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Even Me

Author: Dr. Cherlisa Jackson

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For people who want to know more about how their esteem impacts relationships and sexual decisions.
61 Episodes
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Send us a Text Message.Let's normalize that just because you CAN get married and have children does not mean that you need to! Your relationships and romantic connections need to be solid before adding the thought of permanency. Are you guilty of assuming they are The One just because they are "nicer" than your ex? If you are "dating to marry," do you habitually ask people if they can see a lifetime with you with limited information? Do you reveal your traumas immediately to test if they can ...
Send us a Text Message.What if I told you that you can "people-please" your inner critic by allowing you to project onto others unresolved feelings about yourself? Did you know that we begin embracing our inner critic in childhood by compartmentalizing our pain and then learning to repeat this pattern as adults to avoid confronting ourselves? What if you could discover the hidden parts of you that often produce guilt and shame and impact many of the decisions that you later regret? This episo...
Send us a Text Message.This episode is for you if you have scars or wounds from childhood that have been hard to release and impact things or people in your daily routine. This episode is also for you if you feel people owe you obedience in romantic relationships, and not getting your way results in emotional tantrums. Are you doing a good job protecting your inner child, letting them know you are a safe space to process and heal? Are you a good example to lead yourself through unexplored hea...
Send us a Text Message.Did you know that accountability and responsibility are not the same? One is a personal response to what happens, and the other is about task orientation. Because they are different, yet both equivalent to progress, avoiding or lacking either can cause devastating outcomes and create burnout. This episode is for you if it has been tough getting motivated or maintaining discipline, especially if you misunderstand (or are unsure about) your role in life or why you stack y...
Seeking Reciprocity?

Seeking Reciprocity?

2024-03-1444:05

Send us a Text Message.Receiving what we give is not the goal. This goal is positioning ourselves with people and things that can return what we provide equivalently. Every interaction has an opportunity to have your cup filled. Filling a void that is triggered by unmet needs and trauma is not the same as filling your cup. If you have started tolerating not having that cup filled, this episode is for you! If you continue to engage in romantic relationships, sexual activity, gender norms, pare...
Separation Anxiety?

Separation Anxiety?

2024-03-0701:03:12

Send us a Text Message.Do you feel safe in emotional connections? Have you been stuck at an age when you experienced the trauma of separation or abandonment? Are you codependent on familiarity? How do you prevent regret from turning into resentment without grieving what you cannot control? This episode is for you if you have ever identified with being codependent or have a loved one who you feel might struggle with codependent behaviors. This episode is also for you if your hyper-independence...
Send us a Text Message.This episode is for you if you are an overthinker. This episode is also for you if you allow scenarios outside of your control to live rent-free in your mind. The minute that wounds are identified, we have a responsibility to cleanse them and understand how to grieve without consistently compartmentalizing the hurt. If you are often trying to "pray it away" or hoping that time itself will help you forget about a wound that feels uncomfortable to address, this episode fo...
Send us a Text Message.Have you ever understood love bombing to be a form of anxiety? We most commonly understand this definition in conversations about narcissistic behaviors, yet the more we learn about our own relationship expectations, upbringing, and inability to be emotionally available, we may start to learn that the capacity to love bomb others is within us all. We often miss that grand gestures within days of meeting or a constant need to be in contact are both common gateways to lov...
Send us a Text Message.Have you ever noticed if you are more attracted to people who ignore you or blow hot and cold? Do you find yourself running to people, places, and things trying to get away from you, or avoiding love completely feeling that no one is trustworthy enough to receive your vulnerability? How do you respond when others put up boundaries around their time and require space to decompress and self-identify? This episode is for you if you sense that you have a type but your type ...
Send us a Text Message.Did you know that dimming your light is a form of people-pleasing? What if I told you that playing small is a way of telling yourself that external validation holds more power than your own objectivity about what you have been through? Today's episode is for you if you convince yourself that you are fraudulent in your achievements or if you feel guilty in consistently sharing them with others. Today's message is also for you if you need to unlearn the power others have ...
Send us a Text Message.What's your relationship with authority and structure? Do you gravitate toward chaos to maintain or regain a sense of control? Did you know that discipline is a form of rebellion and self-control? This episode is for you if you struggle with establishing discipline, maintaining motivation, or rebelling in scenarios where you do not get your way.
Send us a Text Message.Are you aware that you could be perpetuating your fear of failure or fear of success through Impostor Syndrome? What happens when you do not feel that you are enough and try that much harder to prove it to yourself just to stand in your way and prevent the best result? Are you picking specific people, places, and things that cannot elevate you just to prove the point that you can control external validation to make your fears more manageable that your goals are unattain...
Send us a Text Message.Men resist temptation too. Men are tired of the games too. Men want to be faithfully married too. Men are great parents too. Men want to cry too. Men can make love and be in love too. However, how many of us have shamed men for their decision to explore vulnerability and safety? How many of us lead with outdated social norms that create unrealistic expectations for men to deeply connect with others without first allowing them to access the tools to do so? Feelings and e...
Send us a Text Message.Whether on your favorite social platforms, dating someone new, conversing with someone familiar, or during conversations with strangers in your daily life, we have all been exposed to oversharing. How can we not be when it's normalized? Some might call "telling all" a method of release to help others understand they are not alone. Others might say sharing too much personal information could be a reaction to feeling misunderstood, unheard, or avoiding boundaries. This ep...
Send us a Text Message.Whether it's increased sadness around the holidays, or a dip in your mood from the colder months that lack sunshine, we have all experienced seasonal depression. We may more commonly understand it as winter or holidays blues, and it is more clinically known as Seasonal Affective Disorder if it becomes a routine occurrence. Not only does it impact mood and performance, it plays on the Vitamin D deficiency many of us experience, as well as the consistent drive to be produ...
Send us a Text Message.When you hear the word "breakup" does your brain typically associate romantic relationships? Friendship breakups happen so frequently and they can change your entire life. This episode is for you if you have ever ended a friendship, no matter how long you knew each other. It's also for you if you have trouble befriending new people, forming a friendship in romantic relationships, and even if you were in a relationship that had a friendship and it has been hard to releas...
Send us a Text Message.This episode is for you if you are still seeking closure about your ex or if you have yet to accept that things might not resume. Do you still want an apology or secretly want their next relationship to fail? Are you going back and forth with constantly repairing things without identifying changed behavior about what broke you up or caused the split?? Is continuing a sexual relationship making it hard to decide? Do you miss them or the familiarity? Tune in to today's ep...
Send us a Text Message.Turn on any social media platform or television show and it is filled with people discussing their frustrations with dating. Whether already in a romantic relationship or aiming for one, dating is a necessity throughout the entire commitment. This episode is for you if you are currently struggling to understand what dating is, how to navigate your expectations about it or need help restoring your faith in re-entering the dating scene.
Send us a Text Message.How often do you silence your opinions to be accepted or avoid conflict? How often do you misunderstand assertiveness as aggression? How frequently have you been told you're "too sensitive," so you hesitate to speak about your feelings? Have you ever feared conflict so much that you ghosted people, chose serious conversations via text, or resumed things after tension without seeking clarity about your thoughts? If you resonate with these questions, this episode is for y...
Send us a Text Message.What is a baseline behavior? We all have a starting point...a baseline of how we respond. It makes up the core of who we are: our true colors. We often love the representative because we often lead this way; we also fall in love with the potential of others and make them emotional projects. As is, we present what we want to be, but not always what we can maintain. We want people to know and understand versions of us we have yet to understand. How can someone love who yo...
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