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Joyfully Married After

Author: Heath and Tracy

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Joyfully Married After with Heath and Tracy is a weekly podcast discussing relationships, specializing in premarital preparedness and inter-marital improvement. We want you Joyfully Married After everything.Heath and Tracy are relationship strategists, specializing in premarital preparedness and improving your marriage. We want our listeners married and motivated.We'll discuss our journey with sex, money, disagreements in marriage, fighting fair when you have disagreements in marriage. We'll also cover things like improving communication, how to handle trust issues in marriage and learn how to avoid divorce.Since we have four children, expect to hear discussion techniques on keeping your marriage strong despite inevitable disagreements on how to raise the kids and keep life in balance.So if you want to be an awesome mate and how to avoid the minefields in relationships, tune in every week! Don't forget to check out HeathandTracy.com
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What Does A Wife Want?

What Does A Wife Want?

2022-05-1615:41

Last week, Heath told you What A Man Wants! This week, Tracy is telling you What A Wife Wants!Tracy breaks it down to 5 main points: Talk To Me - I need conversation. Open your mouth. "Was the dinner good? Do I look good today?" Converse with your significant other; force yourself if you have to. I Need Some Affection - What really does it for her. What are her love languages. Acts of Service are Tracy's (Gas in the car, Dishes done, Flowers) Show her the love.Be Open And Honest - No Trust, No Peace. Women don't want a liar, share what's going on.Understanding & Respect -  Getting to know her. She is doing a lot. Working, teaching, cooking, she’d tired. Make her bed, Spray lavender on pillow. Empathize, don’t criticize.Support - Your wife needs support both financially and emotionally. How are you contributing to the relationship? Give her a break sometimes; pick up the baby, change a diaper, pour her a bubble bath, take her to see her family.Download our Legacy Living Worksheet HERE! Check out our WebsiteConnect with us on Tik TokWatch us on YouTube
Heath is bringing the TRUTH on today's episode of Joyfully Married After. We are talking What A Husband Wants! RESPECT in his house. Can’t dog out your husband in front of ppl. Working, being kind, father, providing as best as possible. If he is being a many worthy of respect...then give him some RESPECT!INTIMACY on the regular. Sometimes other things get in the way. Kids, sports practice, tv shows, jobs, you get tired. Don’t want to be irritating to your wife. The ask, convey to me when you’re feeling amorous. Initiate ladies. COMPLIMENT him. “You look great today!” "I love the outfit!" "Your beard is soft!" If I’m doing the dishes, taking out the trash, counseling the children, let me know you see it and you appreciate. Let me know you’re glad you married me.Download our Legacy Living Worksheet HERE! Check out our WebsiteConnect with us on Tik TokWatch us on YouTube
How do you know you've found THE ONE???On today's episode, Heath and Tracy share the 5 things that solidified them know that they were each others THE ONE.Tracy's 5 Things:Heath pursued me.I felt secure and myself around Heath.Heath made me laugh and made our relationship FUN.We could talk on the phone for hours without getting bored of one another.Heath's female friends had so much respect and love for him that I knew he was a keeper.Heath's 5 Things:Tracy was so easy to have conversation with.No drama!I have always found Tracy visually appealing and still do.I couldn't find anything I didn't like.Tracy had a class about her and the way she carried herself was very attractive to me.Download our Legacy Living Worksheet HERE! Check out our WebsiteConnect with us on Tik TokWatch us on YouTube
Is There Too Much Emphasis on the Wedding?Tracy and I explore people's reasons not to have a wedding, especially for budget newlyweds when the marriage is SO much more important than the wedding itself. People delay marriage unnecessarily and end up asking themselves, is it worth spending money on a wedding? Is it worth it to have a wedding? Are weddings overrated? Should we have a small wedding? Since we are budget newlyweds, should we have a budget wedding? Some of the research we did for this article shows that small weddings are best for longevity in marriage. We were surprised when we saw this and maybe that means there are reasons to elope so you don't have to say, I spent too much on my wedding. We outline several solid alternatives for getting married sooner, not putting so much emphasis on the perfect wedding and maybe revisiting it down the road.Download our Legacy Living Worksheet here: https://bit.ly/legacylivingworksheetheathandtracy.com
1. Show Interest.2. Touch your spouse. 3. Tell a joke 4. Cleaning it up(for the married people) unmarried people- do small things. 5. Turn Down the bed for each other 6. Wear something special. Their favorite dress, shirt, pants, color. Etc. 7. Snuggle, while you are watching tv, or touching at the table in a restaurant under the table. 8. Talk, Talk, Talk Women use 1000’s words more than men. 9. Compliment them. “You smell good”, Your beard is soft. Etc. Your hair looks good. That meal was good. I am so happy you have helped the kids. 10. Send a great text. Let them know you are thinking of them. Handwritten notes work too. 11. Holding hands. 12.Kiss when you say hello and when you say goodbye. It’s a special salutation. 13. Look into each other's eyes. Don't take them for granted. Make it a habit 21 days makes a habit 
