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In the No Part 1

In the No Part 1

Update: 2018-10-11106
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In 2017, radio-maker Kaitlin Prest released a mini-series called "No" about her personal struggle to understand and communicate about sexual consent. That show, which dives into the experience, moment by moment, of navigating sexual intimacy, struck a chord with many of us. It's gorgeous, deeply personal, and incredibly thoughtful. And it seemed to presage a much larger conversation that is happening all around us in this moment. And so we decided to embark, with Kaitlin, on our own exploration of this topic. Over the next three episodes, we'll wander into rooms full of college students, hear from academics and activists, and sit in on classes about BDSM. But to start things off, we are going to share with you the story that started it all. Today, meet Kaitlin (if you haven't already). 


In The No Part 1 is a collaboration with Kaitlin Prest. It was produced with help from Becca Bressler.


The "No" series, from The Heart was created by writer/director Kaitlin Prest, editors Sharon Mashihi and Mitra Kaboli, assistant producer Ariel Hahn and associate producer Phoebe Wang, associate sound designer Shani Aviram. Special thanks to actor Tommy Schell.


Check out Kaitlin's new show, The Shadows.


Support Radiolab today at Radiolab.org/donate

Comments (26)

Jomo Maca

cz. CCC cccc. C. c C. c. , , , ,. cxxxxx C xaxz, a

Dec 30th
Reply

Keith Baker

For those struggling to understand why men persisting after being told "no" is a problem and how it remains a problem even if a "yes" is eventually obtained, it's because of the power structure in our society. Without getting terribly into it, wearing someone down by being persistent and not listening the first time places the woman in a compromised position because part of the underlying power structure is that women are expected to put men's needs first. Not to mention that trying to make the other party guilty for not wanting to participate with you is horribly manipulative and super not okay.

Dec 29th
Reply

nina matzat

terrible I expected better from radiolab

Dec 17th
Reply

Adam Boarman

this is the worst episode of radiolab ever

Dec 10th
Reply

Elias Sido

Horrible episode with a double standard narsacism

Dec 4th
Reply

Nathaniel Hopf

He did absolutely nothing wrong

Dec 3rd
Reply

David Orozco

this is crazy blind to the male perspective it's kinda silly

Dec 3rd
Reply

minombre esnada

David Orozco Agreed. I was really annoyed with part one of this series, where that chick took zero accountablity for her behavior and how it could have been misconstrued by her so-called friend. Her rage was ridiculous, she wasn't trying to understand the situation from his point-of-view at all.

Dec 3rd
Reply

JENNIFER WANG

Sorry this was insufferable

Dec 1st
Reply

Cy Greig

They were both responsible for what happened. Refusing to get it out in the open and discuss it after the fact ruined the friendship. Neither can fully blame the other for what happened. She could've pushed him off and stopped everything. She didn't do this knowing full well how this was causing him to respond. Taking initiative is a must even if you might not get everything you want. He kept pushing knowing she didn't want to have sex. He kept trying to cross that boundary after she said no. Knowing when to stop is essential as is actually stopping.

Dec 1st
Reply

Joe Clark

Terrible episode. Should have been called, "All Men are Rapists: How to Change Your Mind After the Fact"

Nov 28th
Reply

Sarah Smith

Great episode!

Nov 23rd
Reply

Forest Schweitzer

Thank you for making this.

Nov 16th
Reply

Becca Hall

This episode is great and has given me a lot of perspective on some sexual experiences I didnt want and how much coersion and emotional manipulation can affect me because of the way I have been brought up in society as a woman. MeToo

Nov 7th
Reply

Annette C

I see this story as an example of how both genders of us are confused about the issue of sex, when to engage, when to say "no" clearly, and how to hear it. I think women are confused, and I think men are confused. Some of the signals men have gotten from our culture about how to go about seducing a woman have contributed to the problem Some of the signals women have gotten from our culture about what is expected of them have contributed to the problem. I think this story illustrates this very well. Two good people tried to make something happen, but ended up ruining something instead. Shortly after listening to this podcast, I watched an episode of The Andy Griffith show. Barney Fife was on a double date with Andy, trying to force himself on his date in the back seat. The laughs came because he was unsuccessful. She fought him off and got out of the car. It was a non-issue. Made me cringe. No wonder we are so confused.

Oct 26th
Reply

Chaddwic Shay

pretty razzed by this one. I may get it wrong, but she agreed she wanted to masturbate and simultaneously watch him masturbate. Fine. it progressed into sex from there. not honestly too surprising. But i find it disturbing she could now essentially turn it into a sexual assault simply because she is female. If Jay suddenly felt afterwards that he was pressured into it we wouldn't accept it from him. so why is it run of the mill for a woman to decide afterwards that it was unwanted? without a clear NO moment it becomes very difficult, for me at least, to determine fault IMO

Oct 23rd
Reply

Cy Greig

Becca Hall He was pushy and should've stopped at the line. Knowing when to stop and actually stopping is the respectful thing to do. She also allowed this line to be crossed. Setting and sticking to a boundary you made is the responsible thing to do.

