I've been feeling trapped in a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde situation. And I want to be there for Dr. Jekyll, I want to help them. And maybe my idea of help is different from theirs, so there's that. There is also Mr. Hyde, and my reaction is to stay away, to not allow myself to be vulnerable because I'm afraid to be hurt. 

So I'm trying to reach a middle point between a certain feeling of duty towards family and love but also asking for accountability and keeping myself safe. I've felt somewhat in control of myself during my life but when it comes to others there is way less anything to say or do to get them to say or do one thing or the other. So maybe the answer is to stay still, to not go away but to not go in. Just stay here, available, open.