HeathandTracy.comLegacy Living Worksheet here: https://bit.ly/legacylivingworksheetThanks for listening!We’ve got 10 things we wish we knew before we got married. Why? How you will feel after you hear this... 1. Marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. 2. Marriage success comes from repetition. You practice being married every day. Am I practicing marriage or practicing divorce dating 3. Deprioritizing everything over your marriage. Work kids family 4. Always act like you are 35 - lots of people you can model. Ask people that have experience. Take their best practices and use them. Keep that young energy. Date night flirting 5. Marriage is about the other person and it’s a daily dying of self. It’s a daily practice of working the selfish out. When that happens you will submit to one another. 6. Plan to be married forever. Don’t stay if there is abuse, mental physical 7. Never sacrifice your spouse's feelings for the benefit of your family or others. Make your partner feel protected and that you have their back 8. Celebrate your partner's differences. Yin Yang. Don’t pick at them recognize they are enhancing your weakness 9. Do put off doing don’t nice things. Continually the love bank. Don’t expect anything back 10. The magic happens in the failures 
How to Repair Broken Trust In any relationship trust in one another is key. A key component that threatens trust is fear. Social media Story- Talking to someone on SM about things that you are afraid to talk to your partner about. Give Examples. Give Subject matter How you feel about what’s going on at work Their appearance You need more attention that you are getting This action unknowingly break the trust that was built up over the years. Then avoidance and shame avoiding the consequences and confrontation. This is a great analogy for primary or spousal relationships too. 1. Be open to keeping the trust. The person who was lied to gets a pass to ask any questions, check the phone, check whatever at anytime. This seems invasive at first but will minimize naturally with time. The person that lost trust needs to let this happen without getting in your feelings or retaliating. 2. Discuss items that bother you or that you’re concerned with. Bring why you are suspicious and what the person can do to alleviate your fear. 3. Talk through issues even if you’re scared or uncomfortable; you’ll be so glad you did. Do this when there is no emotion involved. During basic tasks, cooking, running errands. Or just sitting down with a glass of wine or over dinner to talk thru it. Not being up and throwing in the other's face but talking thru the issue openly to take trust to the next step. Ask questions and answer them openly and without hesitation. 4. Get help. A coach, a professional, to walk through it with you if necessary. 5. Meet things head-on and never hide from the challenges. If you’ve already gone down the wrong road, stop. Admit you are wrong and work through it. You can do it. You can push through. 
What would your relationship be like if it was perfect?Myth #1: Perfect relationship partners are totally compatible.Myth #2: Perfect relationship partners have “equal appetites.”Myth #3: Great partners always put their relationship first.Myth #4: Great partners are never attracted to anyone else.Myth #5: Perfect relationships do not have serious conflicts.Myth #6: Perfect relationship partners are always “on the same team.”
We are discussing how couples have different ways of being married.The secret to a great marriage is deciding what you want your marriage to be about – and don't just give me that gauzy, dreamy poetry about love. Be practical. Be specific.Starter MarriageCompanionship MarriageParenting MarriageSafety MarriageLiving alone together MarriageOpen MarriageCovenant MarriageJoin Us Live Every Monday for Joyfully Married After Podcast Live!heathandtracy .com to join Marriage Money Mindset
Listen up! There are things that you are doing that are ruining your relationship. We give you the ones you need to stop.We are discussing 7 ways you are sabotaging your relationship or Self Sabotaging relationships. We also discuss ways to stop sabotaging relationships. So ask yourself " Am I Sabotaging My Relationship?" And What are the Behaviors that Ruin Relationships?Are You ignoring your partner's interests or do you say thank you for the small things?Listen to find out what you are doing that can kill the love in your relationship.Join Us Live Every Monday for Joyfully Married After Podcast Live!heathandtracy.com to join the Marriage Money Mindset Community.
In this episode, we discuss the reasons you want to fix your sexless marriage and the way to avoid a sexless marriage.We talk about the reasons you are in a sexless marriage. And How to fix it.A sexless marriage could be due to a number of causes, including:Low sex driveLack of emotional connectionPoor communicationMedical problems like medications that cause low libido and side effects.DisabilityMental health conditionsChildrenAge-related factors like hormones ebb and flow with different stages of life.Unresolved angerJoin Us Live Every Monday for Joyfully Married After Podcast Live!heathandtracy.com to join Marriage Money Mindset
When it time to seek therapy in your relationship?
Your words are so powerfulGod created the earth with words.You create your world with your words.Create your marriage with your words.Create your finances with your words.Your spouse needs to hear your edify and lift them.They don't need your direction.
Don't you want to be JOYFULLY Married?What are the goals in your marriage?"The goal is to be happily married not just married."Why get married if you aren't going to married because we all know that you don't have to be married. You need to make a distinct choice to be JOYFULLY married.
Want a Happy Marriage?

