13 - A Story About You. (R)
You listen to a podcast. You check the episode description to see what is in store this time. It is a different kind of description than you are used to. You suspect the episode will be a different kind of episode than you are used to. You listen. (This episode originally posted December 15, 2012.)
Weather: 'Local Honey' by Al Riggs (alriggs.bandcamp.com)
IT'S FINALLY HERE... WELCOME TO NIGHT VALE: THE NOVEL. welcometonightvale.com, click on novel.
NYC LIVE SHOWS JAN 22-24, 2016 (added matinee on Jan 24!)
AUSTRALIA / NEW ZEALAND TOUR FEB 6-13, 2016: welcometonightvale.com, click on live shows.
Music: Disparition, disparition.info.
Logo: Rob Wilson, robwilsonwork.com.
Following script is auto-generated by Speech to Text Technology:
welcome to Part two of our January hiatus we have another slightly remixed classic episode this one all the way back from two thousand and twelve good Lord but first I have some big news welcome to my fil live show has turned into its own great things something for both longtime fans and for people who have no idea who we are to enjoy together we've done it for sold out crowds York and L A in London and in just a week or so in Sydney so the big announcement a moment but let's start there will be starting our new Zealand Australia tour in just few days will be flying twenty or so from New York to your lovely countries tickets are still available in many of the cities this was a difficult or to put together some hoping you all come out to see it to be a fun show and maybe we can all figure out how to do it again someday tickets at work and I feel dot com click on live then and here's the news I was talking about we are taking the show back onto the road in the United States this April with a brand new script that we are working on right now Jeffrey and I am so excited about this new knife the story were building view as always along live musical scoring but desperation there will be guest stars and live whether by karaoke and Danny Schmidt the tour is going all over the East Coast and Midwest here's the cities Boston Portland that's Maine's Portland New England North Hampton Ithaca Cleveland Detroit Indianapolis Cincinnati Louisville St Louis Chicago Milwaukee Minneapolis Washington D C Raleigh Charleston Atlanta and finally our nation's capital Philadelphia tickets go on sale next Friday January twenty seconds and the presale for our night Phil Scouts starts on Wednesday January twenty and go to the donation page or website to learn about how you can get in on that pre sale tickets and details that welcome to fill dot com click on Life shows we can't wait to take the spoon until light show on the road see you all there are now on with the story about someone you know very very well this is a story about you said the man on the radio and you were pleased because you always wanted to hear about yourself on the radio the night the the uh the the the the the the the the the the the the the this is a story about you you live in a trailer out near the car lot next to old woman Joe C's house occasionally she'll wave at you on her way out to get the mail or more snacks for the Angels occasionally you'll wave back you're not a terrible neighbor as far as it goes at night you can see the red light blinking on and off on top of the radio tower a tiny flurry of human activity against the implacable backdrop of stars and Foye will sit out on the steps of your trailer with your back to the brightness of the car lot watching the radio tower for hours but only sometimes mostly if you do other things this story is about you you didn't always live in I fail you lived somewhere else where there were more trees more water you wrote direct mail campaigns for companies selling their products dear President you wrote off and finally some good news in this dreary world at last a reason not to kill yourself then you would delete that and write something else and it would be sent out and it would not be read by anyone the you had a friend and the girlfriend and then a fiance the same person she cooked dinner sometimes but sometimes you cooked you often talk the the ah one day you were walking from the glass box of your office two year old Ford probe and a vision came to you you saw above you a planet of awesome size lit by no sun and invisible Titan old thick black forests and jacket mountains and deep turbulent oceans it was so far away so desolate and so with possibly terrifying the dark and that day you did not go home you drove instead you drove a long time and eventually you ended up in Night veil and you stopped driving you have been haunted ever sense by how easy it was to walk away from your life and how few the repercussions were you never heard from your fiance or your job again they never looked for you which doesn't seem likely or maybe it's the day night failed you cannot be found the complete freedom the lack of consequence it terrifies you and the you have a new job now the every day except Sunday you drive out into the sand wastes and there you find two trucks move wooden crates from one truck to the other while a man in a suit silently watches it is a different man each time sometimes the crates tick mostly they do know when you're done the man in the suit pants you an amount of cash also different each time you go home it is the best job you've ever had except today it was different you moved the crates the man in the suit a stranger watch but then as had never happened before the man in the suit received a phone call he walked off at some distance to take it yes sir he said and no sir also he made Hawk shrieking sounds it wasn't terribly interesting you move crates but then an impulse and all full