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Geisler's Guidelines

Author: Jordan Geisler

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Welcome to Geisler's Guidelines, the blog-turned-podcast! Sit down with the slightly informed, sarcastic, and somewhat innocent Jordan Geisler and his very special guests as they jump into lively discussions and bizarre tangents. Enjoy almost-edgy and occasionally irreverent topics paired with out-of-the-box, Jordan-original games and segments. Tune in to hear what absolutely no one is (but should be) raving about!
31 Episodes
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To celebrate the series finale, Jordan invites the guest who helped push him to pursue doing a podcast: his cousin, Susan Silva. Together, the two discuss the meaning of power in their lives, whether they consider themselves powerful, times they've been powerless, and the most valuable kind of power. Later, they engage in Mad Lib Dating Profile where they create people they instantly fall in love with. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening and being a part of the journey! And be sure to look for Jordan’s upcoming project, the Roast and Toast Podcast, when it debuts in a few weeks!
Jordan’s good friend Ashley comes on the podcast to talk about their problems with pain. Together they delve into the problem with the concept “forgive and forget,” the differences between emotional and physical pain, and the importance of learning to let things go. Later, they play a game of Hot or Not that unintentionally involves a lot of Marvel characters. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Former guests John Shupe and Rhiane Steinhauer (S2 E1) come back on the show to roast and toast (more roast than toast) the heck out of the 2006 flop "Zoom." Together they go through the many plotholes of the movie, how Chevy Chase is essentially Elton John, Courtney Cox's inability to walk, the worst superhero fight in movie history, the disgust of Spencer Breslin's superpower, Tim Allen’s pervy finger, and much, much more! They also introduce a new Roast & Toast segment dedicated to viewing 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 star movie reviews. Later, they play a game of Shoot Your Shot and instantly regret it. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Welcome to what was originally scheduled as the season 3 opener, but alas is another episode in season 2. In the episode, Jordan makes some very important announcements about the future of the podcast. Jordan's (ex-)wife, Rachel Oldham, comes on the show to talk about emotions. Together, the married couple discusses their most frequently felt emotions, whether they think more with their head or their heart, and how they feel about sharing their emotions with other people. Afterwards, they play a rousing game of Character Profile where Jordan laughs way too hard over someone eating lotion. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
In what was originally scheduled as the season 2 finale (but is explained at the beginning of this episode), Jordan ropes in his sister Paige (from S1 E2 and S2 E10) and cousins Lily (S1 E4) and Olivia (S1 E5) to talk about their sibling relationships. Together they discuss what they think of their siblings, how their relationship dynamic has changed over the years, and their funniest stories about their sibling. Also, there are amazing tangents including, but not limited to, an almost R-rated discussion on the  American Girl Doll puberty book, Jordan's aversion to fruits and vegetables, and anger issues. Later, they resurrect the game 15 Shades of Jordan, which is now 10 Shades of Jordan. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his long-time friend Katie Snider flashback to their high school days and their popularity. They explain their nearly decade-long friendship and how multiple group projects and classes have brought them to become friends. Together, the two friends discuss how people become popular, Jordan's sandwich model of high-school popularity, and whether they think they were popular or not during their time in high-school. Plus, they look back upon the mythic Viking Bertha. Later, they play a rousing game of Spin-Off. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Due to her losing a bet, Paige Geisler comes back on the show to do a Roast and Toast of the 2007 heist movie Mad Money starring Diane Keaton, Queen Latifah, Katie Holmes, and Ted Danson. Together, Paige and Jordan discuss the major issues of the movie while covering its very few good points. They discuss the underlining racism and white privilege, not knowing characters’ names, draped sweaters, Martha Stewart, typical stereotypes and tropes portrayed by the characters, and sexual harassment. Later, they play a new game called Mad Lib Dating Profile. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his good friend Tiffany spill some tea on all of the stress in their lives. Together they discuss times they've been overly stressed, when they've been driven to tears from stress, and what they think the difference is between stress and anxiety. Later, they play a brand new game about their attraction to celebrities and other famous figures called Hot or Not, and they end up plotting to get a political alliance going on between President Trump and Queen Elizabeth. Also, be sure to watch the movie Mad Money to prepare for the next episode's Roast and Toast with Paige Geisler (the movie is available on Netflix). Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Returning guest and Jordan's former/still-kind-of-current boss Paula Koch comes back on the show for a discussion about the most taboo conversation topic: religion. Together, Jordan and Paula discuss their personal beliefs, including their perceptions on heaven and hell, negative/positive experiences they've had with religion, the difference between religion and spirituality, the role and reputation of evangelical Christians, and whether or not animals have souls. Later, they play a rousing game of Accent Improv. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his former professor KT talk about the roles criticism plays in their lives. They get into the difference (if any) between criticism and feedback, times they've received good/bad criticism, learning how to keep things to themselves, and how criticism has evolved in recent years. Plus, there's a whole discussion on the sub-topics of control and power. Later, they play an all new game called Shoot Your Shot, which involves drinking terrible drinks and deciphering the truth. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his former English teacher Becky Spies sit down to talk about conflict. Together, they discuss their distaste for conflict and how they deal with it (like how Jordan watches it on reality TV). They discuss their approaches to dealing with conflict, particularly bad conflicts they've had, the difference between conflict and confrontation, and how conflict with family members is different than conflict with friends. They also go over the dynamic of apologies between parents and children when Jordan rehashes a recent discussion he had with his parents while also revealing how terrible petty he is. Later, they play what may be the best game of Character Profile in the history of the show! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
