Join host Nyomi Banks on The Season of Self-Love Podcast for a transformative Wisdom Wednesday conversation with Christian de la Huerta—spiritual teacher, breathwork facilitator, and author with 30 years of experience guiding people through deep personal transformation. Explore how personal growth ties into collective healing and why conscious love is the foundation of authentic connection.
In This Episode:
 • Understanding the ego mind: Why we get stuck in power struggles
 • The difference between intensity and intimacy in relationships
• How unconscious wounds from childhood sabotage our relationships
• Breathwork as a tool for healing past trauma stored in the body
• Why self-knowledge is the foundation of loving others
• The power of surrender as an empowering (not disempowering) act
 • Distinguishing worldly power from soulful power
• Why women's empowerment is critical for global healing

About Christian de la Huerta: For 30 years, Christian has been guiding people through deep personal transformation. His wisdom spans spirituality, breathwork, and emotional healing.

 His latest book, Conscious Love: Transforming Our Relationship to Relationships, helps people break through patterns that block real, meaningful connection.

Key Concepts Explored: The Ego Mind Explained: Christian offers a powerful visual: "If you put a baseball in the center of a stadium, that's the ego. Who we are is actually the freaking stadium."

• The ego = sense of separate identity (the "I")
• We've allowed this tiny part of who we are to think it's ALL who we are
• The ego makes important life choices from a limited, fear-based perspective
• Understanding the ego allows us to pause before reacting and choose our response

Why Relationships Fail: Most people struggle with relationships because:

• We approach them expecting someone to "complete us" or "make us happy"
• We're running relationships from subconscious wounds we're not even aware of
• We react to present situations based on old hurts and childhood conclusions
• We suppress painful beliefs ("I'm not good enough") which then sabotage our relationships
• We attract the wrong people or people who aren't available as a form of self-sabotage

The Honeymoon Phase vs. Real Love: Adapted from Scott Peck's The Road Less Traveled:

• Initial infatuation/lust = collapsed ego boundaries (feels amazing but temporary)
• When the honeymoon ends (3-9 months), ego walls come back up
• Real loving begins when the honeymoon ends
• Love isn't the feeling—it's the act of placing ourselves outside our comfort zone for another's spiritual growth
• We confuse intensity with intimacy, lust with love

Breathwork for Healing Trauma: Christian teaches breathwork that heals past trauma quickly and effectively:

• Breathe in a circular connected way for 60-90 minutes
• Bypasses the mind and goes directly to trauma stored in the body
• Talk therapy helps us understand why we do things, but trauma lives in the body
• Breathwork clears old wounds permanently—lives change after one session
• Originally called "rebirthing" because people heal their birth trauma and reset

The Power of Surrender: From Christian's book Awakening the Soul of Power:

• Surrender is NOT giving up, wimping out, or throwing in the towel
• Surrender is an incredibly empowering and courageous act
• It's about releasing control and allowing Spirit/God to lead
• Misunderstanding surrender keeps us stuck in ego-driven choices

Two Types of Power:

• Worldly/Ego Power: Hierarchy, control, fear, force, domination—requires pushing others down
• Soulful Power: Gandhi, Dr. King, nonviolence—dramatic change without violence
• Gandhi brought the British Empire to its knees without shooting a gun or landing a punch
• We reject power because we fear corruption, but in doing so, we give our power away
• How many times have we said "yes" when inside it was a "no"?

Why Women's Empowerment Matters: From Awakening the Soul of Power:

• The single most important thing that needs to happen in the world
• Not to idealize women or put them on a pedestal
• Not to give women more mess to clean up
• Because we've been running off balance between masculine and feminine energies for 6,000+ years
• Patriarchy turned the feminine into "less than" and "weakness"—a twisted lie and instrument of control

Nyomi's Personal Revelation: Nyomi shares her explant journey as an example of soulful power:

• Had breast implants for 20+ years, causing illness
• Initially wasn't going to share her journey publicly (ego/insecurity)
• Realized: "How can you talk about self-love when you're moving from insecurity?"
• "I used to say I'm 80% authentic—each boob was 10%. I needed to take them out to be 100% fully connected."
• Watched documentary Explant and saw how authorities dismissed women's voices
• Black box warnings exist on implants, but doctors aren't required to inform patients
• Misuse of power: "They dismissed most of the women's voices"
• Now advocates for her daughters, granddaughter, and all women

Powerful Truths Shared:

• "How can we expect anybody to love us if we don't love ourselves? And how can we love ourselves if we don't know ourselves?"
• "Love starts within. It all begins with self-knowledge and self-awareness."
• "Just because we suppress painful beliefs doesn't mean they go away—they fester under the surface."
• "We subconsciously sabotage relationships to ensure the very thing we're trying to avoid: ending up alone."
• "The breath is the beginning and end of everything. Breath is life."
• "When the honeymoon ends is when the work of actual loving begins."
• "Love is placing ourselves outside our comfort zone for the sake of another's spiritual growth."

Christian's Spiritual Journey:

• Studied psychology; father was a psychiatrist
• Realized psychology ignored spirituality—an integral part of being human
• Raised Catholic, told he'd "burn in hell for eternity" for being gay
• Had to "throw the baby out with the baptismal water" and find other spiritual paths
• Explored Eastern religions (Buddhism, Hinduism), indigenous traditions
• Spent 20s achieving success but felt an "expanding hole in my gut—something was missing"
• Started searching for meaning, purpose, and authentic spiritual connection

Perfect for listeners interested in:

• Conscious relationships and breaking toxic patterns
• Breathwork and trauma healing
• Understanding the ego mind
• Spiritual awakening and personal power
• Women's empowerment and feminine energy
• LGBTQ+ spirituality and finding authentic faith
• Service as a path to self-love
• Healing childhood wounds affecting adult relationships

Christian's Books:

1. Coming Out Spiritually (first book)
2. Awakening the Soul of Power (how to step into power without hierarchy, control, or domination)
3. Conscious Love: Transforming Our Relationship to Relationships (latest—10 challenges we face in relationships)

Connect with Christian de la Huerta:

• Website: SoulfulPower.com
• Books available on Amazon or local bookstores
• Social media links available on website

November Theme: Giving Back: The Power of Service and Community (Week 1) Series: Year of ReBirth 2025 -

Season 4: The Season of Healing Intentionally This episode is a masterclass in understanding why relationships fail, how to heal trauma at its source, and why personal transformation creates collective healing. Christian's wisdom on conscious love offers a roadmap for breaking free from unconscious patterns and building authentic connections.

 Subscribe to The Season of Self-Love Podcast at theseasonofselflovepodcast.com or AskNyomi.com #ConsciousLove #Breathwork #EgoMind #SoulfulPower #Relationships #TraumaHealing #SelfKnowledge #WomensEmpowerment #SeasonOfSelfLove #ChristianDeLaHuerta

Coming Soon: Christian will return for a deeper conversation on sexuality and spirituality. Plus, catch him on Ask Nyomi Bridging the Gap podcast for live audience interaction on love, sex, relationships, and cultural differences.

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-season-of-self-love--6003379/support.

"Thank you for spending this time with me on The Season of Self Love. Remember, self-love isn't selfish – it's sacred. You are worthy of the love you so freely give to others.

If today's episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs this reminder. And don't forget to rate and review the show – it helps us reach more beautiful souls.

Connect with me on Instagram @TheRealNyomiBanks and @TheSeasonofSelfLovePodcast
visit theseasonofselflovepodcast.com for resources and our downloadable workbook.

Until Monday – keep choosing YOU.
This is your girl, the goddess Nyomi Banks. Stay in your season."