impulse came over you and for no other reason than that you are trapped by the freedom to do anything in this life you took one of the crates and put it in your trunk by the time the man came back from his phone call you're done with your job he gave you the money it was nearly five hundred dollars Today the second highest it had ever been and you drove home with the crate in your trunk when you got home you took the crates into your trailer and left it in the kitchen the crate did not make a ticking sound it made no sound at all nothing made a sound except you breathing in and breathing out you cooked dinner you always cook dinner the red light on the tower blinked on and off in your peripheral vision a message that was there and then wasn't and that you could never quite read you wondered how long it would take them to miss the crate you do not wonder Who dey were some mysteries are two questions to be answered but just the kind of opaque fact a thing which exists to be not know which brings us to now to this story this story about you you are listening to the radio the announcer is talking about you and then you hear something else of guttural howl out of the desert distance and you know that the crates absence has been discovered the crate well it's it's that's all on the kitchen floor that's all it's warm warmer than the air around it it smells sharp and earthy like freshly ground cinnamon and when you put your year against the rough warmer would you hear a soft humming and in distinct melody it does not appear to be difficult to open all you would need to do is remove a few nails you do not open it you decide instead to go to the moon light all night diner and have a slice of pie the wind is hot like always and smells like honey and mud night is your favorite Time daylight brings only a chain of visual sensations none of which coherent a meaning for you anymore life has become out of focus free of consequence as you drive you turn off the headlights for a moment in that moment you feel again above you not even far away now that the planet of awesome size late by no sign and invisible tight in all black forests and jagged mountains and the turbulent oceans you see nothing but the faint moonlight on your dashboard but you know the planet is out there yawning in the unseen spaces the moment passes you turn your headlights back on and all you see is a road just asphalt just that and you pass a man waving summer for flags indicating that the speed limit for this stretch is forty five the moonlight all night is radiant green slab of meat like in the warm darkness you squint when you see it like it hurts your eyes but it does not hurt your eyes you park near the front door a man rolls by on the ground is on is bleary and cyclists whispering the word mud to woo over and over but you don't have the money to tip them so you go inside you order a slice of strawberry pie and the waitress indicates through words and movements that it will be brought to you presently the Radio speaks soothing lead from static key speakers set into a foam tiles it is telling a story about you your story we when we the man slides into the booth across from you you recognize him fatally although he looks considerably different now it is that man who appeared to be of Slavic origin but who dressed in an absurd caricature of an Indian chief and called himself the Apache tracker except now it's difficult for you to miss he has actually transformed into a Native American you wonder if the pie will get there soon the Apache tracker smells of potting soil and sweat he leans across the table and touches your hand likely you do not pull the hand away because you know that there will be no consequence for any of this vivo spots last year he says on the duet you not he taps the table then bringing his thick eyebrows together and pursing his lips he leans down and taps the ground you not again I think my pai is here now you say unnecessarily as the pie is quite visibly placed in front of you you did not order invisible pie you hate invisible pa ay he looks at the pies for a long time and then lets his breath he sae out slowly through his nose is all new pre do it sneeze or doggie Nipomo good beliefs what an asshole that guy it's you finish the pie and ask for the check check his use a whispering it into your drinking glass as is custom and then lifting the tray of sugar packets to find it filled out and ready to be paid you drop a few dollars on to the check place it back under the sugars wait for the sound of swallowing and leave the diner waitress nods as you leave but not at you she nods slowly and rhythmically to music only she can hear her on his writing the curved line of neon lights above the menu as you start the car the man on the radio says something about the weather and in the the the the in the The The The The The The The The Day The fate of the time the into the air just up on show in the neck hurt so bad this month also assess the tone the local The The will the uh the the the the sun shone the the the the the the know but it's more the the vocal the the the the The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The than local honey the the debt the speeders the vocal on the the the crate is in your kitchen where you left it and you get down to embrace it more fully it has grown warmer even hot it still is not taking it taken you know time to get back home now that you think about it were there any other cars on the road where did all the cars go the man with the sum of four flags explaining the speed limit he wasn't there on either your heart pounds without allowing another stray thought to wander through your mind and delay you you grab the crate and throw it in your