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Define U Radio

Author: Valencia Griffin-Wallace

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Have you ever wondered what real people really talk about when the gloves are off? Do you think you are the only one who thinks like you do about the world today? Are you ready to hear adult conversations? In today’s world, the ignorant and biased people are loud. They don’t represent the “silent” majority’s views or how we really feel. On After Dark, I have conversations with friends of the show about life, love and more. Sometimes, we agree and are on the same page. Other times we disagree, but either way everyone’s opinion is respected and represented here.

Valencia is an author, speaker, and a business owner. Most of all, she is a wife, mother and a black woman maneuvering everything from foster parenting to dealing with racism to questioning systematic programming by the media. "Have conversations that mean something!”

Join the conversation every Wednesday at 9pm cst for new episodes (unless we are on a mental health break) and start a conversation with your friends, family, and foes.
198 Episodes
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Ever wondered how real friendships and sisterhoods start? The next two episodes explores the dynamics of the sisterhood between the host, Valencia Griffin-Wallace and Queen Co hosts, Lyvonne Copeland and Shannon Ward. Sisterhoods aren't made overnight. Finding those that understand you, support you and lovingly guide you the right way is what we all need. As we look back on who we were and how we came together, most will find inspiration that a true sisterhood can be built. We also discuss why it is very important for others to build friendships. Join the conversation if you want to understand how real sisterhoods are built to last. Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/lyvonnecopeland/ (Follow Lyvonne on social media) https://www.lyvonnecopeland.com/ (www.lyvonnecopeland.com) https://www.instagram.com/thereal_che_don/ (Follow Shannon on social media) http://www.chedonmusic.com/index.html (www.chedonmusic.com) Connect with the show: Facebook-https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U ) Instagram-https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U ) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
Ever wondered how real friendships and sisterhoods start? The next two episodes explores the dynamics of the sisterhood between the host, Valencia Griffin-Wallace and Queen Co hosts, Lyvonne Copeland and Shannon Ward. We share the parts of our story people most forget...the pain. The show takes an interesting turn as we ask each other questions and realize how years later, we are more connected than ever before. There is a part 2, so make sure you stay tuned to hear the conclusion and some tips for building a sisterhood. Join the conversation if you want to understand how real sisterhoods are built to last. Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/lyvonnecopeland/ (Follow Lyvonne on social media) https://www.lyvonnecopeland.com/ (www.lyvonnecopeland.com) https://www.instagram.com/thereal_che_don/ (Follow Shannon on social media) http://www.chedonmusic.com/index.html (www.chedonmusic.com) Connect with the show: Facebook-https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U ) Instagram-https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U ) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
Are you using your current relationship to get over your last? Are you considering giving someone another chance? Queen friend of the show, Donna Barnes joins the conversation about getting hurt rebounding and giving a past relationship a do over. Have you been a rebound and did it go to something bigger? Join the conversation to hear things to consider before you go or stay Key Topics and Things Mentioned: What exactly is a rebound relationship How much disclosure is necessary What to consider before giving someone a second chance Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/gracefullypurposedcounseling/ (Follow Donna on social media) https://www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com/contact (www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
How do you know when a relationship is over? Do you make a speedy exit or try to work it out because of responsibilities? Queen friend of the show, Donna Barnes joins the conversation about relationships and love. We also discuss cheating and who we think cheats more. If you have ever wondered should you leave or stay, this is the show for you. Women often try to make it work especially if children are involved. Or is that a stereotype? Join the conversation to hear things to consider before you go or stay Key Topics and Things Mentioned: How do you know when a relationship is over Is it worth salvaging when you have been hurt The point of no return in most relationships and more!!! Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/gracefullypurposedcounseling/ (Follow Donna on social media) https://www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com/contact (www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
