Quality of Mind: Realising Exponential Potential.

This podcast series explores a game-changing understanding of the human mind that operates ‘Before Psychology’—the Secret Source that exponentially increases peace, performance and potential for any individual or organisation. In this episode, I’m joined by Nikki Langman, a professional speaker and emotional intelligence practitioner with 25 years’ experience in corporate HR and learning and development. We begin with the familiar response, “I’m fine”, and explore a question we rarely ask: who is the “I” whose experience we are trying to understand, improve or manage? Through creative projects, long-distance running and everyday decisions, we investigate the distinction between choosing happening and a separate self doing the choosing. The episode conversation brings us repeatedly back to a deeply familiar assumption: surely I can choose how I respond? Along the way, we explore flow, the conditioned “avatar”, aperture and the case of mistaken identity. Nikki shares what happens when the mental “tapes” stop playing during a run, and closes by reflecting on what it might mean to release the reins. Key Discussion Takeaways Looking before the content of “I’m fine” to the “I” itself. What our experiences of flow reveal about self-preoccupation. The difference between understanding an idea and investigating it directly. The assumption of a separate chooser. How aperture relates to creativity, resourcefulness and perceived possibilities. “Real but Never True”: why felt experience can be compelling without being what it appears. Recognising our mental tapes, including the persistent story of a self in charge. Neutral noticing and the possibility of releasing the need to control. Key Chapters include: 06:23 — Starting with the “I”: identity, the avatar and flow 15:54 — Who are you beyond your descriptions? 25:37 — Choosing happening—but can we find a chooser? 37:47 — Can a thought have its own thoughts? 40:45 — Aperture and the case of mistaken identity 49:44 — “But I can choose how I respond” 56:03 — Activity rather than entity; Real but Never True 1:03:19 — Choice, decisions and obviousness 1:08:43 — Running beyond the mental tapes 1:14:34 — Defensive certainty versus clear assertiveness 1:19:10 — Neutral noticing   Curious? Want to know more? If you want to know more about Nikki, you can find her profile here and connect to her newsletter here  Explore all things Quality of Mind Take the 3-Minute Quality of Mind Quiz Audio Intro Short Course — a free six-part introduction. Introduction to Quality of Mind e-book YouTube Explainer: What is Before Psychology? Watch past clients describe their experience of Quality of Mind Follow Piers Thurston on LinkedIn Subscribe to the Quality of Mind YouTube channel TASTE THE MANGO — YouTube — all about Direct Inquiry. Explore for yourself. Enjoyed the episode? Please follow, share and leave a review. It helps more people discover Quality of Mind and explore what might be available before the familiar work of managing themselv

This podcast series explores a game-changing understanding of the human mind that operates ''Before Psychology''- the Secret Source' that exponentially increases the peace, performance, and potential for any individual or organisation. What if the 'me' trying to access flow and presence is itself the misunderstanding?   In this episode, Piers continues his conversation with Deborah Hurwitz, host of the Productivity for Perfectionists Summit® After their first conversation opened up powerful questions around procrastination, perfectionism, flow and the deeper nature of mind, they recorded a further conversation to explore the central question underneath everything:  Who, or what, is really in charge? Deborah begins with a distinction familiar to many high achievers, creatives and perfectionists: the difference between flow and presence. Flow can seem like the state where the self disappears and life simply moves. Presence can seem like something more deliberate: the self stepping back, observing, witnessing, noticing and trying to become more grounded. But as the conversation unfolds, that distinction begins to loosen.Piers invites Deborah into a direct inquiry into the nature of self, attention, body, sensation, perception and awareness. Rather than trying to understand consciousness as a concept, they look directly at what is available in experience. Where is the “me” that owns attention? Where is the personal, localised consciousness that seems to be “in here”? Do we actually experience the body directly, or only through thought, sensation and perception? And is the body the container of consciousness, or does the body appear within consciousness? The key distinction that emerges is this: The body-mind is not an entity that has consciousness. It is an activity of consciousness. This begins to shift Deborah’s understanding of presence. Presence is no longer another job for the self to perform. It is not the perfectionist self becoming a better observer. It is not “Deborah” taking responsibility for witnessing experience more skilfully. Instead, presence begins to look more like coming home. By the end of the episode, Deborah sees that even the role of “observer” can become another subtle responsibility for the self. And then something lands: What if presence is not “I am observing”? What if even the responsibility of being the observer can be released? This is not a tidy teaching. It is a live inquiry. A conversation about flow, presence, consciousness, identity, responsibility and the case of mistaken identity. And it points to the the heart of Quality of Mind: Undoing The Case of Mistaken Identity  The one trying to be in charge may be part of the very misunderstanding we are looking through. Highlights 02:05 — Deborah’s hunger for a different conversation Deborah describes why the first episode went somewhere different from conventional psychology, trauma, patterning or behavioural approaches. 05:28 — Flow versus presence Deborah names the distinction she wants to explore: flow as an unselfconscious state, and presence as being aware of being here, now. 09:19 — Where do you think you are? Piers asks the question that shifts the episode: in either flow or presence, where does Deborah think she is? 09:48 — The location of consciousness Deborah names the question she had almost brought into the conversation: what is the location of consciousness? 11:34 — Entering direct inquiry Piers invites Deborah to look directly, in real time, without relying on concepts, models or inherited ideas. 15:36 — “My attention” Deborah notices that attention moves, but still feels like “my attention”. Piers explores how the “my” is created. 16:43 — Can you find the “my” entity? The inquiry turns towards whether the separate owner of attention can actually be found before thought, sensation and perception. 21:24 — How do you know you have a body? Piers brings the inquiry into the body, asking how the body is known in direct experience. 25:36 — The body appears in consciousness A key pointer: the body may not have consciousness inside it. The body may appear in consciousness. 28:13 — The missing piano and the collapse of orientation Deborah shares an experience from music production where a missing piano part briefly removed her usual sense of labelling, positioning and organisation. 31:21 — No labelling, no positioning, no identification Deborah sees how, in that moment, there was experience before the usual “me” had decided what it was. 34:34 — What comes and goes? Piers points to how thoughts, sensations, perceptions and even the idea of “me” come and go within experience. 37:29 — Which “I” are we talking about? The conversation distinguishes between the personal self and the deeper “I” of consciousness itself. 38:06 — Water and whirlpools Piers introduces the metaphor of consciousness as water and the body-mind as a whirlpool. 39:54 — Activity, not entity The central insight: localised consciousness is not a separate entity. The body-mind is an activity of consciousness. 40:09 — A significant distinction Deborah recognises that “activity, not entity” changes something important. 43:09 — Whirlpools are not separate from water The metaphor lands more clearly: the body-mind is not separate from consciousness, just as a whirlpool is not separate from water. 44:21 — The continuity of “me” Deborah asks what explains the felt continuity of herself from childhood to now. Piers suggests that the continuity we sense may not be the continuity of the body-mind, but the continuity of consciousness itself. 46:33 — A consoling realisation Deborah says this is a new for her, and that she finds it consoling. 47:10 — Freedom from fixing the self Deborah begins to see that she may not need to be saddled with fixing, improving, reaching for authenticity or achieving wholeness at the level of the self. 49:39 — Psychological freedom from being the driver Piers points to the freedom that comes from not needing to be the body-mind self pushing and managing everything. 50:06 — Real but never true They return to the Quality of Mind phrase “real and never true”: experience is vivid, felt and alive, but not ultimately true in the way it appears. 50:33 — The sky is not damaged by the storm Piers uses the sky and screen metaphors to point to what remains untouched by the changing weather of experience. 51:27 — Undoing the flow/presence distinction Deborah brings the episode back to its original question: can the distinction between flow and presence now be seen differently? 52:12 — The observer as another responsibility Deborah sees that her old understanding of presence still put the self in charge as the observer. 53:24 — Releasing even the observer Deborah asks what happens if even the responsibility of being the observer is released. The episode lands in Deborah’s insight: presence may be less about doing and more about coming home. 56:18 — Aperture, expansion and contraction Piers connects the metaphor to aperture: when consciousness is contracted, separation feels real; when expanded, the separate doer is less obvious. This episode explores Why flow and presence can look like two different states How the self can subtly try to manage both flow and presence What direct inquiry is, and why it differs from conceptual understanding The assumption that there is a “me” who owns attention How thought, sensation and perception create the appearance of “my body” Why the body may appear in consciousness rather than consciousness living inside the body The difference between the body-mind as an entity and the body-mind as an activity The water and whirlpool metaphor for individuality and consciousness Why the sense of continuity from childhood to adulthood may not be what we think it is How the observer role can become another subtle form of self-identification Why coming home may be closer than trying to become present What this means for perfectionism, self-improvement, creativity and responsibility Why this matters Many thoughtful, driven people spend enormous energy trying to improve themselves. They try to manage thoughts, regulate the nervous system, access flow, practise presence, become authentic, overcome limiting beliefs and find the right inner state. Some of that may be useful. But this episode points somewhere more upstream. What if the self trying to do all of that is not what we fundamentally are? What if the one trying to manage experience is itself part of the psychological activity? What if peace, flow and presence are not produced by the self, but become more obvious when the self is seen differently? This does not mean life stops happening. Creativity continues. Responsibility continues. Action continues. The form still functions. But the body-mind no longer has to carry the impossible burden of being what we are. Resources & links  Their first conversation  The Hidden Cause of Procrastination — It’s Not ''What'' You Think Deborah helps smart, thoughtful perfectionists get unstuck, move towards what matters, and relate differently to the pressure, overthinking and exhaustion that can come with high standards. https://cobaltcoaching.com/ Explore The Telepathy Tapes, mentioned briefly in this episode,  It is included here as a pointer to curiosity about consciousness, https://thetelepathytapes.com/ Explore all things Quality of Mind: https://www.qualityofmind.biz/ 3-Minute Quality of Mind Quiz Discover how much your understanding of the mind may already be shaping your performance, peace and potential.  https://piers-xruoj0sz.scoreapp.com/  Audio Intro Short Course A short introduction to the understanding behind Before Psychology. https://qualityofmind.online/courses/qomaudiointrocourse/ YouTube Explainer — What is Before Psychology? A clear short introduction to why Quality of Mind points before conventional psychology. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y99iy9yiCeM Watch past clients talk about the power of Quality of Mind: https://qu

From the QUALITY OF MIND Podcast Part of the ‘Not Even 5 Mins Series’ (Ep24) Part of the Not Even 5 Mins Series In this short Quality of Mind snippet, we explore why seeing through self-identification matters. The central misunderstanding is that we take ourselves to be a separate self. A person who has to be improved, protected, managed, fixed, developed and proven. But what if that “self” is not what we fundamentally are? When we believe we are this separate self, life can become a constant project of identity-management. We try to control, upgrade and succeed as something that may not actually be solid in the first place. That can create enormous stress and psychological pressure. Quality of Mind points to the possibility of seeing through this Case of Mistaken Identity. As that becomes clearer, something relaxes. The fight with reality softens. The pressure to manage the “me” eases. More peace, clarity, resilience, creativity and possibility become available. This is not just relevant when life feels difficult. It is also relevant when life is already going well. Because seeing through self-identification can support the shift from striving to thriving. Curious? Want to know more? Explore the full conversation with Katijn, where we go deeper into seeing no self, Direct Inquiry, the Case of Mistaken Identity, and the freedom that becomes available when self-identification begins to loosen.  Full episode Here: Explore all things Quality of Mind: www.qualityofmind.biz 3-Minute Quality of Mind Quiz: Discover how much your understanding of the mind may already be shaping your performance, peace and potential.