trunk you turn the ignition and your car radio comes alive with the puck just as the announcer says that your car radio comes alive with the pop where to now you don't know but you go there anyway a pair of headlights a pair of aunties and two shaky hands speeding through the silent town behind you you see helicopter search light sweeping down onto your trailer there are sirens a purple ish cloud hangs over the town glittering occasionally as it rotates the whole works you drive past the moonlight all night still aglow and full of people slowly eating what sounds good only late at night and Teddy Williams Desert Flower bowling alley and arcade fun complex which is taken to not only blocking but Derek aiding its doors at closing time you pass by City Hall which as always is completely shrouded after dark in black velvet moving farther out following the pull of the distant uncertain mood you pass by the car locked where the sales men have been put away for the night and old woman Josie's house were the only sign that the unassuming little home could be a place of residence for Angels is the bright Halo of Heavenly lights surrounding it and the sign out front that says Angels residents and the town is behind you and your out in the scrub lands and the sand wastes by the road you see a man holding a cactus in one hand and a pair of scissors and the other he shakes both that you as you pass and how all this and then you are low just you and that desert you stop the car and get out pebbles crunch in the sand in response to your movement the radio murmurs behind closed doors of the car headlights illuminated only a few stray plants and the wide dome eyes of some nocturnal animal looking back you see the bulge of light that is your night fail the purple cloud now floating over the heart of the city reaches its tendrils in and out of buildings you hear screams and gunfire you open the trunk and lay one hand on the crate it pulses with some kind of life still no ticking though you look back several buildings are on fire crowds of people are floating in the air held aloft by beams of light and struggling feeble e against power they cannot begin to understand the ground or shifts like it was startled it's so quiet when it finally comes when you see the black car before it arrives no it comes to a whole nearby and two mins step out you don't run the neither today how did you find to be the you ask the everything you do is being broadcast on the radio for some reason that made it pretty easy says one of them at the one that isn't all that you say I see that now you have the item the man who was not tall masts you say nothing the man who was not tall signals the man who was not short and he walks past you looks into your trunk and not even easier says the not all there is an unexpected click one of the rear doors of the black or has opened and your fiance has stepped out eyes are wet like it was the night you left she does not appear to have aged but then you can't actually remember how long it has been could have been last week or was it ten years ago I She sets y y you don't know what to say the man who is not short steps up to you puts a knife against your throat nobody says anything your fiance shakes her head her eyes are empty broken gushing the radio was saying all of this as it happens you hear it dimly through the car door you can't stop smiling all at once the consequence is all that once you are free it's all coming back around all left wants life bleary washed out snaps back into focus the red light on the tower still blinks in the distance and every message in this world has a meaning it all makes sense and you are finally being punished you can think of a time you have ever been happier your fiance abruptly gets back into the car neither of the men seem to notice her one opens the crate with a couple quick taps and pulls out of it and intricate miniature house the hours that must have been spent building every detail is accounted for inside the house you think you see for a moment lights and movement undamaged says the man who is not all UB met him the knife presses harder against your throat but it doesn't hurt your eyes wander up and you see above you the dark planet of awesome size perched in the sun lists void and invisible tighten all thick black forests and jagged mountains and deep turbulent oceans of a monster spinning sound less forgotten it's close you see it just above you the baby even if you tried very hard you could touch it you reach up and The The The The this has been your story the radio moves on to other things news traffic political opinions and corrections to political opinions but there was time one day ones single day in which it was only one story a story about you and you were pleased because you always wanted to hear about yourself on the radio the Good nite nite failed night the the production of Night Help resents it is written by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey trainer and produced by Joseph and the voice of Night Vale Cecil Baldwin original music by distillation of that can be found at destruction dot info registration got band camp dot com Russian translation by Daniel Muir ski spicy but Daniel this episodes weather was local honey by Al rates find out more at our rigs that dot band camp dot com comments questions email us at info at Welcome to Night Vale dot com or follow us on Twitter at night Del Rio check out Welcome to Night Vale dot com for more information on this show as well as all sorts of cool Night Vale stuff you can while you're there consider clicking the donate link that be cool with you today's proverb summer and fall feeling sort of but not quite sick all the time spring in The