Are you letting the opinions and pressures from the outside change who you are on the inside? This special Valentines episode is all about loving, uplifting and supporting black women in their greatness. Message clips from special peoples in the host, co hosts and others who have something to say. This is the episode that will make you love yourself more even when you are struggling with media messages, personal low self esteem or just need a pick me up. Tips are given that you can practice in your own life to build your self confidence and self love. Loving yourself as a black woman doesn't mean you don't love others, it just means you love yourself more. If you want to join a conversation around black women love, uplifting and supporting each other, Join the conversation Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/lyvonnecopeland/ (Follow Lyvonne on social media) https://www.lyvonnecopeland.com/ (www.lyvonnecopeland.com) https://www.instagram.com/thereal_che_don/ (Follow Shannon on social media) http://www.chedonmusic.com/index.html (www.chedonmusic.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
In getting the love you want; how much are you willing to compromise? In this episode, the queens discuss everything from salacious women to relationships that change over time. Relationships right now are different. Between pandemic babies and you are not the one during this pandemic, relationships are changing some for better and others for worse. Can men and women be friends if they are in relationships with others? The queens discuss their feeling on males and females being friends. Shannon is open to her significant other having female friends. Lyvonne is okay if she likes the woman and Valencia is hands down no indeed. What are your thoughts? How would you handle your child’s relationship if something was going on you didn’t like? Yeah, we go there too! If you want to join a conversation around friends, boundaries and more in love, this is your show! Join the conversation Key Topics and Things Mentioned: Controlling or Crazy In Love Being Involved in Your Child's Relationships Should You Compromise or Change Pandemic Relationship Transitions and More! Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/lyvonnecopeland/ (Follow Lyvonne on social media) https://www.lyvonnecopeland.com/ (www.lyvonnecopeland.com) https://www.instagram.com/thereal_che_don/ (Follow Shannon on social media) http://www.chedonmusic.com/index.html (www.chedonmusic.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
What is the difference between the people you commit to and people you don’t? As you get older, love changes because we as people change. In this episode, the queens share there thoughts on love before and during the pandemic. We discuss our love languages and how that has changed in the past year. Should a relationship be 50/50 or 100/100? What is the difference? Shannon shares what has and will make her commit to a relationship. Do you really know when you are in love and it is time to commit? Valencia discusses how she gave up talking to other people because she found her kind of crazy. Lyvonne tells the us that knowing that she felt protected is what made her commit to her husband. Yes, you can find love during the pandemic or you might even have it already. If you are ready to get some real love tips, this is your show! Join the conversation to get ready to more love in your life. Key Topics and Things Mentioned: What makes a woman commit Is keeping the “same” energy throughout a relationship important What is really important to women today Expectations of love and more! Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/lyvonnecopeland/ (Follow Lyvonne on social media) https://www.lyvonnecopeland.com/ (www.lyvonnecopeland.com) https://www.instagram.com/thereal_che_don/ (Follow Shannon on social media) http://www.chedonmusic.com/index.html (www.chedonmusic.com) Connect with the show: Facebook-https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U ) Instagram-https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U ) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
Does negative behavior run in your family? Are you the curse breaker? How much of your behavior is nurture vs nature? Friend of the show, Donna Barnes joins the conversation about generational curses. How much does how you are raised play a part in who you become? Maybe a lot or maybe a little. We also discuss how society judges children who come from certain environments. Valencia shares how being a control freak probably saved her from a lot of harmful behavior. Being raised in the same environment doesn't make people the same. Motivation and mentality may be the change maker in the life of most people. Join the conversation to learn how you can change the direction of generational curses. Key Topics and Things Mentioned: What exactly is a generational curse Environment vs DNA: who wins How to rise when you are different Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/gracefullypurposedcounseling/ (Follow Donna on social media) https://www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com/contact (www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
Have you had "the talk" with your children about racism? In this episode, the queens discuss having to the talk with their children about racism and being black in America. Did 2020 show more racism or was it just brought more to the forefront by people who don't experience it? We also discuss "forgiveness" when racist acts take place and where we stand. In today's world, everyone should be having the talk not only with their children but their family and friends. Lyvonne shares how an incident prompted her to have the talk with her son. Whereas, Shannon's son ask questions and she gives him answers plus some. Either way, everyone should be honest with themselves and their children. If not, are you really preparing them for the world. Join the conversation to get tips to having those difficult conversations with the younger children in your family. Key Topics and Things Mentioned: The different ways we handled the talk Tips to having the talk with your children Preparing your children for the world Why people of all races need to have some form of the talk Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/lyvonnecopeland/ (Follow Lyvonne on social media) https://www.lyvonnecopeland.com/ (www.lyvonnecopeland.com) https://www.instagram.com/thereal_che_don/ (Follow Shannon on social media) http://www.chedonmusic.com/index.html (www.chedonmusic.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
