AuDHD and Then Some™ | Hosted by Ellie AuDHD Capstick

⚠️ Content warning: This episode includes discussions of alcohol and drug addiction, psychiatric hospitalisation, serious illness and the impact of addiction on families. Please listen with care.What happens when you’re told you have six months to live if you keep drinking and using drugs? And who supports the family watching someone they love struggle with addiction?In this episode of AuDHD and Then Some, Ellie welcomes John McMahon, whose journey took him from training for the priesthood and living as a hippy to addiction, recovery and a career in psychology.In 1984, John was in a psychiatric hospital facing a stark warning about his future. After getting sober, he returned to education, earned a doctorate in psychology and went on to develop and teach a master’s course in addiction.Alongside his wife, Lou, John created Bottled Up, a website supporting families affected by someone else’s drinking.This conversation explores John’s story alongside questions about recovery, identity, faith, rebuilding a life and recognising the needs of loved ones. It makes room for the people whose exhaustion, fear and uncertainty can too often be overlooked in conversations about addiction.John, thank you so, so much for joining me. I deeply appreciate your honesty, warmth and generosity in sharing your life and everything you have learned along the way. Your willingness to use your experience to support others, including the families who need somewhere to turn, is something I genuinely admire. It was an absolute pleasure to speak with you.CONNECT WITH JOHN AND LOUBottled Up: explore their work, family support resources and information about John’s book:https://www.bottled-up.com/Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/BottledUp247/WATCH OR LISTEN TO THE EPISODEChoose your preferred listening or viewing platform through the AuDHD and Then Some podcast page:https://ellieaudhd.riverside.comIf this conversation resonates with you, please share it with someone who might find it helpful.This episode shares lived experience and discussion, not individual treatment advice. If you or someone you love needs help with alcohol or drug use, please seek qualified professional support.💜 ELLIE AuDHD 👕 Neurodivergent clothing by ND artists: https://www.ellieaudhd.com 🎁 Code TWOBRAINS: 10% off orders over $50 🧠 1:1 mentorship, body doubling & accountability from £14: https://www.ellieaudhd.com/pages/list-of-services 🎙️ Want to be a guest? https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/ellieaudhdhostlink New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday. If this episode helped, please follow and leave a rating. It really helps other ND people find us. 🍉

⚠️ Content note: This episode includes conversations about alcohol addiction, mental health, shame and recovery. Please listen with care.Knowing that something has become a problem is not always the same as being ready to change it.In this episode of *AuDHD and Then Some*, Ellie speaks with Peg O’Connor, a professor of philosophy, author of four books and recovering alcoholic who believes philosophy helped her get and stay sober.Peg shares what it felt like to become deeply disorientated within her own life, to lose her sense of identity and self-respect, and to feel as though she belonged more to alcohol, impossible expectations and old grievances than she belonged to herself.Together, Ellie and Peg explore:• The dangerous gap between recognising an addiction and feeling ready to recover• Whether somebody really needs to reach rock bottom• Shame, self-deception and the stories we tell ourselves• What it means to belong to yourself• Rebuilding identity and self-respect in recovery• Why recovery can take many different forms• The role philosophy can play in creating a meaningful life• Moving from knowing what you do not want towards discovering who you want to becomeThis is a thoughtful and honest conversation about addiction, identity, readiness and the difficult but liberating work of creating a life that genuinely feels like your own.Take Peg O’Connor’s free Ready to Recover Quiz to discover whether you currently identify as a Disconnected Self, an Awakening Self or a Ready Self:https://pegoconnorauthor.com/ready-to-recover-quiz-landing/Please remember that this podcast shares personal experiences and general information. It is not a replacement for professional medical or mental-health advice, diagnosis or treatment.💜 ELLIE AuDHD 👕 Neurodivergent clothing by ND artists: https://www.ellieaudhd.com 🎁 Code TWOBRAINS: 10% off orders over $50 🧠 1:1 mentorship, body doubling & accountability from £14: https://www.ellieaudhd.com/pages/list-of-services 🎙️ Want to be a guest? https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/ellieaudhdhostlink New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday. If this episode helped, please follow and leave a rating. It really helps other ND people find us. 🍉

