Love Bites is a weekly segment on The South Shore’s Morning News with lifestyle coach Francesca Luca. You can listen for advice every Wednesday morning at 9:10 . The Francesca Luca Show airs every Wednesday evening between 8 and 9pm.

Dating App Burnout Is Real But It Doesn’t Have to Be Your Reality

You’ve heard it before and maybe even said it yourself:

Dating apps suck.

But here’s the truth: What you think about, you bring about.

If you keep saying the apps are trash, guess what they’ll feel like? Trash.

That said… let’s not pretend dating app burnout isn’t real.

Because oh, it is. Loudly. And for good reason.

Too Many Choices Are Killing Effort

When it feels like there’s always someone better just one swipe away, why invest energy in the person right in front of you?

Abundance can create apathy. And that apathy is showing up everywhere, half-baked convos, lazy replies, and no actual follow-through.

People Aren’t Always Dating With Intention

Let’s be honest:

Some people are on apps because they’re bored.

Some are looking for a hookup.

Some just want attention.

And some? They genuinely have no idea what they’re looking for.

The result? A sea of mixed signals, ghosting, and “good morning” texts that somehow feel like winning the lottery (when they really shouldn’t).

Real Connection Takes Something Most Are Afraid to Give: Effort

In a world full of “whatchadoing” and disappearing acts, effort is sexy.

Someone who replies thoughtfully, asks questions, and actually plans a date?

That’s not just rare, it’s a unicorn.

Vulnerability Is the Missing Piece

Apps make it easy to stay surface-level. There’s no tone. No eye contact. No real emotional risk.

But also? No real connection.

Because what does connection actually require?

Being brave enough to show up, even if it means you might not be chosen.

Most People Are Scared to Show Up

It’s not that people don’t want to try. It’s that trying feels dangerous now.

Fear of rejection.

Fear of wasting time.

Fear of caring more than the other person.

So what do people do instead?

Hide behind sarcasm, detachment, or worse, ghosting.

So What Can You Do?

Here’s your real-world dating app survival guide minus the fluff:

1. Swipe With Clarity, Not Boredom

Don’t scroll just to scroll. Know what you want and be bold enough to say it. Mixed intentions lead to mixed results.

2. Vet Faster. Meet Sooner. Exit Quicker.

No more small talk purgatory. No pen pals, PAAAAALEASE!!!!!

Video chat or meet (safely) within a week.

If it fizzles, let it. Next.

3. Upgrade Your Profile Vibe

• Your bio is not your body. Add personality, not just pics. LIMIT THE DOG PHOTOS!


• No more “If you can’t handle me at my worst…” energy. Say what you're into, what lights you up.


• Ask a friend to review your profile. Seriously. They know your vibe better than you think.

4. Stop Fishing With the Same Bait

Tired of dating the same type? Change your type.

Your swipes reflect your vibe not the app. If you're exhausted, maybe it's your energy, not your algorithm.

5. Filter Out the Flakes

If they’re dry in the chat, they’ll be dull on the date.

If they can’t form a sentence or ask you a real question? Keep it moving.

6. Red Flags Aren’t Pink

If someone says, ‘I’m not looking for anything serious’,  believe them.”

Don’t try to decode unclear signals. Attention isn’t connection. Intention is.

Final Thought: Real People. Real Eye Contact. Real Life.

Your dating life doesn’t live inside a screen.

Log off sometimes.

Meet people where the Wi-Fi’s weak and the eye contact is strong.

Because at the end of the day?

You’re not looking for a swipe.

You’re looking for a spark.