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Think Queerly

Author: Darren Stehle

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Discover actionable practices to get insight and clarity about your ideas and create strategies to solve your challenges. Listen to deep-dive interviews with 2SLGBTQ+ thought leaders and change-makers who are creating a more accepting, equitable, and humane world — with a focus on Canadian history and social justice issues. Think Queerly is a hosted by Writer & Coach, Darren Stehle.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

243 Episodes
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Recently, I made a significant change in my life — not quite a new direction, but a new path that's in alignment with what I stand for, my skills, my interests, and what brings meaning to my life. I came to a point in my career where I needed greater financial stability. I started looking into impact-driven community organizations that are working to make a meaningful difference — preferably for LGBTQ+ individuals.---Discover how we can work together if you're an LGBTQ+ creator or change-maker. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jade Pichette (they/them) is an inclusion, diversity, equity, and accessibility professional based in Tkarón:to/Toronto. Currently Jade serves as the Director of Programs at Pride at Work Canada where they work with over 250 large employers across Canada around gender expression, gender identity, and sexual orientation inclusion. Previously Jade served as the Volunteer and Community Outreach Coordinator at The ArQuives, the Education Programs Coordinator at Kind Space, and they continue to run an independent inclusion and diversity consulting business as well as serving as an Ásatrú Gythia (priestess) of Vindisir Kindred. They were one of the authors of the Transitioning Employers: A survey of policies and practices for trans inclusive workplaces and the cohost of the Uncovering Belonging Podcast. In their spare time they can be found geeking out over queer, trans, and Norse histories, fire-keeping, and spending time with their chosen family.You can watch the video here: https://darrenstehle.substack.com/p/pride-at-work-canada-jade-pichette-------☞ Discover more about how we can work together. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this episode, we talk about Mark recently turning 60, the fallacy of multi-passionate creatives, and what success really means. But our primary focus is Mark's signature approach to productivity, his Only 10s framework. He jokes that if you were to show him your to-do list, it would be like reading tarot cards. He would be able to tell you in an instant what you value, what you like and dislike, and what you're afraid of doing.Show notes, links, and watch the interview on video at Queering Self-Mastery with Darren Stehle.------If you’re a creative change-maker who is struggling to make an impact and create a successful business that you love, let’s meet for a free a discovery coaching session. I’ll help you get the clarity you need to determine your next most productive steps and to get back on track. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Many people think that you need to come out to be your "authentic self."What does "being authentic" really mean?How is that advice helpful if you're in the closet and have been struggling to come out for years?What if you've been married for decades and are afraid about who you might hurt and what you might lose?If you're in the closet and thinking about coming out, or if you know of someone who's struggling, this episode is about getting clear about your emotional reasons for coming out, and how you can prepare to be as ready — for when it feels "right" for you to come out and freely create a life you love.As mentioned in the episode, if you want to talk with someone about how to come out, or if you're dealing with shame around your gender or sexual identity, let's meet for a private conversation.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this episode, I speak with Leadership and Organizational Development Coach, Jeremy Long about the power of self-mastery for queer people.Jeremy Long is a Queer man, Coach, and founder of the Conscious Queer Community. He also is the owner of Enhance Leadership as a Leadership and Organizational Development Coach.Click here for the show notes, video, and links mentioned in the episode: ☞ https://darrenstehle.substack.com/p/coach-jeremy-long Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
"Until I was 19 (in 1984), and for almost 15 years, I felt a combination of fear, guilt, shame, unrequited desire, silence, isolation, and otherness."Self-examination and knowing the events, the people, the environments, and the conditions that shaped your past are useful information. This is your personal narrative — and you can do with it what you please. In my case, I was determined to live better in the now than I had been living in my past.The complete show notes are published on Queering Self-Mastery. Sign up for practical tips and strategies for queer-thinking creators and change-makers to create a joyful life, accomplish your goals, and make a difference.---------------If you’re a creator or change-maker who is struggling to make a difference and create a thriving business that you love, let’s meet for a free 90-minute discovery coaching session. I’d like to find out what motivates you and how you want to make a difference in the world. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this re-cast of the inaugural episode of the Queering Self-Mastery Podcast, I explain,The difference between the Think Queerly Podcast and Queerly Self-MasteryMy reasons for creating a new Substack newsletter.What I mean by 'queering self-mastery.'Why you should subscribe and how Queering Self-Mastery will make a transformational difference in your life.☞ Subscribe to Queering Self-Mastery.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
