Well, here it is. No longer shall you wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, wondering exactly what's missing in your soul. Nevermore shall you walk the streets of the world wishing for that je ne sais quoi to spice up your life.

That's right, folks, it's the first ever episode of Spar Talk, with your confidently awkward hosts Emily & Carey! In this episode, being the first, we didn't take questions from our adoring fans. Instead, Google provided several starting points and then we moved into some questions that are close to our hearts.

Today, you'll hear us fuss about:

How to get your kid to poop in the toilet
How to get your kid to stop eating their boogers
Why the toilet lid should stay up
Severus Snape: Hero or child-hating creep?
Charlotte "Uptown" is freakin' stupid
Ramen Snot and checking your tissue

Weigh in
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