75 - Through the Narrow Place
It's time for Night Vale's annual marathon. Plus, economic turmoil in Desert Bluffs, horoscopes, and another edition of 'Hey There, Cecil.'
Weather: 'Black Eyes' by David Wirsig (davidwirsig.bandcamp.com)
Night Vale Tour Dates, Books & More: welcometonightvale.com.
Music: Disparition, disparition.info.
Logo: Rob Wilson, robwilsonwork.com.
Following script is auto-generated by Speech to Text Technology:
it's not the destination it's the endless exhausting journey well got to the night The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The The an exciting day for amateur athletes or just anyone who enjoys moving their body for whatever reason someone would want to do that today is the annual through the narrow place this yearly marathon is a family friendly charity race that takes people on a beautiful twenty six mile or so of course along the crooked path down into the deepening and ultimately through the narrow place race organizers say that this will be the biggest marathon get all the town forced to take part by the terrifying heart pictures of the distant prints and that all participants will be devoured by the Nehru Place Race board president Susan will men added a lot more dramatic than eighty is the sorry you know how when you talk mostly with a small group of friends you end up developing a shared way of speaking that can be misleading or mis understood when heard by outside ears we just like to say that the narrow place will devour them because what will happen is that the narrow place will consume them with an unfeeling hunger and that will dissipate Susan laughed continuing there it is again that sound so frightening when I say it that way doesn't it doesn't it sound frightening she laughed Susan laughed she laughed her mouth was black and feature lists inside she laughed the marathon is this afternoon and will be the end of us all more on this soon but first let's get into some news the desert Bluffs City Council and desert Bluffs Mayor Dan cargos o announced this week via a golden press release hidden in one lucky soul for crunch candy bar that due to an extreme deficit in municipal funding they would have to shut down certain city services including trash pickup road maintenance entry monitoring starting this Monday citizens will have to drive their own trash to the dump roads will gradually start to deteriorate under the erosion of particulate desert wind and the movements of trees will go entirely un watched and recorded the city council and mayor cargos o indicated that they had done everything in their power to prevent this shutdown including requesting federal assistance selling off city property and making offerings of food and wine to the ancient sandstone idols out in the dunes but that the catastrophic loss of employment and tax dollars after strokes were shut down operations in town were too much for even those measures to make up for stress corpse interests and of course was the former employer of every single person in desert Bluffs until the company's rapid expansion plans into nearby towns led to their downfall and subsequent hostile takeover by beings who are definitely not angels the Not at All Angels closed down almost every track's office and laid off or as they put it liberated old former strikes employees and at this point are mostly liquidating strengths resources in order to find operas here in Night Vale listeners I feel for desert blocks in their time of need mostly I feel scorned and try out more on this never as I don't ever want to talk about desert plus again and now a much more important story check the cat floating exactly four feet off the ground in the men's room here at the station we've received all sorts of coals and e mails and distress signals and emergency players and Morse code spelling out help us help us we have been here for weeks God save our souls which I can only assume are all signs of the public's insatiable desire to hear more cute kitty news and what cute kitty news we have co SEC is reaching that tiny caps line with his skull is completely visible and I've been taking a adorable photo after adorable photo and putting them on snap chat with captions like news a good kitty and He holds my skull of terror whenever I get stressed at work I just put on protective gear and inject myself with a number of preemptive anti toxins and I go pet cautioned for a bit and listen to the low gurgling rumble of his her kittens are doing as well as their daddy and some of them are getting nearly as big as Kah SEC was when I first found out my favorite of the kittens is named a mixtape and his anterior spines are coming in fast he's going to be a really big kitten when he's fully grown unmanageable the huge always will be adorable that's about it for cat news if there's any more cat news like Shaq doing something cute or just looking cute in any way we will immediately break into whatever ongoing news story it is that we're reporting and let you know all right let's do another round of my popular advice segment hey there Cecil hey there Cecil my husband and I have that and we're wondering if you could settle it I think that this guy is made of gas and distance while he thinks that this guy is hastily painted plywood about thirty feet above the ground built to hide us from the terrible truth of what is actually above us that's unrelated to the bat which is which of us wears the summoning cloak better pictures attached signed in secure some owners in cactus bloom A they're insecure or oh wow okay I'd say it's a dead tie it's almost impossible to look bad in a summoning cloak but more importantly instead of arguing about who looks better in a cloak You should appreciate how you each interact with the cloak in your own unique way cherish each other celebrate you're summoning cloak styles and save your arguments for that difficult and unsettling matter about this guy hey there see sold my teenage son like many children his age can't decide what kind of person he is for instance sometimes he is a cattle and sometimes he is a bear and sometimes he is a puddle of water many of these forms are difficult to drive to school and I especially worry about his safety when he takes the form back why no flying outside I always tell him but he worries that he doesn't listen what can I do to help my son through this difficult time scientists worried mom in downtown they're worried you would think that we would all be able to easily understand a teenager's struggle most of us having been teenagers at one point except obviously those of us to age backwards but outside of the context of a young mind that teenage experience does not have the same immediate painful urgency that it does for those who were currently living through it it sounds like your son is trying on new physical forms to see which ones work for him maybe he's just searching for a physical form that other kids at school will think is cool whatever the issue support him have sympathy for him and most of all keep him safe from others and from himself it's his job to make bad decisions it's your job to make sure they're not bad enough to cause real damage good luck last letter be there Cecil I have made a terrible mistake and it consumes me in my life was once a life and now it is an incorruptible her rifle wakes each day and feeds it gives and takes and it takes and it takes and would cry but I don't think there's enough but we left the board to make tears what do I do what do I do signed terrified in sch ambling forfeit their terrified it's important to be able to forgive yourself for mistakes even real doc's just do your best to make things right and move on I say