5 Co-Parenting Hacks for Raising Healthy, Happy Children with a Difficult Ex
Don't make your children feel like pawns, messengers, or casualties of your divorce!
In a perfect world, after divorce, your children would only know that life is more peaceful with two homes, and that they miss the way things used to be with both parents in the home. (Of course, if there was a lot of tension, bickering, and anger, they won't miss that at all!)
When you co-parent well, you eliminate exposing the children to adult issues. Right? I sure hope you said "Yes!"
Children have enough upset to content with when parents separate. It's enough to deal with moving, losing time with their friends, missing the non-custodial parent, feeling uncertain about what's going on, and not have the right things in the right house at the right time. These are kid concerns!
FIVE GOAL/AFFIRMATIONS TO KEEP TOP-OF-MIND WHEN CO-PARENTING:
- I am the model I want my children to follow. Therefore, everything I do and say demonstrates who I want my children to strive towards becoming.
- I communicate with my ex in the way I wish for him/her to communicate with me. I choose collaboration and conversation, over conflict and acrimony. (Listen to today's episode for how this works with #Hijackals!)
- I focus on my children and what keeps them healthy--physically, mentally, and emotionally. That includes doing what is in their best interests first.
- I turn my attention from what I don't like about my ex to what s/he does well for the children. It's about the kids, not what my personal issues are with my ex.
- I allow my children to enjoy their childhoods and ensure they're only concerned with age-appropriate thoughts, feelings and actions. I protect them from being pawns, messengers, or casualties of my divorce.
Now, those are just for you. A #Hijackal ex may make them VERY difficult, and I've talked about this in today's episode, at length.
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You deserve to create a life that is calm, peaceful, creative, and productive. A #Hijackal wants to be sure that you do not.
No emotional safety when you're in a relationship with a Hijackal!
Today's episode offers insights into the crazy-making minds of narcissists, narcissistic #Hijackals, anti-social people, and drama queens...and, of course, drama kings.
Listen to today's episode, and, if by chance, you're still wondering if you have had a #Hijackal in your life, grab my
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HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:
- Why you must keep the best interests of the children top of mind
- Goal Affirmations for you (see above)
- Value of communicating with your children in age-appropriate ways only
- Why not to discuss divorce difficulties with your children that only belong between you and your ex
If you need help with any part of the journey with--and from--a #Hijackal, I'm here for you. Let's talk soon. Want my help? I make it easy and accessible for you to have your first one-hour session with me for only $97.
Make positive changes NOW.
Rhoberta Shaler, PhD,
The Relationship Help Doctor
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