We start at the very beginning: why she decided to join the Canadian Military. Douglas shares her story of what that was like, falling in love with another woman in her unit for the first time, being honourably discharged, and what happened after. Ironically, Douglas worked for the Canadian Department of Justice for many years, while working in advocacy to keep the government accountable. Douglas explains how in 2016, survivors of the LGBT Purge launched a nationwide class action lawsuit against the Canadian government. She was approached to manage the resulting settlement fund reached in 2018, and the rest is history. Read the complete show notes ☞ https://darrenstehle.com/michelle-douglas-lgbt-purge-fund/==========Darren Stehle is a Mind-Mastery Coach who works with LGBTQ+ creators, change-makers, and thought leaders to efficiently accomplish their goals, create a life they love, and make a difference in the process.If you're a creator or change-maker who wants to enjoy life and create a thriving business that makes a difference, you'll want to subscribe to my Substack where I publish weekly in-depth self-mastery practices and efficient productivity frameworks. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
For once, I'm the one being asked the questions! Enjoy this re-cast of the podcast, 40 Plus: Gay Men. Gay Talk, hosted by Rick Clemons."Ever feel challenged to live an inspired queer life? Feeling aimless and not sure what is next? Fellow Queer coach Darren Stehle challenges us to take a deeper step into self-mastery, ideation, and the journey of inspired action to live our most powerful lives as gay men over 40. You’ll learn useful techniques for bringing your ideal life to life."Rick Clemons is a well-known culture disruptor (in a good way), “closet buster (coming out coach),” and bold move strategist – inspiring people to live life with no excuses, no fears, no apologies. Tapping into his 25+ years of experience in personal development, and leveraging being a late bloomer, coming out of the closet at 36, he’s created a no B.S. approach for thriving as a gay man and father – personally and professionally. Rick loves writing (Frankly My Dear I’m Gay), podcasting (Life (UN)Closeted and 40 Plus: Gay Men. Gay Talk), facilitating out-of-the-ordinary personal development experiences and speaking to audiences across the globe on living life without apologies. He loves wine, his two grown daughters, and his husband, in that order (but don’t tell the hubby where he fits in the pecking order). Visit his website at RickClemons.com.   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Without values, it’s challenging to create a long-term life plan. If you don’t know what’s most important to you, you can’t make choices based on integrity. Values are the compass that keeps you on the path to accomplishing your most meaningful goals and dreams. When you know what’s essential and meaningful, you can skillfully respond with choices and actions that are in alignment with whom you want to be.What you can control are your choices. If you make decisions in accordance with your values, you’re creating a form of prediction that increases certainty and manages your stress response to difficult situations or environments. This acts as a reminder of whom you want to be at the moment.==========If you’re an LGBTQ+ creator, change-maker, or thought leader who is struggling with direction, priorities, and productivity, let’s meet for a conversation to discuss how you can accomplish your goals, create a life you love — and make a difference in the process. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Self-talk that creates self-judgement, comparison, and shame is not self-empowering.It’s downright unhealthy and damaging to your self-esteem!If you’ve truly done something wrong you feel guilt about, own up to it. However, if you’re struggling with something not going to plan — for example, how to make more money, get a better job, or why your business isn’t growing — consider if you’re missing skills or knowledge.Ask yourself, “Am I ignorant or incompetent?”Ignorant = you don’t know somethingIncompetent = you’re lacking a skillThe difference between staying stuck where you are or overcoming adversity is whether you’re willfully ignorant and incompetent or consciously aware of what you don’t know and the skills you’re lacking.Admitting what you don’t know is the first step toward transformation and creating a better future.If you’re struggling, doubting yourself, or wondering “What’s wrong with me?”, let’s have a conversation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Ever since I was a little boy, I’ve dreamt small.I was a sickly child with severe ADHD. I had a learning disability that made it hard for me to read letters. And I was gay without knowing what that meant.Other kids and a few teachers made me feel like an outsider and not good enough.My health issues, which attracted unwanted attention, and being in the closet kept me fearful of freely expressing my truth. I was too scared to talk about it with my parents because the root of my fear was the thing I knew about myself but didn’t understand. My thoughts were, I’m no good, I’m not well, I’m not smart enough, I’ll never amount to anything.I allowed those perceptions to limit my life into my early 40s...