Stepping In with Kara

Series Description (4 Parts):  Mine may be the most challenging story for me to hold space for… and yet in this 4 part episode series, I invite you into conversations with a few of the people who have been most present with me on my journey following a near death bicycle accident in May of 2018 that left me with a very broken body and a brain injury. For 6 years, the primary focus of my life has been healing, restoring and figuring out how to live in the now, AS IS. My own journey is very much the inspiration for launching this podcast as I deeply believe that being held and witnessed in our life stories is an important part of healing. It is why I step in with you and this time, I invite you to step in with me. Episode Description: In this episode, I am sharing a conversation with my son, Coleman. He is the only person who has been part of the day to day in the last 6 years. His adolescence into young adulthood has been marked by this journey and he is the reason I have been able to keep going through some of the darkest and most confusing stretches. He is my MVP, my little buddy and my lifelong friend. His perspective is so valuable to me and I know you will be amazed at his endurance as the only child of a single woman who faced death and has had to rebuild from the ground up. That is a lot to carry when you are 12. Though it pains me to know some of the things he took on under our circumstances (don’t we all want the easy road for our kids!?) I am also beyond proud of the way he has risen to be the brilliant and beautiful young man that he is in these times of turbulence and uncertainty. I hope you enjoy this candid conversation between a boy and his momma… reflecting on our journey as it relates to my accident, subsequent brain injury and how it affected him and our family as a unit.  Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with Lynette Molina, a woman whose gratitude and joy for life have literally saved her life. The two are talking about the very unexpected, recent loss of Lynette’s little sister. She shares her journey of grief and her gratitude for having loved another so deeply. Because of her childhood trauma which has wiped away many memories, losing her sister was like losing part of her memory. She was the one person who knew Lynette’s entire life journey, as they walked it together. From homeless in LA to PTA member in her daughter’s private school in Scottsdale, AZ Lynette has a great appreciation for every blessing in her life. To this day, every time Lynette leaves the grocery store, she sits in her car and cries because she is so grateful that she can buy anything she wants. Listen in for jewels of wisdom from a woman who has cultivated healing through gratitude in her defining moments, especially when life is hard. Highlights: If you love someone you will be in a grief season. We will all lose someone we love. The shock of losing someone unexpectedly Talking to my sister and feeling her presence Losing the only one who really knew me. Lynette shared the powerful story of when she realized she was not the only one hiding trauma. She didn’t have to keep it a secret. She could take off the mask. Move from wearing a mask because that is what you think you have to do to living authentically because that actually helps others heal. People want to see who you really are. Sharing your story can actually help other people. The contrast of growing up homeless in LA, experiencing a very traumatic childhood to raising their children in Scottsdale, Arizona, which is very fancy and high end. Somatic healing of trauma. Mind body connection Lynette encourages us to listen. Pay attention so you know how to support people.  Pick up the phone. People need to hear your heart. Being grateful doesn’t minimize the hard things you are going through. It is meant to balance them out and keep you in the game. Quotes: “Sometimes death is a defining moment in our life” “(Grief is) part of life… we're all going to experience it. It's a blessing If you love someone enough that you lose them and you're grieving.”  “We are not meant to go this alone.” “So it's like, no matter how sad, mad, whatever is just wrecking you when you say, Yeah, but I'm grateful. I just saw the sunrise… I mean, we were homeless. I was grateful my mom had a station wagon. Now we could all four sit in the back, lay in the back and sleep.” Connect with Lynette: Facebook: www.Facebook.com/lynettejmolina “I’m a wife, mom, a Grammy, a friend, a survivor & a lifetime healer of my soul! I’m a city girl living my dream in the desert with dogs & donkeys! I had a very traumatic childhood & I have spent my entire life healing and helping others heal too. Life is hard and beautiful! Gratitude is my secret weapon!” Resources: Book: The Body Keeps the Score - by Besser van der Kolk M.D. Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/happyhealthymamastribe Lynette’s Top 10 Life Changing Books: The Four Agreements  The Magic by Rhonda Byrne - 30 day Gratitude Challenge (1 per year) Journey to the Heart The Healing Season The Miracle Morning The Body Keeps Score Every Moment Holy Mending the Soul Vibrate Higher Daily Daily Word (a Unity Publication) Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with Courage Coach and riveting story teller, Britt Ivy to talk about her very tender experience of having an abortion. Their conversation is not about whether it is right or wrong. It is not a political conversation. It is the story of an 18-year-old Britt who made the choice to have an abortion and later in life unpacked the many ways in which it showed up as self-sabotaging behavior, eating disorder, patterns of choosing abusing partners, numbing her feelings, and addiction until she found help, hope and healing years later. It is her life’s work to help other women heal. Highlights: Post Abortion Syndrome (PAS) is like PTSD for abortion. It shows up years and decades later. It is important to take away the religious and political charge and just talk about the experience it is for a woman to have an abortion. Men are taught to respectfully allow the woman to make a decision. For Britt, when her boyfriend was supportive in that way, it made it feel like the decision went from “ours” to “hers”. She highlights the need for the conversation between the man and woman… sharing the burden of decision. Panic took over. Fear of judgement, disapproval, the end of freedom. A moment of tears and peace as Britt speaks to her younger self: “I love you. You’re mine. Let’s take this journey together. There are no accidents. This life is ours. You are forgiven. You are loved.” People don’t put it together that the life symptoms connect to having the abortion. Quotes: “The world tells you there is no problem… I’m here to tell you there is.” “I am not here for a religious or political debate. I’m here for the wounded.” Connect with Britt: Website: brittivy.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/britt-ivy-speaker Founder of Heartlife Foundation, Britt Ivy, “The Courage Coach”, empowers women who have ended a pregnancy to bravely live with hope and purpose. As an Award-Winning Television Talk Show Host, speaker and philanthropist, Britt’s passionate faith propels women in transforming broken pasts into thriving futures. PATH2Thrive Course - Mission Statement - "I empower Christian heart-centered loving women of faith who have begun their post-abortion healing journey to overcome self defeating thoughts, patterns, and behaviors so they can thrive in a more confident, satisfying, peace filled life and be a blessing to those around them." Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with sought after motivational speaker and international teacher, Nyke Latrice.  Kara and Nyke talk about her single mom life, providing for her 3 kids (2 of her own and an added nephew who was also under her parental care) through numerous hustles while volunteering her heart to serve and volunteer in various ways in the community. Giving back, Nyke emphasizes empowerment by creating programs that give single moms a “hand up” instead of a “hand out”. The two also talk about the devastating murder of the nephew she raised and what it has been for her family to find healing. Listen in to this episode to be encouraged as a mom and inspired by Nyke’s advocacy for women and children trying to figure life out. Highlights: As a young single mom, the hustle of trying to figure this thing out. Stepping up your game financially, educational wise. Pick out different things, so if you get tired of this direction you have something to fall back on because it falls on you alone and you want to make sure you are providing the absolute best. What it takes today to stay connected in our families. God gives you children for a minute. They were never yours. They were yours to raise and let go. Letting go is the hardest thing. Be proud of yourself for what you accomplished as a mom. “I was living on subsidized housing. I was living, you know, using SNAP benefits. I said, I want to use this as a platform. When God puts me in a place where he wants me to bless other women such as I was, I want to do that” Honoring the delicate balance between empowering the single parent verses having pity on them. There is a single mom feeling of, ‘I don't want to be seen as less than I don't want to be seen as needy.’  Nyke talks about a “hand up” versus the “hand out”. It's a really important feeling for single parents to feel like there are other people who truly understand and have their back. In order to be the best you can be, you have to face your past. In my forties, I worry about who I am. I care about what I want, how I feel, I care about me. Quotes: “Life doesn't come with the manual on how to be a woman.” “I love what I do. I'm a voice for a single woman and her children. I was her not only that teenager that was trying to figure it out. I mean, you know, consistency is key, but so few commit to the process.” “I don't care if you are trash lady and you're picking up trash, you need to be the best trash picker up there is.” “Because if you don't have a mother that can take care of herself first, how could she provide to give to her kids?” Connect with Nyke: Website: www.NykeLatrice.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/nyke_latrice Facebook: www.Facebook.com/NykeLatrice Launching a beauty concierge services soon: F.A.C.E. (Females Always Create Excellence) Nyke Latrice is a lifestyle coach, licensed aesthetician, makeup and skincare specialist, motivational speaker and advocate for women and children. HeR mission in life is helping women evolve through life’s lessons by learning HeR first, empowering HeR and finding HeR self love. Through her numerous endeavors, Nyke has established herself as a leader in the beauty industry and in the Middle Tennessee communities. As a mother, Nyke believes that family is top priority in the balance of her life. She draws upon her own emotional life experiences to encourage others with her message of hope, empowerment, and success. An energetic and positive-speaking life coach, Nyke has the ability to edify her students and followers, and help them discover their true potential. Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with genius mentor and beautiful soul, Tania Blanco. Tania shares the painful journey of losing her true self through her involvement in a religious organization and through her marriage. Kara and Tania talk about how she was not allowed to have a voice, but rather as a woman had to comply. You will hear how this emotional suffering showed up as physical problems in her body. Tania shares what it took to reclaim her power, create boundaries and dance her way back into loving her life.  Highlights: The motto in our home was to dream, to work for it, and no one is going to stop you. The pain of losing yourself and your voice. Hiding your genius and dimming your shine to keep people around you happy. Your emotional suffering shows up in your physical body. What happens when boundaries fall away in our life and what to do when you realize that. Reclaim you own power Food is powerful medicine, a very important element of our well-being. Using nutrition to help nurture your body. It's not about the situations we go through, but how we navigate them…Take responsibility and make decisions and go forward with action. Ask for help. Accept Help. Don’t wait to talk about it till you have solved it. Tania passionately guides us through ways to tangibly connect with nature, which was an important part of her own healing journey Quotes: “Vulnerability is a gift and a strength.” “I started missing my own self. Where is Tania? This person that I look in the mirror is not me.” “I wanted to fit. I wanted to be loved. I want to wanted to be part of this ideal of life.” “My physical body couldn't handle it.” “when you are doing things because you have to conform, you lose…your own personal path” “I knew that it was the moment for me to reclaim my own power... No one took it from me. I gave it away.” “Then we forget sometimes that we are part of nature.” “Seeing me and just being with me in it… It's so important to just listen.” Episode Resources: PINK – Never Gonna Not Dance Again https://open.spotify.com/track/0Uv0h4QmjeR9ew5AjyBR3i?si=1be9950e17cf456b Kara Stoltenberg – Restoring Earth (Journal) https://www.karastoltenberg.com/blog/restoring-earth Connect with Tania: Website: https://www.taniablanco.net Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/taniablancoblanco/?locale=en_US FacebookFor Spanish: https://www.facebook.com/taniablanco.blog Facebook For English: https://www.facebook.com/taniablanco.blog.en Tania is a Communicator as well as a Genius & Self-Leadership mentor who works with committed individuals, entrepreneurs, and entrepreneurs to be who are eager to live in flow, with joy and fulfillment. On purpose. As a nature's empath, she's constantly learning from Mother’s Nature Wisdom and rhythms (and sharing her findings). Originally from Mexico and based in Switzerland, she’s passionate about Positive Psychology, the Science of Gratitude and Purpose, as well as everything related to Emotional and Spiritual Intelligence.  She's on a mission to inspire inner change for personal and collective well-being while guiding committed Souls to Shine their Genius, communicate with purpose, and strengthen their EQ muscle, so they can be fulfilled, and LEAD from the essence of their BEING. Note: She works in English, Spanish, and sometimes in French. Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara is stepping in with her client who recently reclaimed life through her second triumphant round with cancer. They explore strength, mental health and Maren’s transition from operating as a tightly wound twine to relaxing, letting go and allowing life to happen. It became obvious in her journey that she needed space to heal all aspects of her being. Once she created the space, she could see that parts of her life were no longer serving her and she knew she had to make changes that aligned to her highest self. Listen in for multiple extremely relatable conversations that took Maren from living in autopilot to conscious choosing in her life. Highlights: Unspoken dynamics of care taking and being cared for within relationships Letting go of responsibility to make everyone comfortable with the fact that you have this hard thing. Laying down her own expectations for normal performance during chemo. Struggling with coming off as weak or unable. Feeling guilty for needing to do nothing in order to heal. The experience of taking forced space The importance of surrounding yourself with people who allow you to share and are capable of listening. Anger is an emotion and it is trying to tell you something  Being comfortable with who you are is super important and not needing to be comfortable with OTHER people’s idea of who you are may be more important. Support others by taking on their mental load (“what can I do for you?” VS. make the choice, do the thing. Allow yourself to receive which opens the pathway for someone else to truly give.  Redefining terms… what is successful? Productivity vs. relaxing (whose expectations am I really trying to meet anyway?) Quotes: “I’m not happy every day. I’m grateful every day. Release the idea that happy every day is the goal.” “Cancer was here to show me some of these things that I had to work through in order to be my best self.” “Don’t get me wrong, cancer is a physical thing… but it is a mind game as well.” Connect with Maren: Maren Wasner is on a new path since having recently journeyed through cancer (for the second time), as well as a major career shift. She’s not out of the medical weeds yet, but is working through how to remain present and work through tough emotions throughout the process. She remains open to all that life brings and wants to trust the unfolding, while learning that it takes time, effort, and constant reminders. Enter Kara… <3 Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with Backlight Productions* choreographer and CYT Nashville Program Director, Elise Horecka. Elise shares with Kara her experience growing up as the younger sister to her oldest sibling, Kari who has Cri du chat, a rare chromosomal syndrome. The two share laughs as Elise recollects fun and funny, unique childhood stories and encourages us all to approach people who are different than us with curiosity and acceptance, even when it is unfamiliar or uncomfortable. Her stories are delightful and her insights are so valuable. Prepare for laughter and a level of heartwarming that is rare. *Backlight Productions is a Nashville, TN based theater company for adults with special needs. Highlights: This is all Elise has ever known, so for her, family modifications for her sister’s needs were and are just normal.  There is so much we can take from these Backlight performers as they are so proud of themselves and focused on the right things. They are excited and proud to be there. It is special for their entire family. If you are willing to be a little uncomfortable, eventually you won’t be, because you will have created a relationship and bond with someone who happens to be a little different than you. Elise shares how it feels when people are awkward, and also when people are well meaning, wanting to lend a hand but it would just be easier to sort it out on their own. Tips for parents to equip their kids to be comfortable interacting with and accepting a person with special needs. Quotes: “It takes time to build understanding and relationship. Everyone deserves that. Just take the time.” “It’s ok to learn about people who you don’t naturally connect with because of the differences you have. Be willing to ask the questions and be uncomfortable in it at first and then eventually, you won’t be because you will have created the relationship and bond.” “I don’t remember what he said, but I definitely remember threatening to beat him up.” (elementary aged Elise in response to a boy making mean comments about her sister) “As a kid it’s hard to explain – “This is my sister, here’s how to act.” You kind of want to have your own life. You don’t want to talk about it or have a whole lesson about it.” “I like when people ask me, ‘What does your sister have?’… I really appreciate friends who want to get to know her. I didn’t realize how much I needed it.” Connect with Elise: Website: https://backlightproductions.org Elise Horecka grew up in Nashville and found a passion for creating and teaching theater and dance. She graduated from Belmont University in 2013 with a degree in Entertainment Industry Studies and Theater. She is the current  Dance Program Director at Backlight Productions and Program Director of CYT Nashville. Both communities give her the opportunity to share her love of the performing arts with adults with special needs and kids, and provide that to people who don't often get to be a part of it.  Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with Amy Wiebe Ewoldt, a beautiful momma who has suffered unfathomable loss. Amy shares how in 2013, she lost her youngest son, Kyle while on an adventure from Australia to New Zealand aboard a famous 1920’s sailboat. Kyle bought a one-way ticket to New Zealand, met the captain of the Nina’ and begged him to join the voyage. He was eager to learn and easy to like… so without any sailing experience, the captain still agreed to let him join the crew. Amy holds onto the fact that “Kyle would’ve gone if there was a hole in the boat.” In this gentle sharing of both her and Kyle’s story, Amy offers us wisdom from a very vulnerable and deep place. Listen in to hear funny and inspiring stories of adventure and a zest for life that will live on in Kyle’s family and friends forever, while holding the unfathomable loss of a child and the life that continues on without him physically here. Highlights: The many emotions Amy and her family went through as they waited and hoped while the search for the lost ship continued  The day to day of putting one foot in front of the other, just plugging on. Things that felt supportive both during the search and after the search was called off, as Amy and her family adjusted expectations. It just feels like he is “hitch-hiking across the sea”. The shift from hope to feelings of hopelessness as the search was called off. Things they do to honor Kyle on significant days like his birthday, the day the storm hit and the day the search called off. A line in life – before and after things aren’t the same. The weight in carrying it every single day It’s hard to get up every day (sometimes self-care = getting up every morning and just GOING) No one can say “It’s gonna be ok”, because it’s never gonna be ok. Amy shares how she would offer comfort to any parent who has lost a child. “You cannot pretend to know what someone is going through, even if you have a shared experience.” She makes herself available to anyone who may just need a place to land, a place to be heard. “If there is a mother going through the loss of a child, I’m easily accessible. I will listen to you.” Quotes: “Kyle loved doing what no one else would do.” “We went on hope.” “It was hard knowing that even if they were out there on a lifeboat, they were not going to be found.”  “My pain is no greater than your pain.” “You have to take time for yourself and your children have to do what they need to do.”  “He lives on through all of us.” “Hug your kids. Tell them that you love them.” Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with Rosa Cao Liu. Rosa is a remarkable young woman, who as an Asian Latin American immigrant from Venezuela moved to Canada by herself when she was only 17 years old. Kara and Rosa talk about what a frightening experience it was to know no one and speak a different language in a new culture.   Rosa encourages us to seek opportunities to bring growth into our lives by facing challenges with a winning mindset while brilliantly guiding us to our bodies when making any decision. She offers valuable insights to new language learners and tips for encouragement if you find yourself bridging the gap of communication with someone who speaks a different language than you. She is such an inspiration and her story of valor and bravery will motivate you and just plain make you feel good! Highlights: Practical tips for new language learners in a different culture trying to communicate. Get out of your head and into your body. Learn to use your intuition. Using adversity as an opportunity to grow. Approach anyone who is trying to learn a new language with a tremendous amount of admiration. Rose method:  R = remembering our roots O = outdoing ourselves  S = seeking opportunities E = ensuring consistency Quotes: “Because I had no one, I had to learn on my own and rely on myself.” “I'm leaving everything behind and I'm starting a brand new future.” “It's very frustrating that when you feel that you have so much to say, but you don't have the ability or you don't have the knowledge to communicate that and it makes you more frustrated.” “I learned to communicate effectively… isn’t just about expressing yourself. (There's also) many things that can me can be misconstrued if you don't do it well. (That was) a primary motivator to learn how to speak English better every day.” “What makes people successful is having a high level of self-awareness and using that self-awareness to propel themselves forward.” “The moment of realization when you see that it didn't matter what other people were doing, it only mattered what I was doing every day. And it was my own journey and that's when I realized, and this was the moment when I realized that in order to succeed, you have to have a growth mindset and you should not compare yourself to others, but rather yourself to yourself, because everybody else has different strengths and different weaknesses.” “When you compare yourself to yourself and are you better today than who you were yesterday, then you can truly see how far you've come and you are able to appreciate your journey a lot more.” Connect with Rosa: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rosacaoliu Rosa Cao Liu is an Asian Latin American immigrant born in Venezuela, of Chinese descent. She is a TEDx speaker, growth mentor, and co-author of “The Gifts of Pain”, who weaves her Immigrant identity and resilient journey to ignite personal and professional growth.  Through her R.O.S.E Method, she aims to empower people to unlock their true capabilities and lead more fulfilling lives. A career advisor and coach for almost a decade, Rosa obtained her BBA in Management and Human Resources from the esteemed University of Toronto Scarborough in 2017. Her purpose is to be able to inspire others to become the best version of themselves. She is very passionate about drawing out people's truest potential so that they are able to live much more fulfilling lives. She is currently an HR Systems Analyst at a global mining company, Kinross Gold Corporation, and aspires to be a motivational speaker. Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara is stepping in with Clarity Coach and Pause Box founder and CEO, Meredith Vaish. They are talking about the journey she went through after years of making it all happen as a powerhouse female hustling in Silicon Valley during the tech boom of the early 2000s, followed by a 16-year career as Marketing Communication Strategist at Stanford University all while operating as an amazing family woman, married to the love of her life and raising their 2 daughters. Kara and Meredith talk about her forced stop when her body suddenly hit a wall and said with symptoms, “Hey, I can’t do all the hustle anymore.” Meredith shares how she had to really pay attention and change some of the ways she was doing all things.  Highlights: Learning to take up space. Are you comfortable needing space?  