How to Support the Rob Skinner Podcast.  If you would like to help support my mission to multiply disciples, leaders and churches, click here:  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/robskinner

 

 

Transcript for How to Become a Loving Person

Pam and I just moved to Boston from Tucson, Arizona.  We lived there for 13 years.  We planted the church there and created so many memories.  The last month we were there, we were busy packing up and saying goodbye to people.  It's hard to condense thirteen years into a few goodbyes.  You know what was most important to Pam and me?  Knowing that I loved the people there and that they loved me.  When I heard people share how I had helped them and loved them, that's all that mattered.  There were many things people shared that I had forgotten about.  They were often small things, but they were big to those people.  Coming here I decided to have a simple focus, to love.  That's the goal.

What's your goal? 

·       Make friends?

·       Find a romantic relationship

·       Make a difference?

It's easy to remain unconnected with people even when you are surrounded by them.  Let's figure out how to grow in love:

Let's read 1 Timothy 1:3-6

³ As I urged you when I went into Macedonia, stay there in Ephesus so that you may command certain people not to teach false doctrines any longer ⁴ or to devote themselves to myths and endless genealogies. Such things promote controversial speculations rather than advancing God's work—which is by faith. ⁵ The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. ⁶ Some have departed from these and have turned to meaningless talk. 

Paul is advising Timothy how to lead the church in Ephesus.  He tells him to command people to stop wasting time with empty words, false doctrine, gossip and backbiting.  He says the goal of this command is love.  Love provides the environment that advances God's work.  If you've ever been in a dysfunctional family or church, you know how God's work gets sidelined when love takes a backseat to controversy.

Love is too general of a goal to approach directly.  It really has to be broken down.  How do you become a more loving person?  How do you experience more love in your heart?  How do you change and grow into a person who is surrounded by loving people?

Paul explains that love is like a tree that grows when it's in the soil of a pure heart, good conscience and a sincere faith.  Let's break that down:

·       Love Comes From A Pure Heart

Proverbs 4:23-27, Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it.
²⁴ Keep your mouth free of perversity;
    keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
²⁵ Let your eyes look straight ahead;
    fix your gaze directly before you.
²⁶ Give careful thought to the^[c] paths for your feet
    and be steadfast in all your ways.
²⁷ Do not turn to the right or the left;
    keep your foot from evil.

The Bible says guard your heart because everything you do flows from it.  When you allow poison into your heart, it kills the love that wants to grow there.

The first way to keep your heart pure is to watch what you say.  Keep your words positive, faithful and upbuilding.  Paul was pointing out the "meaningless talk" and empty words of the Christians. 

How are you doing in what you say?  Are you loving people with your words or tearing them down?

One decision Pam and I made before we left Tucson was that we were going to encourage every person specifically who came to church. We spent several midweek services praising and thanking every member and person who was attending.  There were people in the audience who we had conflicts with.  There were a few people who we had funny feelings toward and they felt the same toward us.  But we decided to only praise and encourage.  It was amazing.  My feelings for those people changed and when they had a farewell party for us, they were so loving and kind.

Take a minute to say something positive about the next person you run into.  Whether you are at work, the gym, in class or at home, deliberately take a second to say something encouraging to the next person you bump into.  It can be as simple as "I like your shirt" or "I'm glad you're here" but make a decision to use your words for good if you want to have a pure heart.

The second way to develop a pure heart is to ²⁵ Let your eyes look straight ahead;
    fix your gaze directly before you.

Be careful what you are looking at.  It's hard to be loving when you have no boundaries for what you allow your eyes to see.

·       Shopping

<span style="font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 11