Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! We're a little late getting this episode on the movie A Christmas Story (1983, d. Bob Clark) out to you. That's perfect in keeping with the source material, however, since the book it was based on, In God We Trust...All Others Pay Cash (1966, w. Jean Shepherd), places most of its stories throughout the year. Protagonist Ralphie's encounter with bully Grover Dill took place on "on a hot, shimmering day", for instance. Shepherd would forgive us for being a few weeks late. Being a radio man, on the other hand, he might not forgive us for the sound quality, which is an eternal struggle. Someday that will all come together.

Please note, we tried to keep this a family friendly episode, which just means beeping out Lizzy every time she swears. We feel absolutely certain that The Old Man would understand her inability to hold back.