Feeling shame to ask for the space needed, afraid to let her team down. The voices in our head become the voices we imagine others are thinking about us. It takes trust to give up a good thing, knowing it’s not for you. Take a “soul-batical” to rest and do some creative things. Releasing it all and being ok with, there is nothing. Take time to listen and stop trying to figure it all out. Explore the 3 energies of hustle – pleasing, proving, and perfectionism. Learn self-honoring as part of succeeding. If you want to feel more golden, you have to dial up trust (which means turning down control) and turn on self-honoring (no more self-abandonment in the name of outcomes and success). Being very successful and yet feeling like a failure Turn on trust and self-honoring (and have compassion) when you see yourself in abandonment. Meredith shares her energy quiz to help you identify where you are operating from – hustle, struggle, autopilot or the golden, creative zone. Quotes: “I would just deliver, deliver, deliver. There was nothing I've never delivered. I don't even think I'd had a failure.”  “Who am I if I am not doing all the things?” (After taking space and going through healing,) “With solidarity, I knew I never want to go back…I couldn’t heal in a corporate cubical.” “The need to prove yourself and be valuable is a thread that needs to be untied. We are valuable.”  “I had to let go of the idea that I was being betrayed…My body is not betraying me (with the symptoms). She is my ally” “After 50 we are so powerful. How do you want to use your power today?” Connect with Meredith: Website: https://pauseboxco.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pauseboxco/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/meredith.vaish LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/meredithvaish/ Meredith Vaish (pronounced: Vesh) is a Clarity Coach, Pause Box CEO, and Host of The Full Living After 50 Podcast. She’s passionate about helping women CREATE WHAT’s NEXT through intuition and soul-guided action so they can step into their biggest dreams without draining themselves. Meredith is a certified Sourced (™) Coach & Retreat Leader and lives in the SF Bay Area. Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with author, speaker and brother, Keeper Catran-Whitney.  Keeper is the author of an amazing book, Helplessness: The Mental Health Challenges Brothers Experience After Learning our Sisters Have Been Sexually Abused by our Parents. Kara and Keeper dive deeply into the moment that changed everything in his family. One minute they were set to escape extreme poverty, signing on with Motown records to be the “new” Jackson 5 and the next, everything broke as the brothers learned their step father had been molesting their sisters for years and their mother knew about it the whole time. Keeper shares candidly about the way he experienced this trauma in his family and the way silence ate at him for 45 years until he finally found the way forward through conversations with his siblings. Join Kara and Keeper as they unpack a very dark and heavy topic while bringing light and the redemption of healing to the forefront. This is a beautiful and important conversation that offers healing and insight into unthinkable trauma. Highlights: As brothers, though the abuse didn’t happen to them, it affected them (traumatized them) and their sisters didn’t want to talk to them about it. Keeper highlights that as a brother there are no resources, which is what fueled him to speak out and create a place for brothers to break the silence. As a society we need to realize how rampant this is and how much it affects people's lives for the rest of their lives. When sexual abuse is part of your story, even if you've done beautiful healing work, it is part of your story. As a brother, Keeper shares he was so consumed with anger, guilt and shame. His self-esteem and self-worth had really just taken a beating. As a brother, be willing to let your sister say everything she needs to say. We step in with each other and just try to understand each other's experiences, I think this is where in humanity we can really make these deep connections and have compassion for one another. Giving rise to brothers in their conversation so that brothers and sisters can heal and empower each other. ‘I was sexually abused as a child’ has become an acceptable thing to say. But talking about it, really being honest about how it's affecting you today, that's still pretty taboo. Quotes: “And then as a brother, you hear the words. You can never prepare for…it makes no difference how old you are as a brother. When you hear your sisters have been sexually abused, it is devastating.” “And that's it for brothers. It's just guilt and shame that we feel at not being able to protect our sisters. That becomes all consuming.” “Having a conversation with my sister was the most empowering, healing conversation of my life.” “Brothers need to know that they are not alone. It makes no difference how old you are. If you are a brother and you are carrying this in silence, you are carrying it in silence.”   “I don't have words for the power behind these conversations and the power of healing that it brought to me to listen to them.” (Kara about listening to Keeper’s family conversations) Connect with Keeper: Website: www.KeeperCatranWhitney.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KeeperCatranWhitneyAuthor Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/keepercw/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@keepercatranwhitney Keeper Catran-Whitney is the author of the book HELPLESSNESS, which is book one of the three-book series From Helplessness To Hopefulness To Happiness. His podcast, "This is For The Brothers," found on his website as a series of conversations exploring the impact on brothers of their sisters' sexual abuse.  Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with Jennifer Sullivan, a beautiful woman who (with her husband) made the exciting and courageous decision to move their family to live in Costa Rica. Jen shares that they had 3 dreams for their kids: to become confident world travelers, speak another language and know that life isn’t only suburban US. Their story took an unexpected turn when she was diagnosed with breast cancer days before selling their home and making the move. Kara and Jennifer explore the decision to move anyway, the journey through breast cancer with her family living in 2 countries and the deep depression she experienced beyond her healing. They talk about the humility of occupying the position of needing and receiving when the needs go beyond a round of casseroles. Jen shares beautiful stories of living and being in a completely different culture and the lens of perspective she discovered by being the minority. Highlights: -It’s easy to get stopped in fear with so many unknowns. Faith has to be greater than fear. -The beauty and generosity of community (beyond the casseroles) -Learning the balance of giving and receiving -Be inspired as Jen allows us to step into the world of Costa Rica and PURA VIDA “pure life” -Coming back caused her family to unpack the extreme programming of all the things you are “supposed to be doing”. -Bringing the slow-down of Costa Rica back into this culture -Say no. Be intentional about what’s really important to you (not what it will look like on social media or in the Christmas card, on a college app). -Know what makes you happy and what doesn’t. -In the aftermath after treatment Jen experienced deep depression, a loss of self-worth and negative scripts looping in her mind. -Who you are vs. What you do - Jen vulnerably shares how she hid the feelings of depression from most people and a few ideas on ways she coped during this time. Quotes: -“Asking for help is a gift.” -“There are so many different ways to do the right thing. What’s right for you and your kid?” -“I didn’t want stupid cancer taking away our dreams.”  -“If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”  Episode Resources:  Pura Vida: Pura Vida is the national motto of Costa Rica and it sums up everything I am going to miss about it.  We’ve lived in Costa Rica for two years and Pura Vida has permeated my soul.  Literally translated, Pura Vida means “simple life” or “pure life,” but in Costa Rica, it is more than just a saying—it is a way of life.  It means being thankful and not dwelling on the negative.  It means no worries, no fuss, no stress.  It’s an emotion.  It’s an attitude. It’s happiness. It means let your worries go, everything will get done in due time.  It means let go of the things you can’t control. Enjoy the world around you. Live in the moment that is right now. It’s an inherent part of the Costa Rican culture and I want to figure out how to recreate it so I can take it with me, wherever I go. -written by Jennifer Sullivan and Bev Gray Connect with Jennifer: J. Sullivan Advisors Encore Retreats Thriving Through Transitions Retreat Rock The Empty Nest virtual conference  Jen is a travel junkie and now, an entrepreneur. She developed her expertise and her unique ability to create extraordinary experiences by working for The Ritz-Carlton Hotel Company for 20 years. Now she is the owner of a boutique travel consultancy, J. Sullivan Advisors, and the co-founder of a luxury experiential retreat company, Encore Retreats. Jennifer and her husband have welcomed friends and family into seven different homes in two different countries while raising their kids to be confident and conscientious world travelers. They reside in Richmond, Virginia but who knows where they will end up next! Connect with Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.steppinginwithkara.com Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

In this episode, Kara steps in with inspirational pop artist, songwriter and founder of “The Friends Forever Club”, Nedy Valdivia. The two unpack how her parent’s divorce affected her as a child and has affected her throughout life as various experiences have compounded the wounds of confusion, abandonment and feeling replaced. They share a vulnerable and deeply healing conversation where Nedy taps into the eight-year-old part of her and gives her a voice. If you went through the divorce of your own parents or are a parent navigating divorce with children, you are not going to want to miss this episode! Highlights: Going from being daddy's girl to feeling very replaced, like an outsider. My dad replaced us with his wife and two younger siblings. There wasn’t really a place for me in their home. “We were the visitors.”  