Want a Happy Marriage?

2021-07-1621:02

In this Episode we Discuss how to have a happy Marriage. 1.  Invest in your marriage just like your business/career with a weekly meeting with an Agenda- Treat this like you would a valuable client. Make sure you don’t miss it.No interruptions. In a quiet place. Ask the question. Where can I improve?2 .Create the Vision of Your Union.Who do you see yourself as the significant other?Think like premier RomanticCater directly to their love language in a big way on a regular basisLook for others to emulateBe with others that have marriage you want or others that want the same for their marriage (community)ALWAYS HAVE SOMETHING GREAT TO LOOK FORWARD TOAre you excited about the futureGive yourself something to be excited about.Is there an annual trip you take.Is this something you like to do together that you can do on a regular basis?Make rules - If I am gone this many days, we do a quick weekend away. Never miss date night, pillow talk on Sunday nights etc. There are so many!! Coffee Day. Get in your 10!It’s possible to have a great marriage and a great career or business. Yes you can have it all. Envision it, claim it.Use Do Overs - I know i messed up last time.. Only 1 or 2  yearDo you buy more career books than marriage books? Stop saying you're doing it to put food on the table. Put each other first. For 30 days.14- nights away just the two of you in another town4- If gone more than 4 days then take days off during the week.6- no phone after 6pm
The best way to handle money in your MarriageBegin with a plan to move your family and your future in building a legacy.This is the way to solid finances.You want to start with an abundance mindset. Not a scarcity mindset.Be Ok, plan. Watch your spending on the necessities. Rent/Mortgage, Transportation and food. My dad calls it “Food, clothing and shelter. Be Secure. This is where you are going for the 6 months or more savings.Build a Wealth plan. This is when you can have fun. Look for those deals to invest in. Meeting on a regular basis with your partner to go over your Philosophy and what are the goals and objectives you are moving toward. Stop keeping up with the Joneses. This is hard. Why are you buying this? Do you really need it?Overspending. When you use credit, do you pay more than you would if you paid cash. Face the past bad decisions you have made. Lending money to friends and family. Does helping them change their relationship with money? Does it fix their problem? Credit Cards. Build credit with only 2 credit cards. Or are you trying to live beyond your means?  Student Loans- What is it going to really cost you? Figure out how to save your money. Pay yourself first. Talk about money as a couple. Come together. 
Each year Tracy and I go through this exercise to plan our year. We break it up into 2 parts. ( The first 6 months of the year and the second)  Additionally we do this with each of our adult children as well to get them accustomed to reflection and goal setting. If have a business or you’re creating a brand, it’s great to create a calendar for your content creation as well so you have dates and time frame targets to keep you on track... Brainstorm Ideas-Business ideas, personal goals-I will drop 20 lbs by June 1st with a healthy diet and exercise while maintaining weight through December. "I will complete my research and launch my podcast by March 1st." Non-Negotiables- That truck will not sit in the driveway all year this year. It will be gone by January 31st. "I’m not cooking 6 times a week this year." How much will we make this year? I will make $300k this year.  Look Back to Move Forward last year I made $100k. I gained 15 pounds, I got a new job. "I wasn’t as happy as I’ve been in the past or I found myself happier, etc." How will we make money in 2021? "I will earn 150k from my job with salary, commissions and bonuses. I will start a Shopify Store and net 50k. I will learn to do F/B ads and hustle on FiVR to earn $50k or whatever your answers are."
Focus on small acts of kindness. Boosts your mood. Do t be stingy with each other. You need some water? Pay attention to your inner voice that creates distance. Don’t listen to negative/critical voice on your shoulder. No self sabotage with the inner voice. Don’t allow it prevent you from being vulnerable. Be aware of fantasies you may form. An illusion of oneness vs 2 distinct people working together to create a great marriage. “We don’t do this”, “we don’t do that”...instead of honoring differences and celebrating yin and yang; respecting and celebrating differences while working together. Help your partner feel secure. Not all the focus on yourself. Breaks down empathy and understanding. How can I make them feel more secure? Cell phone not in bed? Are they feeling heard? Cutting down social life if she feels threatened by it. Finding the balance of feeling understand and balanced. Willing to be vulnerable. We have a lowering tolerance for love than we think. Feel your sadness and stay vulnerable. Great joy comes with great sadness. It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.
The year of exposure. Brought out the best and worst in our relationships. What we loved grew and what we hated grew. Go back to the beginning and remember what drew you to each other. Think about what happened. Don’t play a blame game. Put yourself in their shoes. Communication but start with how not what. What’s the process to get us back to where we were. Focus on the process. Be the bigger person. Be responsible for your emotions. Don’t take it personally. It’s time to be the responsible adult the room. Think present NOT past. That’s easy to find receipts to fuel your arguments. Ask the question what can you do now? Take baby steps and look for small wins and small improvement.  
We are being asked your most pressing questions by Gary Jones of the "Get With the Program" Radio show. 
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