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The Truth About Goals

The Truth About Goals

2022-11-3022:32

Todays episode is for you if you wonder IF you can achieve that important goal. I will share what I have learned about this important skill and you will be surprised at what actually works.                                 Books and Essays I cite:Finish, by Jon AcuffThe Happiness Curve, by Jonathan Rausch, esp. p.101 where you can read more about  the principles of progress and adaptation. Miswanting Miswanting: Some Problems in the Forecasting ofFuture Affective StatesCitationGilbert, D. T., & Wilson, Timothy D. ”Miswanting: Some problems in the forecasting of futureaffective states.” In Thinking and feeling: The role of affect in social cognition, edited by JosephP. Forgas, 178-197. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2000.Permanent linkhttp://nrs.harvard.edu/urn-3:HUL.InstRepos:14549983Terms of UseThis article was downloaded from Harvard University’s DASH repository, 
The Road to Courage

The Road to Courage

2022-11-1523:10

This episode ha been one of the most popular over the last year. We are on hiatus and will be back for season 6 in a few weeks. In the meantime please enjoy this episode and don't forget our website is still open: misfitmentor.comThere are blogs, video teachings and if you need to you can even schedule a free call with me. See you in a few weeks.God bless you,Dr. Larry Merino
The Truth About Aging

The Truth About Aging

2022-11-0820:28

In todays' episode we discover that everything we know about aging is wrong. And that there are a lot of pleasant surprises waiting for those who gain a clearer understanding of what actually happens when you're in the 40's. Books I refer to: The Happiness Curve, by Jonathan Rausch. Rausch digs into the research and makes a compelling argument about aging.Find  Your Why, by Simon Sinek. This author helps you connect to what is important for you. If you don't know why you do something, the chances are good you will stop doing it. 
In today's episode we will get a better handle on the worst kind of pressure -- the self-inflicted kind. What makes this kind of pressure so bad is that you can often believe it is being created by others but again, it is the guy or gal in the mirror who is the culprit. Please listen and use these suggestions. I also referred to Robert Fritz, Your Life as Art, p. 189.
Limiting Beliefs with Cognitive Behavioral Therapist Miles Nitz. Part 2.Contact Miles at 260-415-5967takechargecounseling.orgmnitz@takechargecounseling.org
Limiting Beliefs with Cognitive Behavioral Therapist Miles Nitz. Part 1.Contact Miles at 260-415-5967takechargecounseling.orgmnitz@takechargecounseling.org
In this episode we will unpack a secret to success -- but one that is out there  in plain sight. 
For many years I have had some wonderful conversations on my front porch. Today I invite you to join me there. 
The Road to Courage

The Road to Courage

2022-09-2022:38

In this episode Executive Coach Peggy Zilz tells us what she went through in her 40’s that helped her to understand the value of courage at a deeper level. Books: Constructive Living by David Reynolds              Why You Can’t Be Anything You Want by Arthur MillerSelf-Development Programs: The Gallup Strengths Finder. You can find the assessment at:  www.gallup.comYou can visit misfit mentor.com to find our blogs, video teachings and mentoring pdf’s You can write me a line at larry@misfitmentor.com
In this interview with media and radio executive Scott Howard, talks about some of the trouble he got into in his 40’s that he knows now could have been avoided. There are lessons here you’ll need to navigate through  your 40’s. You can visit misfit mentor.com to find our blogs, video teachings and mentoring pdf’s You can write me a line at larry@misfitmentor.com
In our first episode of season 5 Executive pastor Matt Switzer teaches us how to navigate through some treacherous times in 40’s. Book: The Happiness Curve by John RauschYou can visit misfit mentor.com to find our blogs, video teachings and mentoring pdf’s You can write me a line at larry@misfitmentor.com
Thriving in Your 40's

Thriving in Your 40's

2022-08-3025:32

Coming Out

Coming Out

2022-08-2319:11

In this first episode we deal with a very common experience for those who deviate from the cultural norm or from what we were expected to do or to be. There is plenty of disappointment to go around in these situations but when you are “the disappointer” it can be brutal. Coming out doesn’t have to be the gut-wrenching anxiety-producing event you imagine it to be. This episode can help.  
Sometimes we chase the things that we think will empower us but only weaken us. There are lot of fake and phony ways that masquerade as empowerment when in fact, the real ways to empowerment are not even being considered. So, on this last show of season 3  I wanted to leave you with something to ponder -- something you can really use for real and powerful empowerment.
Fake and Phony solutions sound so believable. That's what makes them so poisonous. When we buy a fake and phony solution we always become immobilized and are tempted to give up on ourselves.                      Show NotesFake and Phony Solutions still exist because:1. we all have a lot of feelings we'd rather not feel2. we want these fake solutions to be true3. those who sell the fake solutions are very convincing(From 3-2-1 Thursdays by James Clear)Writer Jorge Luis Borges on transforming every experience into a resource:"A writer — and, I believe, generally all persons — must think that whatever happens to him or her is a resource. All things have been given to us for a purpose, and an artist must feel this more intensely. All that happens to us, including our humiliations, our misfortunes, our embarrassments, all is given to us as raw material, as clay, so that we may shape our art."Source: Twenty-Four Conversations with Borges: Including a Selection of PoemsYou are able to stay away from fake and phony solutions but you must1 Create and be very clear on what it you want to create -- not what others want you to do.2. Commit to the craft of your dream. Not for a month or year but for your whole life. Besides, what else have you got to do but get better and better at creating what you want to create?3. Stop Comparing yourself to others. You cannot make a judgement of your own self based on what others do and who they are. 
3rd Culture Kids

3rd Culture Kids

2022-08-0228:28

Third Culture Kids: Are you familiar with term “3rd culture kid”?  A 3rd culture kid (AKA TCK’s) is someone who grew up in one culture and then found themselves in another one. Gypsies who deviate from the cultural norm and Misfits who want to do different things and do them differently are considered TCK’s.  Being a TCK has a lot of benefits but like everything else it has a dark side and if you’re not aware of it you can end up in some pretty dark places. In today’s episode we’ll show you how to stay in the light. 
Today's episode helps us to beware of the self-sabotage  that we often fall into just as we get closer to our goals. We also have to especially aware of families' way of doing the same thing. 
Winners and Losers

Winners and Losers

2022-07-1924:37

In this episode from 2021 we learn how important it is to pay attention to our authentic self more than our social image and status. 
In the Hans Christian Andersen story, "The Emperor's New Clothes" it's a dumb little kid who turns out to be the smartest person in he crowd.There are plenty of reasons to be the dumbest person in the room and in today's episode you will learn why it's a smart move. 
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