Therapists' Take with Carrie and Josh

Is my partner a narcissist? Or are we using a clinical diagnosis to describe something much more complicated?The word narcissist has become a common fixture in conversations about relationships, conflict, addiction, and emotional abuse. But what does narcissism actually mean? And how do we distinguish between narcissistic tendencies, unhealthy relationship patterns, and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)?In this episode of Therapists’ Take Podcast, Josh Nichols and Carrie Kyger are joined by Xander for an engaging, insightful, and occasionally humorous conversation about one of the most frequently misunderstood terms in mental health.Together, they explore the origins of narcissism, the diagnostic criteria for NPD, the influence of childhood experiences and parenting, and the ways narcissistic traits can affect intimate relationships.Most importantly, they challenge the idea that we must assign someone a clinical label before acknowledging that their behavior is hurtful, unhealthy, or even abusive.The takeaway: You don't have to prove that someone is a narcissist to recognize that something in your relationship needs to change.________________00:00 – Hi, Carrie! Introduction: Is My Partner a Narcissist?03:08 – Why Everyone Is Talking About Narcissism04:02 – When Labels Oversimplify Relationship Problems06:45 – The Greek Mythology Behind Narcissism08:20 – Narcissism vs. Narcissistic Personality Disorder10:14 – Understanding Personality Disorders13:30 – Childhood Experiences and Parental Overvaluation16:12 – John Bradshaw, Validation, and Healthy Self-Worth19:10 – The Nine Diagnostic Criteria for NPD22:12 – Narcissistic Traits vs. a Clinical Diagnosis24:38 – Healthy Narcissism in Childhood Development27:08 – Why Your Relationship Doesn't Need a Diagnosis28:22 – Narcissism, Empathy, and Emotional Disconnection30:26 – Recognizing Harmful and Abusive Relationship Patterns32:05 – Am I a Narcissist? Self-Reflection and Accountability33:45 – Addiction, Betrayal Trauma, and Narcissistic Behaviors36:50 – Why Narcissism Can Be Difficult to Diagnose38:38 – Malcolm Gladwell and the Value of Difficult Personalities39:51 – Key Takeaways: Curiosity, Confidence, and Nuance40:34 – Rapid-Fire Game: Therapists Off the Clock48:09 – Closing Thoughts and How to Support the Podcast_____________________The following resources were specifically mentioned or discussed:David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants — Malcolm GladwellHealing the Shame That Binds You — John BradshawThe Greek Myth of Narcissus and EchoAs Amazon Affiliates, we do earn on qualified purchases._______________Watch and connect with us:YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/recoverytv4uFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/familysolutionsokLinkTree: https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok Family Solutions Counseling: https://familysolutionsok.comRemember: You don't need a diagnosis to validate your experience, establish healthy boundaries, or seek support.Therapists' Take Podcast — Bringing a therapist's perspective to everyday conversations about life, relationships, and mental health.

Therapists’ Take on Finding the Right TherapistWith Special Guest Melissa Oliver, LMFT | Co-Founder of Stillwater Counseling CenterFinding the right therapist can be overwhelming. Between confusing credentials, different specialties, insurance coverage, scheduling conflicts, and the challenge of finding someone you genuinely connect with, knowing where to begin isn’t always easy.And here’s something that might surprise you: even therapists struggle to find the right therapist!In this episode of Therapists’ Take, hosts Joshua Nichols, LMFT, and Carrie Kyger, LMFT, welcome special guest Melissa Oliver, LMFT, co-founder of Stillwater Counseling Center, for a practical and candid conversation about navigating the process of choosing a mental health professional.Drawing from their experiences as clinicians, practice owners, and therapy clients themselves, Josh, Carrie, and Melissa unpack the many factors that influence finding the right therapeutic fit.__________________________ 00:00 – Introduction: How to Pick Your Therapist01:54 – Meet Melissa Oliver, LMFT06:39 – The Story Behind Stillwater Counseling Center09:08 – Why Finding a Therapist Can Be So Difficult11:42 – Even Therapists Struggle to Find Therapists17:23 – Licensed Therapists, Candidates, and Clinical Interns23:57 – Understanding Different Therapist Licenses25:00 – LPC vs. LMFT: What's the Difference?33:47 – Specialized Licenses and Professional Credentials36:53 – Finding a Therapist with the Right Specialty38:52 – Should You Request a Consultation?41:20 – Insurance, Scheduling, Cost, and Accessibility45:07 – A Practical Checklist for Choosing a Therapist48:09 – When It's Time to Try a Different Therapist49:08 – Resources, Final Thoughts, and Closing_____________Resources & Helpful LinksPsychology Today – Find a Therapist — Search for therapists by location, specialty, insurance, and other Recommended ReadingMaybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb Counseling Practices Featured in This EpisodeStillwater Counseling Center — Co-founded by our guest Melissa Oliver, LMFT, and Lauren Nahara, LMFT. Serving individuals, couples, and families in Stillwater, Oklahoma.Family Solutions Counseling — Counseling services for individuals, couples, and families in the Oklahoma City area._______________About Our Guest: Melissa Oliver, LMFTMelissa Oliver, LMFT, is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and co-founder of Stillwater Counseling Center in Stillwater, Oklahoma.Melissa graduated from Oklahoma State University’s Marriage and Family Therapy program in 2011. Her clinical background includes working in community mental health in rural Oklahoma and serving individuals and families through Wings of Hope, a domestic violence agency in Stillwater. These experiences continue to shape her approach to clinical care and her understanding of the importance of accessible, quality mental health services.In 2019, Melissa co-founded Stillwater Counseling Center alongside fellow LMFT Lauren Nahara. What began as a small private practice has grown into a multidisciplinary counseling center with approximately 15 therapists serving individuals, couples, and families throughout Stillwater and surrounding communities.Melissa brings both professional expertise and personal perspective to this conversation, sharing her own experience navigating the surprisingly complicated process of finding a therapist—even as a mental health professional herself.