The conversation focuses on releasing and letting go of the things that happened in 2020. On this episode of After Dark host, Valencia discusses mental health with therapist, Donna Barnes. Donna gives shares how to release and then refocus on our own personal mental health. She also stresses the importance of acknowledging the stress that children may be going through and how to discuss it. 2020 affected everyone differently especially if you are an extroverted person. Feelings of despair may be overwhelming, however not dealing with the good, bad and ugly of 2020 will keep you from taking 2021 by the horns and succeeding. Join the conversation to hear how you can apply the lessons to have a better year. Key Topics and Things Mentioned: Accepting what you can not change Having tough conversations with your children How the pandemic affect introverts and extroverts differently Social distance and Emotional distance Show Links https://www.facebook.com/valencia.gwallace (Follow Valencia on social media) https://www.valenciagwallace.com/ (www.valenciagwallace.com) https://www.instagram.com/gracefullypurposedcounseling/ (Follow Donna on social media) https://www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com/contact (www.gracefullypurposedcounseling.com) Connect with the show: https://www.facebook.com/thedefineu (The Define U on FB) https://www.instagram.com/thedefineu/ (The Define U on IG) Subscribe: You can subscribe to Define U Radio on iTunes, Google Podcast, and anywhere you listen to podcast. If you liked the conversation, go on a listening binge here. Join the Conversation on social media using #DefineURadio and #AfterDarkConversations. Sidenote: The opinions of the host and guest are our own and are not in any way meant to offend or sway your own thoughts, research, or beliefs. Do your research and think for yourself. https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign (Support the show) (https://www.paypal.me/lifebydesign)
The conversation gets hot on this episode of After Dark, co-hosts Lyvonne and Shannon, join host Valencia to ring in the new year. Lyvonne shares how the loss of a family member taught her a valuable lesson that she needed to learn. Shannon took her lessons and applied it to leveling up on her finances. Valencia shares how she started growing tomatoes and it taught her valuable life lessons. We also realize that we were more prepared than we thought. The pandemic showed us that in order to grow, you must be buried. Join the conversation to hear how you can apply the lessons to have a better year. Key Topics and Things Mentioned: Learning what really mattered Dealing with things that fail expectations Being prepared for what's ahead How to go forward with the lessons learned
What did you learn in 2020?2020 was the year of revelation! It revealed the cracks in the system and in our lives (personally and professionally). In this episode, the host Valencia, breaks down the past lessons we should have learned and how to make...
Would you support another Black Panther movie?After the sudden and shocking death of Chadwick Boseman, some of us wonder is this the end of the Black Panther movies.  Even though Chadwick Boseman played other iconic characters such as Thurgood Marshall,...
What does the pandemic have to do with the surge in domestic violence?Being in a domestic violence situation is hard enough without the current state of events.  Now more than ever, victims are suffering.  We can blame the stay at home orders, the loss...
Are we born into sin?  What religion is right?  How much of the Bible is true?Is religion used to keep people in bondage? We touch on sin, different churches, the visions of Nat Turner and so much more.  This is Part 2 of a mini series on Religion vs...
Christian, Muslim, Atheist, Agnostic.....none of the above. Today people are running from the church and looking for the meaning to life in other ways.  Are they justified? Is religion a tool of oppression? Why do we believe what we believe?  In this...
Is cheating a reason to leave the relationship?  Who cheats more men or women? Is there ever "acceptable" cheating?With social media being a part of our everyday lives, cheating has gotten easier.  In this After Dark Conversation, host Valencia talks...
Are we surprised by the verdict in the Breonna Taylor case? Does our vote REALLY matter? Are well still in awe of Obama? In this After Dark Conversation, host Valencia discusses the verdict and payment in the Breonna Taylor case, the current political...
Does videos like WAP add to the oversexualization of black women? Why does strong equal masculine?  How can we build ourselves without relying on media to set the bar?In this After Dark Conversation, host Valencia talks to her friend Shannon Ward about...
How do you deal with racism without internalizing hate?  It is hard, but possible.In this After Dark Conversation, host Valencia talks to her friend counselor Donna Barnes a about a situation, dealing with racism and how not to go off but still be...
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