although your mistake sounds well it does sound terrifying I hope to hear nothing more about it that's all the time we have today for Hey there Cecil keep your calls and letters and psychic please coming in listeners it looks like the marathon through the narrow place is almost ready to go everyone in town is gathering at the starting line with the help of the towering a harbinger of the distant prints were using their toothy beaks and meaningful glances from their stomach ties to indicate where people should stand looking to be a fun race and everyone is weeping Larry Leroy out on the edge of town playfully tried to hide but the harbinger is beat him at his own game and the fun continued when they dragged him screaming to the starting line even the City Council is in on the festivities their ghastly powers being no match for the Placid unyielding might of the harbinger is I'm here to don't think old Cecil is exempt me and Carlos are right here in matching lycra shorts he's wearing his running lab coat and the harbinger zz allowed me to bring the mobile broadcasting equipment so I can continue to do this radio show even though everyone can hear me talking live because I'm right here with them oh and there's Mayor Dana Cardinal inaugurated the race by nervously chewing on a fist full of terror it won't be long now before we are all surging forward panicked the harbinger is looming behind us until we are all forced through the narrow place what good exercise that will be but while we wait let's have a message from our sponsors today's sponsor is that gut feeling that you did something wrong but you can't think of what it could be what was it you feel so guilty but your guilt has no target its circles and circles but cannot land you think back through the day trying to find the source of the gnawing guilt but there is nothing and you realize that there never was a specific cause it's just a part of you you all are the guilt you all are the shame and this only makes you feel more guilty more ashamed that these emotions are somehow tied into your very being as Albert Einstein famously said after he died the call is coming from inside the house that gut feeling that you did something wrong but you can't think about what it could be try it today and tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow this has been a word from our sponsors finally on I think we should just have time for this week's horoscopes before the race Virgo You should check under your bed before you go to sleep that way the thing hiding in your closet will think you haven't realized where it is yet Libra all our eyes are on you rose give them back Scorpio Mars is intersecting with mercury which means your head is weirdly be for your body and no one wants to tell you because they don't want you to have the grace of self awareness Scorpio those subject areas you worry too much about earthquakes and plane crashes you're going to die of heart disease or cancer just like everybody else Capricorn stop throwing away on expensive cars and nice clothes the owners of those cars in outfits do not appreciate the crumpled dollar bills you keep throwing on them and anyway if you want to throw something away that's what garbage cans are for Aquarius you've been so stressed lately why not just sit outside tonight relax look up but the stars and know basically nothing about the world you live in Pisces Scorpions are not as dangerous as everyone thinks tried to concentrate on that it'll help you feel a little calmer tomorrow Aries I know this is a hard time for you Aries remember tis better to have loved and lost it's really great just the best Taurus step on a crack break your mother's back pick up the phone or break your mother's tail bone take your coffee with cream or break your mother's Beamer the wizard spell has gone terribly wrong and you must not move at all until it is reversed Gemini You Will Meet a tall handsome stranger he will introduce himself you will come to know and he will know you well he will grow older his skin will SAG and the Inn he will no longer be handsome he will no longer be a stranger he will no longer be most of the things he wants wants he will be a close friend an old friend one you've known for years and with whom you are settling down into that final stretch of life but he will always be tall so tall very very tall cancer I'm not saying this is bad news but the stars just say the mean maybe that's a good sign right right to vary in exact science Leo Today is your lucky day which is good news because tonight is your unlucky night but enjoyed this lucky day until the sun goes down until the very second the sun goes down and then and than it has been this week's horoscopes oh and here we go there the starting guns pointing at all of us ready to fire in case we decide not to run looks like the race has begun well everyone if we in depth devoured by the narrow place than at least we went out with one last bond of family friendly community event in any case while we all get moving let's get the latest on the weather though the the the the er the slack at uh the hope that won't come the The The The The The or the the The day we went a little crooked path down only into the deeper dating and then we whether we wanted to or not we went through the narrow place we went through and onto the other side there is no other sigh we went there we sent messages in Morse code to the people we once had been asking for help but they could not help us they were outside of the narrow place the distant Prince was playing he gathered his harbinger is to hear him for the celebration date the and merged in and out with each other taking start early for us we screw day who the we wore black coats and had never existed to the distant prints for a Golden CO and have always existed old darkness he's just a thickness of the arts there is bustling in every shadow every surface is but we wore black coats and we went to Rue what yet we went through a narrow place though he was another great marathon I'm glad that our city government continues to encourage physical activity with fun events like this and I'm proud of all of us for taking part we will never be the same again but here's a little secret for you no one is ever the same pain again after any day you are never the same twice and much of your unhappiness comes from trying to pretend that you all are except that you are different each day and do so joyfully recognizing it for the gift it is work within the desires and goals of the person you are currently until you aren't that person anymore and everything changes once again stay tuned next for eight different you and that different you and it different you again each new denying their multiple nature and from the narrow place where we wear black coats and have never existed good Night Night Vale goodnight the the night they let the production of Night helper sense it is written by Joseph H and Jeffrey trainer and produced by Joseph and the voice of night Val is Cecil Baldwin original music by distortion all of the can be found at disposition dot info right description got band camp dot com This episodes weather was Black Ice by David were saying find out more at David we're seeing doc band camp dot com That's W I R S I G comments questions email us at info at Welcome to Night Vale dot com or follow us on Twitter at night Bill radio check out Welcome to Night Vale dot com for more information on this show as well as all sorts of cool night they'll stuff you can own and while you're there consider clicking the donate link because of you today's proverb Drake would like to add you to 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