Where does faith end and therapy begin? And what happens when the two work together?In this episode of Therapists' Take, licensed marriage and family therapists Josh Nichols and Carrie Kiger welcome Dr. Jim Baird, longtime minister and professor of philosophy and religion at Oklahoma Christian University, for a thoughtful conversation about faith, mental health, suffering, and the responsibility of caring for others.Together, we explore the similarities and differences between pastoral care and professional counseling, the importance of recognizing our limitations, and why not every struggle can—or should—be solved with a quick answer.We also discuss the role of suffering in the human experience, the emotional demands placed on those who help others, and the importance of collaboration between mental health professionals and spiritual leaders, particularly when navigating addiction, betrayal trauma, and relationship recovery.Whether you're a therapist, minister, person of faith, or simply someone trying to make sense of life's more difficult experiences, this conversation offers perspectives worth considering.Join the conversation! What role do you believe faith and professional therapy should play in emotional healing?👍 Like this episode💬 Share your thoughts in the comments🔔 Subscribe to Therapists' Take for more conversations about mental health, relationships, and the human experience.Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational and informational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized mental health treatment.____________________00:00 - Welcome to Therapists' Take03:00 - Meet Dr. Jim Baird10:00 - The Changing Relationship Between Ministry and Mental Health15:00 - Pastoral Counseling vs. Professional Therapy23:30 - Recognizing Our Limitations as Helpers31:30 - Understanding Pain, Suffering, and Healing43:30 - Faith, Addiction, and Betrayal Trauma Recovery49:00 - Finding Connection and Meaning Through Difficult Experiences 

In this episode of Therapist Take Podcast, we welcome back licensed therapist Kristen Callaway for a practical, down-to-earth conversation on mindfulness….without the eye rolls.Together, we unpack what mindfulness actually is (hint: it’s not just meditation), why it can feel uncomfortable or even threatening, and how it connects to your nervous system and trauma responses. Kristen shares how mindfulness helps you move from reacting to responding, and offers simple, real-life tools you can use in moments of stress—whether you're stuck in traffic, overwhelmed at home, or navigating anxiety.We also explore how building awareness can help you better understand what you truly need, break cycles of avoidance, and grow confidence in handling difficult emotions.If mindfulness has ever felt inaccessible, unrealistic, or just not “your thing,” this episode reframes it into something practical, flexible, and deeply human._____________________00:00 – Introduction & welcome01:16 – Introducing Kristen Callaway03:13 – Why mindfulness (and why people resist it)04:30 – Mindfulness vs. meditation07:04 – What mindfulness actually is (simple definition)09:11 – Why mindfulness is hard (especially for avoiders)10:06 – Trauma and discomfort with awareness12:02 – Everyday disconnection from internal signals13:02 – The nervous system & polyvagal theory explained14:33 – Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses16:23 – Reacting vs. responding to perceived threats19:36 – Mindfulness as acceptance (not avoidance)20:18 – Practical tools: naming, distancing, and breathing21:46 – How to regulate your nervous system in real time22:00 – Asking: “What do I need right now?”24:27 – Panic attacks, breathing, and sensory grounding26:33 – Awareness → identifying needs27:13 – Meeting basic and emotional needs28:50 – Real-life example: anxiety while driving31:10 – Emotional release & the “cry song” concept33:28 – Human discomfort & avoidance patterns35:12 – Thera-Sense Game41:35 – Closing thoughts & where to find Kristen__________________Resources from this Episode:Note: As Amazon Associates, we earn on qualifying purchases.Polyvagal Theory (Stephen Porges) – Understanding how the nervous system detects and responds to threat - https://amzn.to/4cESDISBreathing – Techniques to activate the parasympathetic nervous system - https://amzn.to/4tcZX5iFeelings Wheel – Tool for identifying emotions - - https://amzn.to/41BqoWjEMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) – Trauma-focused therapy approach - https://amzn.to/4vz721A“How to Keep House While Drowning” (book) – Mentioned in relation to Kristen’s podcast series - https://amzn.to/3QfG13m_________________ABOUT OUR GUEST: Kristen Callaway is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and the owner of Seeking Peace Counseling. She is EMDR-certified and an Oklahoma-approved licensed supervisor, with additional certification as a first responder counselor.Kristen specializes in working with adults navigating trauma, anxiety, and grief, with a particular focus on military service members and first responders. Her approach integrates nervous system awareness, mindfulness, and trauma-informed care to help clients build resilience and healing.She is also the host of the podcast Let’s Sit With This, where she shares grounding tools, encouragement, and honest conversations about life’s challenges.Outside of her clinical work, Kristen enjoys running (including half marathons), baking, and spending time with her husband—a military veteran and law enforcement officer—and their two children.Connect with Kristen:Website: seekingpeace.comPodcast: Let’s Sit With This - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lets-sit-with-this/id1818168015_______________For more great content, please check out our LinkTree at https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsokSocial: Seeking Peace Counseling (Facebook & Instagram)

