Delanie Fischer chats with John Wang, author of Big Asian Energy, about confidence, culture, and the power of conversation. They unpack how cultural conditioning, fear, and the desire to be "good enough” shape identity and self-worth. John shares the lessons he learned from his year-long experiment in radical honesty—during which he came clean to friends and family about past lies and committed to always speaking his mind in every interaction—and reflects on how this experience led to deeper connections and a new way of being.

Discussed in this episode: 

• What Is Charisma, Gravitas, and Executive Presence? 


• Biases, Stereotypes, Discrimination, and Coded Language 


• Asian American Culture and the Workplace 


• Fear of Conflict, Confrontation, and Avoidance 


• The 1 Year of Radical Honesty Experiment


• 7 Adaptive Patterns: Achiever, Fixer, Chameleon, Charmer, Commander, Rebel, Invisible One 


• The Belief Behind Your Behavior and The Fear (and Illusion) of Death 


• Rejection as Redirection to Alignment + Finding Community and Belonging 


• The Achievement Monster & How To Get off the Treadmill 


• Internal vs. External Validation & When Affirmations Don’t Work (Try This)


• Self-Worth and Creating Your Own Metric for Success 


• High-Context vs. Low-Context Conversation 


• Self-Diminishment vs. Respecting Cultural Norms 


• The 6 Levels of Mitigating Language (Great for Baby Steps!)


• Saying No, Giving Direct Feedback & Becoming More Assertive 

----

If Self-Helpless has supported you in some way, a quick 5-star rating or review (if you haven't already) means so much!  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/self-helpless/id1251196416

Free goodies including The Quote Buffet and The Watch & Read List: https://www.selfhelplesspodcast.com/

Ad-free episodes now available on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

Your Host, Delanie Fischer: https://www.delaniefischer.com

----

Episodes related to this topic:

“You’re So Sensitive”: Understanding Everyday Microaggressions, Implicit Bias, and Best Practices with Billie Lee & Dr. Gina Torino: https://www.delaniefischer.com/selfhelplesspodcast/episode/2396d366/youre-so-sensitive-understanding-everyday-microaggressions-implicit-bias-and-best-practices-with-billie-lee-and-dr-gina-torino

How A Sexist Society Gets In Your Head (And How To Get It Out) with Kara Loewentheil: https://www.delaniefischer.com/selfhelplesspodcast/episode/23318969/how-a-sexist-society-gets-in-your-head-and-how-to-get-it-out-with-kara-loewentheil

Why You Became A People-Pleaser: https://www.delaniefischer.com/selfhelplesspodcast/episode/27c52c66/why-you-became-a-people-pleaser

Mortality Awareness: Meaning, Motivation, and Your To-Die-For Life with Karen Salmansohn: https://www.delaniefischer.com/selfhelplesspodcast/episode/2367345e/mortality-awareness-meaning-motivation-and-your-to-die-for-life-with-karen-salmansohn

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices