Dads Hurt Too — Miscarriage, Masculinity & the Gospel with Eric Schumacher
Description
What does it mean for a man to grieve the loss of a child through miscarriage? In this vulnerable and raw conversation, returning guest Eric Schumacher joins Ken Freire to talk about something most men never speak of out loud: miscarriage from the father’s perspective.
Eric opens up about losing four children through miscarriage and how it challenged his identity, faith, and masculinity. Together, they explore how Christian men often bury their grief, avoid weakness, and wrongly carry shame over losses they can’t explain or fix.
This episode is a powerful reminder: grieving as a man isn’t weakness — it’s worship.
📍 TIMESTAMPS
00:00 – Ken welcomes back Eric Schumacher 00:25 – Reflecting on The Good Gift of Weakness01:00 – Why Eric wrote Dads Hurt Too: A Father’s Memoir of Miscarriage02:45 – The origin of the original essay & unexpected response from men 04:20 – Why a short, narrative book was needed for grieving dads 05:06 – “You’re a dad”: Validating the father's grief 05:37 – Why men don’t talk about miscarriage 07:00 – Fix-it mode: The trap for grieving husbands 08:47 – Your grief is not a distraction — it’s a way to love your wife 09:16 – Ken on compartmentalizing pain and fear of breaking down 10:07 – Why men resist weakness — and how Jesus meets us there 11:44 – Shame in miscarriage: “I couldn’t protect my family” 13:34 – The mental spiral of “what if” and the illusion of control 14:14 – Ken shares his own miscarriage story 15:03 – The death of dreams and future hopes 16:53 – Grief delayed: When the due date hits 17:56 – Say something: Breaking the silence after loss 19:08 – The shame of not sharing early pregnancy news 21:01 – Why mourning publicly matters 22:30 – Ken’s honest confession: “I’ll never know if it was a son or daughter” 23:34 – Why stuffing grief doesn't work — and the better way forward 23:45 – Gospel hope for grieving fathers 25:09 – Jesus is not a stoic: A Savior who wept and felt anger at death 26:58 – Jesus understands weakness, failure, and being let down 28:04 – Shame wants to isolate you; Jesus wants to comfort you 29:22 – Ken: “God understands. He lost a Son too.” 30:23 – Trust in the God who will not fail you 30:58 – Eric’s final encouragement: Mark the dates, remember the loss 32:18 – Honor the life in ways that help you grieve 33:56 – “Grief is a way of loving what’s lost.” 34:40 – How men can reach Eric for support 35:24 – Ken closes the episode: Kill shame, stand strong in Christ, live on mission
📘 Resources Mentioned:
- Dads Hurt Too: A Father’s Memoir of Miscarriage by Eric Schumacher
- The Good Gift of Weakness by Eric Schumacher
- Gospel Care Collective: https://gospelcarecollective.org
📱 Connect with Eric Schumacher:Instagram, Twitter, or through ericshumacher.com (Full links in the show notes)





