Digest

This podcast delves into the world of mall security through the eyes of Gus Parsons, a former mall cop who served for 10 years. The episode begins with the host announcing upcoming tour dates and then introduces Gus, who shares his experiences, stories, and insights into the world of mall security. Gus explains how he became a mall cop, initially seeing it as an easy job but quickly realizing its complexities. He discusses the minimal training involved and the evolution of mall security over the years. Gus details common crimes he encountered, including shoplifting, vandalism, and occasional fights, highlighting the diverse range of people involved. He reflects on the changing landscape of the mall, noting the decline in its social significance and the shift towards a more transactional experience. Gus reminisces about the days when malls were bustling hubs for socializing and entertainment, sharing his memories of popular stores like the Disney store, Sharper Image, and Hot Topic. He also delves into the topic of ethnic stereotypes and their connection to shopping habits at the mall, sparking a discussion about cultural preferences and shopping patterns. The conversation shifts to the security guard's experiences with mall security cameras, sharing stories about witnessing a guard and a Cinebon employee engaging in sexual activity in the parking lot, catching a couple having sex in a dressing room, and confronting a man who was sniffing underwear in Victoria's Secret. They discuss the challenges of dealing with theft, managing crowds, and confronting difficult patrons. The conversation explores the phenomenon of "mall stocking," where security guards would follow attractive women around the mall, and the rivalry between mall cops from different malls. The security guard shares experiences with lost children and attempted kidnappings, emphasizing the importance of parental supervision and the need to be aware of surroundings. The episode concludes with a discussion about the food court, including the security guard's favorite food court restaurants and the impact of McDonald's on the food court business.

Outlines

00:00:00

Mall Security: A Former Cop's Stories

This episode explores the world of mall security through the experiences of Gus Parsons, a former mall cop who shares stories about common crimes, changing mall culture, and memorable encounters with patrons.

00:00:37

Introducing Mall Cop Gus Parsons

The host introduces Gus Parsons, a former mall cop who served for 10 years. The episode will delve into his experiences, stories, and insights into the world of mall security.

00:01:34

Gus's Journey into Mall Coppin'

Gus shares how he ended up becoming a mall cop, explaining that it was a job he initially saw as easy but quickly realized was anything but. He discusses the minimal training involved and the evolution of mall security over the years.

00:33:27

Common Crimes and Changing Mall Culture

Gus details the most prevalent crimes he encountered as a mall cop, including shoplifting, vandalism, and occasional fights. He highlights the diverse range of people who engage in these activities, from mothers to groups of elderly women. Gus reflects on how the mall has changed over time, noting the decline in its social significance and the shift towards a more transactional experience. He reminisces about the days when malls were bustling hubs for socializing and entertainment.

00:42:22

Mall Stores of the Past and Present

Gus shares his memories of the Disney store, highlighting its popularity among children and adults alike. He describes the store's atmosphere, merchandise, and the nostalgic feeling it evokes. Gus discusses the Sharper Image store, known for its innovative and often bizarre gadgets. He recalls the store's appeal and the desire it instilled in customers to own its unique products, even if they were impractical. Gus reminisces about the Hot Topic store, a haven for emo and alternative culture. He describes the store's atmosphere, the types of customers it attracted, and the impact it had on youth culture.

00:46:57

Ethnic Stereotypes and Mall Shopping Habits

Gus delves into the topic of ethnic stereotypes and their connection to shopping habits at the mall. He shares his observations about the stores frequented by different ethnic groups, sparking a discussion about cultural preferences and shopping patterns.

00:51:04

Mall Security Camera Stories

The conversation shifts to the security guard's experiences with mall security cameras. They share a story about witnessing a guard and a Cinebon employee engaging in sexual activity in the parking lot. They also share stories about catching couples having sex in dressing rooms and confronting a man who was sniffing underwear in Victoria's Secret.

