In this episode of Our People: Holdeman Mennonite Stories, Amanda is joined by Herman Friesen, who shares his deeply personal story of growing up in a Holdeman Mennonite family and his life after leaving the church. Herman begins by recounting his early years, including his father’s role as a preacher and the significant moment when his father was "benched" from preaching when Herman was only four years old. He shares how he was converted at age 10 and baptized at 11, reflecting on the strong spiritual framework that shaped his childhood.
As the conversation progresses, Herman dives into his experience of leaving the Holdeman church and navigating life beyond its strict boundaries. He talks about the struggles of breaking away from a high-control religious community, including the feelings of isolation, confusion, and loss. Herman opens up about how hard it was to reconcile the faith he was raised in with the new beliefs he was beginning to form. He shares the emotional toll of distancing himself from family and friends who remained in the church, highlighting the personal costs of leaving.
Herman also discusses the sense of freedom he found after leaving, including the opportunities to explore different ways of thinking and living. He talks about building a new life, developing new friendships, and finding a different sense of purpose outside of the Holdeman church. His story is one of resilience, as he found ways to balance his respect for his roots with his desire for independence and personal growth.
This episode provides an intimate, detailed look at what it’s like to grow up in and eventually leave a high-control religious environment. Herman’s honesty and vulnerability make this episode a powerful exploration of faith, identity, and the challenges of starting over. It’s a must-listen for anyone interested in the human side of religious transitions and personal transformation.

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