The Dental A-Team often hears from team members who feel like they're not good enough. In this episode, Kiera shares with listeners how to switch from harmful self sabotage and comparison to a healthy awareness of growth and positivity.

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Transcript:

Kiera Dent (00:00 )

Hello, Dental A Team listeners. This is Kiera and today I want to dive into something that I think is really important. I feel, hear this from a lot of people. I've coached a lot of dentists. I've worked with a lot of team members. And so I feel like I've got a pretty good background on how to talk about this. And I think just as human nature, and I'm not saying that all of us are there, but

 

Every dentist, every office manager, every team member I talk to, no matter how successful or how terrible they're doing, they say, I'm not doing well. I'm not doing enough. Like I'm not doing good enough. And I just wanna like dig into this a little bit today because I think it's a lie that we all believe to some level. We feel this imposter syndrome. We feel this... ⁓

 

I don't know. It's just this weirdness that I want to help you rewire that story and to maybe give a different perspective on that, because the reality is you're doing better than you think you are. And I want to reset and reframe that internal dialogue because I believe being your own best cheerleader or your own worst critic, both of them have pros and cons. And I think like there's so much icky in the world that why don't we start to become your best cheerleader? I truly do believe the quote that ⁓ Tony Robbins says like where

 

where focus goes energy flow. So if we're focused on not being good enough or why am I not good enough or I don't know how to do this. Well, yes, there's a line of humility that I appreciate. There's also a line of self sabotage that I think we need to start to cut that script and become even stronger. really, Dental A Team's mission is to positively impact the world of dentistry in the greatest way possible and to help you build thriving practices, thriving leaders, not just surviving, not just hoping and like skirting along. Dentists always want to know how they're doing compared to other dentists.

 

And so really just giving you kind of that baseline to help you out. ⁓ This is the emotional side of leadership. This is the self-worth, the confidence that rewiring the not enough trap that I wanna just like dig into. And it's just more of a conversation and hopefully bringing some insights and some highlights to help you stop that narrative to really highlight the growth that you can have and just to give you some better. I don't know, just a hug. You're doing so good out there. And I think like as a proud mom of you.

 

⁓ Just reminding you of how good you are doing, not better than you are, not worse than you are, but realistically where you are. And I think so many of us accidentally self-sabotage the goodness that we have rather than celebrating how great we're doing. ⁓ And again, momentum builds. So let's build momentum of positivity rather than momentum of negativity. So ⁓ I think the first thing that I like to look at is like, what is the root belief that causes you to have it? So like these thoughts are coming from somewhere. So is it past experiences? Is it comparisonism? Is it perfectionism?

 

⁓ I went to a Tony Robbins conference. I do love Tony so much. I have a great time there. I don't think everything's perfect, but I think a lot of great things are, are good in it. And I went to, my favorite thing is date with destiny. And I went to it last year and, ⁓ Tony always has this talk about our towards values and our way values. And, he says, why is it that we try it? We do so good in life, making it hard to feel good and easy to feel bad. And I think about this a lot. And so last year, my word was comparison and.

 

He actually has you go on this whole rant. So if you can imagine, I feel I present in such a different way than how I was at that conference. ⁓ The beast was unleashed, we'll put it that way. One of my dear friends was with me and they said that they've never seen Kiera like 4.0 version come out. And what Tony has you do is you actually go through, cause comparison was actually one of the biggest things that was holding me back in life. I was comparing to all these other women about my body, about my looks, about my business, about everything.

 

I realized that my self-sabotaging was from a deep-rooted piece and like prior to that, ⁓ was fear that I let go of. was fear of all these things. And what Tony has you do is you go on this monologue, this rant to basically just see how much of life you've lost by having this. So I went into comparison and I said like, Kiera Dent, see, hear, feel, and know that I will never, ever succumb.

 

to the limiting and self-sabotaging and ludicrous lie of comparison. And then you go on a rant. And luckily Eminem, I do have a side nickname of DJ Skittlez. Yep, I wanted to be a rapper with Eminem. So I figured Skittlez with a Z was gonna be my rapper DJ name. So if you ever come voting with me, DJ Skittlez does come out voting to make your perfect playlist.

 

But Eminem was on and it was such a good thing for me. And I remember just unleashing the beast of this comparison and you yell and you scream and you just like, you know, like, and the goal is that you, you look at your life from this lens of how much has this self sabotaging piece taken from you. And when I looked at it, like I wasn't participating fully with my family. wasn't working out at the gym because I didn't want to be compared to other women. I wasn't, ⁓

 

being as bold in business because I was comparing myself to what other people did and just how much of life was being sucked away from me. And so with that, if that's something like for you to just look to see where is it and what's maybe the one or two ⁓ values that you're holding onto that make you feel bad, that I would encourage to be a way value, not something we want to go towards. So for me, I have on comparison and like comparison only shows up for me when I forget that I am like just, ⁓

 

For me, like what I will say, I do believe in God, that I am God's greatest creation. when I, so now what I've done is I've taken comparison and I flipped it. So like, if I ever start comparison, it's only due to me forgetting that I'm God's greatest creation. And that quickly for me eliminates that. And so, and it's like fear only if I forget that I have like magic and brilliance that spews from me.

 

So what the goal is, is you take that root belief and you flip it and you figure out what it is. And then what is something like, it's only if I were to forget that I am like brilliant and have like unlimited potential within me. So like for fear or comparison or perfectionism or whatever it is. And so what is that? Where did that story begin? And maybe you don't know. ⁓ And maybe go through a rant if you want, or maybe just write a new definition and make it harder to feel that. So for me,

 

It's actually pretty hard for me now to feel comparison. Like I can go back to that, like Kiera 4.0, if you were to call my friend Pierce, he's been on the podcast, he will tell you Kiera 4.0 came out on that comparison rant to where I feel like I literally was able to obliterate it to where it's not there. And for you looking at why am I not good enough, maybe if we can find one or two of your route towards values and away values, what are those away values? And could we...

 

Could we acknowledge it? Could we see why it's there? And could we maybe decide to put that to rest for a little while? ⁓ And I think when I do this exercise and I write out what success means, it's crazy how many weird rules I have to put in to be successful. And maybe even for yourself, writing out like today what you feel you have to do to be successful. Oftentimes this is why we feel like we're not enough is because we've made this laundry list where it's impossible for any person.

 

ourselves or some