In possibly the funniest episode thus far, Jordan and his good friends/former small group leaders Steve and Kelly recall their many mishaps and stories of embarrassment. Together, they delve into their most embarrassing moments, times they embarrassed other people, and how they deal with shame and learn to move on. They discuss how embarrassment is both healthy and unhealthy, and how seeing other people embarrass themselves brings out the human in them. Later, both Steve and Kelli set new high-scores for Viral Vocab! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his great friend and classmate Keionna dive into the concept of body image. Together they talk about their best/worst features,  the criticism they've faced over how they look, the power behind taking up space, and what they think the ideal body looks like for men and women. Plus, they settle the debate on whether or not wearing sweat pants to school is OK. Later, they do a Cold Reading about a man needing butt surgery. And, as if the episode couldn't be topped, both Jordan and Keionna do a segment of Screw It. Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his humor-appreciating friend Rachel discuss honesty while dancing around the truth of who exactly they're being honest about. Together they discuss the intricacies of white lies, feeling guilty for lying, and whether or not withholding information should be considered lying. Later, they play a game of Florida Man: Real or Unreal? to see if Rachel can beat the highest score. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidlines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan gets more flack than ever before by having his friend (and former podcast host) Matthew Keck on the show. Together (with brand new recording equipment!) they discuss their takes on health and fitness, including their opinions on gyms, body-shaming, and embarrassing moments they've had while exercising. They get on crazy tangents involving Jordan being a dictator and their distaste for Gym-stagramers. Plus, Jordan does his final segment of "Recently On Big Brother" and initiates his first segment of "Screw It": a segment dedicated to ranting. Later, they play a game of Character Profile, which, unfortunately, is mostly destroyed due to a technical error. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
To make up for the lack of a season 1 finale, Jordan does a Geisler's Guidelines first and has a Roast and Toast of a movie! Jordan and his great friend Rebecca Boiney do a Roast and Toast of the 1994 Tim Allen Christmas movie The Santa Clause. Together, they dissect the issues of the movie while also acknowledging its few areas of merit, including, but not limited to, child acting, Tim Allen's insult skills, the disregard for the concept of time, fat-shaming, a very scandalous deleted scene, a bad dance number, and the need for a prequel depicting an evil Santa. Afterwards, they play a Christmas-themed version of In Other Words (despite the fact Jordan wrongly calls it "Spin Off" on the show). Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Welcome to season two, where new games, a new logo, and new segments abound! Jordan explains and apologizes for the lack of a season finale in season 1, but promises to make up for it at a later time. In honor of making it to two seasons, Jordan brings two guests on the show: his good friends John and Rhiane. This is also the final episode with a terrible recording device, so apologies to John that most of his audio in the first twenty minutes is hard to hear. Together, the group delves into the failures of their past (and present), how they've managed to overcome them, and what failures in particular stand out above all others. They also discuss plans for their 21st birthdays, the horrors of solo and ensemble in middle-school band class, and Jordan gives his second on-air PSA about crying. Plus, to kick off season two, Jordan introduces a new segment. Later, they all play an excellent game of Spin-Off (which Jordan wins, and kinda cheats at). Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. The Geisler's Guidelines cover art is thanks to Olivia Buchanan and Susan Silva. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his wonderful octogenarian friend Connie dig into how they've experienced gender roles throughout their lives...and it turns out, for the most part, they haven't. Along the way they discuss gender roles within jobs they've had, their thoughts on the worst gender roles for men and women, and whether or not gender roles will ever go away. Later, they give a PSA about crying and Jordan rants about the challenges of not being very athletic. Afterwards, they play Florida Man: Real or Unreal? where Connie ties with Olivia Buchanan's highscore. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
Jordan and his former busmate/tennis teammate/neighbor Brooke Zarotny get spiritual and also depressed as they talk about death. They go over people they've lost, what they believe comes after death, and the concept of eternity. They also go on tangents about their deceased driving test instructor George Washington, car accidents in their own driveways, and the downfall of their old high-school. Later, they play Curse of the Alphabet, a new game revolving around using words starting with specific letters. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
After a lot of deliberation, Jordan finally decides to have his parents be on the podcast--or is it that they let him let them be on the podcast? Together they delve into the many downsides of popular culture...and its few upsides. They discuss the power of fame, how self-absorbed popular culture is, and the ability of spreading awareness through social media. Plus, they spend a solid portion of the episode discussing their distaste for some old and current trends, and Jordan discusses the devolution of Spongebob. Later, they play a game of Modern Slang (now called Viral Vocab) where, after some light reviewing, Jordan's dad unfortunately doesn't set a new record. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so that you never miss an episode! Please leave a review so other people know that Geisler's Guidelines is well worth a listen. Follow Jordan on Instagram @savage_sasquatch78, and if you'd like to suggest a topic for discussion, send it to geislersguidelines@gmail.com. Thanks for listening!
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