The Nice Guy Syndrome in Your Divorce Recovery - Michael Read || DPTSP 067 || David
Description
In this engaging episode of Don't Pick The Scab Podcast, host David sits down with Michael Read, a men’s coach and creator of The Adaptive Male YouTube channel. Michael specializes in helping men understand healthy masculinity by exploring the intersections of science, psychology, history, and culture. Together, they dive deep into how men over 40 can heal from divorce by reclaiming their sense of purpose, rebuilding their identity, and navigating emotions in a healthy way.
Michael explains how societal expectations and "nice guy syndrome" often lead men to neglect self-care, making it crucial for men to prioritize their well-being and emotional health. He highlights the importance of moving past toxic masculinity narratives, embracing emotional expression, and fostering healthy masculinity based on self-regulation and authenticity. Michael also introduces concepts like "emotional language" and the "shadow self," helping men better understand their feelings and behaviors.
The discussion touches on the unique challenges divorced men face, including the loss of identity, purpose, and self-worth. Michael offers actionable strategies for men to rebuild their lives by engaging in self-care, finding purpose outside of relationships, and fostering connections with other men. He also discusses the evolving role of masculinity across different life stages and how co-parenting can be an opportunity to demonstrate healthy masculinity to children. This episode is packed with insights and practical advice for men seeking to heal and thrive after divorce.
10 Important Topics Covered in the Podcast:
The Algorithm of Behavior: Understanding how childhood experiences shape adult behaviors and reactions, and how to reprogram these patterns.
Emotional Language: Teaching men to reconnect with their emotions by recognizing physical sensations and associating them with emotional experiences.
Toxic vs. Healthy Masculinity: Exploring the differences between toxic traits and healthy masculine qualities, such as emotional regulation and authenticity.
Nice Guy Syndrome: Examining how trying to please others at the expense of oneself can lead to relationship breakdowns and self-neglect.
The Shadow Self: Carl Jung’s concept of the shadow self, where suppressed parts of our personality resurface in unhealthy ways if left unaddressed.
Self-Care for Men: Emphasizing the importance of prioritizing self-care to avoid burnout and foster healthier relationships.
Rebuilding Identity After Divorce: Helping men rediscover their sense of purpose and self-worth by separating their identity from a failed relationship.
Emotional Numbness in Men: Addressing the phenomenon of emotional disconnection and its physical and psychological consequences.
Masculinity Across Life Stages: Examining how men’s roles and perceptions of masculinity evolve with age, from physical strength to wisdom and guidance.
Co-Parenting with Masculinity: Using healthy masculinity to be a positive parental role model while navigating the challenges of co-parenting post-divorce.
Michael’s YouTube Channel - The Adaptive Male
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