TPJ 33: Get Comfortable Being the Authority Figure
The word authority gets a bad rap when it comes to peaceful parenting because it tends to get lumped in with the authoritarian parenting style which is the “do as I say or else” style. But authority is actually well rooted in the authoritative style where you have high expectations but you also provide high support and warmth.
When we choose to abdicate our role as the authority, our children are then left to make decisions they are not ready to make. Instead, if we become that empathetic firm leader, our children can relax because they know there's someone at the helm.
We need to get comfortable being the authority figure. As Janet Lansbury said “Children NEED parents. They feel no real freedom without boundaries. They are not little adults with the maturity to make healthy, thoughtful, sensible decisions about screen use, sugar intake, etc.” I couldn’t agree more.
In this episode, I’ll share why being the authority figure in your family actually liberates your children and 3 ways to get comfortable being the authority figure...here’s what you’ll hear:
[6:19] It’s our JOB!
[7:30] Authoritative vs. Authoritarian
[11:06] Legal and moral responsibility
[12:47] Social and physical responsibility
[15:50] Is authority harsh?
[16:41] Don’t throw your kids in the deep end 🏊♀️
[18:47] Downside of democracy (in the home)
[22:23] Janet Lansbury’s take on parenting by democracy
[25:42] Eventually you will have no more authority…
[26:44] #1 - Give small choices
[30:44] #2 - Get comfortable
[33:02] #3 - Why it’s an act of generosity
Remember, when children have a leader and have clarity around the expectations of the home they are liberated and free to enjoy the ride.
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Show Notes: https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/33