Content warning: This episode discusses a childhood brain tumour, serious surgery, physical recovery and clinical depression. Please listen with care and step away if you need to.What happens when your brain has survived something life-changing, but you are left believing that you are broken?At thirteen years old, Ayis Caperonis was diagnosed with a brain tumour and told that he might never walk unaided, finish school or live a normal life. He survived experimental surgery with around a thirty per cent chance of success, learned to walk again, completed his education and went on to become a husband and father of three.The harder and less visible battle came afterwards: clinical depression.In this deeply honest conversation, Ayis explains what depression can feel like during an ordinary day when motivation, energy and hope have disappeared. He shares the small, repeatable actions that helped him continue moving forward, without demanding a complete personality transformation from himself.We also explore what it means to show up imperfectly for the people we love, how neurodivergent people can work with their actual capacity, and why acknowledging our limits does not mean allowing them to define our entire future. Ayis also discusses faith without shame, the importance of professional support and the practical ways AI now helps him work with the brain he has today.Ayis is the author of Staring Down Depression, a practical guide shaped by lived experience. His message is simple and powerful: a brain that has been through something difficult is still capable of change. Your limits are real, but they are not the whole story.Topics include:• Surviving a childhood brain tumour• Recovering from experimental brain surgery• The everyday reality of clinical depression• Small, repeatable steps when motivation is gone• Neurodivergence and working with your capacity• Showing up imperfectly as a husband and father• Faith without shame• AI as a practical support tool• What helps when someone is depressed• Recognising when professional support is neededAyis speaks from his own lived experience and does not present himself as a therapist or replacement for professional care.Find Ayis’s book, Staring Down Depression, here:https://www.amazon.com/Staring-Down-Depression-Practical-Perspectives-ebook/dp/B0H9JDTDLQ💜 ELLIE AuDHD 👕 Neurodivergent clothing by ND artists: https://www.ellieaudhd.com 🎁 Code TWOBRAINS: 10% off orders over $50 🧠 1:1 mentorship, body doubling & accountability from £14: https://www.ellieaudhd.com/pages/list-of-services 🎙️ Want to be a guest? https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/ellieaudhdhostlink New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday. If this episode helped, please follow and leave a rating. It really helps other ND people find us. 🍉

Content warning: This episode discusses narcissistic abuse, emotional abuse, betrayal, infidelity and divorce. Please listen with care and step away if you need to.What happens when the man everyone else sees as “nice” makes you feel as though nothing you do is ever good enough?In this episode, Ellie speaks with Laura Richards, bestselling author, podcaster, speaker and post-betrayal transformation coach. Laura shares her experience of leaving a 32-year marriage and gradually uncovering decades of lies, betrayal and behaviour she came to recognise as covert narcissistic abuse.Laura explains what narcissistic abuse can look like behind closed doors, particularly when the person responsible appears charming, helpful and respectable to everyone else. She talks honestly about walking on eggshells, overlooking warning signs, questioning her own reality and maintaining the outward appearance of a happy marriage.This is also a conversation about what happens afterwards. Laura shares how she began rebuilding her identity, trusting herself again and finally using the voice she had kept quiet for so many years. Despite the seriousness of her story, Laura speaks with extraordinary grace, dignity and humour.Topics include:• Covert narcissistic abuse• The “nice guy” public persona• Emotional manipulation and betrayal• Red flags that are easy to dismiss• Why survivors may stay for many years• Rebuilding self-worth after divorce• Learning to trust yourself again• Finding your voice after abuse• Healing without shameIf you have ever wondered whether your experiences were “bad enough”, questioned your own memories or felt completely alone after betrayal, this conversation may help you feel seen and understood.Connect with Laura and receive a free chapter of her book, You’re Not Crazy: Reclaiming Your Sanity and Self-Worth After Narcissistic Abuse:https://niceguyrecoveryco.kit.com/a7b3ffee07💜 ELLIE AuDHD 👕 Neurodivergent clothing by ND artists: https://www.ellieaudhd.com 🎁 Code TWOBRAINS: 10% off orders over $50 🧠 1:1 mentorship, body doubling & accountability from £14: https://www.ellieaudhd.com/pages/list-of-services 🎙️ Want to be a guest? https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/ellieaudhdhostlink New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday. If this episode helped, please follow and leave a rating. It really helps other ND people find us. 🍉

This episode discusses parental alcoholism, childhood emotional abuse, violence within the home, chronic stress and unhealthy relationships. Please listen with care. When does being busy become living in survival mode? And how can the coping mechanisms that once protected us eventually lead to burnout and self-abandonment? In this episode of AuDHD and Then Some,Ellie speaks with Lolita Guarin, bestselling author, speaker, book coach and creator of the CALM Process. Lolita grew up in Lithuania during the Soviet era in a home affected by alcoholism, fear and emotional uncertainty. She shares how that environment shaped her anxiety, hypervigilance and desire for control, and how those survival patterns continued into adulthood after she moved to America.Together, Ellie and Lolita explore: • The difference between ordinary stress and survival mode • How childhood environments shape our adult stress responses• Why familiar patterns can feel safer than healthy change • Self-abandonment, boundaries and rebuilding self-trust• Why people remain loyal to behaviours and relationships that hurt them• The practical thinking behind Lolita’s CALM Process • Limiting what causes harm and multiplying what genuinely helps• Turning painful experiences into writing, wisdom and purpose• Finding the courage to honour our own needs This is a vulnerable, funny and deeply insightful conversation about recognising the patterns we have inherited, asking how they are still serving us and choosing not to abandon ourselves any longer.Connect with Lolita and explore her work: Website: https://www.beamazingyou.com/ Book a personal session with Lolita: https://beamazingyou.lpages.co/book-a-session/Follow AuDHD and Then Some on your preferred podcast platform for more honest conversations about neurodivergence, trauma, recovery and the complicated reality of being human. :::💜 ELLIE AuDHD 👕 Neurodivergent clothing by ND artists: https://www.ellieaudhd.com 🎁 Code TWOBRAINS: 10% off orders over $50 🧠 1:1 mentorship, body doubling & accountability from £14: https://www.ellieaudhd.com/pages/list-of-services 🎙️ Want to be a guest? https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/ellieaudhdhostlink New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday. If this episode helped, please follow and leave a rating. It really helps other ND people find us. 🍉