From the QUALITY OF MIND Podcast Part of our 'Not Even 5 Mins Series' Snippet Episode 32: Comfort is Quietly Killing Us | Why Real Freedom Isn’t What You Think In this excerpt from the Quality of Mind: Transforming Business podcast, we explore a powerful illusion that underpins much of modern life: the pursuit of comfort as a path to freedom. From coping in the workplace to chasing emotional ease, we innocently limit our lives to what feels “safe” or “manageable.” But true freedom isn’t found in avoiding discomfort—it’s found in being free with it. Discover why the pursuit of comfort often contracts our experience rather than expands it, and how real liberation lies in seeing beyond the pedestal we’ve put feelings on.   00:21 The Illusion of Comfort 00:37 True Freedom Defined 01:05 The Trap of Seeking Comfort 02:06 Workplace Realities and Coping 03:03 Embracing Discomfort for Growth

From the QUALITY OF MIND Podcast Part of the ‘Not Even 5 Mins Series’ (Ep22) In this short Quality of Mind snippet, we explore one of the most provocative implications of the Quality of Mind understanding: there is choosing, but no separate chooser ie. we don't have a separate free word or agency.  It can look obvious that “I” am the one making choices. I decide. I think. I act. I control. I make things happen. But when we slow down and look more carefully, something interesting begins to reveal itself. There is thinking going on. There is choosing going on. There is doing going on. But can we actually find a separate thinker, chooser or doer behind it all? In this snippet, Piers points to the difference between turning Quality of Mind into another technique, compared to noticing what is already happening before the mind turns it into a personal task. The usual assumption is that there is a separate body-mind “me” with agency and control over thoughts, actions, behaviours and outcomes. That assumption is so familiar that we rarely question it. But but when we look at it differently directly, the picture looks different. Thoughts arise. Actions happen. The body moves. Words come. Decisions appear. And then the mind often claims ownership afterwards. “I did that.” “I chose that.” “I thought that.” Quality of Mind invites us to look directly at this. Where did the thought actually come from? Did “you” choose the thought before it appeared? Or did the thought simply appear, with the idea of “me thinking it” arriving as another thought? This is the simple but powerful distinction: There is choosing, but no chooser. There is thinking, but no thinker. There is doing, but no separate doer. This is not about becoming passive, fatalistic or detached from life. Life clearly continues. Choices still appear. Action still happens. Planning still happens. Responsibility still has practical meaning. But the pressure of the separate “me” trying to control the whole system can begin to loosen. And that matters. Because so much of our stress, striving and overthinking comes from the assumption that there is a separate self inside the system who must get the right thoughts, make the right choices and control the right outcomes in order to be okay. When that assumption softens, flow often becomes more available. Not because we have learned a better way to control life. But because we have begun to see that life was never being run by a separate controller in the first place. Curious? Want to know more? This is a short extract from a longer conversation with fellow coach Deborah, where we explore Quality of Mind, flow, self-identification, the illusion of free will, and what it means to notice life happening before the idea of a separate “me” takes ownership. Full episode: Here Follow-up resources: Explore all things Quality of Mind: https://www.qualityofmind.biz/ 3-Minute Quality of Mind Quiz: Discover how much your understanding of the mind may already be shaping your performance, peace and potential: https://www.qualityofmind.biz/quiz/ Audio Intro Short Course: A short introduction to the understanding behind Before Psychology: https://qualityofmind.online/courses/qomaudiointrocourse/ Video: Why Do We Describe Quality of Mind as Before Psychology? — clear short intro: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y99iy9yiCeM Watch past clients talk about the power of Quality of Mind: https://qualityofmind.biz/real-results/  Follow Piers on LinkedIn for regular posts and reflections: https://uk.linkedin.com/in/piersthurston Subscribe to our YouTube channel for quick, powerful insight videos: https://www.youtube.com/c/qualityofmind For a more in-depth look into the Before Psychology nondual understanding behind Quality of Mind, explore here: TASTE THE MANGO — YouTube and Substack all about Direct Inquiry. Explore for yourself: https://tastethemango1.substack.com/