So many parents I work with tell me the same thing:

“I thought I’d be different.”



We want to be gentle, connected, patient. But when the pressure builds… we feel hijacked by old patterns.



This week, I sat down with trauma-informed parent coach Jaspreet Chopra Lewis to talk about why that happens — and what to do about it.

We talked about inherited patterns like emotional invalidation, the exhausting pendulum between too much control and too much guilt, and how nervous system work can help you shift in real-time, not just in hindsight.

💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter.

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Who is Jaspreet Chopra Lewis?

Jaspreet is a Trauma Informed Parent Coach and a Polyvagal Informed music interventionist. She strongly believes that focusing on behavior modification will never help you develop a deeply connected relationship with your child. Real change happens when parents do the work, heal from their own childhood, and see their child's experience from a fresh perspective and not from a lens that is colored by conventional thoughts, their own childhood experiences and their current stresses. And that's how children can be led into better behavior, better choices and emotional regulation.



Her frameworks for healing and parenting draw hugely from the works of Dr. Gabor Mate, Dr. Stephen Porges and Dr. Daniel Seigel. Jaspreet has over 24 years of experience in journalism, operations & management, training and coaching. Apart from supporting parents in their parenting journey, she is also actively working to create safe spaces for women and children through awareness programs.



Jaspreet's Resource: www.themindfulfamily.in/trigger-to-triumph



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Full Transcript HERE.

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Markella Kaplani, M.A.

Clinical-Counseling Psychologist

Parenthood & Relationship Coach

www.markellakaplani.com