That affected me more than I realized. As a kid you have a lot of emotions but you don’t have words. It’s a lot of confusion and loneliness. As a kid you don’t really know how to talk about it. The 8-year-old part of Nedy who felt her first heartbreak, has shown up throughout her life as a desperate feeling for love, subconscious fear she was never good enough and a fear of rejection and abandonment.Different circumstances come up over and over in your life that deepen those first wounds. We all wear different glasses, we all have different perceptions. Many years later it's still how things are. “It's just a matter of acceptance.” My expectations of my father became little to nothing. The lower your expectations are, the harder it is to be disappointed. Pain gave me a passion to live life to its fullest. It’s made me a warrior. What we go through is so influential, It affects who we become, what do and what we're passionate about. It’s powerful medicine to be the person that you eight-year-old self needed.  Quotes: “I experienced my first heartbreak when I was eight years old.” “I would have liked to have been more included.” “There was them and there was us. It still hurts so much.” “I just want to be loved. Fought for. Pursued. Like when it’s not easy.” “You went through that pain for this amount of time. Our pain continued for the rest of our lives.” “I believe that bullying is hatred.” “Part of you wishes you never went through that pain. But then you see the beauty that comes from it and then you're like, wow.” Connect to Nedy: Website: https://officialnedy.com In with the Outcasts: https://www.iwtotv.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/officialnedy There have always been those whose hearts dance to the beat of a different drum, those who see the world in a different way, and those who find our differences far more beautiful than our similarities. NEDY is one of those people. Armed with an enchanting spirit and a musical talent that is nothing short of stunning, NEDY is an inspirational pop artist poised to lead her loyal fandom into a brighter future. Her new single “Made to Be” now serves as the cornerstone to a new chapter in her career, in which her artistic soul never again tries to mold into someone else’s expectations. THIS is the music that NEDY has waited a lifetime to create. Connect to Kara: Website: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg⁠ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

Kara is joined by one of her lifelong friends. They explore the journey from shame and self-hatred to deep self-love through Brittany’s journey with breast implants, breast implant illness, and eventual removal of the implants to create health and vitality. Her journey through extreme body symptoms of chronic fatigue, dysfunctional brain fog, heart arrhythmia, motor issues led her to the discovery that her breast implants were causing these problems. She developed a plan to explant and get a fat transfer which further backfired and caused more problems. Join us for cleansing tears, vulnerability and ultimately a story of triumph over shame and imperfection. This is a woman who has found purpose in her pain… turning what felt like the awful in her life into a beautiful, valuable offering to other women. Highlights:  Body insecurities (which Brittany brilliantly emphasizes are not at all about the body). Brittany encourages us all to love our bodies, no matter our shape and size. The cultural drive to focus on body image  If you have ever disliked parts of your body, you will be inspired as Brittany has gone from hating parts of her body to learning to be SO OK in her skin “In our imperfection, we are just what we are meant to be” “I finally feel whole… and love me for me.” Connect with Brittany: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/1brittanyheyden Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1brittanyheyden TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@1brittanyheyden Website: https://brittanyheyden.com Free Masterclass: https://www.thefatiguefixx.com/register Brittany DeVall Heyden is a nurse practitioner, owner and CEO of Renovaré Functional Medicine located in north central Nebraska. She is also a virtual health coach helping women FIXX fatigue and live with vitality by addressing the underlying imbalances within the body.  Brittany developed a love for functional medicine after battling her own health issues. Once she began to address the underlying source of her health problems, she realized the potential of a root-cause approach. She now dedicates her life to helping other women find health and well-being they once thought impossible. Connect with Kara: Website: https://www.karastoltenberg.com Newsletter: https://www.karastoltenberg.com/subscribe Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/steppinginwithkara Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karastoltenberg --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

Join me as I step in to beautiful conversations with men and women from many walks of life who are willing to share their stories. These chats will change your perspectives, challenge your judgements, cultivate more compassion and straight up offer you a toolbox of real time offerings if you find yourself in the thick of life. If you are intrigued to find true peace in your present moment, live from love no matter where you are and cultivate deep acceptance for yourself and the life you are living, you have landed in a gold mine. I am so glad you're here. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/support

Here's an update I shared on my social media outlets about what I've been up to. Please have a listen and stay tuned! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/steppinginwithkara/message