Dec 1st
Reply

Becca Hall

Chaddwic Shay coersion is sexual assault

Nov 7th
Reply

Nina Clerecuzzio

worst episode ever

Oct 17th
Reply

Nina Clerecuzzio

Pete Dews The subject is beneath them. This episode felt like a buzzfeed feminist / Lifetime podcast. I listen to RadioLab to avoid that type of podcasts.

Oct 25th
Reply

Gabriella Arroyo

Nina Clerecuzzio i dno, the one about bears was pretty terrible...

Oct 22nd
Reply

Tyler Price

I hope there isn't a part 2. Booo

Oct 16th
Reply

Adrian Alexander

Original Title: The Narcissist Who Can't Say No

Oct 16th
Reply

BigPapaPump

One of the best podcasts I've ever listened to. Makes a man rethink his actions

Oct 13th
Reply

Boba F.

"this isnt even my final form!" said all the me2ers

Oct 13th
Reply
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In the No Part 2
In the year since accusations of sexual assault were first brought against Harvey Weinstein, our news has been flooded with stories of sexual misconduct, indicting very visible figures in our public life. Most of these cases have involved unequivocal breaches of consent, some of which have been criminal. But what have also emerged are conversations surrounding more difficult situations to parse – ones that exist in a much grayer space. When we started our own reporting through this gray zone, we stumbled into a challenging conversation that we can’t stop thinking about. In this second episode of ‘In the No’, radio-maker Kaitlin Prest joins us for a conversation with Hanna Stotland, an educational consultant who specializes in crisis management. Her clients include students who have been expelled from school for sexual misconduct. In the aftermath, Hanna helps them reapply to school. While Hanna shares some of her more nuanced and confusing cases, we wrestle with questions of culpability, generational divides, and the utility of fear in changing our culture.Advisory: This episode contains some graphic language and descriptions of very sensitive sexual situations, including discussions of sexual assault, consent and accountability, which may be very difficult for people to listen to. Visit The National Sexual Assault Hotline at online.rainn.org for resources and support. This episode was reported with help from Becca Bressler and Shima Oliaee, and produced with help from Rachael Cusick. Special thanks to Ben Burke and Jackson Prince.Support Radiolab today at Radiolab.org/donate. 

In the No Part 2

2018-10-1900:40:1947

Baby Blue Blood Drive
Horseshoe crabs are not much to look at.  But beneath their unassuming catcher’s-mitt shell, they harbor a half-billion-year-old secret: a superpower that helped them outlive the dinosaurs and survive all the Earth’s mass extinctions.  And what is that secret superpower? Their blood. Their baby blue blood.  And it’s so miraculous that for decades, it hasn’t just been saving their butts, it’s been saving ours too.But that all might be about to change.  Follow us as we follow these ancient critters - from a raunchy beach orgy to a marine blood drive to the most secluded waterslide - and learn a thing or two from them about how much we depend on nature and how much it depends on us. BONUS: If you want to know more about how miraculous horseshoe crabs are, here's a bunch of our favorite reads:Alexis Madrigal, "The Blood Harvest" in The Atlantic, and Sarah Zhang's recent follow up in The Atlantic, "The Last Days of the Blue Blood Harvest" Deborah Cramer, The Narrow EdgeDeborah Cramer, "Inside the Biomedical Revolution to Save Horseshoe Crabs" in Audubon Magazine Richard Fortey, Horseshoe Crabs and Velvet WormsIan Frazier, "Blue Bloods"  in The New Yorker Lulu Miller's short story, "Me and Jane"  in Catapult MagazineJerry Gault, "The Most Noble Fishing There Is"  in Charles River's Eureka Magazineor check out Glenn Gauvry's horseshoe crab research database This episode was reported by Latif Nasser with help from Damiano Marchetti and Lulu Miller, and was produced by Annie McEwen and Matt Kielty with help from Liza Yeager.Special thanks to Arlene Shaner at the NY Academy of Medicine, Tim Wisniewski at the Alan Mason Cheney Medical Archives at Johns Hopkins University, Jennifer Walton at the library of the Marine Biological Lab of the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution, and Glenn Gauvry at the Ecological Research and Development Group.Support Radiolab today at Radiolab.org/donate. 

Baby Blue Blood Drive

2018-08-2901:00:1555

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In the No Part 1

In the No Part 1

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