**********If you’re an LGBTQ+ change-maker who’s ready to transform into an impactful leader and make a difference, let's have a conversation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this week's episode, I speak with Omid Razavi, the Executive Director, and Ethan Berkeley-Garcia, Youth Ambassador of It Gets Better Canada.I had such a great time hosting this interview. It's clear to me how committed both Omid and Ethan are to this important organization and the impact it's had on their own lives.Complete show notes, bios, and links ☞ https://darrenstehle.com/it-gets-better-canada/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In neuroscience, the ACC is an acronym for the anterior cingulate cortex, the part of the brain commonly called the animal or mammalian brain.Most animals have basic needs like food, shelter, safety, and procreation. If those needs are met, the animal feels safe. If not, they feel higher levels of stress and threat. Humans have the same needs.The ACC has a second meaning from a personal leadership and behavioural viewpoint.In this context, the ACC stands for Acceptance, Connection, and Care (credit to my coach, Dax Moy). These are core human emotions which collectively and independently demonstrate love in the largest sense of the word. When any one of those emotional needs is not met, we do not feel safe.☞ Read the complete article here.**********As a queer thought leader, neuro-coach, writer, and podcaster, Darren Stehle helps LGBTQ+ creators and change-makers develop their self-mastery and go from confusion to making an impactful difference in the world. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In this episode, I speak with the Co-Director, Producer, and Editor of the film, Chelle Turingan.Organizing in church basements, classrooms and around kitchen tables, they take on a conservative town council that won’t fly a rainbow flag and bend some rules to create a safe space for youth to come out. Despite experiences of isolation and discrimination, they love their communities and strive to make them places where everyone, no matter who and how they love, can live and thrive. ☞ Complete Show Notes, Links and Trailers  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
You have the power to demand inclusion, dignity, and respect 365 days a year because you can take your purchasing power elsewhere.But don’t sit in silence with your decision to support LGBTQ+ businesses or allies.☞ Read the full article here.**********As a queer thought leader, neuro-coach, writer, and podcaster, Darren Stehle helps LGBTQ+ creators and change-makers develop their self-mastery and go from confusion to making an impactful difference in the world.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
We are overwhelmed by the untenable problems in the world and have little capacity left to feel like we have the agency to make a difference.Even for those of us with practiced emotional resilience, we face moments when we can’t take it anymore. When that happens, you need to take care of yourself, calm your reactive emotions and mind, and find ways to reconnect with other people who embody understanding, connection, and empathy. Otherwise, you’ll shut down completely, or veer in the opposite direction of outrage, disgust, and argument.Here are 6 easy skills to practice protecting your peace of mind, to lead with integrity at work, at home, and for the people you care about.📖 Read the article here. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
These tests can be a leaping-off-point, but not a justification for who you are, perhaps for the simple reason that they are not factual. Find out why I don't use these kinds of tests with my clients and why I think they can be used as an excuse or a crutch.Read the article☞ Are Personality Assessments Like Myers-Briggs and Enneagrams Useful When You’re Working with a Coach?Discover my IDEA(tion) approach to personal transformation.Designed to help you gain Insight, Direction, and Emotional Alignment so you can efficiently accomplish your goals and enjoy more happiness, freedom, and peace of mind. Contact me for a free session. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Sincerely held religious beliefs lack critical thought. They’re unreasonable towards people who don’t believe or disagree. Pre-judgement of non-believers is what makes them hypocritical.☞ Read the original postArticles mentioned in the episode:The Threat of Religious Extremism and Radicalized Individuals to the Common Good“Sincerely Held Religious Beliefs” – A Specious Defence of Prejudice Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
In every aspect of how Dax Moy shows up in the world is his desire to help people experience themselves as the version of themselves that they most want to meet.Dax is a coach, educator, mentor, author, public speaker, and strength trainer. He was my coach for a year and a half while I was part of his MindMap Mastery Coach training program.Click here to read the show notes or watch the video. -----Every Thursday at 1 PM (EST), I offer a free 1:1 coaching session with an individual queer creator.Get clarity about your ideas and create effective strategies to make immediate progress on your most meaningful project or goal. This is a first-come-first-served weekly session and it’s completely free. ☞ Register here: https://darrenstehle.com/events Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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