Lords:

• John


• Kevin
  
  
  
  
  • https://www.youtube.com/@kevin_hainline
  
  

Topics:

• Asking for help / Dealing with the slightest criticism/suggestions/etc


• Roger Rabbit and Marvel vs. Capcom were big deals. How long until multiverse & crossover shit is exciting again?


• Update on media that makes me feel things vs. media that doesn't


• "Bell's Theorem"", a poem that I wrote, and then, at a poetry reading someone suggested the next poem and it demonstrated how good poets are pretty amazing and I am not a good poet
  
  
  
  
  • https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CkNH-KlDCAMRNsI6hDZjlyvOpAgM2TsP8x-lIp5TeqQ/edit?usp=sharing
  
  


• We're in a golden age of new official localizations and rereleases of old games (and why am I not playing them?!)

Microtopics:

• Some guy on the internet.


• Transparent aluminum ukuleles.


• Hurting your fingers because your ukulele action is too high.


• Do you still call them cowboy chords when you play them on a ukulele?


• An astronomer making a series of Youtube videos about Jurassic Park.


• The history of Mr. DNA.


• How much kids in the early 90s loved Jamaicans.


• Solving a 30 year old Internet mystery.


• Suing Michael Crichton to make him put you in the Jurassic Park acknowledgements section.


• The Ancient DNA Study Group.


• Ian Malcolm just saying a bunch of lines from James Gleick's "Chaos."


• Going into slow motion to show all the Victorian era pickpocketing.


• Asking an august astronomer to critique your work and squirming as he critiques your work.


• Therapy-style processing via Topic Lords.


• People who like being asked for help because it gives them an opportunity to help.


• The German word for being a person.


• Being so overly polite that people feel obligated to reassure you that you don't need to be so polite, which is a big pain.


• After someone helps you, asking for clarification on whether they wanted to help or if they felt obligated.


• How to save Jim a lot of time and effort.


• Two people coming from the same gross Internet soup. (Not 4chan)


• The friends you made on the Pokey the Penguin mailing list.


• Swearing to kids these days that the internet was good once.


• Finding the exact right gif for your animated profile picture.


• Pretend socialization: it's still socialization.


• Knowing a guy by his Internet handle for decades and suddenly having to call him his birth name.


• When crossovers started being a thing.


• The Supreme Court ruling that corporations are people, saying the stage for the world depicted in Bio Freaks for the N64.


• Daffy and Donald playing rival pianos.


• Detective Munch's cameo in Fortnite.


• Konami Wai Wai World.


• Vib Ribbon n Astro Bot.


• Why am I on this show when I could be playing Vib Ribbon?


• Burning episodes of Topic Lords to CD-R so you can play them in Vib Ribbon.


• Extremely pixelated vector art.


• The save the cat moment on Topic Lords.


• Mind-blowing crossover media events where the mind-blowing part is how much they paid all the lawyers to negotiate the deal.


• Why the indie game scene hadn't produced a League of Extraordinary Gentlemen with public domain characters like Robin Hood, Santa Claus, Mickey Mouse and Abraham Lincoln.


• Reagan-Gorbachev.


• Which president was kidnapped by ninjas.


• Choosing to let the ninjas keep Ronald Reagan.


• Ape Out: Get Back In There!


• Pushing the left stick to lean and pushing the triggers to lift either foot.


• Trying to play a video game in which you dislike the protagonist.


• A guy whose defining trait is that he tries to get out of every conversation as quickly as possible.


• Playing with the mismatch between what the player wants and what the player character wants.


• Upsetting the apple cart of how video games work.


• A minimap that takes up the top fifth of the screen but is nonfunctional until you unlock it halfway through the game.


• Which Jurassic Park video game is most interesting and which is most fun.


• Looking down at your cleavage to see your health meter.


• Saying the secret word and screaming real loud.


• A poem based on a physics thing.


• Forgetting your ex girlfriend's face, along with all the state capitals.


• Time pointing an arrow at your back, and you walk.


• The New Physicality of Long-Distance Love.


• Sending a poet up on the spaceship to drain buckets from downtown.


• A poem written sometime between 1936 and 1992.


• Off-Topic Lords, a place for people who shout answers at podcasts in grocery stores.


• A collection of Double Dragon and Kunio-kun games.


• Kid Dracula.


• Mother 3's copyright nightmare.


• Mario Paint on the Switch 2.


• Who was the Terry that Chris Houlihan replaced in Nintendo World Cup?


• Satellaview games ported to the Switch.


• Batman Loves Him a Parallelogram.


• Joining the discord for the best PicoSteveMo experience.


• KevinHainlineOnYoutube.com


• Naming a distant galaxy after yourself and other astronomers mocking you mercilessly.

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