Why do some films leave us speechless, stirred, or suddenly more aware of our own lives? In this episode of Therapists’ Take, we sit down with actor, producer, and screenwriter Erin Elizabeth Cook, whose current film in production features Martin Sheen. Together, we explore how storytelling onscreen doesn’t just entertain, it evokes emotion, builds empathy, and influences how we understand ourselves and others.From a clinical lens, we examine the psychological mechanisms that make movies powerful tools for emotionalprocessing and identity formation. From Erin’s perspective inside the industry, we unpack how characters are developed, how emotional arcs are crafted, and what it takes to portray vulnerability in a way that feels authentic rather than performative. This conversation bridges the therapeutic and the cinematic, revealing how the stories we watch often echo the stories we’re living.__________________00:00 - Hi, Carrie!08:20 - The One Film12:59 - Martin Sheen16:48 - Character Development23:25 - A Larger Purpose - Posttraumatic Growth27:10 - Writing Our Own Story43:50 - Telling Your Story44:15 - Self-Awareness & Method Acting54:25 - Mental Health Attunement on Set01:05:00 - Information for "The One" Movie____________About the Author: Erin Elizabeth CookProducer/Screenwriter/Actor-Erin Elizabeth Cook started training for her career in Theatre, Television, and Film at the age of twelve. She has appeared on various TV Shows, Theatrical Productions, Commercials, and Films across the United States including Texas, California, Oregon and Oklahoma, both in front and behind the camera. After making the decision to leave LA and taking a long personal hiatus, Erin re-launched her career in her home state in 2014. Since then, she has had over 30 speaking roles in various Films including "Awake", "If Looks Could Kill", and "The Unbreakable Boy". Erin is also an Award Winning Screenwriter and Producer. Having interned directly under a Producer on over 20 sets in LA and at home, she recently set out to produce her own content. She has won over 30 Awards for her Screenplay "The TentVille Knights" including The Golden Pen Screenwriter of the Year Award in 2023. "Chasing Shadows", a short film that she Produced, wrote, and starred in, had it's Hollywood World Premiere at the Beverly Hills Film Festival at the TCL Chinese Theaters in 2024. During that time, she was also deep into development for her first Feature Film which she wrote, produced, and co-starred in. "The One", starring Martin Sheen, Jana Kramer, Nick Zano, Olivia Sanabia, and Noah Redclay was filmed entirely in Oklahoma thanks to incentives and the Filmed in Oklahoma Act and features new songs from "We The Kings" and "The Imaginaries".While awaiting a late 2026 release, she is in development on another Feature film and an Episodic. She just completed her fourth Feature Screenplay, "Second Shift". When she's not working, she loves spending time with her furry children, helping other pets find their forever homes, and advocating for PTSD and mental health awareness.Connect with Erin on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/erinelizabethcookofficial_________________Information on "The One" MovieInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/theonefeaturefilmFacebook : https://www.facebook.com/theone-movieFacades Short Film: https://youtu.be/i3V4y2ksRq0?si=fOwayjcy36STLhtu______________________Please check us out on our linktree for more great content: https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok