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When I asked New Hampshire-ite Greg Gentry how he was doing, he simply put down his musket, looked in the camera and said, "live free or die!"________________________________________________________________________________________________Listen in on our conversation as we take a deep dive into that tenuous thing called identity and how searching for family impacts it. Along the way, we touch on Nietzsche, Alfred North Whitehead and taking long drives when discussions at home get a littl...
Season 2 of Secret Son keeps rolling along and, based on last week's number, people like hearing about identity!Secrecy is so last season. But not really. It's all a jumble, as we know. ________________________________________________________________________________________________Join show patron and fellow Midwesterner Bruce Porth and I as we discuss our young selves discovering Ayn Rand, the challenge for adoptees of the edict "just be yourself" and how searching for family altered ou...
After a winter hiatus, lots of St. John's Wort and extensive retooling, Secret Son returns for Season 2. ________________________________________________________________________________________________Join Ruth Monnig and I as we discuss growing up in the same Midwesterner town, searching for family and how searching altered our sense of identity._____________________________________________________________________________________________This podcast is for educational and entertainment purpo...
Anna Fienbork was adopted as an infant after five days at the hospital. The fact of being adopted was part of her life from early on. The emotional wounds of this early trauma of separation eventually lead her to doing emotional and spiritual work to face what felt like a black whole inside of her – the sense of having no roots, of somehow being utterly flawed. Her personal path has brought Anna to working with people, helping them to integrate their inner wounds, their lost inner children."R...
Join Shane Bouel and I as we delve into searching, societal resistance to our search and piecing together our new identity. ________________________________________________________________________________________________Shane Bouel, an Australian adoptee, is a compelling voice shedding light on the intricate journey of adoption. In his thought-provoking piece Understanding the Unseen Journey of Adoptees, he explores the three half-lives of adoption, delving into the complexities faced by adop...
On today's episode, Patricia Knight Meyer and I talk black market babies, the power of genetic mirroring and the magic of Glen Campbell. Join us!________________________________________________________________________________________________A baby-scoop era black-market "adoptee," Patricia was sold along a curb outside a Texas hospital and grew up with no legal identity, date of birth, legal adoption, or court appointed guardian. Thus, despite one shady attorney’s best laid plans, at 18 ...
Amy Lokken and I delve into the challenges of being a transracial Minnesota adoptee, the openness of 1970s hippies and the fiery spirit of Betty Jean Lifton. Join us!______________________________________________________________________________________________Amy Lokken is a biracial, transracial adoptee, born in the Upper Midwest in the mid-sixties. She currently lives in San Francisco. Amy is the author of two memoirs. The first, beloved i am, chronicles her life as an adoptee, ...
Join Emily and I as we discuss Paris, embracing the sublimity of a neurodivergent mind and fearfully admitting to others what they actually already know about us. _____________________________________________________________________________________Emily is a 40-year old domestic infant adoptee, born outside of Chicago, Illinois. Her roots are planted in Bismarck, North Dakota and other neighboring Badlands communities. Emily is an artist, writer and musician much like various m...
Emma Stevens and I discuss being the adoptee chameleon, secondary rejection and scanning strangers' faces wondering if they might be family. Join us! ___________________________________________________________________________Emma Stevens is a U.S. domestic adoptee from birth and has survived layers of trauma that have put her on multiple journeys. She developed the inner strength and courage to surmount the many struggles she faced. Her traumas were born from first being relin...
Searching and finding disrupts long-standing family dynamics. Jack Dermody and I delve into how newly arrived adoptees are like bombs thrown into a family and how the knowledge gained by searching offers us an invaluable new perspective on ourselves. Letting go of what could have been, Billie Eilish and even Lawrence Welk make an appearance. Wunnerful! ______________________________________________________________________________________Born in 1945, Jack Dermody is one o...
David Lynch's story and mine run rather parallel. BPD adoptive mother? Check. False leads in our father searches? Also check. Our Lady of Corporal Punishment primary school? Oh, yeah. Join David and I as we delve into these topics, Barbara De Angelis and much more! _______________________________________________________________________________________David Lynch is an adoptee who searched and found his birth mother in 1992-93. He is a writer, graphic designer, and musician who ...
From rural Chile to urban Sweden, Maria Diemar started life with a huge journey.Join Maria and I as we discuss kidnapping investigations, maddening bureaucratic red tape and '90s Nordic Neo-Nazis.Los Secretos are everywhere!_______________________________________________________________My name is Maria Diemar. I’m 47 years old, adopted, a teacher and mother of 3 boys. I was born in Chile then adopted in Sweden where I grew up but I currently live in Dallas/USA. In the last 12 years I have liv...
Dave Brown has his own Tales of the City. Join us for episode #11 of Secret Son as we discuss coming out in the 70s, implicit memory and meeting inebriated relatives for the first time. Thanks for listening!________________________________________________________________________________________I am a domestic adoptee born in Virginia, raised in San Diego, CA, and have lived in the San Francisco Bay Area most of my adult life. I have a Bachelor's in Business Management an...
Hey! Yeah, you! Why not join us for episode #10? Pamela Karanova is a force to be reckoned with in the adoptee community and has a new Substack you should definitely check out! Pamela and I discuss angelic librarians, going on the wagon and wild dogs deep in the Iowa countryside. And, of course, secrecy!_______________________________________________________________________________________Pamela A. Karanova is an adult adoptee from Iowa residing in Lexington, KY. She's the founder of Adoptees...
Oi mate, how you going? Join us for episode 8 as I chat with West Coast gal Vicky Graham in her new home in Oz. We investigate the Usual Suspects - romcom-ish reunions, local marsupials and surviving the Land of Misfit Toys. _________________________________________________ ____________________________________ “Mom and Dad adopted me when I was eight months old. Before then, I lived in the Crippled Children’s Home with the other unwanted babies, our own Island of Misfit ...
Sweet home Chicago! The Windy City plays a big part in Cammie Smith’s story. Join us for episode 7 as we get into how best to sneak into nursing homes, problematic Radio Shack ad campaigns and walking that fine line of being either too black or not black enough.And, as always - secrets!________________________________________________________________________________________"I'm a 33 years old TRA (transracial adoptee) and I was adopted at the age of five when my birth mother passed a...
Hey y'all - between us, some days I just wanna be sedated. This is not one of those days. In episode 6 of Secret Son, I head to the Deep South, set on the porch for a spell and have a leisurely tête-à-tête with Alicia Bratton. And, honey, let me tell you, we cover some stuff – progressive Alabama politics (no joke), bayou existentialism and the freedom that fifty brings. And, it goes without saying - secrets! Hey, ho, let’s go! _____________________________...
Hey all, did you know that the day destroys the night and night divides the day? Tune into episode 5 to hear author/writing coach Anne Heffron and I get psychedelic.We talk rocky reunions, wrestling with our demons and the psychological efficacy of binge eating. And, of course, breaking on through.____________________________________________________________________________________Anne Heffron is the author of You Don’t Look Adopted, Truth and Agency: Writing Ideas for Adopted People, and co-w...
Join Secret Son this week as we journey back to a time when it was morning in America.Reagan was president, the Eurythmics were tearing up the charts and the nation was falling in love with a precocious teenager named Michael J. Fox.Meanwhile, today’s guest and I were sitting next to each other in high school mulling over our own Family Ties.Liam Nitka and I were in the same high school class and had no idea the other was harboring their own shameful, dark secret – they were adopted. Good Lor...
I met therapist/adoptee advocate Joe Soll in the mid-90s in New York City. We'll discuss decades-long family searches, "spaciness" and getting fed up with living in secrecy. As we all slowly beat back the darkness and embrace much-needed longer days (I'm looking at you especially, Berlin), this is the perfect episode to shine some light on the adoptee perspective. Druids and pagans and normies - together, onward into the light! Music, as always, by the inimitable Cassis Bi...
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great episode. I always felt a bit guilty asking questions as I was told women were more commonly the ones who searched and had questions.
wow.. I ran away as a kid too. had the same thoughts.