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Must-Knows Before You Die
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Must-Knows Before You Die

Author: Niya

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Stories and Lessons from this life. (and maybe some from the previous one.)

14 Episodes
In this episode, Niya reflects on a recent difficulty she experienced and what she learned from it. 
Hello my dears, Do you find relationships to be easy and peaceful experiences? Do you often end up resentful that your love was not reciprocated? or is your frustration more that people want more of you than you feel comfortable offering them?It turns out most of our impulses, needs and expectations are ingrained in our attachment system that we gained in our early life experiences.  That is what attachment theory is all about and is often not understood in all its nuance. It was formulated by psychologists John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth in the 1960s and has gained a lot of popularity and research interest till the present day. Remember, attachment style is an adaptive response and not a flaw. It is hard work to change your subconscious view of the world but possible and it's key to having healthier loving relationships. If you would like to do that work, the best way is probably to look for attachment informed therapists but I know that is not always accessible to everyone. And that's no problem because there are some great resources online. None of this is an AD by the way, it's just what I found most helpful for me. 1. Personal Development School by Thais Gibson 2. Podcast: Therapists Uncensored Podcast 3.  Book - Attached: The new science of adult attachment4. Heidi Priebe YT Channel: Heidi Priebe



Hello my dears,In this episode, we're going to spiral beyond time and space to figure out how we can be truly free, why that matters, if it does, and why we need it and we end at two painfully honest truths.  Enjoy!
Life is full of losses and heartbreak. How can we thrive because of what happened to us instead of letting it break us?In this highly vulnerable episode we'll discuss the complexity of loss and the people it turns us into. Then we end with a beautiful story you definitely should not miss. 
Vincent Van Gogh once wrote "I put my heart and my soul into my work, and lost my mind in the process."  He is not the only one who struggled with anxiety and depression in his short life. There is not enough space to name all the impressive artists who suffered unimaginably if not committed suicide.  Being a good artist requires an incredible amount "feeling" and focusing on expressing. But is there anyway to not be consumed in the world of dark emotions?
Today, we’re exploring the emotion we call guilt. And how it is leading us to doing worse not becoming a better person.All examples are fictional.Resources:Is corporal punishment an effective means of disciplineReduced Prefrontal Cortical Gray Matter Volume in Young Adults Exposed to Harsh Corporal PunishmentParental Conditional Regard: Psychological Costs and AntecedentsBooks on parenting with unconditional loveUnconditional Parenting by Alfie KohnOut of Control: Why Disciplining Your Child Doesn't Work and What Will: by Shefali Tsabary Ph.D.
Are you a good person?

Are you a good person?


What does it even mean to be a good person in this messy and complicated world we're living in? 
We all want to be happy.   But for people who value happiness a lot, we do tend to do a lot of things that make us unhappy. Especially when it comes to work. Only about half of the people in the US enjoy their jobs. Is there anything we can do about this? or is selling our soul for some coin our only option?   In this episode, we'll talk about how we can find work that we love and are engaged with and other factors that increase our quality of life.  Books mentioned: Finding Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi    Website
Have you ever been in situations where you can't comprehend how a person can believe things that seem so insane? Why are people that try to be good and moral divided by their beliefs?In this episode, Niya answers a call from her 50 years future self that is struggling to get a grasp of moral beliefs.*Some ideas in this episode are inspired by the book "The Righteous Mind" by Jonathan Haidt. A really good book full of thought-provoking ideas. Buy it here: Amazon*Website
It would be insane to think that any of us can always be perfectly rational. In fact most of the time we're influenced not by reason but by our environments and emotions.Other times, it's the world that has gone completely bonkers. And we, even if we know the truth, OUR truth, it can be incredibly hard to go against the wave because the definition of insane is someone who doesn't see reality like it's agreed upon by the majority.  In this episode, we'll discuss this phenomena from every angle. All the times the common belief has been wrong, and why we still hurry to silence people who disagree from the common belief, How art can be a safe place to be your unique self and more.Website 
What is Love really?  And how can we get more love in our lives?  In this episode, we'll explore how the ancients Greeks thought about love and what we can learn about this illusive but highly desired emotion.
Don't Be All Good

Don't Be All Good


Why do some of us find it so hard to say no? Or to ask for help? or Say what we really mean?Why do we keep on sabotaging our relationships and other good things in our lives? Psychologist Carl Jung first coined the term The Shadow Self. The parts of our personalities we deny and keep deep in our subconscious. In this Episode we talk about how we can identify our shadow selves, and what it really means to integrate it into our personalities, and what is the point really? How does this help us live our best lives?
We've all at one point or another had to introduce ourselves. We usually say our names, origins, Jobs. But who are we really more than the labels we are given from the external world? What does it really mean to know yourself? 



Life is short. The remedy to this is not fearing death or wishing to live forever. Instead using this short time deliciously and purposefully. Through this podcast, we'll explore all the ideas on how to live fully and what's important to each of us so that we can pursue the version of ourselves that's more authentic. 
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