ahead of time and feel great about.In this class, you will take away the exact process and tools I teach my clients:-Overcome any urge/craving-Identify the real problem of why drinking less seems so hard.-Process all hard emotions rather than resist them.-How to stay committed to the journey of dismantling alcohol in your life.-Feeling confident, refreshed and excited with a Step by Step Process- Enjoy the extraordinary experience of being YOU and Living LifeJoin Holistic Alcohol Coach and Host of the Podcast Stop Drinking and Start Living, Mary Wagstaff, for an engaging action filled, class, like she has never taught before. Learn tools you can apply to your life immediately to start to get alcohol out of your way and have a fresh start before the new year even begins!Reach out with any questions. YAY! Get ready to be inspired.This is 100% confidential & private class on zoom.I can't wait to see you there, Mary WagstaffSchedule a 1:1 call with Mary HERE!
Ep. #62 Remembrance

Ep. #62 Remembrance

2020-12-0230:47

This week we talk about the felt sense of remembrance.  Different from the yearning of nostalgia, remembrance is the homecoming that reminds us of who we are truly outside of story. Alcohol covers this sentiment up from us. Remembrance is a subtle knowing of deep peace and being that only exists when we observe the mind from the place of unconditional love, rather than attach to thoughts based on fear. FIND FREEDOM FROM ALCOHOL BEFORE 2021: LIVE CLASS SUNDAY DECEMBER 6TH, 2020 11AM PST! REGISTER HERELEARN MY REVOLUTIONARY 5 SHIFTS APPROACH TO DRINKING LESS FOREVERIf you have a love/hate relationship with alcohol you may feel like you have 2 options: 1) Resign to a life of drinking, anxiety and sluggishness.2) Quit drinking and live in shame, boredom and deprivation forever.I would like to invite you to consider the third option...3) Find freedom from alcohol by dropping the judgment, getting curious, and deciding ahead of time all of your results in life.Feel amazing and inspired about what's to come, because you know a new way to solve for alcohol getting in your way.You CAN feel confident that you have a perfect plan for your drinking that you decided ahead of time and feel great about.In this class, you will take away the exact process and tools I teach my clients
Chasing the BUZZ of Nostalgia is one of the BIGGEST obstacle to accept and understand when you explore your reationship to alcohol or stop drinking.  This concept is what keeps so many people in deprivation AFTER they stop drinking. It's like they are living under a spell of what alcohol NEVER WAS, but they can't snap out of it, why? Because they didn't have me as their coach! LOL. Seriously.  The nostalgia of alcohol  is actually an error in the human brain that makes NO sense. It goes to show you just how STRONG of a concentrated reward the alcohol is to make the brain completely ERASE all of the painful things about alcohol, and only remember the carols and laughter. You are in for a wild ride. Schedule your free alignment session with Mary HERE
10. BEEN THERE, DONE THAT. ALCOHOL ISN’T GOING ANYWHERE, It will never be more amazing than it was the last time you drink. The alcohol doesn’t create the experience, YOU DO! Alcohol doesn’t evolve into something more sophisticated or more enlightened. You’ve done it all at this point.9. BOOST YOUR IMMUNITY8. KEEP YOUR INHIBITIONS IN CHECK7. BE THE EMOTIONALLY STABLE ONE FOR OTHERS WHO MAY NEED SUPPORT6. LEAD BY EXAMPLE (take the high road, step out of judgment into curiosity. You can love AND tell the truth) generate a list of questions that take the focus off of you. 5. SAVE YOUR ENERGY (future focus for that evening, the next day and into the week)4. EXPLORE CURIOSITY (whats your experience with your food, the music, your body etc…?)3. CREATE A NEW RITUAL: 2020 IS ALL ABOUT OUT WITH THE OLDTRADITIONS ARE ONLY USEFUL IF THEY ARE SUPPORTIVE OF EVOLUTION.WE DON’T JUST DO SOMETHING BECAUSE OUR GRANDPARENTS DID.2. FIND THE REAL MEANING OF THIS SEASON (hint: it’s not about getting wasted and missing the whole thing, you might as well just take a nap!)1.HONOR YOUR TRUTH: “Your intuition is guiding you towards your highest good for your highest good”. Laura AszmanSchedule a free alignment session with Mary HEREHula Hoop Instructor Laura Aszman on  Ep. #39 
Today we talk about Alcohol as a rite of passage into adulthood. Alcohol as a rite of passage is completely void of the tools necessary to step into the future as independent  & connected to our feminine power of emotional intelligence and embodied intuition.We need to embrace and embody these aspects to become sovereign Women, claiming personal responsibility and moving through limitations with excitement to meet the challenge, rather than fear of failure.  Honoring your life with the sacred journey of Dismantling Alcohol, and Sobriety, is the rites of passage you and only you can claim for your self to what this life and your growth mean and represent.Email Mary with Questions for the show: Mary@marywagsaffcoach.comSchedule your free alignment call with Mary HERE
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