00:54:48

Challenges of Mall Security

The conversation focuses on the challenges of dealing with theft in the mall. The security guard describes how they handle shoplifters, including the difficulties of confronting them and the need to protect other shoppers. They also discuss the challenges of managing crowds and confronting difficult patrons.

01:02:26

Mall Protests and the Decline of Malls

The security guard recounts an experience with a protest at the Louis Vuitton store. They describe the protesters' tactics, their own frustration, and the challenges of maintaining order during such events. The conversation shifts to the decline of malls and the factors contributing to it. They discuss the impact of online shopping, the importance of movie theaters, and the rise of phone stores and magic shops in empty mall spaces.

01:08:53

Black Friday Mayhem and Mall Stocking

The conversation focuses on the security guard's experiences with Black Friday. They describe the chaos, the fights, and the challenges of managing crowds during the holiday shopping frenzy. The conversation explores the phenomenon of "mall stocking," where security guards would follow attractive women around the mall, often with the intention of flirting or engaging in sexual activity. They discuss the perks of being a mall cop, including the ability to get free food and sneak into the movie theater.

01:23:59

Mall Cop Rivalries and Lost Children

The conversation focuses on the rivalry between mall cops from different malls. They discuss the territoriality of mall cops and the potential for conflict between them. The conversation shifts to the security guard's experiences with lost children and attempted kidnappings. They discuss the challenges of dealing with lost kids, the importance of parental supervision, and the potential for danger in crowded malls.

01:28:39

Food Court Memories and Conclusion

The conversation concludes with a discussion about the food court, including the security guard's favorite food court restaurants and the impact of McDonald's on the food court business.

Keywords

Q&A

• What was the most memorable incident you had as a mall cop?

  Gus recounts apprehending a "clone thief" who was stealing cologne samples. He describes the thrill of the chase and the satisfaction of catching the perpetrator.

• How has the role of a mall cop changed over time?

  Gus explains that mall security has become more restrictive, with limitations on physical intervention and a greater emphasis on observation and reporting. He contrasts this with the more hands-on approach of the past.

• What are some of the stereotypes associated with different ethnic groups and their shopping habits at the mall?

  Gus discusses the common perception of certain ethnic groups frequenting specific stores, such as Mexicans at Seas Candy and Asian families at high-end stores. He acknowledges the potential for bias in these observations but also highlights the cultural factors that may influence shopping preferences.

• What are some of the most popular mall stores from the past?

  Some popular mall stores from the past include Hot Topic, Structure, and Millers Outposts. These stores were known for their trendy clothing and items, and they were popular among teenagers and young adults.

• What are some of the challenges of being a mall security guard?

  Mall security guards face many challenges, including dealing with theft, managing crowds, and confronting difficult patrons. They also have to be aware of their surroundings and be prepared to handle unexpected situations.

• What are some of the most memorable experiences you've had as a mall security guard?

  The security guard shares many memorable experiences, including witnessing a guard and a Cinebon employee engaging in sexual activity in the parking lot, catching a couple having sex in a dressing room, and confronting a man who was sniffing underwear in Victoria's Secret.

• What are your thoughts on the decline of malls?

  The security guard believes that the decline of malls is due to a combination of factors, including the rise of online shopping, the decline of movie theaters, and the rise of phone stores and magic shops in empty mall spaces.

• What are your thoughts on Black Friday?

  The security guard describes Black Friday as a chaotic and stressful experience, with large crowds, fights, and the challenges of managing the holiday shopping frenzy.

• What are some of the most important things to remember when dealing with lost children in a mall?

  The security guard emphasizes the importance of parental supervision and the need to be aware of your surroundings, especially during busy times. They also discuss the importance of using the PA system to announce lost children and the need to be prepared to handle unexpected situations.

• What are some of the best and worst things about being a mall security guard?

  The security guard describes the best things about being a mall security guard as the leniency of not having a boss breathing down their neck, the access to free food, and the opportunity for people watching. The worst things include dealing with difficult patrons, managing crowds, and the potential for danger.

Show Notes