Kagro in the Morning

David Waldman ends the week we'll probably be fondly reminiscing about, marveling at the peace and harmony of those halcyon days… The DOJ is charging California state and local officials with something; it doesn't really matter what. In Alaska and California Trump's point isn't to win in court, it's to create losers. Elena Kagan will tell you it's not about the law anymore. Todd Blanche is personally charging misdemeanors in Nevada. Jeanine Pirro just wishes she could prosecute a misdemeanor. KITM Super-Listener Roger Haick recorded a description of ranked-choice voting for those unfamiliar with the concept, including those in his state of Alaska, who've had it for years now. Jared Kushner spends a lot of time in pockets, picking up billions in loose change, yet his big public deals tend to rely a lot on forgeries. Alina Habba made $50 Million on a pardon deal and had the gall to not kick any up to the boss, not even a dime to the Trump library money laundering fund. Jeffrey Epstein and Donald K. Trump have certain things in common, including really pissing off Houthis. Donald K. Trump and Vladimir Putin have certain things in common, but those are mostly all wonderful secrets. Donald tosses Flávio out of his lifeboat, is Bibi next? RIP to Patrick Stewart, who is so revered and admired that it's amazing that Trump hasn't yet posted shit about him.

David Waldman returns to straighten out this mess, two hours at a time. Normally astute, eminently sagacious Greg Dworkin can't shake that Elon monkey on his back. A sad, dirty habit, not to mention that it took me 20 minutes to find substitute links. Sorry, but a couple of those roaches still did skitter through. And there's the polls. Even Nate Silver would rather talk about vibes. Democrats in polls look fantastic. Republicans in polls look terrible. Reality is due to arrive next week. Dems are flooding the early vote… but did we use up all of our allotment? Are we now out of Dems? Can the Gops catch up? Oh no! Were two Dans Sullivan more than a mere coincidence of demographics? Eh, could be… those things do happen. Ranked-choice voting allows as many Dans as you want. In California, there's money to be made in suppressing votes, but the gold rush might be over for Gop lawyer Bill Essayli. No jail can hold James O'Keefe, who keeps discovering new reasons to be imprisoned. ICE are thugs, but MAGA is angry that they aren't their thugs. Gops were all set to be sick of winning right about now but were shocked to discover that they elected a dim-witted, racist, psychopath. It could only be worse if Donald turned out to be some sort of pedo rapist. The founder of Arab Americans for Trump is as surprised as you are. Illegal alien Flavio Bolsonaro must have some of those bad genes that Donald K. Trump warned us about. Flavio is in Miami and thinks he's Napoleon in Elba. Barack Obama wants to clear up any misunderstanding that his Cheesecake Factory quip might have caused.

David Waldman and Greg Dworkin deliver a KITM with only a week to go before the election denying begins! in the meantime, we have polls, early voting, and other bone throwing to parse. Things are bad, so that's good. Dems are voting like there's no tomorrow. If Gops don't vote tomorrow, Democrats could win, or maybe make Republicans win by less, which is kind of nice. At least Bottoms is up in the Peach State. Political commercial buffs out there (anyone? anyone?) have only a few more days to enjoy this cycle. Lawn sign burglar Tammy Williams was caught pilfering endorsements. Vivek Ramaswamy's anti-Amy ad is an incredible success… well, actually a pretty credible one. Susan Collins new ad is concerning. Many of her voters were already concerned. Barack Obama scorned Saddam Hussein and Donald K. Trump. MAGA heard "Cheesecake Factory". As if anyone needed a reminder of just how much Donald loves the meat. Everyone really does need a reminder, whether they want one or not. Todd Blanche needs to join Ghislaine Maxwell in a real prison. When Jeremy Lewin goes on trial for the murder of over a million people, he'll hopefully put the finger on any trillionaire crime bosses he might have evidence on. Illegal immigrant Flávio Bolsonaro's caravan crossed through a wide-open border into Florida on a visa fast track. Brazil should extradite him and his coconspirator JD Vance. A grand jury declined to indict Cassidy Hutchinson in one of the million cases the Trump administration is presently losing. Jeanine Pirro is out there losing them as fast as she can when not distracted by throwing Kash Patel under buses.

David Waldman gets us within a week of election day. Let's keep going! 0 days since a Trump rally didn't mention ass. This time at least, it was Trump's fat ass… JD likey! Not a KITM summary goes by that we don't point out the connection between Russia, Jeffrey Epstein and Donald Kompromat Trump's America. Today we have the House Judiciary Committee report of Donald joining in Epstein's sexual abuse of young women that his Justice Department then covered up. Yes, a federal judge "blocked" Trump from destroying a local DC golf course. Trump is going to do it anyhow, even if he has to use tanks and mortars instead of bulldozers. Better than anyone, Donald understands justice delayed is justice denied. However, judges can't make democracy better as well as they can make it worse. Maurene Comey has been reinstated with back pay; therefore, the DOJ will attempt to prosecute James Comey again. FBI officials who did not successfully prosecute Hunter Biden will be prosecuted. The DOJ is preemptively interfering in elections… "rig" for short… in California and Alaska, the "Home of the Dans".

Election day is next week! David Waldman reviews the weekend and previews the week, and finally Greg Dworkin returns hauling another Raft O' Stories dropping only a few tips into the mega-MAGA donor's tip jar. Polls. You shouldn't rely on them, even when they aren't fake. Early voting results, neither. Lawn signs… maybe. In fact, if you are a candidate caught stealing your opponent's signs, it might actually work against you. That said… Early voting seems promising for Dems, if you like to believe in that sort of thing. The good news is, even if polling, early voting, and even lawn signs aren't your thing, there's plenty of evidence that maybe, just maybe, this could work out well. Amy ACTION! Acton had a pleasant weekend. Ohio's biggest newspaper, The Plain Dealer, reversed their no-endorsement policy to endorse Acton, and condemn her contemptable opponent, Vivek Ramaswamy. Vivek has always been deplorable yet has become even more Trumpy lately. Venues don't want to get any of him on them. Donald K. Trump's weekend was less pleasant. Trump hates all non-whites, with perhaps the exception of Nicki Minaj, who he just might have discovered a use for... Trump is delighted to take everyone's money for himself, as they'd probably just waste it at the Cheesecake Factory anyhow. Trumplettes crumble around the world, such as Brazil's Flávio Bolsonaro, son of convict Jair Bolsonaro, and Serbian Aleksandar Vučić, who lost to the local student council. Trump will need to find some jobs for them once he hooks up Viktor Orbán and Bibi. Maybe they can all go work for Lorne Doerkson in British Columbia. Trump wants to rig the Senate election of Dan Sullivan, but only if Dan loses. Of course, that's not "legal" but since when has poisoning a well ever been legal? Anyhow, Alaskans are pretty used to folks having the name Dan.